Santana became quiet before speaking again. “Girl,” she whispered sharply through the phone. “I think I’m in love.”
I screamed. “What?!”
On the other end, Santana’s giggles were hushed as she tried not to be loud. “Girl, he’s so fun. It’s amazing how he brings my mind to such a calm, relaxing place.” Santana sighed heavily. “Just makes my spirit feel restful like I could enjoy his company every minute and not get bored. It’s so crazy.”
“Damn you are in love,” I said.
Santana giggled, “Anyway, I’ll call you back later.”
“Mmhmm, don’t lie to me young lady. You have no intention of calling me back. I know that gorgeous man is keeping you occupied.”
“Look who’s talking,” Santana said.
I smiled wide. “Whatever, bye!”
I disconnected the call and bit my lip, my mind traveling to Julian. Last night, I wondered where he was going that was so important that he put off what would’ve been another night of amazing sex. No matter how often I tried to remind myself, Julian didn’t belong to me, I couldn’t help wanting to be with him daily. I was candid with myself. I’d allowed myself to fall for a man that could possibly destroy me, and I had no one to blame.
After applying my mascara, I took a look at my appearance, happy with my simple ensemble. I slid my feet into my two-inch heels and sprayed myself with a mist of country apple fragrance before making my way to the door. I’d ordered breakfast from the room service menu and stepped out the door prepared to knock on Julian’s. I hoped he’d enjoy breakfast in bed, although I couldn’t deny I wanted that breakfast to be me.
“Thanks again,” a soft feminine voice purred.
I turned with the tray in my hand to see Lila closing the door to Julian’s suite. My throat tightened at the sight of her perfectly dressed appearance, but I tried not to show my displeasure. Urging myself to move forward, Lila smiled up at me and spoke.
“Good morning,” she said.
My smile wasn’t genuine, but I hoped she couldn’t tell it.
“Good morning,” I responded.
Lila glanced to the tray in my hand, and her brows rose. “If you’re going to Julian’s he’s in the shower, you might want to give him a minute.”
The stab of pain that flurried through my soul almost made me miss a step. I wanted to respond, but I couldn’t pry my lips apart quick enough. Instead, I nodded and returned to my suite to discard the tray. My mind whirled; tossing me like torrent winds. Is that where Julian ran off to last night? To be with Lila? She had bounced down the hallway like her morning was off to a great start. Had she been enthralled beneath Julian until sunrise? My throat was in a knot, and my heart plummeted. My breathing was labored, and I lay a hand on my chest in an effort to calm myself. Pulling out my cell phone, I called for a chauffeur and quickly left Jumeirah Beach Hotel.
The hour and a half ride to Forward Kitchen wasn’t nearly as pleasant as the ride and flight with Julian. “If you’re going to Julian’s he’s in the shower, you might want to give him a minute.”
Lila’s words slammed through me on repeat. He was in the shower, no doubt washing away the night of passion he’d had with Lila. A mist of tears fogged my eyesight but I refused to let them spring forward. Wiping them vigorously, I silently scolded myself. There was a part of me that wanted to curse him out and kick his ass. But that was just my emotions getting the best of me, and foolish. Julian hadn’t promised me anything, so I had to just get over him.
But how would I when I’d fallen hopelessly in love with him? I entered Forward Kitchen on auto pilot. Lacey and Antonio cheered when I came through the door which brought a slight smile to my face. Lacey was filled with so much animation I hardly got a word in most times. With Donald’s blessing, we left the kitchen in search of a park. We ended up at Dubai’s Garden Glow which was like Christmas for the kids. The theme park held multiple attractions including a massive manmade garden of glowing Tulips of the Netherlands, a dinosaur exhibit, an animal kingdom, a glowing mushroom forest, restaurants, cafés and more. Standing at the entrance looking over a menu of the site’s attraction my cell phone rang.
“Long night?” I answered.
Julian’s voice cruised through my eardrums with a dark silkiness, and I fought a squirm. “Good morning, Bella. Last night was particularly long for reason’s you wouldn’t believe,” He said. “How’d you know? You have some cognitive powers you failed to mention?”
