by C. Luca
It dawns on me that I’m braless, and the pale fabric clings to every curve of my breasts, including my nipples. Heat warms my cheeks, and I struggle against it, not wanting him to see my embarrassment. I’d completely forgotten how thin the tops are when I’m not wearing a bra. Part of me wants to flee back to the room, but I ignore the impulse. I’m a grown woman, and I finally feel like one. I forgot a bra, so what.
“Something wrong?” Kane asks as he watches me intently.
I shake my head. “I can’t sleep.” I limp over to the armchair across from the coffee table and sofa, sitting down. Carefully, I tuck my legs underneath me so that I’m comfortable.
Kane takes one last draw from the cigarette and then leans forward and stubs it out in the small ashtray on the table.
“Why do you smoke only once in a while?” I ask curiously. I’ve noticed that most people either smoke constantly or not at all. Kane doesn’t seem addicted to nicotine.
He leans back into the sofa’s cushions, getting comfortable. “I like to keep my hands busy. Usually I’m on a computer, so when I’m not…” He shrugs. “It’s easier to think when I have something to fidget with.”
I’d like to ask what he was thinking about, but that’s too pushy—especially after our earlier conversation. I look around the room, studying it. “How did your…guy from across the street sneak in all this furniture?”
When my eyes return to Kane, I catch his eyes jerking up from my chest. His gaze meets mine while he hides whatever he’d been thinking.
Butterflies flutter in my lower belly.
He really is attracted to me, and I’m finding that I enjoy it. I’m also no longer embarrassed that my tank top reveals too much. It’s a heady feeling knowing that he can’t help but notice my breasts.
“The trailer was a rental, which also made it appealing. All Sean had to do was make the hidden hatch door and sneak in the groceries after dark.”
This is the second time he’s mentioned the man across the street, and I mentally store away his name. “You don’t sleep much,” I comment.
“It’s part of the job. Had I been sleeping when the loft was breached, we wouldn’t be sitting here right now.”
Very true. I tuck a strand of hair behind my ear and look at him curiously. “Would they try anything during the day?”
He shakes his head, reaching for the can of beer sitting on the table that I hadn’t noticed earlier. “I highly doubt it, not in this community,” he replies before taking a drink.
I glance at the computers on the table. “So…when you’re on the computers, is it because of my situation? Or are you working on other cases?”
He sets the can back down on the coaster located near one of the laptops. “Both. We have plenty of clients, though they’re all currently safely settled in their new lives.”
I grimace. “I’m the only one that has screwed up.”
He doesn’t deny it as he watches me, waiting to see what else I’ll ask.
“Kane?”
“Hmm?”
“Will I have to have a new name?” I ask quietly, dreading the answer.
His eyes turn quite serious. “We’ll sort it out when the time comes,” he says lightly.
I sigh, looking towards the darkened kitchen as a heavy dark cloud seems to hover over me. “I like my name. It’s become…me.” When my eyes return to Kane, I find that his attention has once more dipped to my breasts.
His eyes shift back to one of his laptops as he leans forward and opens it. “Go to bed, Tessa,” he says simply.
I’m not offended by his dismissal, because I think my lack of clothing has become too much of a distraction for him. Is it bad that I feel a sense of satisfaction?
Carefully, I ease to my feet. “Night, Kane.”
He just grunts, not looking at me.
* * *
I’m bored.
It’s the following day, and I’ve paced the small trailer dozens of times to ease my aching leg. I’ve made breakfast for Kane and myself, washed the dishes, and now I’m sitting in the armchair while Kane is focused on his computers.
I am so thankful to be alive and safe, but there’s no end to the boredom.
“Go watch Netflix,” I hear Kane mutter.
I shoot him a glare, not appreciating how parental he’d sounded. Naturally, he doesn’t bother looking up to see my reaction.
