He got her napkin, arranging it for her before doing his.
“This looks great,” I said, a serious aroma going on in my aunt’s kitchen. I bounced my shoulders. “And I definitely hadn’t been able to get to the store so thank you.”
Not to mention my meals lately consisted of usually frozen entrees and energy smoothies. I’d never been much of a cook back in Chicago and surely wasn’t now.
A smile tugging at his lips, Gray grabbed the casserole dish.
“You actually have Laura to thank,” he said, serving her first. “She made most of this.”
Shocked, I jumped my brow in her direction. She wouldn’t look at me, but that pink on her cheeks flashed bright crimson. Upon facing Gray, my look was more than curious. I obviously didn’t know them in their day to day, but Laura really didn’t seem like one to “help” in the kitchen. And if she had…
The pair definitely seemed… different tonight, the tone in the air different. I’d been around them for some time now and Grayden, when he wasn’t running from me, put his focus either completely in his work or acting as a visual shield for his daughter. He surrounded her with this almost protective energy all the time. He was never casual, never at ease.
But he seemed so now, and then there was Laura, the little girl with the brown eyes who could never find me. She always looked down, away even when I played the piano.
I watched her, chin on my palm. She’d definitely opened up a lot in the passing days, letting me play for her and being around her now. She actually looked at Grayden when he said something to her, his comment surrounding how good her food was. He smiled at her, making her bashful again and maybe this was their routine. Like I said, I didn’t know them too well.
Shaking my head out of my thoughts, I tried the food. It was very good indeed.
Dinner had been filled with a silence but it hadn’t been a bad one. Peaceful, it almost felt like harmony, and like I said, it was nice not to be alone. I ate more food than I probably should have and, eventually, the baking dish was nearly clear.
“I’ll take care of the dishes,” Gray said, pushing himself from the table. He grabbed everyone’s taking them to the sink, and almost instantly, Laura got up. She left the room, going into the living room and I spotted her right away as the kitchen and living room were connected.
Sitting at the piano bench, she placed her hands in her lap and I smiled at her.
“She wanted to come,” came behind me and I turned, Gray.
Tossing a glance over his shoulder, he almost seemed dismissive, but the soft crease of his eyes told different as he washed dishes.
“She didn’t say it obviously,” he said, looking at me again. His expression warmed. “But she said it. She wanted to come. She wanted to see you.”
She wanted to see me.
I didn’t know exactly if he was right. After all, he did say she didn’t actually say anything, but she was at the piano bench now and I was happy to play for her. I always would.
Tonight seemed different from the days I usually played, more pressure, different like so many things tonight, especially when Grayden came out into the living room.
His dish washing ceased, he sat on my aunt’s couch. He didn’t watch me, gaze distinctively placed outside the window but that didn’t mean I wasn’t aware of his presence. His focus soft, his stare ahead into the storm outside with his arm at the back of the sofa. He listened to me, listened as his daughter sat currently beside me.
Eyes closed, I knew this particular piece by heart. I figured it’d be perfect tonight, warm with the storm.
The room silent but for my keys, I played, the little body beside me I knew to be dutifully watching. That’s what she did. She just watched, never played but I noticed something else different tonight too.
She sat up today, staring at my hands with her own in her lap. I had her full attention I assumed most days I played, but today? Well, I knew I had it if that made sense.
It made the pressure to play that much harder, but the attention around me kept me focused.
I played one song, then two, easily going into five before my hands felt the burn a little. I just didn’t want to stop playing. I hadn’t enjoyed it this much since I’d been a teen.
Literally feeling the music, I let go of the last note of the fifth piece, opening my eyes.
I found myself alone.
A little body sat with me no more, but that’d been okay.
Turning my head, I spotted Gray and he faced me, I assumed, because of the lack of sound. Under his arm was my previous companion, Laura with her eyes closed tight. She must have fallen asleep sometime during my playing and I actually considered that a compliment.
I’d been able to put her at peace.
I wondered about that sometimes when I snuck glances over to her while I played at the piano, if she truly was at peace or had the world on her shoulders like her father seemingly did. I knew nothing about the pair at all, but the stress around them when I was in the same room with them did seem evident.
This seemed non-existent now, a sleeping child under her dad’s arm.
He looked down at her.
“I’m sorry,” he said, squeezing her shoulder before looking up at me. “She looked like she was falling asleep so I grabbed her and brought her over here.”
He had nothing to apologize for. Like I said, I took what she’d done as nothing but a compliment.
Moving, Grayden sat up a little. “Do you mind if she uses the guest room to nap for a little while or…”
Waving, I of course told him no problem, and adjusting, he got her arms around his neck before picking her up. Somewhere in her sleepy state, she must have known what was happening because her arms gripped around his neck when he put his hands under her legs, getting up from the couch. Nodding at me, he backed away, heading in the direction of the staircase, and I turned, placing my hands back on the piano.
I touched single keys, watching the raindrops outside above the piano. I’d never been one to be a composer, but there was as much music going on outside as in.
I played what I felt, stopping to listen for a little while. It was silent for a long time.
