by Cynthia Dane
“I’m fine,” he mumbled.
“You look so tense.” Judith crawled forward, her cleavage on full display beneath his gaze. “There must be something I can do for you.” Her fingers grazed his zipper, but did not pull it down. Not without his permission. “Say the word. I am yours to command tonight.”
War raged within Miguel. He came in here determined to simply use her. To pay her for her services – and to keep her mouth shut, if it wasn’t moaning or sucking his cock. He was going to prove to himself and the world that Judith was nothing more than a convenient, gorgeous body for him to use as he saw fit. After all, he paid for her time and efforts. There was supposed to be nothing more to it than that!
On the other side lurked an army declaring their intentions to put many things to rest. Not just sex. All the junk Miguel had stored in the back of his mind and heart for the better part of a decade.
These women were therapists, in their own way. Thing was, most of the men they encountered only wanted sexual therapy. Or for them to stay quiet while they worked through their own issues – balls deep, of course. Miguel couldn’t blame them. How many times had he paid to fuck a woman and used that rush to clear his head and refocus on whatever business was at hand?
“Hold on.” He grabbed Judith’s wrist with one hand and pushed her hair back with the other. Fingers drew lines along her jaw, tipping her chin up and making her stare at him with lips parted. “Not so fast. I want to talk first.”
Had any man said that to her before? The way Judith gaped at him said a hearty no.
“What would you like to talk about, sir?” she asked. Any trace of surprise was gone from her visage. “My ears are open.”
Probably other things were open as well. Miguel distracted himself with a touch to her cheek before succumbing to what was on his mind. “Do you want me, Judith? Tell me the truth. Am I a client to you? Or do you want more from me?”
She cocked her head, lips twitching. What am I doing to her? She played the dumb girl easily enough tonight, but inside she was probably exploding in “What the fuck is this?” Miguel was turning into a nightmare client. Great. “What do you mean?”
“I mean do you want me to be your patron? More than the other man bidding on you.”
The real Judith came back. She sat back on her legs, ignoring his gaze. “I cannot help it. I’ve never seen it go on for this long… I’ve never had two men want me as badly as you two do. Most give up after three rounds of bidding. Either it’s not worth the money, or they realize how silly the whole thing seems.”
“Do you get a choice? Could you tell your madam that you have a preference?”
“Of course I can.” She narrowed her eyes. “You think she hasn’t asked me my preference?”
Naturally, she has. Whoever the other guy was, he apparently could compete in terms of money and class. Even if the other bastard was as rich as Miguel – doubtful, honestly – Monica would have overrode a bid if he was a potential nuisance. I wonder if he’s local. Was that preferable to a guy who wouldn’t even be around for half the month? “Forgive me. I shouldn’t intrude like that.”
Judith’s face softened again. “Look, Miguel, I like you. A lot. You’re one of the best guys I’ve ever had… and there have been…”
“A lot. I know.” Miguel was unfazed “That other guy must be one of the best, too.”
She looked to the painting hanging above her dresser. “He made that for me. He’s a painter. We became close because I model for him. Twice a week, he comes here and paints pictures of me.” Was she blushing?
Was that pissing Miguel off?
I don’t. Get jealous. About their lives. Until he met Judith, Miguel was so laissez faire about the other clients that he couldn’t believe he would be jealous. He hadn’t been jealous about Clive and Serene, right? Right.
So why the fuck was Judith so different? How many men had she been with since Miguel started seeing her? Not this other guy, either… there had to have been other clients who paid for more than general companionship or even a whip and ball grab. What did they do with her? Did they make her face away from them, so they wouldn’t have to look her in the eye while they fucked her? Did they make her get on her knees and gaze at him adoringly while she sucked their cocks? Did they fuck her ass, her tits, her cunt over and over until she couldn’t walk anymore? Did she fake it for them? Or did she like them enough to come on her own? Did they even care if she came, if she liked them? How selfish were these jerks?
