by Marie James
“I had some suspicions. He’s done some questionable things. But once again I ignored them.” I shake my head as a tear rolls down my cheek.
“You’ll be ok. I don’t think he’ll call again. I lit into him pretty good.” She wipes the tear from my face and takes a step back.
“Yeah, I heard.” I walk to the kitchen and grab my purse off of the breakfast bar and make sure I have the card with Detective Perez’s number and address on it.
“Do you want us to come with you?” Josie asks with a hopeful look on her face.
“Can you drive me?” I look at Josie, knowing she’ll jump at the chance to run into Kaleb again, and I know she’s the least likely of the two to grill me for more details before I’m ready to give them.
“Sure.” She grabs her cell phone and puts her jacket on. “Which precinct is it?”
I glance down at the card in my hand. “The one over on Industrial.”
We head out to my car and I hand her the keys. The ride to the police station is silent. By the time we make it there I’ve all but chewed a hole through my bottom lip, nerves controlling my nibbling.
We trudge to the front entrance of the police station, our shoes crunching over the snow and I let my mind wander, wondering if Ian had planned on taking me somewhere tropical this week. Sure would’ve been much better than dealing with this shit. I curse his name again, but I’m still unable to bring myself to wishing I’d never met him, knowing he’s changed my life.
“Series of heartbreaks.” I mutter under my breath channeling my late Granny Bennett. I’m hoping that the evening doesn’t end with me in a jail cell, because that would be a whole other kind of heartbreak.
***
It only takes minutes before the armed woman at the front desk leads me into an office down a long hallway. It’s so much better than an interrogation room, and I take a seat across from a cluttered desk. There are no personal effects in the office, and the windows are covered with closed blinds. It makes me feel isolated and on edge. Even when Detective Perez came in with a smile on his face, my nerves are not set at ease.
I knew before I came here I’d tell one hundred percent of the truth, that even my love for Ian wouldn’t protect him from his crimes. I didn’t have that in me. It’d break my heart to have to do it; I’d take no pride in telling the police about my knowledge of his involvement with the drugs, but I won’t stand behind a criminal either.
I do inwardly hope that if he’s arrested that he’ll not only understand that I had to do what was right, but selfishly I also hoped that I’d not suffer consequences of his actions.
I’ll tell the truth even if I lose my job because I’ll undoubtedly be dragged through the mud for being his ‘girlfriend’ and a journalist. There’s the chance that I’m more of a story behind all of this than Ian himself.
“Thank you for coming on such short notice, Ms. Bennett.” Detective Perez takes a seat behind his desk and shuffles a few papers.
“Lorali, please, Detective Perez.” I say, hoping that things would be easier on me if he called me by my first name.
“In that case please call me, Kaleb. Detective Perez was my father.” He gives me a quick smile. “I was honestly a little shocked that you had an idea of why I went to your apartment today. Can I ask why you think you’re here?”
I wring my hands together. Here goes nothing. “I’m sure it’s about the drugs.” He tilts his head at me, more than a little perplexed. “And Ian Hale’s involvement.”
He’s not able to hide the look of shock on his face. “Ian Hale? Please explain, Lorali.”
“Am I in any trouble?” I need to know even though it’ll change nothing. I’m willing to except whatever punishment may be coming from not informing the police of my suspicions.
“Not at all. You’re here because we saw you on some video and I’ve a few questions about it. Why would you think you were in trouble?” He’s leaning on his desk, obviously uncomfortable with where we’re heading.
Video? What kind of damn video? “Well, because I didn’t report Ian for the drugs.” I hang my head, full of shame. Fuck! My parents raised me better than this!
“Are you telling me you saw Ian Hale with drugs?” Kaleb asks in a low voice.
“I want to be one hundred percent truthful with you.” I look up at him.
“I’d appreciate that.” He sits up in his chair; pen in hand ready to take notes about what I’m about to say.