He was joking, but I couldn’t find a single thing to laugh about.
“No, not cognitive, by now my secret would’ve been out with you.”
“That’s good to know,” he said. “I came to your room a few minutes ago but to no avail. Are we going to Forward Kitchen this morning to get Antonio or are we waiting till later?”
I looked to Antonio and Lacey who were patiently waiting for me to get off the phone so we could enter the park.
“I’m already with him actually, and Lacey’s here with us. We decided to go to Dubai’s Garden Glow theme park.”
Julian was quiet for a moment, and I imagined his mind swirling. “Bella, I thought we were doing that together?”
“I did too, but it was a last-minute change of plans.”
“Any reason why?”
I pressed my lips thinly together, going back and forth over whether to reveal what I knew. “I saw Lila this morning on my way to your room, and she said you were showering, so I wanted to give you the space you needed. It’s not like we haven’t been connected to the hip most of this trip.” I made it my business to sound nonchalant, but my heart raced as I finished my sentence. “It’s okay. I had a chauffeur bring me over so we’ll hang out here today and I’ll see you sometime tomorrow.”
“That’s not necessary,” he said, “I’m coming over.”
“No!” I practically shouted. “I mean, it’s fine, they’re in good hands.”
“Of course, they’re in good hands, I wouldn’t insinuate otherwise.” Julian paused. “Is everything alright, Bella?”
“Fine,” I quipped. “Everything’s fine.”
“Are you sure? You’d tell me if we had a problem, right?”
I pressed my lips tight again.
“Everything’s fine, Julian. I’ll let you get to your business. Talk to you later.” I disconnected the call and dropped my phone in my purse. My heart was still rocking as I smiled down at Antonio and Lacey.
“You guys ready?” I said boasting a wide smile.
“Yes!” They both chimed.
“Come on, let’s go,” I said grabbing their hands strolling into the park.
Dubai’s Garden Glow park was a one of a kind adventure. Antonio and Lacey had the time of their lives. We didn’t get to experience the full park because it was just too large to get through it all in one day so I promised them we’d come back the next day. That brought more happiness to them, and I was pleased to be a part of their experience. At the end of the day, I took Antonio back to Forward Kitchen, and he didn’t want me to leave, so I stayed around until he finally fell asleep on my shoulder.
“I’ll take him,” Lacey offered.
Quietly, I placed Antonio in Lacey’s arms, and Antonio snuggled contently around Lacey’s neck.
“I’ll be back tomorrow, as promised,” I said.
Lacey Beamed and whispered. “Thank you, Mrs. Rose.”
I halted my steps and turned to her. “Ms. Stevens,” I whispered.
“For now,” Lacey whispered back. It was the same thing Julian had said the day before. Lacey beamed, and I offered her a smile then took my leave. On the way back to Jumeirah, I checked text messages I’d received from Santana and two voicemails; one from Fredrick and one from Julian. I deleted Fredrick’s before his voice could buzz in my ear. I didn’t care what he wanted. His ridiculous orders for me to keep him in the loop was something I had failed to do on purpose, so I was sure he was on a rampage on my voicemail. When Julian’s voice fled through me, I closed my eyes and listened.
“Bella, I’m not sure what happened this morning. I think there may be some misunderstanding between us. We should talk about it and clear the air. Call me as soon as you’re back, and I’ll come to you.”
“To delete this message press seven.” I listened to the voicemail again then pressed nine to save the message. I knew what I was doing. I needed to disconnect myself from Julian. It was now or never.
Then why did you save the message?
That little voice in the back of my head was never far away. I’d saved Julian’s message just to have a keepsake. Something to remember him by.
Why not hear him out?
