“But don’t you think — ” Kate began.
“Dolly, I think that Sally’s right,” Maggie said. “We want everyone to be as safe as possible until the cops catch Luke.”
“What do you think, Blake?” Kate asked.
“I want you to be safe, but I also want you to feel comfortable with whatever we decide to do. If you’d feel better, maybe Sally could stay with you and I could be here for Maggie.” Blake took a drink of lemonade, hoping that Kate would let him stay with her. Getting up this morning and finding her gone with only a note was just about too much for him to handle. He wanted to be with her as much as possible.
“I guess it’ll be okay.” Kate took a bite of green beans. “I guess we need to do something until Luke is caught.”
• • •
Kate didn’t want the girls to leave. Blake couldn’t wait for them to go. He breathed a sigh of relief when he heard Erin say, “We’ll go do that first thing this weekend” and then shut the door.
“It sounds like fun,” Blake said from his seat on the edge of the couch.
“Yeah, we haven’t shopped together for a long time. I think I might try to get something new. Something I’ve never — ” Kate paused to look at Blake. “What’s the matter?”
“Nothing.” Blake couldn’t stand it anymore. “Darlin’.” He walked to her. “I … I’m — ”
“What is it?”
Blake looked into Kate’s eyes. He searched for fear or any sign that would tell him not to do what he so wanted to do. He saw nothing that would discourage him. But he hadn’t done it yet.
He gently put his hands on Kate’s shoulders and kept searching. His hands skimmed her arms and traveled to her waist. He pulled her body close to his and was glad when what he saw in her eyes had nothing to do with fear.
“Can I kiss you?”
Kate nodded.
Blake didn’t wait. He lips met hers with all the urgency he felt. He felt like if he didn’t hold her and touch her, he’d explode. He wrapped one arm around her waist. While his other hand made soft circles on her face and traveled through her hair, his lips explored. He made himself go slow. Made himself be patient.
Kate was lost in his kiss the second his lips touched hers. The heat from his tongue as it laced the edge of her mouth curled and shot through her body. Softening her mouth for him, she invited him to deepen the kiss. She pulled him in with her hands as they closed around his face.
He felt her surrender against him and he asked for more. He couldn’t help himself. He needed her, loved her. The hand in her hair moved to her waist and he lifted her against him. Their bodies met in the perfect places. Falling slowly to his knees he wrapped Kate’s legs around him and lay her gently on the floor. The kiss became more urgent. His hands begged for more as they moved up her body. He felt her arch as he filled his hands with her breasts. Need so strong it left him breathless as it slammed through his body.
Kate tightened her legs around him. She moaned against his touch. She wanted him. She wanted all he would offer. She could feel her tears on her cheeks as she moved her mouth with his.
“Blake, please,” she murmured against his lips and pulled him to her with her hands.
Blake looked into her eyes. He was ready to do what her body was begging. But then he saw her tears. “Jesus, Kate. I’m sorry. Damn it.” Blake stood and pulled Kate with him into his arms.
“Blake what are you — ?” Kate couldn’t understand the anger in Blake’s eyes. She couldn’t get her body to relax. She didn’t want to. She felt wonderful and warm.
“Ssshh. Don’t talk.” Blake carried her to her room and laid her on her bed. Gathering a blanket from beneath her feet he spread it across her. “I’m sorry, Darlin’. I didn’t mean to.”
“Blake?”
“Just sleep, Darlin’,” Blake said as he turned out the light and cursed himself. I should have known I couldn’t just kiss her without taking it too far. Damn it. How could I have been so stupid, Blake thought to himself as he sat on the couch looking into the hours of another sleepless night.
CHAPTER 20
The girls were there every night when Kate came home from work like they said they’d be. They’d eat dinner, laugh and chat until Kate had to go to bed. And Blake would scowl or be candy cane sweet.
It was driving Kate crazy.
She’d tried to talk to him about it, but he just said nothing was the matter and wouldn’t say another word. So she figured going shopping with the girls would be fun.
