by KyAnn Waters
“I hope it isn’t serious.”
“The children will be up soon. I’m going to talk with Sissy, but I don’t have time this morning. Can you keep the conversation simple?”
She nodded.
“Don’t give anything away about your permanent position here. I’ll explain it. Just make yourself comfortable, and we’ll talk about how we proceed when I get home tonight.”
“Can I get you coffee before you go?”
TJ shook his head. “No, I drink coffee with the men.”
Allison followed TJ out of the room and watched as he headed down the stairs. His boots landed hard on each step.
“I’ll keep Train close to the house,” he said over his shoulder. “If you need wood or anything, he’ll be happy to help.”
Allison stood at the top of the stairs. TJ’s footfalls trailed through the kitchen and disappeared. The back door shut and he was gone.
“Where’s Papa going?” Sissy asked, rubbing sleep from her eyes.
“He went to work. How about some breakfast?” And with that Allison began her first day of work.
She started in the kitchen. Sissy sat on the counter and chattered. Michael didn’t seem to mind sitting in the wooden highchair. She polished the glass windows until the sun reflected a clear luster. Curtains, once mustard yellow, were washed, pressed, and now the color of summer sunflowers.
“It’s going to take a bit longer than I had originally thought,” she said to Sissy. “But I think we’ll eventually get this place as shiny as a new penny.”
When she first put water on the floor, it turned the dust to mud. She scrubbed with a bristle bush and hot water until skin started to peel from her knuckles.
“When my papa gets cuts on his hands he has me wrap them in clean linen.” Sissy took Allison by the skirt and led her to the pantry. “Do they hurt?” Sissy instructed Allison to sit in a chair while she took strips of linen and carefully wrapped each of Allison’s fingers.
“Not since the bleeding stopped.” She smiled at the top of the child’s head. Sissy’s fingers gently tied knots in the bandages.
“Hi.” Train stood in the doorway of the pantry holding his hat in his hands. “How’s it going? Oh shit!” His smile dissolved into a frown when he looked at the little girl. “Sis, what happened?” He threw his hat to the counter and hurried to Allison’s side were he knelt and examined the fingers Sissy hadn’t yet bandaged. “I mean—” He nervously glanced from Allison to Sissy. “Sorry for the cussin’, ma’am. Do you need a doctor?”
“Of course not.” She stood and gave Sissy a gentle pat on her cheek to say thank you. “Now get out of this clean kitchen with those dirty boots. I’m damaged enough for one day without having to redo what’s already done.” She scooted Train toward the door. “And I’d appreciate your discretion about my injuries. I don’t need TJ getting mad because of a few blisters and a scratch.”
“Whatever you say.” He tipped his hat and bowed. Allison thought of Marion when Train smiled. Marion could tell the difference between a smile of friendship, and one that asked a question of a woman. Allison not only wanted to recognize the difference, but when she looked at TJ, she wanted to be able to deliver the one that said friendship. She worried the one she wore revealed the secret yearnings driving her to distraction. She couldn’t help wondering how many women had fallen into TJ’s bed.
Shaking her head, she turned her attention back to Train. “Thank you for stopping by. Did you need something?”
He gave her a crooked smile. “Nope, just checking in. If you need me, give a holler. I’ll be close enough to hear.” He winked, turned, and left.
Allison fixed Sissy and Michael lunch before tackling her next project. The house had been neglected for the year and a half TJ’s wife had been deceased, but it was clear the children hadn’t been. TJ made sure they wore clean clothing. Some of Sissy dresses had been satisfactorily mended even if the stitches weren’t straight.
“How come you’re doing chores?” Sissy sat on her bed and combed the hair of her doll. “Company isn’t supposed to clean.”
“I know guests usually don’t clean the house. I thought I might stay a while. Is that all right with you?”
Sissy shrugged.
“What’s your doll’s name?” Allison wiped the top of the dresser. “I had a doll named Cocoa when I was about your age. My mother was very strict about sweets. I loved sugar, especially chocolate. Probably because I wasn’t allowed to have any except on special occasions. At the time, I thought my mother was mean. Now I’m grateful. I still have all my teeth. See.” Allison smiled wide.
