by Nina Levine
“Vegas, anyone who’s important to you is important to me. But in answer to your question, yes, I like her. I imagine she’ll frustrate the hell out of me the same as you do, but I respect a woman who doesn’t take shit, and Monroe strikes me as that kind of woman.”
He had me at “anyone who’s important to you is important to me.” That was what family did for each other. And it was exactly what I needed to hear. Family was everything.
45
Nitro
“Broken” by Seether
The sound of my boots on the hospital lino was the only noise to be heard as I made the long trek to Marilyn’s room. I’d spent the day with Tatum and only left once I knew she was safe with Monroe. I’d ignored the filthy glare Monroe gave me when she spied the Milo tin in the room. And I made no apologies to her. No fucking way was I not getting Tatum what she wanted. I almost laughed, though, when she placed a Milo tin next to mine. I liked the fact she stood her ground.
I rounded a corner and a few moments later entered Marilyn’s room. She sat in the chair in the corner with her eyes closed, but they fluttered open when she heard me.
She shot out of the chair and came to me, flinging her arms around me. “Oh my God! I thought I’d never see you again!” She sobbed into my chest as I ignored the bolt of pain her hug inspired and wrapped my arms around her.
Smoothing her hair, I waited for her to let me go. I’d hold her for as long as she needed, though.
When she stopped sobbing and moved out of my embrace, she looked up at me with a questioning expression. I knew what she was asking, and I nodded. “He can’t hurt you ever again, Lynny. I made sure of it.”
Her hand flew to her face and she burst into tears again. I pulled her back to me, and we held each other for an eternity. We’d been through so much shit together. We were always there for each other to the best of our abilities and always would be.
With my arms tight around her and my hand cradling her head, I said, “You should have told me what he did to you.”
Stiffening, she tried to pull away.
“No,” I said as I held her tighter. “Don’t do that. You have nothing to be ashamed about or to hide from. He did that shit to you. You did nothing wrong. You don’t hide away. Ever.”
Her hands gripped my shirt and she buried her head in my chest while she cried.
“You hear me, Lynny? This isn’t on you. I’ll do everything in my power to help you believe that.” I took a step back and forced her to look up at me. Her tear-stained face shattered me all over again. “Promise me you’ll let me help.”
She nodded. “I promise.”
I stayed with her for a good couple of hours, watching television together and talking a little about her sessions with her psychologist. It was the first time she’d ever confided any of that type of stuff with me, and I felt like it was a whole new start for us and for our family. If we could find a way to move out of the darkness that had always consumed us, it really would be a new beginning.
* * *
King met me in the corridor outside Tatum’s room when I arrived back there after visiting Marilyn. We hadn’t spoken a great deal since the night before. He’d driven me to the hospital in almost complete silence and dropped me off, telling me he’d be back when he could. I’d gotten the impression he was overwhelmed by the whole situation, which was odd for King.
His eyes held an apology as he looked at me. Stepping closer, he jerked his chin towards Tatum. “She seems to be doing better.”
“Yeah. She told me you’ve been checking in on her. I appreciate that.”
He scrubbed his face. “Fuck, it’s the least I can fucking do, Nitro. This shit is on me. He used our delivery time as his opportunity to kidnap Tatum. She’d be okay if I hadn’t agreed to that deal.”
“No, this shit is on Joseph. It wouldn’t have changed the course of any of this if Storm hadn’t taken that deal. He’s been coming for me for years. I just didn’t realise it.” I recalled Tatum telling me that we can’t hold people responsible for our choices in life. I wouldn’t hold King responsible for Joseph’s actions.
“Thank fuck for Eric Bones. He was the one who helped me find you. Said something about a deal he was supposed to make with Joseph and that he’d changed his mind about getting into bed with him.”
I frowned. “How did Eric know where the warehouse was?”
“Turns out he’s more switched on than we ever gave him credit for. He had some of his guys follow Joseph after he met with him a few days ago. Told me you were leaving Storm and thought it was strange, which was another trigger for him to think twice about the deal. He came to check that with me, thank fuck.”
Monroe stepped out of the room, taking in King before looking at me. “Tatum’s asleep so I’m going to head home. Are you staying?”
“Yeah. I’m not leaving this hospital until she does, except for when you’re here.”
“I’ve decided that even though you pissed me off with the Milo thing, I like you. You’re exactly what Tatum needs in her life.”
King interrupted. “The Milo thing?”
She turned to him. “Oh, you have no idea, dude.” Pointing her thumb at me, she said, “This guy’s trying to go all hero and shit on my girl, which is fine and all, but I draw the line at him taking over my responsibilities. Maybe you could help a girl out and have a quiet word with him. Tell him to back the fuck off with the Milo.”
With that, she slung her handbag over her shoulder, gave me one last pointed look and left us.
King watched her go until he couldn’t see her anymore. “Fuck, she’s enough to get a man’s dick to stand up and beg for more.”
“You got a thing for redheads, brother?”
His eyes lit up. “That, and a mouth that tells it like it is.” He whistled. “And those curves are something fucking else.”
“You got a pierced dick, King? From what I’ve heard, that’s what she’s looking for.”
