“We need to get him to a hospital. He’s lost too much blood for me to help.” Butch reports to Kayne.
“No hospitals. Hospital means police and we can’t have that right now. I know a doctor who can help.” Kayne pulls out his cell phone and dials a number. “Get him in the van and follow me.”
Ace came back from the wreckage and helped Butch, Rooster, Kayne, Tatt and the Prospect carry Stryker to the back of the van. I climbed inside, cradling his head on my lap, trying to stop the blood. There’s so much blood, I don’t know how Stryker’s going to survive.
“You better not die on me,” I say to Stryker with tears in my eyes. I move his sweaty hair off his forehead and press mine to his. “I love you, Stryker, so you need to come back. I can’t do this without you.”
The van takes off and the bumps in the road are jarring us all over the place. “Take it easy Prospect,” I shout to the front.
“Sorry, Holly. I’m trying to keep up with Kayne.” His voice is terrified and if he wants to make it in Savage Saints, MC, he has to grow a set of balls.
“I don’t give a fuck. You need to be careful or learn how to fucking drive again.” I’m so pissed, that I’m swearing at the prospect. Something I hardly ever do.
“Sorry, ma’am.”
“Look, if you want to make it here, you’re going to have to grow some balls and stop being afraid of your own shadow. I know Butch vouched for you, but right now, you’re making him look bad. And if you make Butch look bad, that makes the whole Savage Saints look weak. Man the fuck up and take care of business. But watch the fucking bumps, Prospect.” Silence. Either he doesn’t know what to say or he’s taking my words into consideration.
What feels like forever, but was only a matter of fifteen minutes, and fewer bumps, the Prospect pulls the van over and shuts it off. The back doors fly open and hands reach inside to grab Stryker. Kayne, Butch, Ace, Rooster and the Prospect lift him out of the van and onto an awaiting stretcher. There’s a young female doctor standing next to the stretcher. She checks Stryker over the moment they lay him down. He’s still unconscious.
“Come on Holly, let’s get you cleaned up,” Kayne turns to me when they wheel Stryker away.
“Where are they taking him?” I ask quietly.
“Doc used to work at a hospital but now works for us once in a while. She has a pretty good set up here. We only call her when Butch can’t fix whoever’s injured.”
Kayne leads me up a huge staircase that gives away to a big white three-story house. The front door is open and we step inside. My feet echo on hardwood floors as we walk across the foyer. There’s a grand staircase in front of me that leads to several rooms. Kayne turns left and bypasses the staircase. The house is immaculate and I could easily get lost in here. He opens a door behind the staircase, motioning for me to enter.
I take hesitant steps inside the room and my jaw drops. It’s a huge bathroom with a massive claw foot tub, a marble countertop with stainless steel double sinks and a mirror behind it.
“Go ahead and get cleaned up, I’ll see if Doc has a change of clothes for you,” Kayne says, closing the door behind him.
Once I’m alone, I look in the mirror. I look like death reigned down on me. My curls are sticking up all over the place, dark bags circle my eyes and my face is pale. I have splatters of Stryker’s blood on my face and down the front of me. My hands are stained with his blood. I turn the water on in the sink as hot as I can stand it. I scrub my hands trying to get his blood off. Once the water turns from red to clear I cup some in the palm of my hands and splash it over my face, letting the hot water refresh me. There’s a washcloth sitting on the side of the sink and I use it to clean my face and arms.
There’s a knock on the door and the handle turns. Panic sets in. I look around the bathroom for a weapon to use. My fingers grip a metal hand soap bottle and raise it above my head. The door swings open and Siren comes in.
“Fuck, girl. It’s just me bringing you a change of clothes.” Siren’s eyes zero in on the soap dispenser above my head.
I drop it and tears roll down my face. “I’m sorry. I freaked out.”
Siren sets the clothes she brought me down on the edge of the counter and gathers me in her arms. “Hey, it’s Ok. I get it. Trust me. It’s fine to defend yourself.” Siren soothes my hair back from my face.