I chew on my bottom lip and look around the interior of the trailer. I’ve watched everything that had drawn my interest on Netflix, and nothing new has come out in the past few days. Reading is next to impossible, because my mind tends to drift back to what’s happening in real life. I’d found myself rereading chapters at a time, and eventually, I gave up.
I wouldn’t mind just enjoying Kane’s company, but he’s very engrossed with his computers today.
It’s also hot as hell outside.
Even with the air conditioning, the trailer is stuffy and warm. Feeling fidgety, I pull my hair up into a ponytail, holding it in place with my hand to keep it off my damp neck. I’d misplaced the only hairband I happened to own and have yet to find it.
Kane glances distractedly at me. “Try a cool shower,” he suggests lightly.
“How can you not be a sweaty mess?” I ask with exasperation. He’s in jeans and a tee. Yes, his skin has a light sheen to it from perspiration, but his shirt isn’t soaked with sweat in places.
I, on the other hand, have sweat pooling between my breasts, and my bra is damp.
Kane shrugs in response to my question.
A cool shower does sound heavenly, so I rise to my feet and go down the hall to my room. After grabbing fresh panties and clothes, I make my way to the small bathroom and close the door.
Reaching around the curtain, I turn on the shower before stripping off my clothing and leaving it in a pile on the floor. Then, I retrieve a towel from the cabinet and hang it on a hook by the shower.
I’m looking forward to washing the sweat from my body, and I climb into the shower. A soft sigh of enjoyment escapes me as I savor the cool spray sluicing down my heated body.
That’s when I see the dark shadow on the curtain to my left, and when I focus on what it is, I release a terrified screech. A large, wolf spider is clinging to the inside of the shower curtain mere inches from me.
I scramble out of the tub as fast as I can. In my haste, my foot catches on the edge of the tub, and I fall forward onto the slippery linoleum, landing on my hip with a yelp.
The door crashes open, and my head swings towards the sound, my mind struggling to keep up with what’s happening. Kane stands in the doorway, body tense, gun out and aimed.
His hazel eyes scan the room, searching for danger.
“Spider,” I say weakly, still dismayed over how quickly the situation had unfolded.
Kane glances down at me, blinking when he realizes I’m dripping wet and naked as I lie there. His eyes run over me before lifting to my face. “Spider?” he asks almost blankly.
“A big one,” I mutter, becoming mortified that I’m completely nude. Carefully, I try to hoist myself to my feet, wincing. The floor is wet beneath me, and I look for something to grab onto for balance.
Kane quickly tucks his gun into the waistband of his jeans and reaches for me, helping me to my feet. We both reach for the towel on the hook at the same time, and our heads painfully collide.
I hiss, and Kane quickly tugs me to his chest, his hand cupping my stinging scalp where his head had made contact with mine.
“Sometimes, you’re a walking train wreck,” he muses, affectionately holding me.
My earlier embarrassment fades as I savor his embrace, my arms wrapping around his waist. The air around us becomes heavy as we’re momentarily silent.
“Tessa,” Kane says in a strained voice.
I look up at him.
A muscle flexes in his jaw as his hazel eyes struggle not to look at me. “I’m going to let you go and walk away,” he says determinedly.
My
heart begins to pound with growing awareness. He wants me. I can see it in every angle of his features. The visible desire he’s trying to control triggers my shyness to fade. If I don’t live in this moment, I will think back on it later and most certainly regret it. “Kane?”
His jaw clenches as he stares hard at the shower curtain.
“You’re the first man to see me naked. Please make the memory a good one,” I say softly, not quite sure what has come over me or how I’d come to be so bold. Kane has definitely awakened something deep inside me. It certainly helps that even though he tries to hide his attraction, it’s still very noticeable.
“Tessa,” he groans, pure temptation in his voice.
Heat sweeps throughout my veins as I pull together further courage. “Touch me like you do in your dreams,” I whisper.
“I don’t want to hurt you,” he says thickly, still refusing to meet my gaze.
“Look at me,” I coax.
Slowly, his hazel eyes meet mine.