They don’t “make” her do anything. He wasn’t just thinking that because of her profession, either. Judith had made it clear the few times they met that she didn’t do anything she wasn’t comfortable with. She had that privilege in her career now. She had to enjoy those men to some extent, even if it was the money that made her enjoy them the most.
Was it even possible that she liked Miguel more than them?
“He sounds like a tender and sensitive man,” Miguel mumbled. “I think you’ve told me that before, though.”
“Probably.” Judith shrugged. “He’s almost the complete opposite of you. He lives a slowed down life. He used to be a doctor. That makes him sound older than he is, though.”
A doctor? A doctor? Fuck! “Promise me that you would be happy with that man as your patron. If that’s the case, then I won’t sweat this whole thing. I’ll keep bidding until I can’t anymore, Judith, but that’s only because I…”
He stopped. They shared a fleeting look. They both knew what he wanted to say, and Judith was going to bite her lip to hold back whatever wanted to burst from her mouth. “Let’s forget about that,” she said, taking his hand. “Why don’t we do what you really came here to do.”
“You still want to do that?”
“Miguel, I have always wanted to do that with you.” Her salacious smile was back. “You set it up, and I’ll get back into the headspace you crushed a few minutes ago. Shouldn’t take me long. The way you barged in here all domineering… fuck me, Miguel, but not before you make sure I know I belong to you tonight.”
Belong. What a powerful, dangerous word.
You will belong to me. He studied the rings hanging above Judith’s bed, easy enough to ignore if one wasn’t into that. Tonight, Miguel was. He rummaged through the chest at the end of her bed and found some leather straps to his liking. Steel handcuffs. A large crop, in case his hand grew tired of spanking her tender flesh. A ball gag. Silk blindfolds. He probably wouldn’t use all of these things tonight, but considering them made the anticipation grow in his gut. The things he would do to her…
Judith was back to acting the sweet submissive by the time Miguel had threaded the straps and connected them with the handcuffs. He took off his suit jacket and draped it across the closed chest. His tie fell on top of the jacket. Judith sat up on her knees and unbuttoned the top of his dress shirt as he reached around and grabbed her ass.
“I’m going to ask you a lot of things tonight,” he whispered in her ear. “I don’t want you to lie. That’s important. Even if you don’t think I want to hear it, tell me the truth.”
“Yes, Mr. Bolivar,” she whispered back. “I would never lie to you, anyway.”
“Do you usually lie to clients?”
She sat back again, surprised. “If I think it benefits me, yes.”
“Let me assure you that lying will not benefit you tonight.”
Judith nodded. “I understand, sir. Your wish is my command.” Somehow, she didn’t giggle when she said that.
Miguel had a lot of wishes. He wished to ravage her, right there – to push her back on the bed and plunge into her, as he had always done… how men had always done. He wished to stroke her tenderly, to listen to her coo and giggle softly. He wished to nibble on her extremities and lick the length of her folds. Her pleasure was as important as his, even if he was running the show.
Most of all, he wished to simply savor the woman that was Judith King. Not as his mistress, not as his means to an erotic end… but as t
he closest thing to a girlfriend and a confidant that he had possessed in so long.
“We’re going to play a little game,” he announced, snapping her wrists in the handcuffs so she knelt with her arms above her head. “You’re going to tell me something I don’t know about you, and then I will tell you something too. Don’t hold back. If I think you’re holding back…” He held up the crop. “I’ll encourage you to be more forthcoming. Take that as you will.”
“Yes, sir.” Her head and chest remained high. She sucked in her breath to feel the crop caress her hardening nipple through the lace of her negligee. “What do you want to know?”
“Have you ever been in love before? Real love.”
Judith was the master of her demeanor, and yet even she could not completely hide how off-guard that question made her. “Not really. There have been a lot of men that I was fond of, but I couldn’t say I loved any of them. That’s the thing about my business. I’ve been in it for so long that I’ve distanced myself from those kinds of emotions. They don’t exactly make me money.”