“Blake, are you sure you don’t care if I go shopping with the girls?” Kate asked trying to get a rise or something out of Blake.
“No. I don’t care. But will you take my cell phone so you can call if you need anything?”
“Yes,” Kate said as she picked up the phone. “Do you want to come?”
“No.” Blake didn’t even look up from reading the newspaper. He had no idea what it said. It could have been written in French and he wouldn’t have known. He was glad a new one came every day because when Kate left for work, it was a joy to rip it to shreds and throw it away. He’d been dreading the weekend, knowing that Kate would be home for two days straight and that he’d have to deal with her, smell her scent, hear her laugh. He was going mad or maybe he was already there. He didn’t know.
“Okay. Well, bye. Be back soon.” Kate looked at him. His head was bent over the paper in his hand. His behavior confused her. She didn’t know what she’d done wrong or even if she’d had done anything at all. I’ll find out tonight, Kate thought as she got into the car with Erin, Nichole and Ranae.
“So tell me again what we’re doing,” Nichole said as she pulled out of the drive.
“We’re going shopping for silly shit,” replied Erin.
“Like what?” Nichole asked in a wary voice.
“Edible underwear,” Erin laughed.
Nichole made a horrible face.
“The deal is this. You have to find the goofiest, silliest thing to buy. We buy butt loads of it. Then we come back here and use it all.” Erin rolled her excited eyes at Ranae.
“I don’t really know about this,” Nichole said still not convinced.
“Oh. Come on, it’s fun,” Ranae encouraged. “One time Kate and I found these crazy leopard skin pantyhose. They were so outrageous. We wore them to a ’70s party. It was great!”
“Yeah, and nobody really sees you anyway,” Erin insisted. “I had purple eyebrows once. I wonder if I can have orange or green this time,” she said more to herself than anyone.
“Really. We don’t know anyone here. You’re in Oregon, not California. You won’t see these people again. Besides, we don’t get anything that’s permanent,” Kate added.
“Okay,” Nichole agreed.
“Damn straight. Glow in the dark toe nail polish for her!” Erin raved.
Nichole just rolled her eyes. The girls chattered non-stop all the way to the shops. Kate, however, was mostly silent, but she did laugh when Ranae had Erin fired up over hair clips not being silly enough — even though they required batteries and played songs.
“Let’s go into that shop that has the edible underwear first,” Erin said as they got out of the car and howled as she saw the stricken look on Nichole’s face.
“What?” Nichole screeched. “I’m not — ”
“You are too. You said you would. Sheeesh. You’d think out of all of us you would be the most adept at this kind of thing. We live in the damn sticks after all — you live in L.A.,” Erin argued.
“Fine. Fine. But I am not buying any flavored underwear.” Nichole decided.
“If you’re going to be a chicken shit about it, I’ll get you some myself. Cherry is really good!” Erin giggled all the way to the store’s entrance.
“The NOT-y Store” flashed neon in the
shop’s window. Walking between the long ropes of glittering beads that covered the entrance, the girls laughed at the small bright signs posted along the walls.
“Your mother’s NOT here.” Erin pointed and laughed at the sign.
“I like this one.” Ranae motioned toward one that read: If you’re NOT 21 don’t even bother.
Nichole laughed. “It’s like Halloween all the time.”
Wigs, fingernails, lipstick and goofy lotions were there by the bag full. Erin of course went straight for the body paint. Ranae went to see about eyelashes and flashy nail polish. Kate wasn’t particularly interested in anything really, but decided she wouldn’t mind finding a feather boa. That might be fun.
Meanwhile, Nichole was trying to disappear into the corner near the stuffed people who were supposed to look like famous stars. There was everything from Sponge Bob Square Pants to Cartman from South Park.
“Erin loves this kind of stuff. She won’t take no for an answer. But try to get her to do something she doesn’t want to do and, well you know how she is,” Kate said trying to set Nichole at ease.
