The cheers from the audience were deafening, and Arielle shed a few more tears. I wiped them away with my thumb and pulled her into a hug, kissing the side of her head. Then I tried to stand up and immediately realized that kneeling down while seven months pregnant wasn’t the world’s best idea. Ezra chuckled as he bent down to help me up.
“Thank you so much for coming out tonight, Ashview!” I said to the crowd once I was back on my feet. “Have a great rest of your night and drive safe!”
I led my fiancé and daughter offstage, and as soon as we were in the wings, Ezra pulled me into a kiss.
“I love you so much,” he said against my lips.
“I love you too,” I told him, then bent down to hug Arielle again. “And I love you, sweet girl. To the moon and back.”
“Can I call you my mom now, Daphne?” she asked me.
My eyes stung with tears. “You can call me whatever you want to.”
“I love you, Mommy,” she murmured as she wrapped her arms around me and burrowed herself into my side.
I couldn’t contain my tears anymore. I wrapped an arm around Ezra and laid my head against his chest; he put an arm around each of us and kissed my hair.
I’d been to hell and back in the past ten months. I’d been terrorized by a faceless monster, I’d feared for my life, and I’d almost been a serial killer’s next victim. But I’d always believed that things happened for a reason. And now I knew that was true. Because all of the trauma and heartache had led me to Ezra and Arielle.
Life wasn’t a fairy tale. It was real and messy and ugly, and sometimes it hurt like hell. But fairy tale endings? Those were absolutely possible. And I’d found mine.
(PSST! Want a free bonus epilogue about Daphne and Ezra’s wedding? CLICK HERE!)
I know who I am
And I know where I stand
I can fall a hundred times
But my wings will not be tied
And they can try all they want
But I will not be broken
I’m the queen of the angels
I speak for those who don’t have a voice
I stand with the broken
My voice will rise above the noise
We will not be quiet
You will hear our cries
No one can silence
When millions unite
I’m the queen of the angels
No matter what they say
Don’t let them wreck your day
Your crown should always shine
Your heart can’t be denied
And they can try all they want
But you will not be broken
You’re the queen of the angels
You can speak for those who don’t have a voice
You can stand with the broken
Your voice will rise above the noise
We will not be quiet
They will hear our cries
No one can silence
When millions unite
You’re the queen of the angels
I’m the queen of the angels
We’re the queens of the angels
© Laura John 2020
These are songs that were either mentioned in the book or inspired my writing process.
Listen on Spotify!
“Get the Party Started” by P!nk
“All the Girls Love Alice” by Elton John
“You Sexy Thing” by Hot Chocolate
“Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This)” by Eurythmics
“Radio Gaga” by Queen
“Don’t You Want Me” by The Human League
“Pour Some Sugar on Me” by Def Leppard
“Love Is a Battlefield” by Pat Benatar
“Never Gonna Give You Up” by Rick Astley
“Heartbreak Beat” by Psychedelic Furs
“Take on Me” by a-Ha
“Head Over Heels” by Tears for Fears
“Love Is an Open Door” from Frozen
“Party in the U.S.A.” by Miley Cyrus
“Baba O’Riley” by The Who
“I Feel the Earth Move” by Carole King
“Happy” by Pharrell Williams
“Let It Go” from Frozen
“Crazy for You” by Madonna
“Your Song” by Elton John
“Walk Me Home” by P!nk
“Jizz in My Pants” by The Lonely Island
“The Fame” by Lady Gaga
“Try” by P!nk
Oh, my God! This book was so much fun to write. In the most torturous way possible. LOL!!!
Falling Angel was the first book I’ve ever committed to writing without having a clear idea of a story for it. It was almost a year ago when my amazing friends—the rest of the authors in this awesome series—first started tossing around the idea of writing a series together. I immediately knew that I wanted to be a part of it because I absolutely loved the idea of taking the unlikely friendship that this group of strong women from all different walks of life have formed and embellishing the hell out of it through the characters we’d create. These women are my tribe, the people I know are always there through thick and thin, just like all of Daphne’s friends are her tribe, and getting to fictionalize our friendship has been so much fun and so rewarding. The series this book was originally part of is no more and most of the character names have been changed because of that, but that doesn’t make these characters any less real to me. They’re still a perfect representation of the friends I’ve found in these ladies.
So, how did this book turn into the polished piece you have today? Through a lot of meltdowns, blood, sweat, and tears. I’d already been tossing around the idea of a rock star romance with the gender roles swapped for a while. Every rock star romance I’ve ever read has had the man as the rock star. But how many kick-ass female rock stars are out there? Why don’t they ever get any representation on the page? I wanted to change that.
So, Daphne DeVille, international rock icon, was born. And she was the one who told me that her hero was her security guard, and that he was a single dad of an adorable little girl, and that she had a stalker.
I loved everything Daphne was telling me, so I ran with the story…except that I had ZERO plot ideas.