“Want me to start from the beginning?” He nods; I sigh. “The first time I ever laid eyes on Ian was at the Happy Suds Laundromat. I was washing clothes and he came in and went straight to the back to the office. He was in there a few minutes, and then he came out and left.”
“Did you speak to him?” Kaleb asks.
“I literally ran into him, dropped some fabric softener on his shoes. He told me not to worry about it and he got in his car and left.” I explain, my mind wandering back to that night.
“This is the interaction we saw on the video we pulled from the laundromat.” He informs me. “Did he have drugs with him then?”
“He didn’t have anything in his hands, but I don’t know what he had in his pockets.” I explain. Surely he saw that on the video.
“So why do you think Ian has any involvement with drugs? You’ve seen him since then?” The look on his face tells me he’s curious and he doesn’t seem to be working an angle.
“Yes.” This is going to be embarrassing if I tell him in full detail about our next meeting. A chill runs up my spine as I recall the moments we shared in that dark hallway. “I work for The Courier as a columnist for the Lifestyle section. I saw him again at the benefit for Safe House last month. It was his event and I was reviewing it for work.”
He’s only looking at me waiting for me to continue. “He…he recognized me from the laundromat.” I shift my eyes down. “We had a…conversation.”
“What did you guys talk about?” His face is giving nothing away.
He had to ask didn’t he? “Umm.” Just get it over with Lorali! “We discussed the merits of throwing big parties for rich people to flaunt their money. Then we…we met back up later in the corridor near the bathrooms.”
“What did you guys talk about then?” I keep my head down, hoping he can’t see my blush, but knowing he’s a good enough cop that it will not go unnoticed.
“We didn’t really talk.” I slowly draw my gaze up to meet his taking in the slight smirk on his lips.
“So you had sex with Ian Hale in the hallway?” He begins to write something down on his notepad.
“NO! God no! We didn’t have sex. He had to go give a speech. He walked away and I left.” My hands are shaking in my lap.
“You walked away from Ian Hale?” Why do I get the feeling that he’s well aware of Ian’s reputation?
Ugh! Now he thinks I’m just one of his skanks.
“Yes. He then sent me an invitation for a date. I accepted.” His smile is full blown and I feel like he’s mocking me.
“I don’t see the humor you’re obviously feeling.” I seethe, my anger rising.
“Sorry,” he says and clears his throat. His face returning to indifference. “Lorali, when did you see him with drugs?”
“I was with him when he went to an apartment and came out with a black duffle bag. He then went into the laundromat with the bag and left without it.” I explained, hoping it made more sense to him than it did to me.
“And you saw drugs in the bag?”
“No.” Crap….am I going to ruin him over speculation?
“So I don’t understand. You’re telling me Ian Hale is involved with drugs but you never saw drugs?” Kaleb is looking at me with a look of confusion on his face.
“I drove by the laundromat on Friday after work. It’s on my way home. The whole situation didn’t sit right with me so I stopped and watched for a bit.” I’m almost in tears remembering how devastated those few minutes had left me. “I saw the table with all of the drugs on it.
The bag Ian took in there was on that table.”
He looks at me and I’m unable to decipher what’s going on in his mind. He puts his pen down and leans back in his chair. Before he can speak his phone rings.
“Perez,” he says in to the receiver. He listens to the other person talking for a minute. “That’s actually perfect timing. Yes, send him in.”
He stands behind his desk as the door opens. I don’t even bother to look back, knowing it’s something to do with police work. I take the opportunity to attempt to calm my nerves.
“Lorali?” The sound of his sultry voice causes me to shiver. I raise my eyes to him and I can see Kaleb come from around his desk in my periphery. I’m unable to speak and I begin to shake.
What the hell is he doing here? Oh God! He’s paid off the police. I watch as Ian stretches out his hand and shakes with Kaleb. Kaleb leans in speaks softly to him. “You have a fucking mess to clean up here, man.” He claps him on the shoulder and makes for the door. He turns to me with a sad expression on his face. “Lorali, I understand what you think you saw, but you need to give him a chance to explain.”
