EDWIN: You know what—
(PINKY enters.)
PINKY: Hi, Edwin!
EDWIN: Pinky! Jesus Christ, where in the hell you been at, Pinky?! Huh?! … No! No, do not come closer! Do not come closer, Pinky, ’cuz I’m liable to take off my belt right here in this bar!
PINKY: Why?
EDWIN: Where the fuck you been?!
PINKY: Out?
EDWIN: What time I sent you out for Yodels, Pinky?
PINKY: Um … before noon?
EDWIN: Goddamn right it was before noon! Ten-thirty in the morning! Ten-thirty in the morning I sent you out for Yodels and milk. What time is it now?
PINKY: Late?
EDWIN: Pinky!
PINKY: Very late?
EDWIN: Two in the morning, Pinky! It’s two in the fuckin’ morning!
PINKY: I’m sorry—
EDWIN: Fuck you “I’m sorry”—where’s the bodega from here?
PINKY: Up the block.
EDWIN: So then how in the fuck did it take you almost sixteen hours to walk up the fuckin’ block?! Answer me!
PINKY: I’m sorry.
EDWIN: I called the police! The fire department! The fuckin’ neighbors!
(PINKY tries to hand EDWIN a smushed Yodel.)
PINKY: I … I saved you a Yodel!
(EDWIN slaps it out of his hand violently.)
EDWIN: Where you been at? Answer me!
PINKY: That hurt, Edwin.
EDWIN: I’m gonna call up Social Services, Pinky!
PINKY: No!
EDWIN: Yes I am!
PINKY: I was with Norca, okay?!
EDWIN: Stop lying!
PINKY: I’m not lying, I was with Norca!
(EDWIN takes out his cell phone.)
EDWIN: I’m dialing the number, Pinky!
PINKY: I was with Norca, I swear! I saw her by the corner and I said, “Hi Norca,” and she said, “Fuck off, Retardo” (like how she calls me), but then I gave her some Yodels, and the milk, and the change, and I told her about my disability check, and we cashed it at the pharmacy, and we went to her friend to buy marijuana, and we went to a bar, and she smoked marijuana and drank margaritas, and I smoked three cigarettes and ate a cheeseburger and drank a lot of Sprite, and nobody looked at me funny, and we talked, and that’s truth, Edwin, I swear!!
EDWIN: That fucking bitch!
PINKY: You’re not gonna call Social Services, are you?
EDWIN: Pinky, this story? It’s a true one?
PINKY: It’s true, Edwin. It’s the best time I ever had in my life!
EDWIN: Best time you ever had?! That miserable bitch! Let Norca take care of your ass 24-7-365, see how many best times you have then!
PINKY: I know.
EDWIN: No, you don’t know—you don’t know shit.
PINKY: We talked so much, Edwin. You wouldn’t believe what we talked about. She said I was her best friend! She said I was the smartest person she ever met!
EDWIN: Yeah—you so smart you let that fuckin’ bitch call you a retard, steal your money, and cash your fuckin’ check. Real smart, Pinky.
PINKY: Can I have a hug, Edwin?
EDWIN: Did I tell you stay away from Norca?
PINKY: You toal me Norca didn’t like me, but you were wrong.
EDWIN: I was wrong?!
PINKY: I’m sorry—
EDWIN: No, Pinky, you said it, live with it.
PINKY: I didn’t mean it.
EDWIN: Go home, Pinky!
PINKY: But I wanna stay with you!
EDWIN: Well, I don’t wanna stay with you! How’s that? How’s that, Pinky?! Don’t you understand that I have to know where you are? That every minute of every day I have to be able to know that you’re not dead somewhere?! But I guess I’m “wrong” about that too! “Wrong” about a lot of things!
PINKY: No.
EDWIN: Guess I was wrong going to court to keep you after Mom died, wrong to stay in this neighborhood where you feel familiar, wrong to tell Social Services to go fuck themselves, guess I was wrong every toy, every game, every movie, every dinner, every weekend, every night a my whole fuckin’ life!
PINKY: No.
