by Sophie Stern
One thing at a time.
I need to do one thing at a time.
Today, that thing is Rose.
I need to get my girl back.
11
Rose
It would be easy to sit around and feel sorry for myself, but I’m done with that life. I’m not interested in that anymore. I’m not up for that.
No, I’m going to be better than the scared, weak woman I was before.
I’m going to be stronger.
Parker is pissed at me. I get it. He has every right to be. If he likes me as much as I think he does, he’s probably hurting and a little embarrassed. Hell, after everything he went through with Janine, maybe he feels betrayed. Maybe he feels like I betrayed him the way she did.
And I am not her.
The truth is that I should have told him about the dare. I should have been up-front with him, honest. People always talk about how much it hurts to be betrayed, but what they really mean is that it hurts to be lied to.
When I was a kid, my parents had this policy where they didn’t punish me for being honest. If I broke a vase or a glass or got a bad grade at school, I wouldn’t get in trouble if I was open with them about it. I only got in trouble for lying, which meant I quickly learned not to do it.
“Everyone makes mistakes,” my dad told me. “If you’re honest about it, we can work through the problem together, but if you lie, how will I ever know I can trust you?”
That’s really what it comes down to, isn’t it?
Trust.
I betrayed Parker King’s trust. We’ve worked together for so long, been friends for so long, and until now, he’s never felt like I would betray him or lie to him.
Well, guess I proved him wrong.
I can lie.
I can deceive.
I can betray.
Only, I want a relationship with him and I don’t want it to be based on any of those negative things, so I need to get moving. After a restless night’s sleep, I wake up before my alarm and dress for the day. Parker might expect me to skip work or to avoid him, but I’m not that girl. I’d rather have a confrontation today and get everything out in the open then sulk around for weeks until we both forget about “the incident.”
I head inside and Heather’s jaw drops when she sees me. Apparently I dressed well this morning.
“Damn, Rose,” she says. “Big meeting today?”
“The biggest,” I say.
Heather holds out a lollipop, which I take. Diane appears beside her, also sucking on a lollipop, and gives me an approving look.
“You clean up nice, kid,” she says.
“I’m two years older than you,” I point out.
Diane just smiles and heads back to her office. She walks with a little bounce and even though she’s a brilliant engineer, I think it’s her playful attitude that makes her fun to work with and be around.
“Good luck today,” Heather says as I walk to the elevator.
“Thanks. I’m going to need it.”
I repeat the “What’s happening today?” conversation with Christina, then go to my office to drop off my purse and keys. Parker’s door is closed, but I can hear him moving around in there, and I know he probably arrived hours ago.
He’s like me that way. When he’s stressed, he needs to be at work. When he’s tired or anxious, he needs to do things with his hands. Depending on just how tense Parker is feeling, he’s probably finished all of our work for the rest of the week.
I take a deep breath, and then I go knock on Parker’s door.
Then I wait.
This is the moment of truth, isn’t it?
I know he knows it’s me.
He knows who’s at the door without anyone needing to announce themselves because he’s that good at telling our knocks apart. It’s a little creepy, to be honest, but it’s Parker.
“Come in, Rose.”
I push the door open and step inside. I close it behind myself. I don’t make eye contact right away because suddenly, my heart is pounding out of my chest. It’s beating so loudly that I’m sure the whole office can hear me.
“Look at me,” his voice is clear and sharp.
When I look at Parker, though, he doesn’t seem angry or even hurt. He just looks relieved. Can that be right? I thought I was going to have to beg, going to have to convince him that I’m not a liar who wants to hurt him. I’m not Janine. I’ll never be her. I’m different. I’m me.
“I’m sorry,” I tell him. I clasp my hands in front of myself and look at him. In his suit, he looks every bit the CEO. His beard is perfectly trimmed and his face is a mask. He’s great at negotiating because people can’t get a read on him.
But I’ve seen what’s beneath the suit.
I’ve seen the tattoos that mark his body in remembrance of the friends he’s lost. I’ve seen the way he looks when he takes off the mask of self-control. I’ve seen the way he moves when he’s not just the boss, but a lion ready to pounce.
I’ve seen all of that and I want to see it again.
I want more.
I want Parker King.
He starts walking across the room toward me and I open my mouth and start talking. I’m not even sure what the point of talking is or what I’m trying to say, but I’m going to try anyway.
“I fucked up. I should have told you about the dare. It’s just that I’m a huge wimp and kind of a dork and I’m awkward around men and I thought Stephanie was giving me the push I needed and I-”
He silences me with the kiss of a lifetime.
He silences me with his mouth and his tongue and his hands in my hair.
He silences me because in this moment, all we need is the silence.
All we need is each other.
And I know in this moment that Parker King is a bigger man than I thought.
He’s not going to let hurt feelings stop us from exploring this thing between us. He’s not going to give up just because we had a misunderstanding. He’s not going to give up just because the thing that brought us together was a little dare.
