by Andrew Trees
For those on the prowl, I recommend Timothy Perper’s Sex Signals: The Biology of Love (Philadelphia: Isi Press, 1986) and David Givens’s Love Signals: A Practical Field Guide to the Body Language of Courtship (New York: St. Martin’s Press, 2004). For the lap dance study, see G. Miller, J. M. Tybur, and B. D. Jordan, “Ovulatory cycle effects on tip earnings by lap dancers: Economic evidence for human estrus?” Evolution and Human Behavior 28:6 (November, 2007): 375-381. For the power of eye contact, see D. Walsh and J. Hewitt, “Giving men the come-on: The effect of eye contact and smiling in a bar environment,” Perceptual and Motor Skills (December, 1985): 873-874. For a female’s fifty-two nonverbal signals for attracting a man’s attention, see Monica Moore, “Nonverbal courtship patterns in women: Context and consequences,” Ethology and Sociobiology 6:4 (1985): 237-247. For the different approaches to seduction, based on essays by men and women, see Perper, Sex Signals. For the affective shift that occurs after sex, see D. Buss and M. Haselton, “The affective shift hypothesis: The functions of emotional change following sexual intercourse,” Personal Relationships 8:4 (December, 2001): 1357-1369. For a historical overview of the changing rankings of what men and women want in a partner, see D. Buss, et al., “A half century of mate preferences: The cultural evolution of values,” Journal of Marriage and Family Life 63:2 (May, 2001): 491-504. For an analysis of humor’s effect on attractiveness, see S. B. Kaufman, et al., “The role of creativity and humor in mate selection” in Mating Intelligence: Sex, relationships, and the mind’s reproductive system, edited by Glenn Gehr and Geoffrey Miller (Philadelphia: Lawrence Erlbaum Associates, 2007). For how dopamine levels in rats decrease with each sexual encounter, see D. F. Fiorino, et al., “Dynamic changes in nucleus accumbens dopamine efflux during the Coolidge effect in male rats,” Journal of Neuroscience 17 (June, 1997): 4849-4855. For those interested in the brain in love, I recommend Helen Fisher’s Why We Love: The nature and chemistry of romantic love (New York: Henry Holt, 2004). For the groundbreaking study on smell, see C. Wedekind, et al., “MHC-dependent mate preferences in humans,” Proceedings of the Royal Society of London B, 260 (1995): 245-249. For women’s preference of creativity over wealth at peak fertility, see M. Haselton and G. Miller, “Women’s fertility across the cycle increases short-term attractiveness of creative intelligence,” Human Nature 17:1 (March, 2006): 50-73. For one study on men’s smell preference for women nearing their peak fertility, see R. Thornhill, et al., “Major histocompatibility complex genes, symmetry, body scent attractiveness in men and women,” Behavioral Ecology 14:5 (September, 2003): 668-678. For the lemon-scented rats, see T. J. Fillion and E. M. Blass, “Infantile experience with suckling odors determines adult sexual behavior in male rats,” Science 231 (1986): 729-731. For a possible genetic cause to promiscuity, see Edmund Rolls, The Brain and Emotion (New York: Oxford University Press, 2000). For a study on prairie voles and vasopressin, see C. Sue Carter, et al., “Physiological substrates of mammalian monogamy: The prairie vole model,” Neuroscience & Biobehavioral Reviews 19:2 (1995): 303-314.
For marital mavens, I am obviously a big John Gottman fan. He has written several accessible books, including Gottman, et al., Ten Lessons to Transform Your Marriage: America’s Love Lab Experts Share Their Strategies for Strengthening Your Relationship (New York: Crown, 2006) and Gottman and Nan Silver, The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work: A Practical Guide from America’s Foremost Relationship Expert (New York: Crown, 1999). Ted Huston’s PAIR project can be found on the web at http://www.utexas.edu/research/pair/ourresearch/index.html. For our general ineptitude at judging marital satisfaction, see R. Ebling and R. Levenson, “Who are the marital experts?” Journal of Marriage and Family 65:1 (February, 2003): 130- 142. For the benefits of perceiving one’s partner as better than he or she is, see S. Murray, “The quest for conviction: Motivated cognition in romantic relationships,” Psychological Inquiry 10:1 (1999), 23-33. For the value of wearing rose-colored glasses when viewing one’s husband, see M. Hawkins, et al., “Marital sentiment override: Does it influence couples’ perceptions?” Journal of Marriage and Family 64:1 (February, 2002): 193-201. For the tendency of partners to look more like each other over time, see R. B. Zajonc, et al., “Convergence in the physical appearance of spouses,” Motivation and Emotion 11:4 (December, 1987): 335-346.
This list includes only a few general overviews and the studies that receive more in-depth exploration in Decoding Love. I have left out a great deal of outstanding work, much of it appearing as articles in scholarly journals. In all honesty, I have been a pygmy standing on the shoulders of giants, and I have greatly appreciated the boost.