“I don’t know why I keep acting like this. I’m so sick of being afraid of everything. I’ve been scared of my own shadow my whole life and now when Stryker needs me the most, I can’t pull myself together long enough to be there for him. I’m not strong enough. I’m a failure.” I confess.
“Holly, stop.” Siren holds my shoulders at arm’s length. “You’ve been through traumatic experiences almost your whole life. You fought your way out of an abusive situation. You set up a good life here. You found a man, even though he’s a brooding asshole to most, who will do anything to keep you safe and keep you by his side. You’ve fought off your attacker, you are beating the poison in your system. You stood up to someone tormenting you. You’re strong. You’re courageous and you’re worth it all.” Siren squeezes my shoulders and pulls me into her skinny arms. “You. Are. Worth. It. All.”
She gives me a tight hug and something inside of me clicks. Something changes in my heart. She’s right. After everything I’ve been through, the last thought in my mind was to inflict pain on myself. I didn’t even have the urge to reach for a blade.
“Can I tell you something, Siren?”
“Sure, hun. You can tell me anything. You’re dating my brother now.” There’s a light sparkle in her eyes when she says this.
“Back when I was telling the MC about my past, I didn’t tell them about one thing. Stryker knows and I want you to know about it.” I inhale a deep breath. “When the whores and the Serpents used to drug me, in order to regain control, I would cut. It was a release for me for the pain they inflicted on me. I haven’t had the urge today. My focus was on helping Stryker. I don’t even have the urge now. He helped me more than he realizes.” A smile forms on my lips.
“That’s wonderful, Holly. That means you’re beating whatever demons are trying to drag you down. Don’t lose focus on that.” Siren hugs me one last time and heads for the door.
“Where are you going?” I ask.
“I’m giving you some privacy to get changed and pull yourself together. You have to do this on your own. Whether you haven’t had the urge or not, this is something you have to do for yourself. I can’t be here to hold your hand and enable you. You have to want to do this for you. Not Stryker, not me, not the MC. You have to do it for you.” Siren gives me a smile. “I’m proud of you. Keep pushing on and don’t let the darkness take over.” She slips out the door, closing it behind her.
“I have to do it for me,” I repeat to myself over and over.
“I’m strong enough.” I pull my blood-stained shirt over my head.
“I’m worth everything I want.” I shimmy out of my jeans.
Taking a long look in the mirror, seeing the white scars on my thighs in the harsh bathroom light through a different perspective. I run a finger over the longest one that goes from the outer edge of the top of my thigh across my leg and into my inner thigh. This one was when I reached rock bottom. This one was after Sledge took my body and almost broke my mind. I remember the way it felt having the blade skin deep into my skin. I remember the controlled pain overtaking my mind and pushing what he did to me that day away. The way the shiny metal coated in my blood as it ripped the skin away releasing my mind from focusing on what he did to my body, to what I controlled. What pain I had control over.
A tear slips down my cheek and drops to the tiled floor. These aren’t shameful scars. They’re battle scars that made me stronger. They’re my past written on the surface of my body. I’ve come to accept them for what they are. I don’t want to be that person anymore hiding who I am. I want to be strong, in control and a fighter. I vow as I look at them all, touching each one wi
th gentle care, that I will wear them with pride. I won’t hide anymore.
I’m strong.
I’m a fighter.
I’m worth it.
With newfound peace, I quickly change into the clothes Siren brought to me. She grabbed me a pair of yoga shorts and a tank top. I slip the soft black material over my legs and the white tank top over my head. I finger brush my hair and pull my messy curls up into a ponytail. I slip my tennis shoes back on. I take one last look in the mirror to make sure I have all the blood washed away. The soft brown eyes staring back at me are telling me it’s time to take back control and be there for Stryker any way possible. It’s time to regain everything I’ve lost since I was a little girl.
I open the bathroom door and Rooster is leaning against the wall across the hallway. Alyssa is standing next to him with tears in her eyes. His face is ridged and he’s clenching his jaw tight. Alyssa spots me and wipes the tears away.
“Everything OK?” I ask her.
Alyssa nods her head, “Yes, fine.” She looks up at Rooster with a hopeful expression. “I’ll talk to you later?”