Until it wasn’t.
Music blended into the room when I swiveled around on my chair, the sounds of a rich and sultry sax melody playing around the room. It was intense, vibrant and suddenly the most hypnotic voice sang.
I knew it was Billie Holiday immediately and I closed my eyes, losing myself in her sound. I had no idea where the music came from until Gray closed the glass housing of the record player, a record sleeve in his hand when I opened my eyes.
He took it, placing it on top of the record player’s cabinet.
He put his hands together.
“I figured best to give your hands a rest. She’s asleep upstairs now, can’t hear you.”
But did he want to hear me? I shifted toward the piano.
“I’m willing to take requests if you want to hear something too,” I said, smiling at him. “I love playing and don’t mind.”
I found myself inspired tonight, playing pieces not just from my aunt’s library but memory as well. I was happy to play for him if he’d let me. He seemed to enjoy it before, but perhaps, something changed.
He came into the light, shadows from the turbulent storm outside basking his robust frame. He looked like a man of the mountain, his plaid shirt dry and covering his biceps. He must have gotten it from upstairs.
“Alicia,” he said, pushing his fingertips into the center of his palm. “Would you do me the honor of taking a well-deserved break?”
His hand went out then. I assumed for mine, and I accepted his invitation, letting him guide me to my feet. He had rough and weathered hands, that undoubtedly had seen things, touched things.
As soon as they were in mine, they left, the pair of us reconvening on the couch. He easily took up two cushions to my one.
“You play wonderfully,” he said, eyes on me. “And I hope you d
on’t mind me saying so.”
A compliment just couldn’t be a compliment with him.
A smile tugging at my lips, I placed an arm on the back of the sofa, resting my fingers against my forehead.
“Thank you,” I told him. “I hope current unavailable parties enjoyed it.”
“Feeling comfortable speaking on her behalf, I can tell you she did,” he said, nodding. “And speaking on my behalf I can say I did as well.”
Focused on me, no joke lingered in Grayden’s voice. Not that he’d joke about something like that, joke about anything.
I placed my hands in my lap, not really knowing what to do with all that. A flash of lightning hit and somehow Ms. Billie combated it, her song like a roar cry for peace. Slowly the waves outside settled, the wind and rain soft against the windows surrounding the couch. The quiet allowed us to really hear the music, relax into it, if you will.
Pushing my hands along my arms, I rolled my shoulder into the couch, staring off ahead and into the empty room. I probably would have done that for hours and might have if not for Gray beside me. Something summoned me to look at him.
His eyes on me, I felt him all over and the instance itself had become something I’d come to recognize every time he looked at me. His attention on me had become more frequent in the passing days. In fact, pretty much every day since I started playing for Laura. The glance even accompanied a smile most days but not this moment, something in his eyes made me sit up.
“I suppose I wanted to apologize,” he started with, his voice as serious as his blue eyes. His fingers coming down the scruff of his face, he turned toward me. “For what I said the day you started playing for Laura, or rather the tone in which I said it. It’d been inappropriate and you didn’t deserve that.”
He was referring to the confrontation we had about Laura’s mom, and though I hadn’t forgotten it, I had let it go. I felt I needed to, the line of questioning none of my business.
His lips moved. “Laura’s mom has always been a sensitive topic. I guess that’s why I snapped at you.”
And regarding the details involved I didn’t blame him, my hand coming down my arm.
“I shouldn’t have asked,” I admitted, my inquisitive nature only to blame. He was just always so secretive and Laura, well, she was different not much unlike Ava said about Gray. The whole town knew it but it was me who interacted with the pair on a day-to-day basis.
“You’re only human,” left Gray’s lips as he turned, but he faced me when I moved closer.
“I still shouldn’t have asked,” I said studying every line and every etch of worry in his skin so tanned from his days outside. They’d been days he worked for me, labored and pained so I could have something to give back to this town and my aunt who, though I hadn’t known well, I wanted to please.
He came here every day, worked and never once slacked in the vigor and care he put into each revision he placed upon this home. If anything, the changes brought him life, a work ethic I’d only seen in myself and the care I put into my own hard work at the office.
He came here with passion.
He came here with heart.
His dark lashes drew downward, his eyes on the cushions between us.
“Things got so bad after,” he said and it took me a second for me to realize he was referring to our previous conversation. It’d been a conversation that shouldn’t have been started in the first place and one that wouldn’t be pushed from my end again.
That didn’t mean I wouldn’t let him speak about it on his own free will, which he seemed to actually want to do now, his eyes closing almost as if…
Pained.
“She changed and I lost her—”
I stopped him with my fingers on the hem of his button-down, something I didn’t mean to do but couldn’t help. He sounded so awful and I just didn’t want him to hurt anymore.
His fingers wrapped around mine and he guided them up to my chin. I didn’t expect to feel something with the action. I didn’t expect to feel anything, least of all something I hadn’t felt in so long.
Even with Bastian.
My lips parted, Gray’s too as he looked at me, his thumb brushing along my bottom lip.
“I’m bad at this,” he said, hand pushing behind my neck. “I don’t do this.”