“I know. I just like giving her grief. She’s nuts.” Nichole reached up and pulled down a little guy with a red sweatshirt. “Hey, this is Kenny from South Park. Remember, when we would have South Park-a-thons?”
“Yeah, that show was a real craze. I wonder if anyone on campus still eats popcorn and stays up all night watching it.” Kate replied.
“Who was Erin’s friend who used to sound just like Cartman?” Nichole asked.
“God, who knows. But he was really funny.”
“Do you think me buying Kenny is silly enough for Erin?”
“I’m sure she’ll be over any minute to grill you about what you’re buying. Save it and we’ll ask her,” Kate added.
“Yeah.” Nichole paused. “What’s the matter, Kate?”
“Nothing. Why?”
“Because you seem sad. I just wanted to know if you’re okay.”
“I guess I am,” Kate said and smiled as Ranae and Erin walked up. “I just don’t know what to do about Blake.”
“Why? What happened?” Erin asked as she smelled a bottle of massage oil.
“The other night after you guys left, he kissed me.”
“Well, that’s good right?” Ranae asked.
“I mean really kissed me. Not a peck on the cheek kind of thing. And I think I upset him.”
“What do you mean?” Nichole wrapped her arms around her Kenny doll.
“I was crying.”
“What the hell? Why? Did he hurt you?” Erin practically shouted.
“No. No.” Kate smiled. “He didn’t hurt me. I was crying because I felt normal. Not scared at all. I tried to talk to him about it, but he won’t discuss it with me.”
“Do you think he’s mad?” Ranae picked up an incense wand, smelled it and put it back.
“About what? That’s the thing. I don’t know. I hope not.”
“I know what you need to do.” Erin smiled.
“What?” The girls asked all looking at Erin.
“You guys just need to strip down and have some hot damn sex,” Erin said.
“I don’t really think that’s going to solve our problem.” Kate picked up a keychain that read, My Other Car Is a Rolls.
“Why not? Sounds like you guys just need to get back in the saddle.” Erin wiggled her fingers in the air.
“Kinda difficult for us to get back in a saddle we’ve never been in,” Kate replied.
“What the hell are you talking about? Are you telling me you and Blake have never ever had sex?”
“You don’t have to yell. I’m sure the people in this store don’t care about my sex life. And yes. That’s what I am saying.” Kate’s lips twitched. She knew Erin was about to croak.
“How come I never knew that? I thought you had.” Erin jammed her finger a Kate.
“I knew,” Ranae stated.
Erin’s face looked as if she had just been sabotaged. Her gaze raced to Nichole.
“I didn’t know,” Nichole said as fast as she could manage. But Nichole did know. She’d been involved in the should-I-have-sex-with-Blake discussion years ago.
“Oh. Well, I guess it pays to be a roommate,” Erin sassed. “But why the hell haven’t you?”
“Rodeo was always more important.”
“Well there’s no rodeo now, is there?” Erin pointed out.
“No, there isn’t.” Kate looked at her tennis shoe covered feet.
“Ah, hell, Kate I didn’t mean that. I’m sorry.” Erin grabbed a hold of Kate’s hand. “I just meant that there’s no reason now why you shouldn’t have sex with Blake.”
“I know.” Kate squeezed Erin’s hand. “I’ll think about it.”
“Good.” Erin sounded like she felt like a jerk about the whole conversation.
Kate didn’t want Erin to feel terrible. She herself wasn’t feeling bad, exactly. She just didn’t know what to do where Blake was concerned. Having sex might not be that bad of an idea. He was the only one she’d ever wanted anyway. If talking to Blake later that evening didn’t work, maybe she’d try the sex idea.
“We should get back to shopping,” Ranae said. “It looks like Nichole has one of her choices.”
“Hmmm,” Erin said eyeing Kenny.
“Is this silly enough to meet the silly shopping standards?” Nichole asked.