“I don’t got a mother.”
Allison stopped cleaning and sat on the bed. “I know.” She reached out and touched Sissy’s hair, letting a silky tendril curl around her finger.
“I thought Papa was bringing you home to be my mama,” Sissy said in a soft whisper. “When you were here before I told him I thought you were real nice. He said you were pretty, too.”
Allison was alarmed…then thrilled at hearing those words. “Did your father say anything else?”
Sissy smiled and nodded her head.
“I heard Papa talkin’ to Train about the wiles of women. It must hurt because Papa said he tried to avoid it.”
“He thought that about me? I’ve never used feminine wiles.” She contemplated her behavior with TJ. “Well, maybe I came close with Train when I was looking for a ride to the ranch in two feet of snow.” She looked down at Sissy who sat curiously watching her.
Sissy continued, “Train said he ain’t never seen a woman as pretty as you and that you could give him wiles if you had the mind to.”
Allison sucked in her breath.
“Papa told him he didn’t know what he was asking for. That’s how I figured it must hurt to get the wiles. I’m never going to be a woman. There’s my brother.” She jumped from the bed and hurried from the room to get Michael up from his nap.
* * *
Well past supper, the sun blazed low in the West. Allison and the children were outside when TJ finally walked up to the house. Sissy jumped rope and Michael played with his wooden toys in the dirt of a neglected flowerbed. There was crispness to the air, but one that refreshed rather than chilled.
Allison sat on the bottom step of the porch as TJ approached. “Hungry?” she asked.
TJ shook his head.
“The children have already eaten. There’s chicken on the stove. I kept it warm.”
“You didn’t need to do that,” he said without looking at her.
“I thought the children could play for a while before their bath.”
He stood close to her keeping his eyes on Sissy as she did cartwheels across the yard. “I don’t expect you to work from sunup until sundown for me, either. I’ll get Sissy and Tiger ready for bed.” He walked past her, up the steps, and called for the children to come into the house.
Suddenly Allison was alone. Her day had been busy. Trying to manage the children and the housework proved more difficult than she’d expected. Now with the quiet evening, she could relax. She hadn’t realized just how exhausted she was. The fatigued muscles in her legs burned when she climbed the stairs and retired to her room. It wasn’t yet dark when she went to bed, preparing for another night of restless dreams about a certain rancher with wide shoulders that flexed beneath worn-thin homespun. With such an inept servant to run his home, it was no wonder he was churlish. At least asleep, she was safe to dream of him as the tempting man from the brothel, the one that took a whore—like he believed her to be—to bed.
* * *
In the morning, Allison woke first. The sun still slept as well as the roosters, the crickets, and the family. It was perfect. Carrying the lantern from her room, she made her way down the stairs, careful not to cause them to creak. Once in the kitchen, she breathed a little easier. She glanced at the clock. She hadn’t been up at three-thirty in the morning on many occasions. After tossing a few logs into the stove, she
set the coffeepot on to heat.
While the coffee simmered, Allison threw together a quick batch of yeast dough and made rolls. It surprised her that she remembered the simple things she’d seen done a thousand times in her own home as a child. Hopefully, she wasn’t forgetting any of the steps for sweet bread. She almost wept remembering the delicious aroma. During the cold months, she loved hot bread and apple cider.
“Couldn’t you sleep?”
“Aye!” Allison let out a little scream. She hadn’t heard TJ approach. “I’m sorry.” She clutched the fabric at her neck. Her heart pounded. “I didn’t mean to wake you.”
“I didn’t mean to scare you,” he said. “I didn’t expect you to be up. I saw the light and wondered if something was wrong. Is it your hands?”
“No, and I told Train not to tell you. Just a couple of scratches.” Allison stuffed her hands into the pockets of her apron. “I made coffee. Would you like a cup?”
TJ nodded and then sat at the table.