He’s still Parker.
He’s still the man I admire more than anyone else in the world.
He dominates the business world and now, judging by the look in his eye, he’s going to dominate me.
12
Parker
“On your knees, little flower,” I say. The words come out clipped and harsh, but Rose pulls out of my arms and drops to the floor without hesitation. I don’t know how much experience she has with power exchanges, but right now, there’s going to be a major one.
She looks perfect kneeling before me, like a little princess I’m about to defile, and I like it. I like knowing I’m going to take her, conquer her.
I like knowing I’m about to devour her.
She kneels there with her hands on her knees and her head bowed. She looks submissive, even demure. We both know it’s not real. This is just a game and it’s one we both want to play. Rose isn’t really submissive in real life. She bends to no man. The fact that she’s bending to me, in this moment, makes her kneeling even more meaningful.
The fact that she would willingly obey me in the bedroom – or in this case, my office – makes my dick hard and my heart swell.
“You look perfect, you know,” I murmur, slipping off my jacket. I toss it onto the desk and begin to take off my belt. She doesn’t move or react. She just continues kneeling for me, waiting for me to give her another command, another request.
Rose waits for me because she wants me, wants this, and I want it, too.
“If this is going to work between us, we’re going to have a lot of honest discussions,” I tell her. At that, she does look up. “Eyes down,” I tell her, and she quickly lowers her gaze, then closes her eyes. “We’re not going to have lies between us, darling. We aren’t going to have secrets. Do you understand?”
“Yes.” She licks her lips. I wonder if she knows how seductive she looks in this moment. “I understand.”
>
“Show me you understand,” I say. My cock is out now, hard and long, and I stroke it several times before Rose kneels up and presses her lips to it. I groan as she slides her tongue out and swirls it around the head of my cock.
Delicate.
Soft.
Gentle.
But I don’t want gentle right now.
I want everything she has to give.
All of it.
I need it, desire it.
“Oh, you can do better than that,” I taunt her. Rose’s eyes flash fire and I know she’s taking the bait. I know she’s about to show me what she can do. I know she’s about to show me how she can work a dick.
And she does.
She slides my length down her throat and swallows, sucking hard on my dick. She moves up and down, fondling my balls with her hands as she plays with me.
How many times have I fantasized about this exact moment? Far too many to count, and the truth is that the reality is better than anything I could have ever imagined.
“That’s it, baby,” I growl. “Fuck, your tongue feels so good on me.” She snickers as she continues to suck me. The sound comes out muffled, but yeah, it’s obvious that she’s snickering. I get the feeling Rose knows exactly how she affects me and I get the feeling that she loves it.
She loves feeling this power over me.
She loves feeling like I can’t do anything about the way she turns me on.
Well, it’s time for her to learn that two can play this game.
I grab her hair and pull, forcing her to look up at me.
“I need to be inside of you,” I tell her. She nods. Her mouth is still wrapped around my cock, still tight around my dick. She lets go of me and I help her to her feet. Then Rose kisses me. She wraps her arms around my neck and plays with my hair, strokes my beard, touches my cheek.
She kisses me softly, like a woman in love.
“Take off your clothes,” I tell her, and she stops kissing me.
“All of them?” Her voice is quiet.
“Now, baby.”
She steps back and begins to slowly undress. Each piece of clothing is carefully, slowly, tantalizingly removed. She tosses everything on the floor: not bothering to fold or hang the items up.
Good.
This is how I want her.
I want her wild and wanton and free.
I want her thinking about nothing except my cock.
Stroking my dick, I watch her undress for me. Her eyes are on me the entire time and that just makes me more excited, more anxious to be in her, more turned on for the moments to come.
When she’s naked, she stands there and waits for my next command, but I don’t have one.
I just want her.
All of her.
I sit in one of the chairs in front of my desk and motion for her to come to me. She walks over, swinging her hips as she does.
“Seductress,” I murmur.
“You love it.”
“I love everything about you.”
She blushes, but climbs onto my lap. Her hands find my shoulders and she steadies herself.
“Are you ready for me?” She whispers.
“Come on, baby.”
She lowers herself onto my length, groaning as I fill her.
“That’s it, little flower,” I murmur, gripping her ass. “Ride my cock, baby.”
“Fuck,” she hisses. Her breasts are bouncing in front of me and I reach out to pinch her nipples. Instantly, she squeezes my dick harder. I almost lose it right then, but somehow, I manage to maintain my dignity and avoid coming too soon.
I’m not some horny teenager on a first date.
This is me and Rose.
I want to make it good for her. Great for her.
As she rides me, I’m swept away with her. The moment is fucking hot, to be sure, but it’s more than that. It’s sweet and romantic and special because it’s with her. It’s with the woman I want more than anything else in the world.
It’s with the woman I love.
We come together, reaching our orgasms at the same time, and she melts into me. Rose lets her body fall against mine in the chair. Sweaty, sated, and happy, we hold each other, and I realize I never want this moment to end.