Just like I did when I got stuck with My Dreams Are Sealed, I decided to stop resisting plotting so much and just plot out this damn book. And let me just tell you something. If you saw my original plot idea for this book, you would have been like, “Um, Carmen, what the hell is this shit? You wanted to write and publish that?” Well…no. I even knew it was weak and horrible as I was writing it out. But I had to start somewhere, right? And I did like some of the stuff I came up with, so I started to write what I’d plotted.
And that was when the magic happened. As my characters so often do, Daphne and Ezra took the wheel and told me a completely different story. A way better one. There’s a meme that circulates around the writing community every so often that says something to the effect of, “You create your characters. You spend all this time crafting their personalities and you nurture them and give them a safe place to grow. And then…they BETRAY you! The bastards run off in a completely different direction than you wanted them to go in. And the most annoying part is, it’s usually better.” That was definitely the case here.
One thing that did stay the same throughout the entire plotting and writing process was Arielle. Certain parts of the plot with her changed, but I always knew she was a huge part of the story. Ezra made that VERY clear to me from the get-go. And I was actually really excited about that aspect of this story because I’d never written a single parent before and I was looking forward to testing those waters. However, I struggled for a while with Arielle’s age because Ezra kept telling me that he was Daphne’s age—twenty-five—but he also kept telling me that his daughter was eight. And I was like, “But wait! That would mean that you were seventeen when she was born!” His response? “Well, aren’t you smart? You can do math and stuff. Yep. That’s my story. D
eal with it.” So I dealt with it, and I’m so glad I did, because I seriously love everything about Ezra’s relationship with Arielle.
Something that DID change in this story? Daphne’s sexual identity. I didn’t go into this story intending to write a bisexual character. I knew that Daphne was going to end up hooking up with someone in her dressing room and that Ezra was going to hear it and get jealous, but my original plan was for it to be a man. And she just shut up on me. She kept telling me that she didn’t do one-night stands and that wasn’t right. Then I tried to make it a member of her band, or even a member of the security team, and she still didn’t like it.
Then I was trying to plot something out for the next Sealed With a Kiss book, My Pride Is Sealed (which is going to be my first F/F romance), and it was like a lightbulb moment. I went back to Daphne and asked, “Is this what you were trying to tell me? It was a woman? You’re bi?” And she was like, “Took you long enough, woman!” And then she started talking to me again.
With this new piece of information, for a while, I thought I needed to have Daphne and Ezra have a conversation about her being bi, or at least that maybe he needed to struggle with it and worry that one day he wouldn’t be enough for her anymore. But everywhere I tried to put it in, it always felt forced and unnatural. I finally realized that was Ezra’s way of telling me that he didn’t need to have that conversation with her. Because he just didn’t care. He didn’t judge her, ask questions, or even bat an eye when she told him she was bi in the beginning of the book. He loved and accepted her exactly as she was, and he didn’t feel the need to talk to her about her sexuality because when she chose him, that was all that mattered. And I have to say, I kind of love that.
Okay, now comes the part I’m sure you’re all waiting for me to explain. What the heck was up with me throwing that Hugh chapter in there out of left field???
After everything that Hugh put Daphne through in this book, I knew that when the final confrontation happened between them, it needed to be scary and intense and worthy of all of the build-up that had happened to get us to that point. But the problem was, I couldn’t make it come out right when I was writing it from either Daphne’s perspective or from Ezra’s.
Then I saw a post in a friend’s reader group where she was talking about having a scene or a chapter written from a dead character’s point of view, and even though what my friend was talking about was something completely different, it started the cogs in my head turning. Why couldn’t I write that chapter from Hugh’s point of view? Give us a little glimpse into his dark and depraved mind before I killed him? I ran the idea past my trusty alphas, and they fell in love with it, so I decided to just roll with it. And I am SO glad I did, because it came out so much better than I’d ever hoped for. He was slimy and creepy, and he ended up telling me that he was a freaking serial killer! What the hell? I definitely didn’t expect THAT! I actually kind of creeped myself out writing that chapter, truth be told.
I do have a funny story I want to tell from writing that chapter, though. If you’re active in my reader group…the saga of Carmen’s iPod continues in probably the most hilariously timed song shuffle ever. If you have no idea what I’m talking about, I keep my iPod on shuffle when I write and just let it play what it wants to play. And doing that led to probably one of the skeeviest moments in Hugh’s chapter. So here I am writing this chapter and what song comes on my iPod? “Jizz in My Pants” by The Lonely Island. Yep. I am not kidding. That’s why Hugh, well, jizzed in his pants. Because that song came on my iPod and I was like, “OMG YESSSSS!!! That’s perfect!” Yeah, I know, I’m a deeply disturbed individual. Haha.
One last note about this book. It won’t be for a little while because I’ve got books planned out, but after relentless begging from some of my alphas and betas, you’ll be getting a couple of other stories from characters in this book: Sam and Garth, as well as Rachel and Hector. I already have a pretty good idea of Sam and Garth’s story, but Rachel and Hector’s story needs a little work. And I’ve been debating a story for Jill too, but I don’t know if that’ll happen or not.
Now comes the part where I thank everyone who made this book possible. And this time around, it took a village!