Rooster releases a deep sigh, swallowing hard. “Maybe. Depends on what I’m doing.” He turns his eyes onto me. “Kayne wants me to bring you up to Stryker. He’s out of surgery and doing fine.”
Relief fills my body at this news. Rooster kicks off the wall, ignoring Alyssa and walks down the hallway back the way Kayne and I came in. His back is stiff and he’s clenching his hands into fists at his sides. I follow behind him, not saying a word. Rooster walks up the grand staircase, his boots echoing off the wood with every heavy step he takes.
“You know, Rooster, you can talk to me. When you’re ready.” I reach him and we walk together.
“Thanks, but I’m good. Things are shifting and moving. I’m just trying to stay ahead of the game.”
“I get it. I’ve been around you guys long enough that I consider all of you family. So, if you need a woman’s perspective, your secret is safe with me.”
We stop at the top of the stairs and Rooster motions with his head to the second door on the left. Kayne, Blayde, Siren, Poison, the whole Savage Saints is outside the door with their heads bowed down. Talon is standing in the middle of them all saying a prayer when I approach. It’s the most beautiful sight I’ve ever seen. All these men and women dressed as badass bikers decked out in leather, kneeling around their Chaplin in prayer. Kayne picks his head up and gives me a signal to go inside. He puts his head back down and squeezes Poison’s hand.
I grab the doorknob and turn. The wood gives away and there lying in the center of a bed with tubes and wires hooked up to him is my man. My strong, yet loveable brooding asshole, Stryker. I slip inside and shut the door behind me. I watch the rise and fall of his chest against the white sheets. There’s a white bandage covering his left shoulder. His eyes are closed and the monitor is beeping steadily next to him. I keep staring at him, afraid to move.
“Are you going to keep standing over there ogling me or are you going to bring your sexy ass over here?” Stryker’s voice catches me off guard. It’s laced with sleep and sexy all at once.
My feet are moving on their own, drawing me closer to him. He opens his eyes and trails them up and down my body. “Damn, love the little outfit.” He holds out his hand and I immediately take it. His fingers are warm against my skin.
“I was so scared I lost you,” I say with tears welling in my eyes.
“Don’t you know by now? You can’t get rid of me. Just another battle scar to wear proudly. Hurts like a bitch though.” Stryker pulls me down onto the bed next to him. I carefully maneuver my body around the tubes and wires. “Damn these things are unnecessary,” Stryker grumbles. A giggle escapes my lips. “That sound is music to my ears. I want to bottle it up and bring it out whenever I need it.”
Stryker kisses the top of my messy hair and tightens his good arm around me. I peer up at him through my lashes. “What happened? I haven’t talked to anyone about it.” I run my fingers over the bruising on his cheek.
“Ace took me to an underground fighting ring. I needed to blow off some steam and that helped. After I told him about Siren being my sister, we realized she was in danger. Because of me.” Stryker clenches his jaw and his heart monitor beeps faster. He rips the wires off and tosses them aside, making the machine go crazy. A steady beep floats around us. I get up and unplug the machine from the wall, silencing the room. Stryker holds up his good arm and motions for me to rejoin him. I carefully lift the light blanket covering him and snuggle into his side. “Much better.”
“You were saying?” I look into Stryker’s blue eyes. He’s staring back at me, his eyes hooded with desire.
“When we arrived at The Diner, a car was idling across the street. Once Blayde and Siren came out, they opened fire on us. I took one to the shoulder and then we opened fire on the car, causing it to crash.”
“Do you know who it was?”
“I have a suspicion it was Karl Maverick’s men but I don’t know for sure. Not yet. Once I get the fuck out of here, I will find out.” Stryker’s jaw clenches tight and his arm holds me tighter.
“Hey,” I say pulling his face down to mine. “It’s going to be OK. I’m right here, you’ll heal and everything will fall into place.”