Index
affairs. See infidelity
age
preferences
shrinkage of dating pool
Albee, Edward
Allen, Woody, Annie Hall
Are Men Necessary? (Dowd)
Aron, Arthur
arousal
misinterpretation of signals
preceding desire
priming with fear
sensuality of viewed images
arranged marriages
attraction
expectations
men’s misinterpretations
obstacles
to opposite-sex friends
to others, while in relationship
susceptibility to priming
See also barroom encounters
attractiveness
of body vs. face
clothing and
as genetic fitness indicator
importance of
innate preference for
market value
men’s behavior and
during ovulation
proximity to attractive people and
sex of children and
similar levels of
societal advantages
babies. See children
Baker, Robin
barroom encounters
advice for men
advice for men and women
advice for women
initiation of touching
men’s oblivion to signals
nonverbal signals
reluctant males
stages of courtship
time of night
turnoffs
women’s control of
beauty. See attractiveness
Becker, Gary
Bleske, April
body chemistry
fecundity within extended family
male hormonal fluctuations
body chemistry (cont.)
neurochemistry
Oedipal attraction
ovulation and fertility cycle
smells
body language
as bulk of communication
facial animation
facial leaks
first impressions
five stages of courtship
hand gestures
men’s oblivion to
oblique signals
smiles
synchrony
variety and frequency of signals
women’s cognizance of
body size
effect of fragrance on perception of
in polygamous species
preferences
brain
habituation to positive feelings
hugs and
Machiavellian intelligence theory
memory
monogamy and
reasoning
responses to infatuation
responses to neutral conversations
sexual differences in physical structure
sexual selection theory
space devoted to sex
See also intelligence
breasts
Brizendine, Louann
Buss, David
on human evolutionary purpose
infidelity rate estimate
on man’s valuation of attractiveness
on women
’s valuation of sincerity
cheap sperm-precious egg distinction
cheating. See infidelity
Chemistry.com
children
abuse by stepparents
couple’s relationship and
daughters, likelihood of having
monogamy and
pair-bonding and
parental investment theory
parents’ degree of kinship and
paternity
sons, likelihood of divorce and
sperm competition and
chimpanzees
duration of coitus
grooming
humans’ similarity to
multiple ejaculations
penis size
social order
testicle size
choice
analysis of preferences
immobilizing effect of
irrevocability of
life choices, potential dating pool and
poor choices
choosiness
attractiveness of
marriage and
men vs. women
parental investment theory
tolerance of annoying habits
Clark, Neil
commitment
feminism and
men’s lies about
perception of attractiveness and
similar sexual past and
value of
communication
conversation turnoffs
decline of
fighting
language and verbal skills
marital therapy techniques
negative emotional expression
overanalysis of
pickup lines
predictors of marital success
voice pitch
See also body chemistry; body language
competition
among women
female promiscuity and
in polygamous and monogamous societies
Red Queen situations
sperm competition
threat display
See also sexual selection
conservadate.com
consumerism
abundance of choices
bad choices
envy
irrevocable choices
satisficers and maximizers
See also market theory
contraceptives
Coolidge effect
creativity
Cresswell, Clio
cryptic female choice
Darwin, Charles
dateamillionaire.com
dating. See barroom encounters
dating pool
life choices and
for older women
dating sites. See Internet dating
deception
about sexual past
facial leaks
faked orgasms
in Internet dating
men’s proclivity for
prevalence of
punishment for
self-deception
smiles
social manipulation
women’s cognizance of
women’s vulnerability to
demographic shift in dating pool
Descent of Man (Darwin)
desire
following arousal
neurochemical effects
waning of
Devore, Irven
de Waal, Frans
divorce
arranged marriages and
birth of sons and
cohabitation and
dollar equivalent
predictors of
rate of
women’s economic success and
dollar auctions
dopamine
Dowd, Maureen
dowry problem
dress, attractiveness and
durability bias
Ebling, Rachel
economic theory. See consumerism; market theory
education level preferences
egg/sperm distinction
eHarmony
Ekman, Paul
Ellis, Bruce
Ellis, Mark
emotion
in affairs
attachment after first sexual encounter
brain response
expression of
female orgasm and
in sexual fantasies
envy
erotica and pornography
evolutionary theory. See genetic fitness indicators; sexual selection; specific issues
expectations
of marriage
power of
romantic story line
eye contact
face shape
face-to-face copulation
facial expressions
animation of
leaks revealing deception
similarity of, in married couples
smiles
women’s cognizance of
familiarity effect
fantasies
fat. See weight
fear, arousal and
Female Brain, The (Brizendine)
female orgasm
female proceptivity
feminism
economic success
education level
life-satisfaction gap
men’s attitudes about