by Marie James
I nod my head. “Yep.” I respond the P making a popping noise.
“That’s…that’s monumental, Alexa.” She’s slowly shaking her head like she can’t believe the words I’ve spoken.
“I know. But that’s not my issue, Lorali.” I hang my head and cover my face with my hands. I haven’t said the next sentence to myself, let alone someone else. I figured refusing to think about it would somehow keep it from happening and would protect my heart. “I think I’m falling for him.” I mutter into my hands.
She doesn’t respond so I raise my eyes to hers and I’m surprised to see a smile on her face. “Alexa Warner? In love? I thought I’d never see the day.” She reaches over and places a gentle hand on my arm, encouraging me to lower my hands from my face. “I think it’s wonderful. Why are you so upset?”
“Seriously?” I respond with exasperation. “Garrett doesn’t do love, Lorali. Garrett does the whole tie a girl up and then fuck her in the ass thing, not love.”
She giggles at my description of combined trysts with Garrett, but I have too much going on in my head to dissect it at the moment.
“Every time?” She asks.
“Excuse me?” I say distracted.
“That’s the only way he likes it? He’s never been gentle with you? Loving?”
I sit back further on the couch and huff. “He’s done gentle some.” I answer truthfully.
“So how do you know he doesn’t do love?”
I sigh again. She sure is dense sometimes! “We agreed to be fuck buddies not to having a relationship, Lorali.”
“Well, I guess you’ll never know unless you tell him how you feel.” She says in a matter of fact tone, sitting back on the couch mirroring me.
“I’m afraid he’ll end what we have.” I tell her.
“Would you rather fall harder now and get hurt more later though?” She has a point.
“So I just tell him?” I look into her eyes, praying I find the answer, hoping that the outcome is something I can live with, or without as the case may be.
“You tell him.” She grips my arms tighter. “You tell him soon, Alexa.”
“He stayed the night with me last night.” I inform her. “And he wants to see me tonight.”
“Tonight is perfect then.” She urges, making my decision for me.
“Tonight.” I confirm with trepidation. “Well,” I say with more happiness than I’m actually feeling. “Enough about my problems, tell me about wedding plans!”
“We haven’t really made any plans.” Lorali answers as she pours another glass of wine and tops mine off. “We just got engaged last night, but Ian did say he wants it to happen very quickly. So I have loads of planning to do in a short period of time.”
“I can help wherever you need me,” I offer.
“Ugh,” she sighs. “I think I’m going to hire a wedding planner and let them sort it out. I never really had any fantasies about what my wedding would look like.” She blushes again. “I’ve always wondered more about what my husband would be like.”
I smile at her; she is so far gone.
“Thanks God!” I exclaim.
“I knew you really didn’t want to help!” She laughs.
“But I would, and that’s the point!”
“That’s the point,” she agrees with a smile and takes another long pull on her wine. “You will be a bridesmaid though right?”
I shrug my shoulders. “So long as you don’t make me wear a mint green dress, I’ll do whatever you want me to do!”
“We are going with different shades of purple, I think.” She responds immediately.
“Thought you never gave consideration to your wedding before?” I say with a smirk.
“Purple is sort of personal to us. I figured it was the best color.” She informs me.
I hum. “I’m more of a red kind of girl,” I tell her with a wink.
We sit and chit chat for a few more hours, until the bottles of wine are gone. Lorali has to call Ian to send a car to get her home since she’s in no condition to drive. Even drunk she whispers in my ear before she leaves reminding to talk to Garrett this evening.
Chapter 25
Garrett
Just like any other time you’re looking forward to something, the day is taking forever, like father-time is making me his bitch because he knows how bad I want to see Alexa again.
I fill my day with emails, phone calls and other bits of minutia until employees finally started to arrive and I can interact with them in an attempt to push time along faster.
I pick up my cell and dial Ian’s number to fill some time in my evening. He answers just before it goes to voicemail.
“Hello?” His voice is gruff and filled with sleep.