His mouth stretched across his face in a smile that told me more about King than I ever needed to know. Lifting his chin at me, he said, “You get back to your woman. I’m heading to the clubhouse for a bit. I’ll swing by again in the morning.”
“Where are we at with Gambarro?”
“We’re working with Dragon keeping tabs on what Gambarro’s up to. I’m not sure about shit where Silver Hell’s concerned. We might be working with them, but no way in hell do I trust those motherfuckers. We’ll see what happens, but I’ve told the boys to stay alert and be ready for anything. Who knows when they could turn on us?”
“I agree.”
He was quiet for a moment. “I should have listened to you, Nitro. Should have trusted you when you warned me about Joseph. I won’t make that mistake again,” he said solemnly.
I nodded and watched him leave. Joseph took a lot from me, but we all learned some lessons in the process. I’d always respected King and been loyal to him, but his loyalty to me was more than I’d ever had from anyone outside of my family. And it only strengthened mine in return.
* * *
Tatum eyed my house as I pulled the ute into the driveway. “Does this mean you’re not taking me home?”
I smiled at her while she watched me with eyes that twinkled her happiness. The doctor had allowed her to finally leave the hospital that morning, and I’d told her I would take her home. “You got a problem with staying here, Vegas?”
She shrugged casually. “No problem, except you’ve got no furniture and no room for any of my clothes.”
I leant over and caught her lips in a kiss. Thank fuck I could do that again since her pain wasn’t as bad. I needed those lips like I fucking needed air. “You should get your ass out of this car and see for yourself. I bought some damn furniture.”
Her eyes widened. “You did? When?”
I shook my head at her. “Fuck, always with the twenty questions.”
“You’re lucky you’ve got bruises and shit on you or else I’d smack you right now.
”
“My bruises are nothing, Tatum.”
She cupped my cheek, looking at the marks on my face. “You keep saying that, but I know he would have hurt you worse than me. Why do you keep shutting down on me when I bring it up?”
“Because I won’t give that motherfucker any more opportunities to hurt us. Yeah, he hurt me, but it was nothing compared to the pain of watching him hurt you. I won’t talk about him with you again. That part of our lives together is done.”
“Our lives together… I like the sound of that,” she said softly, almost as if she wasn’t sure what it meant or didn’t fully believe it.
“Make no mistake, I intend to spend the rest of my life with you, Vegas.”
Her hand moved to curl around my neck. “Look at you all bossy and shit. Do I even get a say in that?”
I’d heard of men thinking they owned women and I’d never bought into that bullshit, but sitting there, with my woman in front of me asking if she got a say in me spending my life with her caused some part of my brain to fire weirdly. As far as I was concerned, she was mine. No other man would ever touch her again; I’d make fucking sure of it. Jesus, if I could have laid her out on the back seat and shown her who she belonged to, I fucking would have. Instead, I showed her with my mouth, and when I was finished, I growled, “You always get a say, but if you think I’m ever going to listen to anything but a yes, you’re kidding yourself. I’ll fucking follow you to the ends of the earth if I have to. You were made for me and I was made for you.”
She beamed at me. Fucking beamed. And then she made my whole fucking life when she said, “I was. Now shut up and show me where I can put my clothes. And it better not be just a drawer. I’m gonna be needing a wardrobe for the shit I’m moving in.”
46
Tatum
“Gone, Gone, Gone” by Phillip Phillips
Six weeks later
“Oh God!” Posey exclaimed as she doubled over with laughter. “I can’t believe you said that to him, Monroe.”
Monroe lifted her mimosa to her lips and drank some before saying, “It was true, though. Look, if a guy’s gonna get his wang out after boasting about how big it is, it better be big. His wasn’t. So I told him.”
“I have to agree with Roe,” I said. “Don’t brag about shit you have no right bragging about.”
Posey wiped her tears from her eyes and drank some of her wine. “You know, Friday afternoon drinks is the highlight of my week. Thank you for letting me join in.”
Monroe lifted a brow. “Even if it’s Milo Friday?”
I smacked her arm. “Shut the fuck up. I told you why it had to be Milo Friday this week.”
“I just hope that Nitro doesn’t think it’s gonna be Milo Friday every damn week.”
“This has nothing to do with h—”
“I don’t know anything about Milo Friday,” Nitro said, joining us at his kitchen table. His eyes met mine and although he wasn’t smiling, they held affection.
“Really?” Monroe asked, perking up as if there was some juicy gossip to be had.
I sighed. “Okay so maybe I left some details out,” I admitted, not wanting to be having this conversation in front of Nitro. Damn Monroe and her bullshit detector.
“Spill, sister,” she demanded.
Nitro settled in with his arms folded across his chest. He knew I reserved every Friday night for the girls and had been surprised when I said it wasn’t on this week and that he should keep the night free to hang out with me.
“Can we discuss this later?” I begged, widening my eyes at her so she’d get the idea that I really didn’t want to talk about it.
She ignored me and shook her head. “Nope.”
“Yeah, start talking, Vegas. I’m interested, too.”
