Thank God.
I would never forgive myself if I decided it was more important to go out and have fun selfishly, if she suffered in some way. I was okay though, when he told me to go ahead and give my parents a call to check on her. My mom said she was fine. I was anxious to see her.
Wearing a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt along with a pair of sneakers, I climbed into Nicholas’ car for the ride. I guess I was more tired than I thought. During the trip I must have dozed off. When I woke the car door was being opened. Nicholas stood in the door just looking at me. He reached out, grabbing my face in my hands.
“Sweetheart, I need for you to prepare yourself for what you’re about to see.”
“What’s wrong?”
That’s when I noticed the flashing lights and people milling around. I pushed him out of the way and stood up. It took a few moments for my brain to register what my eyes were seeing before I collapsed to the ground.
There, on fire, was the heap of crumbling wood and ash that was all that was left of my house. The house that I had bought, coveted, and was proud to call mine. All the things I lost could be replaced. Most of the things that meant the world to me were at Nicholas’ house. That wasn’t the point though—this place was mine. All mine and now it was gone.
Alex was with me in moments, helping me up, holding me tight. Luke had a police officer standing in front of me talking. I wasn’t even paying attention to anything happening. Hearing phrases like “total loss” and “arson” had me turning for the nearest piece of grass and losing what was left of my dinner all over the ground.
“You have insurance, we’ll rebuild,” Alex said
“It’s not the same. That porch meant everything.”
“We’ll rebuild the porch. Nicholas, tell her we’ll rebuild the porch.”
“Sweetheart,” he said, crouching down next to me. “I’ll build you a brand new house complete with a porch that goes all the way around the house.
“Who would do this, Nicholas? Who would destroy what I worked so hard for? I don’t understand.”
“I don’t know, but I’m going to find out. I swear to you.”
Struggling out of his grasp, all the anger I had built up in me just started to come to the surface. He tried to hold on tighter, but I started to push.
“Let me go,” I said.
“No, sweetheart. I’m not going to let you go.”
“Let go of me,” I yelled.
Taking a step back, I looked up at him. “Ever since you came back in my life, you’ve pulled a gun on me, someone’s tried to kidnap me, one of your exes was hideous about our daughter, and now my house has been destroyed. Everything horrible that’s happened to me somehow comes back to involve you. Explain this to me, Nicholas. Why do people I don’t even know want me to suffer when I didn’t do anything?” I cried, tears streaming down my face. I tried frantically to wipe them away before they could soak the front of my shirt, but it was a lost cause.
“Sweetheart…” he began, but I cut him off.
“Don’t sweetheart me, Nicholas. Someone wants me dead and the only thing different is that you are here. What’s next—a sniper takes me out with a bullet? Or our daughter while we’re out playing with her?”
“What are you saying?”
“I’m saying that…I’m saying I don’t want this anymore.”
Nicholas stood stunned. “You don’t want this anymore because your house caught fire?”
Somehow, I gathered so much strength and guts at this moment that I wasn’t going to back down. “This is bigger than just my house catching on fire, Nicholas. This…” I said, waving my hand toward the scene that was unfolding. “This fire is just the icing on the cake. I don’t know why I fooled myself into thinking that all of this was going to be okay.”
“It is going to be okay. I’m going to keep you safe. I gave you my word.”
I shook my head, I couldn’t believe this. “If I had your word, then none of this stuff should have been able to touch me. It’s touched me, Nicholas. It’s destroyed everything I worked hard for.”
A car screeched to a halt behind us, a door slammed. I barely recognized my dad’s voice as he screamed for Alex and me. I turned around and ran to him. Being safe in his arms, the dam burst and I was inconsolable. I could hear the rumblings of an argument but I burrowed myself deeper into my dad’s chest. I was passed from my dad to another. It wasn’t until he picked me up that I looked to see who it was.
My brother Ethan came to the rescue whenever I needed him. He was always there for me.
“I’m sorry, Angel. I got back as soon as I could,” he said, helping me into the backseat of his car. “Lock the doors,” he said and I did.
Ethan was screaming, Nicholas was screaming and trying to get to the car. I was shaking and freaked out. I started to scream for them to stop and they just got louder. When the passenger door opened slowly, I turned and jumped.
“Shhhh,” Alex said, placing her finger over her lips.
Shutting the door, Alex used the keys she had to start the car and pull off with no one the wiser. I didn’t even bother to look back, I didn’t care. It was like Alex could read my mind…she drove us straight to our parents’. I jumped out of the car as soon as we were stopped, running for the door. I ran up and hugged my mom before leaving her standing there to run through the house and up to the room they made up for Layla.
Picking up her still sleeping form, I cradled her in my arms before sitting in the rocking chair. I held her tightly to my chest and wept. Wept for the loss of my house, the almost loss of myself, and for the loss of Nicholas. Just when I thought everything was going perfect, something like this happened and you began to question if any of this was right to begin with.