I didn’t understand “don’t do,” but bad, I welcomed. I had good before. I had games and I was sick of it. I’d experienced more than my fair share of expertise. Maybe it needed to be simple this time.
Maybe it needed to be Grayden.
I sat incredibly still, as he made his move. Like a teenager waiting for her first kiss and the hum of his lip didn’t disappoint.
Soft, he pinched mine between his, caging the back of my head in his large palm. If he really said he didn’t do this he was lying. He’d done this, was amazing at this.
He forced me into a protective conclave, the wide spread of his body approaching me. Still holding my hand, he placed them between my heart and his. Mine might have been racing, but his was living.
The muscle pounded with a pure and unrelenting heat, his mouth doing a dance with every suck and taste. His hand releasing mine and moving down to my hip, he brought me closer and might have gotten to do more… if not for the creak on the stairs.
Our lips parted as if instructed, my fingers going to my warm lips and Gray faced away from me. He looked up and sure enough a little person was on the stairwell, sleep still in her eyes from what I could see. She rubbed them and more creaks took her down the rest of the stairs.
While we waited for Laura to arrive, Gray and I just sat there, the warmth in the air just as heavy as when he’d been kissing me. I didn’t want to leave us and I guess Gray didn’t want to leave either.
A little turn of his head and his lips were on my cheek, his eyes closing slightly and the short hairs of his beard brushing my skin. So quick, I might not have even believed he’d done that, but the tingle of his whiskered flesh embedded itself deep. I took my hand to it as he got up and went to Laura before she could really cross into the living room.
He bent down, his hand on her shoulder. He spoke light so I didn’t hear him, but I assumed it was time to go when he stood, putting her coat on her, then picking her up by the waist.
Her arms around his neck, he faced me, some unsaid thing going on between us. I didn’t think it needed to be said, still feeling it on my lips and cheek.
His eyes warm on me, he nodded, backing away and I followed the two to the door, catching a set of angelic, sleepy eyes on me along the way. Getting into the hall, I waved at her, smiling as her dad opened the door and walked out with her. She didn’t do anything back, normal for her.
But then…
Her hand left her dad’s shoulder, so light I doubt Gray even felt it. He didn’t turn or anything like that, but I felt it, I felt the acknowledgement of that hand wave.
I felt Laura acknowledge me.
Chapter Thirteen
Alicia
My fingers moved what seemed like dozens of music books, the multiple spines bumping under my fingers in the quaint Mayfield library. I had to find the perfect piece, something I remembered playing as if it were yesterday. Spotting it, I forced it out and the weathered cover blasted so many memories back to me. I’d taken a myriad of piano classes over my life, both myself and my brothers did. Something about the music senior people in my life enjoyed hearing and I hadn’t gotten it at that time, not amongst the dozens upon dozens of classes and recitals I’d been a part of.
But after yesterday, I was starting to understand it.
I felt it too. I felt so much and after getting up this morning I had to seek out the competition piece that resonated with so many when I played it as a teen. I’d traveled to New York City and everything back then, invited to play with the orchestra there during their annual concert. Every year they allowed a gifted student to be featured along with their talented musicians, and though I never thought myself as gifted, I had been prett
y good at one time. I won that year and got to play in Central Park, my entire family present.
I remembered the event as if it were yesterday now, but the notes themselves a little fuzzy hence my trip to the Mayfield Community Library. I wanted a book that had the classics, many of them and easy to be enjoyed. I had people that enjoyed them.
My mind spinning and still a bit confused, I fell into the influx of it. I honestly didn’t know what was going on between Gray and me, why I touched him or why he kissed me, but whatever it was I found myself hard pressed to want to stop. I just knew the link, the link between all of us was the music and I wanted to play more, connect us more and make everyone happy.
I wanted to be happy too.
Smiling, I pushed the book under my arm, ready for checkout and so distracted I ran into someone, stumbling back with an “Oops” between the pair of us. With the sudden impact, I’d been surprised neither one of us managed to drop our stuff but we’d been okay. We held on. Even still, I felt bad and asked her if she was okay. To my surprise, she said my name.
“Uh, yes,” I said not knowing this woman. I’d ventured to pretty much all the major stops in Mayfield in my time here but managed to miss her, and even though the woman was average in dress and demeanor, I felt like I’d remember her. Her dress quaint and her hair pinned, she gave the illusion of someone older or just maybe more distinguished and her smile on me definitely made me want to smile back. Some people just had that, a pleasantness about them.
Laughing a little, she pushed her hand back to her auburn-colored hair.
“I’m sorry, small town,” she said, the many books in her arms jumping with more laughter. “I’m Jolene, Jolene Berry. I teach elementary in town and I guess we all know you’re here. We all knew Jo well and loved her.”
This had been the second person in town beyond Ava to say such a thing, and though Gray hadn’t said anything similar, I didn’t have to be an investigative reporter to know what type of influence my aunt had on both himself and his daughter. It seemed four individuals had both loved and respected her and I had a feeling the numbers went well beyond that if actually looked into.
His Sweetest Song Page 11