“Hey man. You feeling alright? Did I wake you?” It’s quite unusually for him to be sleeping this early.
“No, Garret I’m fine. You just woke me up from a nap.” I can hear the rustle of sheets in the back ground and a light feminine giggle.
I have the sudden urge to hang up on him. I’d hate it if my cousin interrupted me while I was in bed with Alexa, even if we were just taking a nap. Fuck that! I wouldn’t answer the phone!
“Why are you taking a nap at five in the evening?” This is seriously out of character for him.
“Alexa had Lorali go over to her apartment and got her drunk this morning. She called me for a ride.” He chuckles. “So I gave her a ride home then gave her another ride.” I hear Lorali squeal and a mild slap against skin. “It’s only, Garrett, baby,” he says. Apparently Lorali is not too keen on Ian sharing the details of their day.
I clear my throat when they begin whispering not so quietly. “Hey man I just wanted to call and tell you congrats once again.”
“Thanks, Garrett.” Ian responds.
“I’ll let you get back to your girl.” I say quickly as I hear a low moan from Lorali.
I hear “okay” come out softly before the line goes dead.
I chuckle as I stand from my desk, leave my office, and make my way up to the bar; Johnny’s doing liquor level count. “How’s it going man?” I query as I take a seat on a stool.
“Looking good, G.” He replies and sets the clipboard down.
He normally works through any conversation we have but I can tell he has something on his mind, that’s using all of his attention. “What’s up?” I prompt.
“You know I’m not one to mix business and pleasure.” He shakes his head, starting over. “I mean it’s not mixing business and pleasure, but I was wondering about that woman that Lorali’s friend Alexa had with her the other night, Mallory.”
I take a minute to watch him and can’t help but smile. He’s never shown any attention, other than what’s required to be cordial for his job, to a woman in the bar; at least not to my knowledge.
“I don’t know anything about her, man.” I say honestly. “I’ve never met her, but I can tell Alexa you asked about her.” I suggest.
“That’d be great!” His smile’s contagious as he grabs the clip board and gets back to work.
“Hey, man. I’m not going to be here tonight. Think you can hold it down while I’m gone?” I keep the question nonchalant, even though he’ll know how much faith I’m putting in him.
“Sure, Garrett. Whatever you need, man.” He responds immediately.
“Appreciate it, Johnny. See you tomorrow. I’ve got my cell if you need me.” He nods and dives back into his work.
I stand up from the stool and make my way around the club, checking in with various people as they ready the facility for a Friday night.
At eight o’clock I’m chomping at the bit and decide to call it a night. I act on the chance that Alexa hasn’t eaten yet and swing by a local Italian restaurant, famous for shrimp scampi on angel hair pasta and grab two servings.
By nine o'clock I’m at home, food is in the warming drawer in the oven, and I’m situated on the couch with a glass of scotch, waiting not so patiently for her to arrive.
/> I turn on ESPN just for the noise. Football season is over and baseball isn’t off the ground enough for me to even pay attention to it so I have no real desire to pay attention to it anyhow.
My mind makes the decision for me when it conjures images of Alexa. I can go with this. I sit back further on the couch and close my eyes. I picture myself in the bed with her, every ounce of her delicate, milky skin on display underneath me. I gently brush her cheek with the tips of my fingers as I lean into her mouth for soft kiss.
My eyes snap open. What the fuck! Sweet nothing fantasies? Not a chance! I jump up in an attempt to rid my mind of those thoughts, shaking my hands and the tips of my fingers like a fighter about to get in the cage. I never picture passionate kissing and slow love making with a woman. I want it hard and borderline violent. So why does the image of me laying Alexa out while I honor every inch of her body have my cock raging in my pants?
As much as the alarms are going off in my head to the unorthodox feelings, my body doesn’t seem to be able to get on the same page. She has somehow gotten under my skin and has burrowed down making a place for herself in my life. Deciding to be friends with benefits is possibly either the best or the worst decision we’ve ever made!