“Most everything already has. I have you.” Stryker’s lips find mine and he gently kisses me. He runs his tongue along the seam of my lips and I open them on a moan. He plunges inside my mouth and explores every inch of my mouth with his tongue. My body is on fire with every stroke of his tongue. His good arm grips my shoulder, pushing me closer to him. A sensual sweet kiss is turning into a hot inferno I’m ready to dive head first into. I bring one leg over his waist and straddle him. His hard cock presses into my center creating a desire deep inside my core.
“Fuck I need inside you, Lil’ Bit,” Stryker mumbles against my lips. I look down at Stryker, kissing him and grinding my hips down onto him. He groans and lifts his hips so his hardness presses harder into me. “Go lock the door.”
I crawl my way down Stryker’s body, kissing him as I go. Once I reach his cock straining against his boxers, I place a soft kiss against the fabric. It twitches against my lips and Stryker growls. I quickly get up and saunter over to the door. I turn the lock. The click vibrating all around me. Panic doesn’t set in like it does before. Instead, I feel at peace and in control. I turn around and lean against the door, pushing my chest out. I watch Stryker, watching me. He licks his lips, his eyes are hooded with desire. The move sets fire to my skin. I saunter to the right side of his bed, Stryker watching every move with desire in his eyes. His chest is heaving.
“Take it off.” The command in his husky voice makes my panties even wetter, my core throbbing with want. I strip the tank top and bra off and drop them on the floor. My heavy breasts are begging for his attention. I slip my shoes off and slid my shorts and panties down my legs and kick them off to the side. Standing there baring myself to Stryker, I feel empowered. That my body can make a strong man like him crumble to his knees. Stryker sits up slightly and gestures with his hand. “Come here.”
I climb onto the bed and straddle Stryker. His hardness pressing into my naked center. His fingers run along the top of my left thigh, over my scars. “So beautiful.” He places a kiss on my collar bone. “So perfect.” His hot breath runs across my skin creating goosebumps to break out on my flesh. “So mine.” He trails his lips down to my breasts, begging for attention. He captures one nipple in his mouth, lightly biting and sucking. I hold the back of his head against me while he lavishes my aching breasts, causing my body to set on fire.
“Stryker,” I pant. “I need you, now.”
Stryker releases my nipple with a pop and rolls his hips into me. A moan escapes my lips. “You’ve got to do the rest, Lil’ Bit.”
He’s giving me the control. The power. I kiss his lips hard and press down onto his hardness. The fabric of his boxers is rubbing against my clit and I moan in
to his mouth. He swallows my cries of desire with every stroke of his tongue against mine. I reach between us and free his cock from its restraints. Wrapping my fingers around his width, I squeeze tight pulling my hand up and down his length. A growl forms in his throat.
Guiding him to my soaked entrance, I release his cock and lower myself onto him. A moan escapes both our lips as his hard cock fills me up.
“So tight, perfect and mine.” Stryker groans against my lips. I roll my hips taking him deeper into me. I set the pace, gliding up and down onto his hard cock. With this angle, he goes deeper than he’s ever been. “That’s it, Lil’ Bit. Ride me.” Stryker leans back and watches me ride his cock. I lift up and then plunge back down. He rolls his hips up and into me when I come down. Fire races down my spine. Stryker grips my left thigh holding me onto him. I move back and forth creating friction on my clit.
“Oh, God, Stryker.” I pant.
“Come for me, Lil’ Bit. I want to feel you grip my cock hard. Draining everything from me into you.” I pick up the pace moving my hips back and forth, up and down. Sweat beads on my brow when I search for Stryker’s lips. We connect and he kisses me harder than he ever has before. I moan while riding his cock, taking him into me with hard strokes. Fire races down my spine as my pussy clamps down onto him. Stryker hardens inside of me and we both fall over the edge on a moan.
“Holy shit.” That’s all I can say while I ride the waves of ecstasy. Breathing hard, I kiss him tenderly, our bodies moving together as one. My pussy quivering around his cock. Stryker grunts and empties himself inside of me connecting us together on another level.
One heart
One soul.
One salvation.
I collapse on top of him and roll away from his bad shoulder. I swallow the three little words I want to say to him. I want to tell him so badly how much I love him and how much he means to me, but I hold back.
Stryker's Salvation (A Savage Saints MC Book 3) Page 13