The lantern offered a modest amount of light to the room. Dancing shadows played tricks with TJ’s mind, shifting the angles of Allison’s face. The belt of her apron silhouetted a trim waist, and the thin fabric of her dress molded to her shoulders. He didn’t like his body’s response. His cock thickened and his heart skipped into a quicker tempo.
“Sissy told me she bandaged you up. I talked with her last night.” TJ ran his hands through his hair. “She’s confused. She told me mamas clean the house. She’s a bit smitten with you. It hasn’t been easy on her since Janelle died. I guess I should be grateful Michael is too young to remember.”
Allison set two cups of coffee on the table and then sat across from him. “For what it’s worth, they seem well-adjusted.” Allison pushed a stray tendril of hair from her face.
TJ wondered how the silky tresses would feel running through his fingers. When she looked back at him, a flash of heat burned in his gut. He shouldn’t stare, but was powerless to turn away. A moment passed. Young and beautiful, like Janelle had been when he married her. With that, the spell weaving around them broke. Reality crashed into his thoughts.
“I think I’ll try and go back to bed,” he said, pushing the chair from the table. As he was about to leave the kitchen, he turned. “Goodnight.”
“I’m up for the day. I’m making sweet bread.”
“Then I think I’ll eat breakfast with the kids.”
Allison smiled. “Then I’ll see you in a couple hours.”
TJ nodded and left the room.
Allison spent the next hour getting ready for the day. She braided her hair and changed into a yellow dress embroidered with small cranberry colored flowers. She’d purchased the dress while working at the brothel. Perhaps it was a bit much for house cleaning, but for reasons she wasn’t ready to admit, she wanted to look nice.
TJ returned to the kitchen before the children woke. He sat at the table. Allison, not yet familiar where Janelle kept supplies, attempted to locate certain items she needed. But with TJ watching her, her palms grew damp. Anxiety had her blood pumping and her nerves on edge. Taking steady breaths, she maintained outward composure. At least, she hoped TJ wasn’t aware of her responses to him.
“Where’s your family?” he asked.
The only sounds in the kitchen were her nervously dropping dishes.
“Boston.” She stood on a small step stool to look in the cupboards just out of her reach. “My father made his fortune, then quit working. I don’t think working ever crossed my mother’s mind. She would absolutely forbid my being here. I have two brothers.” She sighed and her shoulders relaxed. “I wonder if my mother has married them off. Probably,” she said more to herself.
“I see you’re opposed to marriage.” TJ’s eyebrow rose.
“I didn’t say that.” Allison wished she had kept her mouth shut. This wasn’t a topic she wanted to discuss. “I’m sure marriage is a fine institution. I’m not sure if I want to be institutionalized.” She got down from the stepstool with a tarnished silver bowl.
TJ laughed. “I see there’s more to you than I thought.”
“Not much more.” Any secrets she carried would stay hidden. Avoiding his probing glances, she took the coffee from the stove.
“Has Miss Allison been soured on love?”
After she topped off his coffee, he took a sip.
“How about you? It’s been more than a year. Are you going to look for love again?” She regretted the words as soon as they were out of her mouth. She sounded too eager for his reply. She told herself she wasn’t asking because of her own interests, only curious about TJ. Still a young man, TJ’s choice to be alone made Allison sorry for him. The expression on her face must have revealed her thoughts. The smile that had played across his features only a moment before changed into a pinched grimace.
“I’m staying faithful to my wife.”
“What about Sandy?”
TJ stood abruptly, scraping his chair along the floor. “Janelle and I have two children. I’m here and she’s in heaven. We’re still raising them together. Beyond that, it isn’t any of your business. Sandy is strictly professional. She attends to a man’s needs. And that has nothing to do with love.”
Sissy walked into the room rubbing her eyes. “Papa,” she said. “Are you hungry?”
“Yep, but Allison’s taken care of breakfast for us this morning. She’s made sweet bread.” He kissed her forehead before pulling out a chair for her. “I think it’s a good idea for Allison to make breakfast now that she’s staying with us.”