I knew I loved him, but I knew I couldn’t love him enough to stand with him as the dangers kept happening around us. I feared for Layla’s safety and the safety of my parents. I wasn’t kidding when I mentioned losing my life via sniper. I found myself wanting to be in a room with no windows, always trying to figure out if a gunman could possibly shoot into whatever room I happened to be in.
Not taking the chance, I got up slowly, walked into the furthest corner and slid down it. I would sit here for as long as it took and pray to God someone was able to catch up to the person or persons who thought that my life wasn’t worthy of being on earth.
I didn’t know how long I sat there when I realized I wasn’t alone anymore. Ethan came in and sat with me, taking Layla from my arms.
“You want to tell me why you’re sitting here in the dark, in the corner?”
Wiping the last of the tears that had fallen away from my cheeks, I looked at him. “I’m afraid. I didn’t want to sit by a window for fear that someone could have a gun out there, ready to shoot me.”
“I don’t think someone would go that far, Angel. Besides, you’re safe here.”
“I don’t think I’ll ever be safe—I don’t think I’ll ever feel safe. After all of this, I feel like I’m going to spend the rest of my life looking over my shoulder.”
“Well, I don’t think that’s going to happen. I think that this is going to be resolved sooner rather than later.”
“You don’t know that, Ethan.”
“You’re right, I don’t know that for sure. However, I know how angry Dad was just now. Dad was on the phone, cursing uncontrollably in Italian. He’s ordered you a full security detail. You’ll be more protected than the president by the time he’s done.
I lay my head on Ethan’s shoulder, so exhausted. “Do you think Mom and Dad will let me stay here?”
“Of course they will. I doubt Mom and Dad will let either of you out of their sight.”
“Okay,” I said, giving a big huge yawn.
I must have fallen asleep at some point. I remember the feeling of floating, being weightless. I struggled to stop whatever was going on, but my body refused to move. I snuggled into a warm deep sleep that ended up being filled with horrible dreams. I
dreamt of my house being on fire, watching Layla being taken away, kidnapped by a faceless man that intended to do me harm. All of this horror and nothing jolted me awake.
The last thing I remember is seeing Nicholas’ face. Nicholas holding Layla, rocking her to sleep. Nicholas stood handsomely at the end of the bed, removing his clothes, ready to make love to me before he disappeared into a black void.
I wasn’t going to be able to handle any of this.
***
Nicholas
Watching Christianna thrash and whimper all over the bed when I couldn’t do anything about it angered me. Alex wouldn’t let me near the bed or her, as she was afraid she’d find out that this house wasn’t safe, either.
“I love you, sweetheart,” I whispered. “I’m going to make everything right.”
I took one more look at her before I left her room. Walking downstairs, I came upon a sight I didn’t expect. My father, Christianna’s father, and her brother staring at me. I knew I was going to have to answer a lot of questions.
“Is she okay, son?”
“No, she’s having nightmares. I didn’t wake her though.”
“She’s fucking terrified,” Ethan said.
“Ethan, language.”
“Sorry, Dad, you don’t understand. I had to sit up there with my baby sister as she sat huddled in a corner, scared to death that some guy could be outside the window ready to shoot her. She’s been through so much in her life—she shouldn’t be going through this too.”
“Do you think I want her to? Do you think I enjoyed having to tell her someone was trying to break into her house with a kidnap kit, or that she had to be there to watch as her house was burning? Or how about me standing there while she ran to someone else for comfort, after blaming me for what happened?” I took a deep breath and a step forward.
“I love her. I think I loved her from the moment I met her. So I’ll tell you this once and only once. I will find out who’s behind this and I will make them pay.”
“We’ve seen what can happen since you’ve been back in her life, Nico. How can you expect to make it better now?”
I knew what I was going to say would essentially anger the two of them before I explained, so I just came out and said it.
“She’ll no longer be staying with me, she made a public display showing everyone around that she doesn’t trust me. With that being said, we need to use that to our advantage. The only people I trust with her safety right now are in this room. Bobby and Luke would never let any harm come to her, so Antony Balducci is our wild card. No one would see him coming and his reach runs deep.”
“What you’re saying is that to people on the outside, it’s going to look like you aren’t together anymore.”
“Exactly. People are going to see that her security rivals the president, knowing that security comes with her father’s career. I’ll take a step back, but I’ll be watching. I’ll probably go off the grid for a while, let people think I’ve gone out of the country. All the while I’ll be close, I’ll be digging into everything. I won’t give up until this is over.”
“And what about Layla?”
“I’m still her father,” I said, directly to Alex.
“I know you’re her father, Nico. That little girl has gotten used to you being around, now you’re going to just up and disappear. How do you think that’s going to go over? No offense, but soon she’ll be talking and walking. You’re going to kick yourself if you aren’t around to see it. We don’t know how long any of this is going to last.”
I didn’t think of the ramifications of my absence and what it would cause to my relationship with both Christianna and Layla. I was thinking purely of the revenge aspect, not consequences.
“When you do this, Christianna’s going to be convinced that you’ve left her. You’re going to have to understand that things may not be so easy to get back, that she probably won’t understand why you both have split up.”