EDWIN: And that today, Pinky, out of all the fuckin’ days in the year—with everything going on here—that you got to pick today to spazz out and terrify me and let me down when I needed you—for once—to be a little less a retard and a little more a fuckin’ man—I will never forgive you for that … Never … Yeah, dass right, cry! You gave me six heart attacks today—you should cry! Now go the fuck home, you little fuckin’ baby—and pack your fuckin’ bags! Go!
(PINKY exits. Beat. EDWIN takes out his cell.)
EDWIN: Mrs. McNulty? Mrs. McNulty, this is Edwin the Super, sorry to call so late … No, I’m fine. Pinky, he’s comin’ up the block now, could you wait for him by the lamp post? Yeah. Yeah, thanks. Nah, let him watch TV, whatever he wants. Thanks. You too, dear.
(EDWIN hangs up, finds a seat, his head collapsing into his arms. He heaves. Silence.)
(MARCIA looks at EDWIN. Silence.)
(MARCIA finds tissues in her purse, crosses to EDWIN, leaves tissues on table, goes back to her seat. Silence.)
(MARCIA considers, then picks up her food, drink, silverware, napkin, and purse, crosses to EDWIN’s table. Sits. Silence.)
MARCIA: My grandfather was an alcoholic … He used to beat up my grandmother, and my mom, and Sister Rose … When Sister Rose was eleven, she stood up to my grandfather, and after that, he would only beat her. The result of this is that my mom and Sister Rose both grew up to become different kinds of maniacs. They were both alcoholics … They’re both dead … And I’m just like both of them … And I think maybe you are too.
EDWIN: I, uh … You gonna eat that?
MARCIA: Uh, no.
EDWIN: Mind if I do?
MARCIA: Please.
EDWIN: I always get hungry … when I have a lot of feelings.
MARCIA: I understand.
EDWIN: I personally don’t think I’m a maniac, and—lemme finish—I think that although you’re a little … unique … I don’t think you’re that either.
MARCIA: Not yet, but maybe soon.
EDWIN: And I don’t think Sister Rose was a maniac neither.
MARCIA: Well, that’s where you’re wrong.
EDWIN: Lemme tell you something: You know who taught me how ta ride a bike? Sister Rose. You know who told me I was handsome all the time till I started believin’ it? Sister Rose. Who helped my brother Pinky learn stuff every day after school so he wouldn’t get sent to a special school someplace else? Sister Rose.
MARCIA: But that’s—
EDWIN: Hold up. Yes, she could be wild, mean sometimes, she had a big stick and she knew howta use it, believe me, but ask any kid who grew up ’round a hundred twenty-first, and if they’re being honest? They’ll tell ya something special she done for them … ‘cuz thass who she was … and thass why so many people are turnin’ up outta the woodwork, ’cuz in their heart?—they know … They know she was … that she was … Our Lady, ya know?
MARCIA: I wish my mom could hear you talking about her sister like that.
EDWIN: Yeah, well, I wish a lot a things too.
MARCIA: Like what?
EDWIN: I dunno.
MARCIA: What?
EDWIN: Nothing. Just …
MARCIA: What?
EDWIN: You’re very pretty, Marcia. I just think you’re so … pretty …
MARCIA: …
GAIL: Sorry to bother you, but … Question: Do I seem gay to you?
MARCIA: “Seem”?
GAIL: Okay … Do I seem very gay?
EDWIN: No, I wouldn’t say that you seemed “very” gay.
MARCIA: Edwin, be honest.
EDWIN: You seem “quite” gay.
MARCIA: Just “quite”?
GAIL: (To MARCIA) So, you’re saying what? I seem “very quite” gay?
MARCIA: Well, I would have to say, I mean, if you really wanna know,
that you appear to be exceedingly gay.
EDWIN: No, I disagree.
MARCIA: Edwin, the man is gay!
GAIL: But if I was dressed differently—
MARCIA: Still gay.
GAIL: If I had a complete makeover—
MARCIA: Completely made-over gay.
GAIL: So you’re saying, even if I change everything about me, and I mean everything—
MARCIA: Well, I’d have to see it first, but …
GAIL: Thank you for your honesty.
(GAIL goes back to his drink.)