Chapter 26
Alexa
I didn’t get the impression that Garrett and I would be leaving his apartment this evening and since my feet still hurt from my shoes last night, I opt for flats, jeans, and a simple top for tonight.
I decided to head out a little early because I just can’t stand the waiting game when it comes to Garrett. The gods of interruption have been nice to me; traffic was super light and I found a parking spot immediately after pulling into the parking garage for Garrett’s building. I look at the clock on the dash. Fuck. It’s only ten-thirty. I don’t want to look desperate but I’m not sitting in my car in a dark garage either.
I lock up and make my way into the building via the garage elevator. Thankfully, it pings immediately. I step in, press the button for the seventeenth floor, and wait less than patiently as it moves slowly to Garrett’s apartment. He may not even be here since I’m so early. If he isn’t I’ll head down to the bar on the second floor and have a drink until eleven.
Within seconds of my light knock on the door, it swings open. Garrett quickly scans my body and his smile tells me that he approves.
“I’m early,” I tell him apologetically.
“Anxious to see me, Angel?” He implores with a knowing smirk. I reach up to smack him on the shoulder, but he grabs my wrist and pulls me to his chest. “I got here early too,” he murmurs against my lips. “I’ve been waiting for you.”
That’s exactly what I’m talking about. He’s not slamming me against the wall, ripping my clothes off; he’s kissing me slowly, gently cupping my ass. Although it’s confusing me it’s also giving me hope that we may get to a more permanent place in our ‘relationship.’
Unable to just let him kiss me, I reach my hands up and grip his hair, pulling him harder against me as I try to increase the tempo of the kiss. He allows it, momentarily, kissing me back so thoroughly that I’m panting when he pulls away. I lick my lips, my eyes remaining closed.
“Are you hungry?” He asks, kissing my neck and nipping at my collar bone.
“Is that another sausage joke?” I return half-heartedly.
He laughs against my neck, the sound makes my insides quiver. “No, Angel. I grabbed dinner for us on the way home this evening.”
I open my eyes and look up at him. He sure is one beautiful man. “I could eat.” I say.
He slides his hand down my arm until his hand meets mine. Hand in hand we walk to the kitchen. He gestures for me to sit at the dining table and heads over to the stove. The open floor plan of the apartment allows me to maintain eye contact with him as he begins to retrieve the meals from a warming drawer in the lower part of the oven.
The sight of him bending over to grab the food has me squeezing my thighs together and squirming in my seat. He turns toward me with a plate in each hand and catches me staring.
“You have that look on your face, Alexa,” he informs with a smile.
“What look?” I feign innocence.
“The one that says you’re hungry for something other than food.” He raises an eyebrow at me; a challenge to deny it.
I shrug my shoulders. “Maybe.” I tell him as he sets a delicious smelling plate of shrimp scampi in front of me.
“And if I told you to get on your knees and suck me off while I eat?” Oh we’re going to play this game again? He already knows the answer.
“Then I’d hope you’d let me eat dinner after I swallow dessert.” I tell him with a smile and a wink.
He coughs to clear his throat and adjusts his cock as it visibly thickens in his slacks. “Right answer.” He replies flatly walking back to the fridge. “White or red?”
“White.” I tell him. He brings the bottle to the table and pours us both a glass before taking his seat perpendicular to me. I can’t hide the disappointment at the fact that he didn’t tell me to hit my knees.
He reads me like a book and chuckles. “In due time, Angel. Please eat. You’re going to need your energy tonight.”
Once again I find myself twitching in my seat. I do my best to eat as quickly as possible, attempting to get the human requirement over quickly so we can get to the extracurricular activities of the evening.
Garrett didn’t get the memo that we were supposed to eat quickly, so he was far from finished as I push my empty plate away. He seems to also be okay with idle chit chat as he finishes his meal and I strum my fingers on the table top.
Enough of this shit! I scoot my chair from the table and rinse my mouth out with a large sip of wine before I slide out of my chair to the floor and slink over to Garrett. He says nothing as I undo the button and zipper on his slacks. He doesn’t disappoint either. His thick shaft is ready for me when I pull him free of his clothes.