The crop caressed her other nipple. Her reward for telling him the truth. I had thought as much. “Have you ever considered retiring?”
She smirked. “I thought we were going to exchange tales.”
“When I’m done asking you questions, I’ll tell you a story that I’ve never told anyone else in my life.”
Her ears perked at that. “I don’t want to retire. I love my job. Even if I fell in love with someone… like that… I don’t know if I could ever leave this job. No man would ever let me keep hooking, though.”
Miguel already wanted to get away from that question. He put distance between her answer and his next question by running the crop up and down her left breast, watching it rise, drop, and rise again. Her lips sucked into her mouth as she held in a groan.
“What do you like most about me, Judith? Why do you look forward to seeing me?” He lightly tapped her areola. She released her breath with a heavy puff. “Be sure to tell me the truth. I don’t want to hear what you think I want to hear.”
She was silent for a moment. Coming up with her answer? Was she going to lie? Would she have to be punished?
“I guess the thing I like the most is how comfortable I am around you. From the first time we met, you were conscious of me. Most clients aren’t like that. I mean, you were buying my services for the night, but you were considerate even when you were splitting my pussy in two.” Her renewed smile was otherworldly.
Miguel dropped the crop and cupped her breasts with both hands, lips hitting hers as his tongue entered her mouth and stroked whatever it could find. One hand meandered from breast to ass again. How is she so irresistible? He kissed her throat, feeling her breath on his cheek and her taut flesh in his hands. “Do you want me, Judith?”
“Of course, Miguel. I wanted you the moment you walked into this room for the first time. There was… is… something about you that I’m drawn too. I hope you feel the same way.”
Did he? God, yes, he did. “Do you like having sex with me?”
“Yes.”
“Talking to me?”
“Absolutely.” Judith leaned forward, as much as she could with her arms hanging above her head. “Now tell me your tale, Miguel. Your secrets are safe with me. I want to know more about you.”
His throat went dry. It was now or never. As memories flooded his mind, Miguel snatched the crop from the bed and rolled up his sleeves.
And spoke.
“A long time ago, when yours truly was fresh from grad school, I met a girl named Rosa Diaz at a party. Long story short, we fell in love after only a few weeks of dating.”
It was the first time he said the name “Rosa Diaz” out loud in years. Perhaps longer. Had he ever said her name since the day she left him?
“Only time I’ve ever been in love like that. She was everything to me. The most beautiful woman I had ever laid eyes on. She knew how to crack a joke and make a guy feel comfortable. I was so in love with her that I seriously thought about marrying her. My parents objected. Foolishly, I listened to their objections, because I was young and still making my own way through the world. Now I can tell them to go fuck themselves because I’ve made my millions upon millions.”
Judith continued to stare at him through those wide hazel eyes, but said nothing.
“So I thought… maybe we could keep our relationship a secret. I could bide my time until I was in a better position to marry without my parents’ permission. Rosa seemed game for it. She split her time between Grenada and her parents’ home country of Venezuela, so I figured we could meet here in America. Who the fuck would know? I paid for everything. She paid her way most of the time. She was from a wealthy family like mine, so money wasn’t an object.”
Judith’s lip curled. “What happened?”
After heaving a mighty sigh, Miguel continued, “We were supposed to meet in Miami for the Fourth of July. We were going to go dancing, watch the fireworks… sun on the beach. She never showed up to our hotel. I feared the worst… plane crash, car crash, illness… but who could I call and ask? Nobody knew we were still seeing each other. All I could find out was that she never got on her plane to Miami.” Something burned in the back of Miguel’s throat. Not tears. Definitely not tears. Instead, he channeled his negative energy through the crop, slapping the bed beside Judith’s right knee. “After worrying myself sick, a mutual friend of ours forwarded me an internet article. I’ll never forget the fucking headline.”
Judith didn’t say anything, waiting for him to continue.