MARCIA: Would you ever consider shaving your moustache?
EDWIN: My moustache? I don’t think so.
MARCIA: That’s okay. Would you like to have dinner with me tomorrow … or breakfast?
EDWIN: I can’t.
MARCIA: Why not?
EDWIN: Funeral.
MARCIA: I mean after the funeral.
EDWIN: I got stuff
MARCIA: Well, how ’bout the next day?
EDWIN: Workin’.
MARCIA: Call in sick.
EDWIN: Don’t you take no for an answer?
MARCIA: Why should I?
EDWIN: C’mon. You saw.
MARCIA: Saw what?
EDWIN: My brother.
MARCIA: So?!
EDWIN: So, you wanna love me? Decide to love me right now? Marry me tomorrow? Move in with me and my brother? Love him too? Stay here in this neighborhood for as long as it takes? You wanna do that, I’ll give it a shot.
MARCIA: That is so unfair.
EDWIN: Welcome to my life that ain’t gonna change.
(EDWIN goes to exit.)
MARCIA: Martyr!
EDWIN: My brother needs me!
MARCIA: You need your brother! God, haven’t you ever heard of therapy?!
EDWIN: I choose loyalty!
MARCIA: Yeah, well what good does that do me?!
(Beat)
EDWIN: Look, Marcia, it’s just better this way.
(EDWIN exits. Silence.)
GAIL: “When I became a man, I put away childish things.”
MARCIA: What?
GAIL: He should read Corinthians.
MARCIA: What?
GAIL: “When I became a man, I put away childish things”—Saint Paul.
MARCIA: Fuck off!
(A long beat. FLIP enters, drunk, but steady, approaches GAIL, face-to-face .)
(Beat)
GAIL: What?
(FLIP kisses GAIL.)
GAIL: You kissed me.
(FLIP kisses GAIL again.)
GAIL: That’s twice. You kissed me twice. In relative public, Robert.
FLIP: Damn straight.
GAIL: (Re: MARCIA) Right in front of that woman.
FLIP: Dass right. Can we go back to the hotel now?
(Beat)
GAIL: Do you know her?
FLIP: Who?
GAIL: That woman over there. Do you know her?
FLIP: Do I know her? Yeah. Yeah, I know her. Her name’s Katie.
GAIL: Katie?
FLIP: Yeah. Katie Ryan. We were in the fifth grade together. Let’s go.
GAIL: Katie Ryan?
FLIP: What?
GAIL: “Katie Ryan,” Robert?!
(Beat)
FLIP: Don’t ruin it, Gail.
GAIL: You don’t really think I’m a bad actor, do you, Robert?
FLIP: You’re … my star.
GAIL: I’ll send for my things.
(GAIL goes to exit.)
FLIP: “Send for your things”?—
GAIL: I’m thirty-seven years old, Robert … Thirty-seven. And so are you.
FLIP: Gail?
GAIL: Thirty-seven.
(GAIL exits.)
Scene 3: Main viewing room, 5 a.m.
(VIC is asleep. EDWIN is asleep. ROOFTOP sits between them. SONIA sits alone. INEZ reads her Bible.)
ROOFTOP: Nezzie?
INEZ: Hello, Walter.
ROOFTOP: Didn’t see you come in.
INEZ: You was sleepin’.
ROOFTOP: What time is it, Nezzie?
INEZ: Dass not a watch on your wrist?
ROOFTOP: Right. Yeah … Damn, five a.m. I gotta make a call. Gotta call in sick on my show this morning. You ever heard my show?
INEZ: Pay phone’s just around the corner.
ROOFTOP: Anything happen while—
INEZ: No.
ROOFTOP: Well, “no news is good news,” right?
INEZ: What?
ROOFTOP: Well, I guess not in this case, huh? Reading your Bible, I see.
INEZ: Trying to.
ROOFTOP: “Into the valley of the dead rode the six hundred”!
INEZ: Thass not the Bible, Walter.
ROOFTOP: Oh … Say, I been to the church today.
INEZ: Yeah?
ROOFTOP: Went to confession.
INEZ: That musta took a while.
Our Lady of 121st Street Page 7