I hear his fork fall abruptly to his half empty plate when I lick him from root to tip, but he says nothing. I suck his head and even when I release him with an erotic popping noise a small grunt is all I get.
Playing hard ball I see. I take him all the way to the back of my throat and roll his balls in my hand. I’d smile at the hiss I finally pull from him if it were possible around a mouth full of cock. I feel his hand on the back of my head as I try to lift my mouth up to get a breath of air. He allows it only for a second before his push sends me back down to the base of him, my nose almost touching his stomach.
“Oh! Goddamn, Alexa. Take it deep!” He moans on a gasp.
When his grip loosens in my hair I reach up and take the base of his shaft in my hand and suction lock around him, bobbing my head up and down his length and swirling my tongue at the head on the up stroke. He grips my head again and pulls me off. Instinctively I crane my neck to try to take him back in my mouth.
He pulls my hair backwards, forcing me to look at him. “Fuck if that’s the way this ends tonight, Angel.” I lick my lips and shift my eyes back down to his engorged cock. He tugs my hair again. “I’ll be buried deep inside you when I come tonight.” He says, staring into my eyes.
I wipe the excess spit from my chin with the back of my hand and stand. “Think we can get started on that?”
As soon as the words are out of my mouth, he scoots his chair back and helps me stand. His big arm sweeps behind my ass and he lifts me up. Once my legs are wrapped around his waist he holds me with two strong hands, one under each cheek. I feel safe and secure and not just in the physical sense with Garrett. I know that’s a delusion, he’d never hurt me physically but can I trust him with my heart? I don’t even know if he wants it. The not knowing is more painful than what I may face if I tell him and he’s not receptive.
I decide then and there that I’ll tell him how I feel before I walk out of here tonight. Consequences be damned. I lose a little piece of myself every time I leave his bed and have to walk away like I’m not in
love with him. Like he hasn’t somehow, creeped into my soul and settled in my heart.
“Where are you?” He whispers against my neck before sucking and licking at it, pulling me from my thoughts.
“I’m here, with you.” I tangle my fingers in his hair and wiggle my core against his hard shaft.
We’ve made it to his bed which surprises me. The one other time that I came here to his apartment at his demand we’d barely made it to the couch. Later he took me against the wall, and then again in a shower off the main hallway, but I was never brought or invited into his room. I can’t help but wonder if this is his way of letting me in, sharing a part of himself as a way to open up to me more. The thought makes me hopeful.
He releases his grip under me and clasps my waist, allowing my legs to slide down and meet the floor. He begins shuffling out of his clothes. I just stand there and stare at him as he unwraps himself. My lip is sucked in between my teeth as a present greater than anything I’ve ever received becomes visible. His rock hard abs and muscular chest are more than any man should have. His strong, gorgeous face thrown in the mix makes it sinful. How could any woman who has ever seen him like this just walk away after one night with him? I knew I couldn’t.
Unable to resist the need to feel his skin under my fingertips, I reach up and stroke his chest, my finger tracing each and every contour and dip of his rock hard muscles. He stands stock still with his arms by his sides as my hands explore his body. I feel his muscles bunch and jump under my touch the lower I trace. His cock jumps, seeking my attention.
I let my hand wander down and sweep his lower stomach; my forearm grazes the side of his cock. A whisper of a touch. An erotically pained moan leaves his lips drawing my attention to his handsome face. His eyes are closed and his mouth is held in a tight line. I keep my eyes on him as I reach over and slide my hand up his cock in a smooth gentle glide. His eyelids flutter and his mouth opens slightly, releasing a quick puff of air, as my hand continues the ghost like stroking.
His hips buck in an attempt to encourage harder pressure from me, and in response I remove my hand. His eyes pop open at its loss and finds me watching him. I give him a sly smile as his hand reaches up and caresses my cheek; the look on his face almost stops my heart. I wish I could read minds because I’m dying to know what’s running through his head at this exact second.