The question knocked around my head even after I made it back to Jumeirah. I took a shower, fixed something to drink, and sank into the sheets of the massive bed. I’d fallen asleep but was awakened by a steady drum at my door. With everything quiet around me except for the constant knock, I lay there, on my back, staring up at the ceiling, willing him to leave. There was no point in me checking to see who was at the door. It was something I already knew. After about fifteen minutes of incessant knocking, Julian eluded his thumping for calling instead. The continuous ring of my cell phone didn’t thicken my fortitude since I’d placed him under a distinct ringtone. Jill Scott’s soft vocals sang out until the tone ended but shortly started up again. I shut my eyes tight and waited for it all to stop. After another three rings, everything was silent again, but now, I was wide awake.
I tossed and turned, more disturbed than I’d been in a long time. Finally, I drifted back to sleep. When I rose it was ten o’clock in the morning. I drug myself out of bed headed for the bathroom. Getting up this late was not in my plans. I wanted to miss Julian going back to Forward Kitchen. I stood in the bathroom brushing my teeth. What I knew for sure was, this week was the wrap-up. So, Julian would be busy making sure things were put together on all ends. Apparently, I couldn’t avoid him for the few days we had left in Dubai since I too had to notate the rest of this process for my report. However, today I would spend with Antonio and Lacey before that process began.
Surprisingly, I managed to leave Jumeirah without spotting him. I wondered if he’d given up on reaching out to me and my conflicting emotions pushed me around like a bully on the playground. I spent most of my time with Antonio and Lacey, lost in thought. I’d managed to shift my focus back to Houston and what my future held. At the end of the week, we would be headed back to the states. I had an idea of how I would get Fredrick to write me a letter of recommendation. He wouldn’t like it, but that was neither here nor there. The day didn’t end without a call from Julian. Then a text.
Good evening, Bella. When you get a minute call me. We should talk.
I reread the text a thousand times that day trying to give myself the confidence to call and have an articulate conversation with him. And I had every intention of doing just that, but I found myself procrastinating into the next day, avoiding Julian at all costs. This time when I’d made it to Forward Kitchen, Lacey and Antonio wanted to hang out with Julian. I should’ve seen that coming, but I’d hoped our fun days out would be enough to occupy them.
“Can we?” Lacey beamed. “I’d love to see Mr. Rose outside of the kitchen.”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah!” Antonio shouted.
I pursed my lips. “Sure, let’s eat first then I’ll take you over there.”
“Yes!” Lacey jumped and grabbed Antonio’s hands. They ran over to the line and grabbed a tray as I fidgeted nervously.
Chapter Twenty Three
Julian
She was avoiding me and doing a really good job at it. I sighed and ended the call I made for what felt like the one-hundredth time. On Desiree’s voicemail, she asked me to leave a message and would promptly return my call. But the sun had set and rose without so much as a text. I was frustrated. Wanting a woman so bad that being ignored by her felt crushing at every minute. It was unnatural for me. What was most disturbing is I didn’t know what I had done to warrant the silence. I played around with a bunch of maybes, which never got me anywhere, so I went about my frustrating day. Business had to go on, so I pushed Desiree to the back of my mind. But as soon as I was in the middle of grabbing a few shots, or checking wardrobe, she’d be there haunting me again.
“Last shots!” Kelsey yelled. “Make it count!”
I stood to the side and watched the photographer work all his angles. Many times, I wanted to jump when I saw a shot I felt was detrimental to get, but I stayed to the side and let him work.
“Turn, turn!” the photographer shouted. “Yes, hold it!” Flashes from his camera lit up the room. “That’s it!” The photographer approached me with a broad smile.
“Wait till you see these last few,” he said nodding his head up and down. Handclaps pulled my attention away from him.
“Mr. Rose!” Lacey waved with a bright smile on her face. Surprised, I traipsed to her.
“Hey kid, what brings you here to see me?” I glanced from her to Desiree, who clutched Antonio’s hand in a fist.
“We thought you would be with Ms. Steven’s, but she said you were busy finalizing everything.”
My gaze traveled to Desiree. “Did she now?” I drawled. Our eyes locked and she smiled gracefully.
“Yes, I did, I knew you were busy with things.”
“I’m never too busy that I can’t take a call,” I said. “I would’ve made time.” I took my eyes away from her. “But you’re here now, right?”