I looked at him again. God, I loved it when he called me Vegas. It had irritated the hell out of me when we’d first met, but not anymore. Nitro didn’t do nicknames with anyone and he certainly didn’t do terms of endearment unless you counted kiddo, which he called Renee. I’d come to realise how special Vegas was, and my cold heart treasured it. Not that my heart could be classified as cold anymore. It was warm as fuck these days, thanks to him.
“Okay, but you have to promise me you’ll pretend like you didn’t know,” I said to him.
He frowned. “About what?”
I hopped off my stool and walked to him. Sliding my arms around his waist, I said, “Dustin’s cooking you dinner tonight as a surprise thank you for helping him find his own place and moving him in. He didn’t want you to know about it, so I promised him I would get you there without telling you why. That’s why I couldn’t do drinks tonight. It’s the only night off he has this week.”
His hand landed on my ass. When he spoke, his voice was all gravelly. “You amaze me.”
“Why?”
“The way you love my family. It means a lot to me.”
“Family’s everything,” I said softly.
“Yeah, they are.” He dropped his mouth to mine and kissed me. “I’m gonna make it worth your while later to have missed Friday drinks.”
I loved it when Nitro made me dirty promises like that. He never failed to deliver. “What are you gonna do?”
Monroe cleared her voice behind us. “Okay, you two, round that shit up. No one needs to hear about sex when they aren’t getting any.”
Nitro smacked my ass and grinned. Placing his mouth to my ear, he murmured, “Pussy on my tongue is a good way to start, I think.”
Pushing him away, I said, “Stop teasing me. Go and have a shower and calm yourself down. And get ready to go out.”
He kept grinning as he backed away holding his hands up in defence. “I don’t wanna get started without you.”
Monroe groaned. “Stop talking, Nitro, and keep fucking walking.”
The sound of him laughing as he walked down the hallway filled the house. He’d started doing that a lot more often lately. It had to be one of my favourite sounds ever.
“Posey, you wanna come get a drink with me? I can’t handle Milo Friday any longer,” Monroe said as I turned back to join them. She may have been grumbling, but the smile she gave me was full of love.
I blew her a kiss. “I love you, too, Roe.”
“Yeah, I know, sister. I love you, too. But you need to get your ass in that shower with your man. I’m not the kind of woman to ever get in the way of that.” And by that, I knew she meant so much more than sex. Monroe might have referred almost everything she said back to sex, but she was as deep as they came when it had to do with relationships. She loved love. And she loved me being with Nitro.
I said my goodbyes, walking them out to Monroe’s car and then made my way inside to the bathroom. The shower was already running and steam greeted me when I opened the door. Nitro liked his showers as hot as possible, and I had trouble seeing. But I could hear him.
The sound of him jerking off shot heat straight to my core. When he finally came into view, the first thing I saw was his back muscle flexing. He rested one forearm against the shower wall and his head hung forward while he pumped his cock with his hand.
I stood watching silently, turned-on as hell. My eyes greedily lapped up every inch of his powerful naked body. His tight ass that I loved to grip onto while he fucked me; those muscular arms that I loved around me; his strong legs that often held us up while he slammed into me against the wall. I could watch Nitro getting himself off for hours.
“Vegas…,” he growled. “Get your lips around my dick.”
My clothes were already half off and once I was naked, I stepped into the shower with him. I slid an arm around his waist as I moved to position myself between him and the wall.
His eyes met mine.
His hand continued to work his cock.
My whole body sang with desire.
“Fuck.” He groaned as water streamed over us. “I’ve been thinking about you all fucking day.”
Catching him around the neck, I pulled his face down to mine
so I could kiss him. “Are you close to coming?”
He nodded, and I could tell by the way his body tensed that he was. “Yeah,” he forced out, his breathing ragged.
“Well, champ, I’m not wrapping my lips around you. If your dick’s that hard, I want it inside me.”
Amusement flashed in his eyes and he pressed his mouth to mine again, demanding another kiss. When he was done, he muttered, “Champ….”
I grinned as I looped my arms around his neck. He let his dick go so he could take hold of my ass and lift me. Wrapping my legs around him, I closed my eyes as he thrust inside me. “Fuck,” I cried and held on tight while he gave me what we both craved.
His fury.
And when we were done, he reminded me why I loved him. He pulled out and took hold of my face with both his hands. After he kissed me for a long time, he said, “I love you.”
He gave me his unconditional love.
Loving Nitro was easy because there was nothing required in return. When he loved, he simply loved.
47
Nitro
“I’m In” by Keith Urban
“I got my licence!” Renee squealed as she flashed it at us. Her whole face lit up with happiness, and it hit me fair in the gut. It was about damn time our family had as much happiness as we’d had recently. It’d been almost two months since Joseph’s death and instead of waking each day wondering what bad shit would happen, I woke only thinking of the good in my life.
Tatum grinned from where she sat on the couch next to me. We’d both finished work early and had spent the afternoon in bed and then in front of the television. She’d brought some work home and was finishing it off when Renee came barging through the front door.
“Fantastic!” Tatum said. “First go, too. Must be all those hours you did with me that helped you.”