As always, my endlessly patient boyfriend, Brett. Thank you for helping me narrow my focus and channel all of the ideas that were swimming in my head into something coherent. And thank you for putting up with my writing and mood swings while I was going crazy with this book!
Laura: Daphne’s story quite literally would not be the same without you. I honestly don’t even know how to thank you for everything you contributed to this book. Thank you so much for letting me borrow your amazing characters from the Love in Sienna series and letting Daph join the Transcendent Management family! I hope I took good care of Mikey, Tia, Crystal, and Damon and did them justice. Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU for writing and recording the lyrics to “Queen of the Angels” for me, since a songwriter, I am not. I’m not even lying. I cried listening to your recording because it was exactly what was in my head, but I couldn’t get it out. And thank you for beta reading!
Beck: Thank you for alpha reading! Thank you for throwing plot ideas around with me and encouraging me to take a chance on the Hugh chapter. And thank you for letting me go crazy with Taylor in this story! Daph needed all of her besties in this book, but she really needed her person to smack her upside the head and tell her she was being an idiot. And leave her a shit ton of condoms in her hotel room. LOL!!! Also, this is your official statement: Ezra Ramsay, in all of his sexy and slightly dorky glory, is all yours.
Jacinta: Thank you for beta reading and restoring some confidence that was lost. I really wasn’t sure how I felt about this book, but seeing how much you loved Daphne and Ezra’s story as you were beta reading made me fall in love with it again.
Amanda: Thank you for beta reading and being so critical! Seriously. Thank you. That was what I needed. Someone who wasn’t afraid to be brutally honest and ask the hard questions. And someone who found those little plot holes and inconsistencies that I couldn’t see because I was too close to it. Just for that, though he is very different from what you kept picturing, I am officially giving you the rights to one Garth O’Brien. You’ve been Garthed!
Claudia: Thank you for beta reading! And thank you for your advice on single parenthood and how to make Ari’s reactions believable. As much as I was excited to write this story, I was a little lost when it came to how to realistically write a kid’s reaction to things like her dad dating again and finding out that she was getting a new baby brother or sister and moving to a different city. And here is your official statement: Hector Gonzalez, who you fell in love with just from seeing his name three times, is all yours.
Katey: Thanks for being so willing to toss around ideas with me, even when you had no idea what the heck I was talking about half the time! And thanks for proofreading! Even the Grammar Nazi isn’t always perfect.
Stefanie: Thank you for helping me condense my crazy long blurb into something manageable and catchy. You seriously worked magic on Daphne’s half!
You: Yes, you. Whoever you are. Thanks so much for taking a chance on Daphne and Ezra’s story. If this is your introduction to my writing, I hope you’ll check out my other stories. If you’ve already read them all and you’re waiting with bated breath for the next one, I’ve started working on Maddie and Autumn’s story in the Sealed With a Kiss series, My Pride Is Sealed, and I anticipate a fall release if all goes well!
If you enjoyed this book, I’d love it if you’d take a moment to leave a review on your favorite book review site! Thanks, and I’ll see you next book!
Sealed With a Kiss Series
My Lips Are Sealed (Zoe #1)
My Heart Is Sealed (Zoe #2)
My Future Is Sealed (Zoe #3)
My Fate Is Sealed (Elijah #1)
My Bonds Are Sealed (River & Mason)
My Soul Is Sealed (Elijah #2)
My Dreams Are Sealed (Eli
jah #3)
My Pride Is Sealed (Maddie & Autumn—Coming Fall 2020)
My Past Is Sealed (Kelly & Shane—Coming Winter 2020)
My Choice Is Sealed (Abby & Nick—Release TBD)
Our Years Are Sealed (Megan & Rob—Release TBD)
My Role Is Sealed (Grant & Bryce—Release TBD)
Our Worlds Are Sealed (Beth & Gabby—Release TBD)
My Doors Are Sealed (Sadie & Keith—Release TBD)
Our Parts Are Sealed (Colleen & Kevin—Release TBD)
My Passion Is Sealed (Emma & Jake—Release TBD)
Game of Love Series
What Doesn’t Kill You (Kyler & Ian)
Under My Skin (Gabrielle & Braden—Coming Spring 2021)
Playing for Keeps (Melissa & Liam—Release TBD)
Finding My Spirit (Hannah & Travis—Release TBD)
Changing My Rhythm (Izzie & Hillary—Release TBD)
Carmen Richter is an independent romance author who writes as a labor of love. She writes contemporary romance in a bunch of different subgenres, featuring swoony heroes with a soft side who would do anything for the girls they love. Carmen also has an editing and formatting service called CPR Editing, which aims to provide affordable editing and interior formatting for all authors. When she’s not writing or editing, she loves going to the movies and attending concerts and live theater. She lives in the Kansas City area with her boyfriend, Brett, and their fur babies, a bunny named Marty and a cat named Mal.
Carmen loves interacting with her fans and will happily respond to all messages personally until she gets uber famous and gets a ton of them. Hey, a girl can dream, right?
You can find Carmen online in the following places:
Website
Blog
Facebook Page
Richter’s Romance Readers (Facebook Reader Group)
Falling Angel Page 36