“She blamed me, Alex. She blamed me for everything. This is the only way to separate the two so we can figure out where this is coming from. I spoke about his with Luke and Bobby. We think whoever is responsible was probably close. They saw her get mad and leave, which means they’re probably convinced that we’re over. All I’m saying is I want to make them believe that, so tomorrow I’m going to resume my life as it was before Christianna came back in it and the only people that will know the truth are standing right here. I’m going to go to the clubs, go through the city, and be seen with women. I’ll be living my life like she doesn’t exist anymore, to see who takes notice. Whoever it is, hopefully they’ll be so brazen that they’ll tip their hand. And when they do, I will be right there to ruin whoever it is.”
“Nico, I’m with Alex on this. How are you going to keep your connection to Layla? I mean I’ve heard from Christianna and Alex both about how she is with you,” Jonathan said.
“Jonathan, I wish I could express to you exactly how hard this is for me. I would give anything to just be able to go up there and take both of them home. I don’t know if I will be able to keep up the charade, knowing how much they both mean to me. However, this isn’t about me anymore. This is about them and their safety, which right now is all that matters to me.”
“So you’re willing to give Layla and me up, so we’ll be safe?”
This time it was her voice, the voice that rocked me to my core, the voice that could make me fall to my knees with just a syllable. I looked at her. She looked so tired, her eyes were puffy, causing my heart to hurt, knowing that she’d been crying. Her question worried me.
“Sweetheart, I told you I’d do anything for the both of you—I meant it. I am so fucking sorry that it got this far. I’m sorry that someone destroyed your house. Seeing you today after that killed part of me, so it may seem like I’m leaving you but I’m not. I’ll still be here, just not here.”
She stared at me for a few moments, as if she was trying to figure out what to say next, and when she did, she shocked the hell out of me.
“I’m sorry, it’s not your fault. I’m sorry I blamed you for something you had no control over. I was hurt and upset—please will you accept my apology?”
“Of course, as long as you can accept mine. I’m sorry I let anyone get that close to burn your house.”
“I forgive you,” she said low.
Watching her walk down the stairs, I couldn’t take my eyes off of her. I wanted to scoop her up, grab Layla, and run away to some deserted island, let this shit play out with the two of them hidden and protected.
“Daddy?”
“Yes, Angel?”
“Can your guys keep me safe?”
“Yes, they will keep you safe.”
“Okay,” she said before turning back to me. “I want you to do what you have to do, but I want you to make a promise to me that no matter what you will spend some time every day with Layla. If she has to be taken to you or you have to sneak around, you need to see her as much as she needs to see you.”
“I will.”
“Then let’s make this seem like we’re not together anymore. I just hope you’re right because I don’t like the thought of being without you, either.
I did the only thing I thought was right. I wrapped my arms around her, hugging her tightly. Her body was shaking a little, the front of my shirt felt a little wet. She was crying, it made me want to rip someone’s head off.
“Come on, I’ll take you upstairs.” I turned to the others. “I’ll be back, I just want her to go to bed.”
Our dads and Ethan nodded. I picked her up for what I had resigned would be the last time. Christianna tucked her face into my chest as I held her. She left the door to her room open so I was able to walk through with ease.
“How did you know this was the room I was in?” she asked as I placed her gently on the bed.
“I was in here earlier.”
“I thought I dreamt about you being here.”
Sitting down on the bed next to her, I took
her hands in mine. “Are you sure you’re going to be okay with this?”
Shaking her head. “No, I just got you back.”
“I know, sweetheart. I won’t repeat the same things that I said before. You know how I feel, you and Layla are my heart. This is going to end soon, you’ll be safe when it does.”
“I do trust you, Nicholas,” she cried.
“Shhhhhh don’t do that, don’t cry anymore. You continue crying and all of my resolve will wear away, I’ll be useless. Now, may I have a kiss? Even though I don’t want to, I have to get going.”
She didn’t wait, or hesitate. She leaned in and kissed me slow with languid strokes of her tongue, the erotic dance of our mouths made me completely hard.
Christianna pulled me to her. I lay down between her legs, kissing her again. I pulled back to just stare at her.
“As much as I would love to make you come right here and now, to enjoy some much needed make-up sex, I don’t think it’s going to be appropriate in your parents’ house.” She nodded, so I pulled her to sit up with me.
“I’ll call you. I’ll come by tomorrow. I may not call on my phone number so you have to be prepared.”
“I will.”
“Goodnight, sweetheart. I hope your dreams are better than they were when I was in here earlier.
“Me too.”
She lay down and I covered her up with the blanket, kissing her forehead one last time before I left. Standing up and walking to the door, I was almost out when I heard her voice.
“Nicholas?”
I turned, holding the door. “Yeah?”
“I love you.”
It took everything I had in me not to run back over there. I had to remember my objective, I needed to be ready to take care of what I needed to. “I love you too, sweetheart,” I said and then left the room.
Heading down the steps with purpose, I looked at everyone in the room before my gaze landed on my father.
Can't Walk Away (The Thomas Family Chronicles #1) Page 16