“You’re leaving?” I know he can hear the tremble in my voice.
“I’ll be right outside.” He doesn’t say another word and the door closes with a soft click behind him.
Ian is standing across the room, his hands down by his side, thumbs stroking the tips of middle and forefinger, like he’s itching to touch me and doing his best to refrain.
“Wh…what are you doing here? How did you know I was here?” I want to overt my eyes, a wave of shame crashing through my body along with a wave of fear. Is he going to threaten me for telling the police the truth?
“I spoke with Alexa earlier. She said you were heading here to speak with the narcotics detective.” He shifts his weight on his feet but doesn’t come closer to me.
I’m unable to speak, the fear of not knowing what’s going to happen has left me paralyzed.
He continues. “She said I was a drug dealer and that’s why you called things off between us.” I can tell by the cadence of his voice he’s upset, not angry. “Why didn’t you ask me?”
I let out a quick huff. “I didn’t want to believe it was true.” I still can’t make eye contact with him.
“That’s the thing, Lorali. It isn’t true.” My eyes shoot up to his, small smile on his lips.
“Is this the part where you try to convince me I didn’t see what I saw? Try to convince me to recant? Threaten me if I don’t?” I keep my eye contact, hoping he can see in my eyes that no threat will keep me from telling the truth.
He rushes to me and sits in the seat beside me and reaches for my hands. I push back so quickly, unsure of what his intentions are that I almost topple my chair backwards.
“Baby?” I can see the look of bewilderment in his eyes. “Do you really see me as that type of person? You’re terrified of me. What have I done to make you afraid of me?”
I keep my eyes down, my body trembling.
“Will you let me explain? I’ll answer any question you have.” I chance a look at him and his expression is hopeful and it helps to calm my nerves a bit. Still unable to trust my voice, I nod my head.
“I was at the laundromat the first time we met, as a favor to a woman who means the world to me.” I think back to the hand that caressed his face so lovingly at the apartment and cringe, not wanting to even think about him near another woman.
“Her grandson had gotten mixed up with the wrong crowd and they were trying to get him to sell drugs. I went there because the owner of that place, Miguel Cruz, was the one running the drugs. Getting his other dealers to put pressure on Sean to sell drugs.” I look up at him.
“Grandson? The lady from the apartment?” He nods. “Who’s she to you?”
A huge smile lights up his face. “Her name is Maria.” The woman he took a call from the morning after I stayed with him after the club opening. “She was my nanny growing up.”
Nanny? I give him a small smile because I can see his eyes light up when he talks about her.
“Anyways. I told him he needed to stay away from the boy. I thought a show of force would have him back down and leave Sean alone, but he didn’t. Maria called and said Sean came to her, scared for his life. Miguel’s guys were threatening him and gave him a bag of dope and told him to sell it, or else.”
The tone of his voice and the look on his face makes me believe that he’s telling me the truth. He was absolutely right. I should’ve questioned him. My lack of questions, completely out of the norm for a good journalist, has caused me to break my own heart. I’m on the verge of sobs when he continues.
“I let Kaleb know about the situation from day one. He said Miguel Cruz was already on the radar, but they had a few things that needed to line up before they could move on him.” I stare at him in shock. So that’s the connection he has with the police, an informant not a criminal trying to buy his freedom. “I never should’ve gone back to him with that bag from her apartment, but I felt like they were taking too long and I didn’t want something to happen to Sean while we were waiting for the police to sort through the red tape.”
“You could’ve gotten hurt.” I reach out and grab his hands in mine, the all too familiar spark running between us.
“I know. I just wasn’t thinking. Maria’s like a mother to me. I’ve begged her for years to move out of that damn apartment. She’s always refused. I had it refurbished to make it more comfortable, but I could do nothing about the surrounding neighborhood.” He explains further.
That explains why the small complex she lives in is in such better shape than those around it. Ian has attempted to make it more comfortable for her and her family.