“You won’t,” I assure.
That’s all the further enticement he needs, because his lips claim mine as his warm hands wrap around my naked waist. As his tongue strokes my own, he lifts me up and props me on the edge of the countertop next to the sink.
My hands clutch his shoulders as he kisses me deeply, his denim-clad hips making room between my thighs as he moves closer. I am completely naked while he’s fully dressed, and it’s exciting and erotic. I’d always wondered if or when I experienced intimacy with a man, if I’d be comfortable enough to allow him to see me naked.
With Kane, I feel like I have nothing to hide. Perhaps it’s because I’ve always been more insecure about my leg than actual nudity.
Kane breaks the kiss and trails his lips down my jaw.
Immediately, I arch my neck, and his warm lips continue their downward journey, his tongue tasting my skin here and there. With every seductive flick of his tongue over my sensitive skin, I shiver.
When his mouth latches onto my left nipple, I gasp loudly and reach for his head. My fingers sink into his hair as I open my eyes and gaze down at his dark blond head.
It’s mind-blowing seeing such a sexy man paying so much attention to my body, and I want to watch every second of this moment. Kane’s eyes lift to mine as he flicks his tongue back and forth across the distended tip as I shudder.
The sensations are new, and I can feel wetness forming between my legs.
He watches me while he brings his right hand up to brush his thumb across my right breast.
“Kane…” I gasp, my hips arching for something that I’ve never felt before.
A knowing look gleams in his eye, and his head lifts from my breast so that his face is inches from mine. “You want to come, Tessa?” he asks, his voice all low and velvety.
“Touch me,” I beg, instinctively opening my legs wider. My need far outweighs any insecurity.
Kane’s attention drops down to the apex of my thighs, and when I look down, I can see the pink flesh between my legs. Because I like to keep the hair closely shaved down there, I’m completely bared to him.
“Beautiful,” Kane whispers, and his hand slowly moves towards my folds. I tense with anticipation before his finger trails through the trimmed hair until his finger brushes against my swollen clit.
I bite my lip as his eyes lift to mine, watching me intently as he lightly begins to manipulate the sensitive flesh.
“Feel good?” he murmurs.
“Yes…” My breathing begins to quicken.
“More?” he asks.
“Yes!” I gasp.
His hand moves, and then I feel his forefinger and middle finger gently slide into my slick wetness. I go still, adjusting to the sensation. I kind of like it…
Kane groans. “You’re so fucking wet…and tight.”
His voice causes my inner muscles to clench around his fingers, and he draws in a shuddering breath. He slides his fingers in a little deeper and then presses his thumb to my clit.
My automatic reaction is to push myself further into his hand. I lean back against the wall and mirror, bracing my hands on the countertop so I can see exactly what he’s doing to me.
It’s erotic.
He eases his fingers out of me about two inches and then gently slides them back in until his thumb brushes my clit.
I moan and begin to roll my hips, needing more.
Kane’s fingers begin to slide in and out of me at a faster pace, and I am desperate for that continuous pressure against my clit, so I meet every thrust of his fingers with my hips.
“That’s it, Tessa,” he breathes.
My gaze lifts, and I see that his eyes are on my face, watching me come undone. The look in his eyes is my undoing, and I feel something building as I push my hips into his hand. “Kane!”
He pushes his fingers in and then keeps them there as his thumb moves in circles against my clit.
Everything within me explodes, and I cry out as I arch my hips, savoring the most pleasurable sensations I’ve ever felt in my entire life. My inner muscles contract with the orgasm, and Kane keeps his fingers in place while continuing to gently brush my clit until the waves of pleasure fade.
I rest limply against the mirror above the counter as I struggle to catch my breath.
That was…
I can’t even pull my thoughts together yet.
Kane gently eases his fingers out of me, his eyes on mine. His gaze then roams over me. My legs are still wide open as my breasts lift and fall with every inhale and exhale.