“‘Heiress Weds Salvador Moreno II In Surprise Marriage Ceremony.’” The crop twitched in Miguel’s hand. That fucking picture of her and that weasel. “I couldn’t believe my eyes. They had hitched in Jamaica on the day she was supposed to come meet me. She had to have known she was going to do that. Why the fuck did she agree to come to Miami if she was going to ditch me all along?”
“I’m sorry, Miguel.”
No matter how many times Judith said sorry, it wouldn’t change the past. “The next day, she called me and asked me to meet her in Miami. I was so hungover when I went to see her for lunch. I still couldn’t believe it. The first thing out of my mouth was why?”
“Did she answer you?”
“Not at first. Then, when she spoke, she held not a bit of remorse. She said she was pregnant with Moreno’s kid. Can you believe it? Turned out she had been cheating on me for over a year.”
“Oh my God.”
“The Morenos aren’t the best family around, ethically speaking. Lots of rumors that they’re in a certain trade I don’t want to talk about.”
“Of course.”
“I guess Rosa had a thing for families of sin. My family and their casinos… Salvador’s and the… mierda.” The crop was coming close to breaking in his hands. “They’re still together. They have three kids.” He finally dropped the crop, hands hanging limply at his sides. “Sometimes I wish that kid could’ve been mine. Then my parents couldn’t object to us getting married. They’re a little old fashioned like that.”
“It wouldn’t have mattered.” Judith’s sudden words surprised him. “She would’ve kept on cheating on you, Miguel. Your happiness would’ve been fleeting. I know it hurt, but it was for the best in the end.”
“Don’t you think I’ve thought about that constantly over the years?” He loved Rosa like he loved his own life, but it wouldn’t have been enough to keep her. My love is worthless. That was the same conclusion he always came to. Not like Miguel didn’t know what a “catch” he was. If even a guy like him couldn’t inspire a woman to stay true, then how good was he, really? Money didn’t matter. Looks didn’t matter. Charm and a big cock he knew how to use didn’t fucking matter. He would’ve given Rosa the world, and she still would’ve played around. If not with her now husband, then with someone else. “Right after she dumped me and went back to her honeymoon, I went to an escort service and took whomever they would assign to me. T
hat’s been my life ever since.” He snorted. “Only I’m more discerning now, of course.”
“So you buy sex instead of procuring it for free, like most people.” Judith was not smiling. Nor was she frowning. How was it possible for a woman to be so relaxed and imparting her wisdom when she was strung up like that? “If you pay for it, then you’ve built that barrier between you and the other woman. If it’s free, then there’s the danger of emotions, and you might get hurt again.”
“I don’t want to think about how much of my life I gave her, and she didn’t even care.” Damn these feelings flooding his mind, his heart, and his fuckin’ loins! I would get a hard-on thinking about it. That’s how weak he was. “I hadn’t been with any other woman since the moment we met.”
“I’m so sorry, Miguel.” Judith’s arms trembled. “That’s a lot of pain to be carrying around for so long.” She regained her composure. “You’re here with me now. You’ve demanded this kind of night for a reason.” The look of determination on her face almost made him shudder. “Take it all out on me. Go on. I can handle it. Do whatever you want. I’m yours, Miguel. I’m not going anywhere. Tonight, you are the only man I’ll be thinking about. I am the most transparent woman you have ever met.” Her smile melted his worries. “Now use me unlike you’ve ever used a woman before.”
Easier said than done. For her, he might chance feeling those emotions again.
Chapter 19
JUDITH
In truth, he was starting to scare her a little.
Nothing she couldn’t handle. Judith had been on the receiving end of every man’s scorn, passion, desire, guilt, and fear. Miguel was no different. Nope. He had a sad story like every man who came to see her. Sometimes that sad story was, “My father did despicable things to me as a child.” Or, “I saw my brother get hit by a car, and I can never get rid of that image.” Other times it was, “My wife doesn’t want me anymore. I don’t want her anymore. We can’t get divorced because of these crazy dumb reasons.”