“Right!” Lacey beamed.
“Right!” Antonio mimicked.
“Have you guys had anything to eat?”
Lacey shook her head adamantly. “We ate before coming over.”
A grin spread across my face. “What about dessert?”
Antonio and Lacey’s eyes arched.
“Dessert!” Antonio yelled, and I laughed.
“Follow me,” I said leaving for the eatery station we had set up. “What would you like, brownies, ice cream, cupcakes?”
“So many choices,” Lacey said. Desiree’s laugh sent a ripple crashing through me. It had only been a few days since I’d heard her voice, but it felt like eternity.
“Lacey take Antonio over to a table, and you guys enjoy some dessert,” I said my eyes lingering on Desiree. I didn’t need to tell Lacey twice. She was gone before I could finish my sentence.
Desiree shifted her weight from one foot to the other, her eyes landing everywhere but me.
“How are you?” I asked.
Finally, she engaged me. “I’m good, how about yourself?”
“I could be better.”
Her eyes traveled up then down then back up again. “You look good,” she said with a shrug of her shoulders. “But then, you always do.” Desiree offered a languid smile. She was nervous, and I was about to find out why.
“Did I do something wrong?”
Her hand trailed up her neck then she dropped it. “No, why would you ask that?”
“Forgive me if I’m stepping out of line but, you’re running from me, Desiree and I want to know why.” She swallowed visibly.
“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
“I think you do.” I glided closer to her. “I won’t let you run, Desiree.” I had a notion of tossing her over my shoulder and leaving the room, but I held my animal instincts to a minimum. Desiree sighed.
“I’m not running from anything.”
Her defiance was telling. “What is this about? At least tell me that much so I’ll know why you’ve been avoiding me.”
She opened her mouth to speak but couldn’t find the words. I watched her intently; hell bent on getting the truth out of her.
“Excuse me, am I interrupting something?” Lila entered our silent fight and glided to my side. Desiree’s features change, her beautiful face going rigid then unerringly masked.
“What can I help you with, Lila?”
“Just wondering if I can catch a ride back to the states. You aren’t taking a commercial fli
ght, are you?”
“No.”
“I didn’t think so. I don’t have a round trip ticket; I didn’t think you’d mind since we’ve flown together before.” Lila smiled up at me.
“If you’ll excuse me, I’m going to check on our kids.” Desiree walked away before I could stop her. She flew across the room in record speed. There was no doubt that something was up and if I had to lock her in a room until she spilled it, I would. Glancing back to Lila I spoke.
“You’ll have a ticket waiting for you at the gate,” I said, “I’ve got other plans.” As I spoke, I kept my sights on Desiree.
“Oh, okay,” Lila said.
“I could hear the disappointment in Lila’s voice. “Lila did you see Desiree Monday morning?”
This time I brought my focus to Lila.
“Yes, she was on her way to your suite with a tray in her hand.”
“A tray?”
“Yeah, I think she was bringing you breakfast, it smelled fabulous.”
“Breakfast huh,” I said.
“Yeah, but I told her she might want to give you a minute because you were in the shower, so she went back to her room.”
That was it. I was certain of it. Desiree had mentioned the same thing that morning, but I’d pushed it to the back of my mind thinking nothing of it.
“Excuse me,” I left Lila going straight to Desiree. “Can I talk to you for a minute,” I asked now standing next to her.
“Lacey, keep an eye on Antonio, will you?” Desiree asked.
“Sure thing, Ms. Stevens.”
“Thank you, Lacey,” I said. We left the open area and traveled to a narrow hallway, where I pulled her into a quiet corner and interlaced our fingers. “I miss you.”
A small smile cruised across her lips. “I miss you, too,” she confessed.
“Why are you hiding from me?” I could always tell when Desiree was nervous because she’d finger her hair and fidget much like she was doing now. “Hey,” I reached out to her wanting to connect with those beautiful brown eyes. “I want you always to tell me what’s going on in that lovely brain of yours.”
Only If You Dare (Falling For A Rose Book 3) Page 15