A muscle in his jaw flexes before he stiffly turns and reaches for the towel beside the shower, handing it to me.
I take it and frown at him. “Kane?”
He simply shakes his head, refusing to look at me.
I reach for him. “I want to return the favor.” I’m sure he can tell me what he likes…
“No,” Kane says hoarsely, backing away, his expression tortured.
“Kane…”
“We’ve taken this too far, and someone will get hurt.”
I know he’s referring to me, and I can also sense there’s no changing his mind. I’m beginning to feel way too vulnerable, and I clear my throat awkwardly, easing down from the counter.
I wrap the towel around my now mostly dry body. Though certain parts of my body are quite…moist.
Kane nods curtly, turns, and walks out of the bathroom.
I recall the reason for him barging into the bathroom in the first place. “Kane!” I hurry to the doorway and see that he’d paused in the hallway but he’s not looking back at me. “The spider? Please?”
I then quickly dart into my room and firmly close the door. Out in the hall, I can hear Kane’s footsteps returning to the bathroom.
Feeling floored by what had just happened moments earlier, I sit down on the bed. My body is still pleasantly tingling. I don’t regret it, not for even a second, though I do wish it had gone further. I would love my first time to be with someone I trust, and I very much trust Kane.
Plus, I don’t see very many men in my future. Maybe someday someone will want to get to know me on that level, but eventually, he’ll leave.
A dull ache begins to develop in my chest.
I can’t have babies because of the accident that took my mother’s life and damaged my leg. Honestly, I’m beginning to think that I’m destined to forever be alone, and it’s such a heavy, lonely feeling.
Dwelling over things that I can’t change accomplishes nothing, so I shake it off and focus on the present.
It’s important that things don’t become awkward with Kane, so I need to work on damage control. Rising to my feet, I note my knee and calf aching more than usual thanks to my fall in the bathroom. I slip on a fresh tank, with a bra beneath, and panties and shorts.
When I return to the bathroom, Kane is gone, and I’m assuming the spider as well. I take a couple of pain relievers and work on composing myself.
When I reenter the living room a few minutes l
ater, Kane is absorbed with one of his laptops.
“I’m going to make some cookies. Want some?” I ask breezily as I head for the kitchen.
“Sure.”
* * *
It’s impossible to sleep late that night.
This time, it isn’t because I am yearning for Kane, or that it’s too hot.
It’s my leg.
It’s worse tonight thanks to the fall I’d taken in the bathroom. I’ve been sitting in bed, trying to massage the ache from my calf, but it’s not helping. As much as walking can aggravate it, it can also loosen what’s left of my muscle when it’s stiff.
After turning on the lamp, I quietly rise to my feet and begin tentatively pacing the small room, grimacing. There isn’t much space for walking, but it’ll do.
I think I’ve been pacing for about five minutes when there’s a gentle knock on the bedroom door. I hadn’t meant to draw Kane’s attention, and I wince.
After what went on between us, I hadn’t wanted to pace the living room and kitchen, risking bothering him. I’d worked hard to try to keep things normal afterwards, and I’d felt that I’d accomplished that throughout the day. Even though I’d talked with him late last night, I hadn’t wanted him to think that I was trying to draw his attention.
I pause by the bed. “Yes?”
“Can I come in?” his gravelly voice asks from the other side of the door.
“Sure.” I am happy to spend time with him, and my mood perks up a little.
Kane opens the door and peeks in, his expression questioning. “What are you doing?”
“Walking.”
He glances at my leg and then lifts his gaze to mine. “Rough night because of the fall earlier?”
“I’m just trying to loosen the tightness,” I confess.
He moves further into the room. “Sit down,” he says, motioning to the bed.
Wariness fills me, but I’m also enjoying his attention. I move towards the bed and take a seat as he’d requested.
He sits down near me and holds out his hand. “Swing her over here,” he orders.
I look at him doubtfully. It’s one thing for him to see my leg but entirely different for him to touch it.