13
Rose
The day of the funeral is rainy, which seems appropriate for a sad occasion. Parker and I sit together in a pew in the back of the church while the preacher talks about Janine’s life and the legacy she leaves behind. Mike is in the front row of the church. He sits up straight, but he dabs his eyes throughout the ceremony, and I wonder how hard it is for him to keep it together right now.
After Janine and Parker broke up, Mike stopped showing up around the office, which is understandable, but he also completely checked out of Parker’s life. As far as I know, Parker hasn’t seen him since the breakup, and it’s got to hurt them both.
They were the best of friends.
About halfway through the funeral, Parker squeezes my hand, then gets up and walks down the center aisle to the front row. The preacher doesn’t stop talking, but a few heads turn as Parker sits down next to Mike. I see Mike turn and look at him with surprise, but then Parker wraps his arms around his old friend and just holds him, and Mike relaxes.
And they cry together.
Nothing about this is easy or simple or clean. Love never is. There’s no such thing as a clean breakup or a simple split. This just doesn’t exist because love is messy and hard and dirty. You play for keeps and you play to win, but what happens when you lose?
Today, there are no winners.
Today, we’re all losers.
The funeral ends and Mike and Parker talk for a long time. I sit in the pew and wait patiently, watching all of the mourners who came to pay their respects. Despite the fact that Janine broke Parker’s heart, I can’t bring myself to think of her as a bad person. We all make mistakes. We all make bad choices.
Hers just happened to have a pretty big impact on a lot of people.
Finally, the crowd disperses and Parker and I leave the church. We get in his car and drive off in silence. He takes us to a little diner that’s close to the church. By the time we arrive, the rain is coming down in sheets and I can barely see the neon lights of the restaurant.
“Are you ready?” He asks, turning off the engine. We both eye the rain warily.
“Ready as I’ll ever be.”
We get out of the car at the same time and run into the restaurant. We stand in the doorway for a second, dripping on the tile floors.
The diner is empty, save for a lone waitress who looks like she hasn’t had a day off in years. Her smile is genuine, but she’s got dark circles under her eyes, and she eyes the puddle in the doorway wearily.
“I’m sorry for the mess,” Parker says, stepping further into the restaurant. He hands her some cash and whispers something I can’t hear, but suddenly, the woman’s smile seems a little brighter. She disappears and Parker and I head to the last booth at the end of the diner.
We slide in on the same side and hold hands. I lay my head on his shoulder and just think about the day, the week, the year. So much has changed, yet he still offers me comfort and peace when everything around me feels like it’s in turmoil.
The waitress reappears with two hot cups of coffee and a couple of menus. We thank her and she heads to the front of the restaurant to start mopping up our mess.
“How are you holding up?” I finally ask Parker. Today couldn’t have been easy for him, couldn’t have been simple. I’m sure there are a lot of emotions he’s experiencing right now.
“I’ll be okay.” He pauses, then continues. “I feel bad for Mike. I’ve missed him. I don’t know if I realized just how much until today.”
We sit there for awhile, together in the silence. Sometimes silence is what you need. Sometimes silence is good, freeing. Sometimes it gives you a moment to clear your head and think about where you’ve come from, to think about where you’re going.
“He told me he had planned to propose to her next weekend while they were at the lake.”
Fuck.
“He never got his chance,” I say, the reality of it suddenly hitting me full force. Mike truly loved Janine, and he didn’t get a chance to tell her how he really felt. He didn’t have the chance to give her what he wanted: a promise of forever.
“He waited too long,” Parker agrees. “He wanted a perfect moment, but perfect moments don’t come naturally. You have to make them happen.”
Then Parker does something I don’t expect, something I never thought I’d see from him. Parker climbs out of the booth and gets on one knee, and then he takes my hand.
“Parker,” I whisper. “What are you doing?”
“I love you, Rose. You’re everything I’ve ever wanted. I always thought I was no good for you. I always thought you were out of my league, but I’ve come to realize that we’re perfect for each other. We both mess up and we both make mistakes and we have our faults, but I think we owe it to ourselves to try.”
“I love you, too, Parker,” I whisper. Now the tears are coming in full-force. I notice the waitress mopping at the door, and I think she’s wiping away a stray tear or two herself. “And I think you’re incredible. I can’t imagine my life without you. I can’t imagine going back to not having you around.”
“I want more than what we have, Rose. I want forever. I want you. I want you to marry me.”
He stands up and pulls me out of the booth and into his arms, then kisses me. We’re both still wet and cold, but somehow, the warmth in our hearts spreads to the rest of our bodies and suddenly, I think that everything is going to be okay.
“Marry me, Rose,” he whispers. “I dare you.”
“I’ve never been one to turn down a dare,” I whisper, and he kisses me once more.
Epilogue
Rose
The historic brick church is filled with people, flowers, and more people.