“No, but if you really want it, I’ll buy you some cool ass, hot pink hair jelly to make up for it.”
“No,” Nichole replied as she stuffed the Kenny doll back onto the shelf. “I guess I’ll find something else. I really don’t want hot pink hair.”
“Chicken!” Erin turned to Kate and said, “Now let’s get to shopping before all the good silly shit’s gone. We have to get eye glitter next.” She trotted off down another aisle smelling and testing as she went.
“Well, I guess we had better get going,” Kate said.
“You know, I think I’ll get some of those edible undies for my sister. Grape’s her favorite flavor.” Nichole giggled.
By the time the girls got back to the car after shopping and eating lunch, they’d argued and traded and traded back their silly shopping loot. Along with her feather boa, Kate bought some fake eyelashes. She always did. Her own were practically nonexistent. Besides she liked to pretend she was Elizabeth Taylor.
Pretty quick the girls were trying out their toe polish, nail art, glitter pens, long dangling earrings and a tinted face cream. It soon cluttered every inch of Nichole’s backseat.
“You guys be careful with that. This is a rental.” Nichole looked in the rearview mirror with a worried face.
“I can’t wear that. It’ll turn my hair green,” Ranae yelled as Erin tried to smear hair jelly into her hair.
“Well the damn stuff won’t show up on my brown hair — so we have to try it.”
“Absolutely no way!” Ranae pushed Erin out of the way.
“Chicken ass. I’ll ask Nichole,” Erin said as she got out of the car at Kate’s place.
“No,” Nichole said even before Erin asked and shut the door on her car.
Erin turned to Kate. Kate could feel her examining the color of her hair as they walked up the sidewalk. But before Erin could ask, Kate saw it.
Lying beautiful and deadly against the green moss on the stone walk was a long stemmed red rose. The sight of it brought back that night in a flash. She could feel the thorns tearing her skin. She could hear Luke’s evil voice as he promised his worst. She could smell the sweet rose turn rotten with his breath. She could see the petals drift from his fingers like blood dripping from her veins.
As if in a trance, Kate picked up the note beside the rose and read the message. I have found you, you bitch. Di
d you really think you could hide from me? Our time is close. And then your friends will soon join you. Kate heard his rasping voice say the words, felt the memory of all the pain and then slipped silently to the ground.
She didn’t feel the three girls try to catch her. She didn’t hear their screams for Blake or his swearing as he raced up the walk with Sally and the police.
CHAPTER 21
“I didn’t really mean for you to see it, darlin’,” Blake said as he tucked a strand of Kate’s hair behind her ear. “I was definitely going to tell you about it, but I didn’t want you to really see it. We left it there for the police to get evidence and pictures and stuff.” Blake berated himself for his stupidity. He’d been wandering around Kate’s house feeling sorry for himself, when he got a call from Sally saying that there was some activity outside the door. By the time he got outside, there was no one to be seen. He didn’t even read the note before he took off in the direction Sally said the guy went. But he didn’t find anyone. There weren’t even any tracks to be certain about.
“That’s okay,” Kate said as she sipped her water. “I just can’t believe I passed out.”
Blake knew his heart would never beat the same. Seeing Kate lying limp on the ground was more than it could take. “I can. You’ve been overloaded with school and entertaining the girls … and me … maybe we shouldn’t have come.”
“What do you mean? Of course you should have. Besides I love teaching. Having you and the girls here is not an overload. And I enjoy entertaining you. I’ll just be sad when you have to go back.” Kate set her water on her nightstand.
“The girls can’t stay very much longer, but I’m not going back.” Blake sat on the edge of Kate’s bed.
“Not going back? Why not? Leona and Jack can’t run the ranch without you.” Kate looked up, surprised.
“Casey Hilton is running things.”
“Casey? Really.” Kate could remember little Casey running after Blake like a puppy wanting to do everything Blake did. Time really flies I guess, she thought. “But you can go back, you know.”
The Wanting Heart Page 15