“When she told me they were threatening her and Sean, I lost it. I never should’ve gone. I almost compromised the entire situation. That’s why I planned the away trip for us.” He looks at me regretfully and wipes the tears away from my face. “I didn’t want to be around when it went down.”
“I should’ve said something. I should’ve asked what was going on, but I was afraid of the answers. I was hoping I was wrong.” I lean into his hand when he caresses my cheek. “And I was, but now I’ve ruined everything.” I hang my head unable to look at him.
He gently places his hands under my chin, slowly lifting my face to him. I keep my eyes closed. “Lorali, nothing is ruined.”
My eyes open in astonishment. “What? I accused you of being a drug dealer! I broke up with you and told the police you sell drugs!”
“Baby, the police know I don’t sell drugs. Kaleb and I play poker together. We’ve been friends for years.” His hand is resting on my neck, thumb stroking my cheek.
Why is he being so understanding? I could’ve ruined him! “You’re not mad that I didn’t trust you?”
“I’m not happy, but I’m more upset that I’ve given you any reason to doubt me. Why didn’t you ask?” His eyes are pleading with mine.
I can’t take my eyes from him and I know how hard it’s going to be to put my thoughts into words. “Maybe if I explain my background a little better you’ll understand why. I had a boyfriend in high school.” I try to swallow; my mouth and throat are dry. “One day the campus police show up with a K9, and they pull drugs out of Seth’s backpack. They brought me in and questioned me for hours, dumbfounded that I had no idea he was selling drugs.” I cry and my body shudders, reliving the trauma from that day.
“Oh, baby!” He brings his head in and kisses my forehead.
“When I got home, I dug deep and started questioning things I’d seen him do. Then it hit me like a brick that had I paid more attention to his actions rather than being so love struck over him I could’ve easily seen the signs that he was up to no good.” I pull my head back to look in his eyes. “I told myself I’d never be fooled by another man. I went into journalism so I’d never be in a situation like that again, but then you came along.” I smile up at him, he returns the smile.
“You’re so handsome and enigmatic. Something would happen that made me question you, but then you’d smile and shower me with so much attention that I couldn’t associate that person with a man that would have involvement in drugs. When I drove by the laundromat during the raid and saw the bag you got from Maria on the table, it all came crashing down around me.” The tears are in full swing now. “I couldn’t believe what I was seeing and I knew I couldn’t continue to live with my head in the sand. I was terrified I’d be crucified in the media when they finally got around to arresting you. I wanted to avoid the humiliation.”
I attempt to hang my head in shame, but his hand holding my jaw doesn’t allow for movement. I opt to close my eyes instead, unable to look at him.
“I ruined us before we even really got started,” I say as a deep sob wracks my body.
“Baby?” I don’t respond. “ Lorali?” He tugs on my chin. “Look at me.” I bring my eyes to his, unable to resist his gentle command. “Nothing is ruined. It’s just been a miscommunication.”
I gasp. “You still want me, even after all of this?”
“Want you? Baby, I fucking love you. I’m not going anywhere!” His smile is contagious.
“Really?” I search his eyes, finding no doubt what so ever. I reach my hand up and lovingly stroke his face. The idea that I almost lost this man because of issues I had in the past almost gut me. “I’m so sorry, Ian. I was so afraid of getting hurt again, I acted on impulse.”
He nods and leans his mouth in for a kiss. I meet him half way, our mouths and tongues tangling with each others, the air around us charging with sexual need. I moan into his mouth, trying to take the kiss as deep as I can.
He breaks the kiss and rests his forehead against mine. He chuckles. “I don’t think Kaleb would be very happy if he walks in and I’m fucking you on his desk, but my car is right outside. Will you come home with me? I want to hold you. I want to take you home and wrap myself around you and never let go.”
He looks apprehensive, like he’s unsure of what my answer will be and I’m sure it’s because I didn’t reciprocate the words he said to me.