Allison tried to look busy, filling a bowl in the sink with water. She tossed more wood into the stove and filled a glass with milk for Sissy. “I hear Michael,” she said. “I’ll be back in a few minutes.” TJ thanked her with his eyes. She felt a jolt at the intimate exchange. It wasn’t smart for her to develop a personal attachment to TJ or his children. However, in one day, she knew she didn’t want to leave. Maybe she wouldn’t have to if TJ truly never wanted another wife. As long as Sandy did her job, she could keep hers. The thought comforted…and ripped at her heart.
* * *
The hours passed in a blur. Allison would finish one task to discover still more work to do. She had daily chores; laundry, dishes, and care of the children. Cleaning from room to room, her arms tired from lugging the heavy bucket around the house. By the end of the day, her back hunched from the strain. She was actually grateful TJ planned to bathe the kids. She didn’t have an ounce of strength left in her to lift the children into the tub.
TJ returned after supper. He ushered the children up the stairs for a bath while she stayed in the kitchen cleaning the dishes. She could hear Sissy laughing and TJ’s scolding. Allison couldn’t resist sneaking up the stairs to see about the commotion.
Tiptoeing down the hall, she stopped and listened at the door. Sissy chattered endlessly.
“Hold still,” TJ said to Michael. “You’ll get soap in your eyes. Sissy, would you stop making him splash.”
Allison peeked into the room. TJ leaned over the tub pouring water over Michael’s head to rinse the soap. TJ’s soaked shirt clung to his back, revealing every muscle. Dizziness clouded her mind. Her hands tightened into fists at her side.
Why couldn’t TJ have been an old rancher? She didn’t like the way her tongue anticipated the taste of his. Living at the Dusty Rose, she’d learned plenty. She’d never been with a man. Yet, she knew she wanted TJ.
Stepping out of view, she closed her eyes and listened to the gentle tone he used with the children. She pressed her thighs together wishing away the persistent ache between her legs.
“Your turn, Sis.” Water sloshed. Allison hurried back down the stairs to the kitchen.
Later that night, TJ sat before the fire reading a story. Sissy and Michael snuggled against him, one on each side.
“If you don’t have anything else for me to do, I thought I’d take a bath and go to bed.” Allison chewed her bottom lip. Those words brought forth carnal t
houghts. TJ just smiled, nodded, and then went back to reading.
Allison hurried up the stairs and into the bathroom. She stood before the tub and let her dress slip from her shoulders, dropping to her feet in a crumpled pile. Steam rose from the hot water in the large claw footed tub. Perhaps Allison should have asked, but the temptation was too great. She took a small amount of perfumed oil she’d found while cleaning and poured it into the water.
She felt deliciously naughty as she sank into the water up to her neck. Her muscles turned to butter as the hot water worked like magic and she slowly drifted off to sleep.
A light tapping at the door brought her out of her reverie. “Yes?” She sat up in the darkened bathroom. Water sloshed onto the floor. Her skin wrinkled, and the water had grown cold. How long had she been in the bath? The sun had set and a chill drifted through the room.
“I was beginning to worry.” TJ’s voice echoed from the hallway. “It’s late and you’ve been in there a long time. Do you need help?”
“No,” she said, embarrassed. “I fell asleep. Now it’s dark and I can’t see a thing.”
“I’ll get you a lantern.” His footsteps retreated.
Her hands fumbled along the floor looking for a towel.
“Allison, I’ve got a lantern. Do you want me to leave it in the hallway?”
Allison didn’t say anything. Her mind raced to find a solution to her dilemma. The distance between her and the light under the door was too far for her to navigate in the dark. TJ asked her again.
“I still can’t see.”
“Do you want me to open the door?”
“No!” she shrieked. “I’m still in the tub.”
TJ laughed. “You can’t stay in there until sunup. I’m going to open the door and bring you the lantern.”
She slumped deeper into the cold water. Her teeth began to chatter. “Promise not to look.”
The door slowly opened. Soft yellow light spilled into the room. Mirrors on the walls reflected the glow.
“Hurry,” she pleaded to him. “I’m humiliated enough.” Allison snapped her eyes closed, pulled her legs tight to her chest and rested her forehead on her knees.