He tilts his head slightly to the side. "Meh. I thought about it, but I decided to come here instead."
"Are you sure? Dolce doesn't have victory shots."
He laughs softly before his expression turns serious. "Trust me, Kay. I'm exactly where I want to be."
Holden and I spend the next half hour talking as he follows me around the coffee shop. At one point, he even helps me wipe down tables. It feels like old times, when he would wait for me to get off work so he could drive me back to his place.
A few minutes after we finish up, the door opens and Bree walks in with Skylar.
"Oh, hey Holden." She sounds off, and they share a look I haven't seen in a year.
He clears his throat. "H-hey Bree. How've you been?"
"Good."
Dawson and Skylar look between the three of us as I try to figure out what's going on. Thankfully, Skylar voices the question all three of us are thinking.
"Did you two bang or something? Cause you're acting like you banged."
Bree's eyes widen as Holden laughs. "God, no." She says, slightly disgusted.
Holden looks at Dawson. "She is the female equivalent of you. Lack of a filter and all."
"I know." He answers dreamily.
Despite Bree's answer, I can't help but wonder if there is some truth behind Skylar's assumption. The last time I've seen them look at each other like there was some big secret, was when they were together. What if they did hook up again? It's not like I could be mad about girl code. Hell, Holden cheated on her with me. What makes me think he wouldn't do the same to me? The thought is nauseating and eats me alive.
TWO DAYS PASS AND I still can't get the idea of Holden and Bree out of my head. Dawson, being the intuitive and nosy person he is, takes notice and asks me about it while we close on Friday night.
"Are you alright? You've seemed off lately."
I shrug, knowing he'd be able to see right through a lie. "I guess. I don't know."
He dips his head down to make me look at him. "Is this about Bree and Holden?" I nod. "Do you really think they did something? I mean Holden seems crazy about you, and Bree is one of your best friends."
Picking up a mug and drying it to busy myself, I avoid eye contact with him. "You didn't know her when she was with him. He was her entire world. And if Holden is so crazy about me, why is he yet to bring up what's going on with us?"
Dawson sighs and opens his arms to give me a hug. I go willingly, swallowing down the lump in my throat and trying not to cry. He rubs my back as I rest my head on his shoulder. I didn't know how bad I needed this. For a moment, I get lost in the comfort.
He moves his hand to my head and starts caressing it lightly. I sniffle as a few tears stream down my face and hit his shirt.
"Crap. Sorry." I murmur, pulling my head away.
He frowns just slightly, putting his hands on my face and using his thumbs to wipe away my tears. I let out a small breath as we stand there, just staring at each other. His eyes glance down at my lips and then back up, and I can't help but do the same.
Just as I think he's about to move in, the two of us break out into hysterical laughter. Dawson ends up on the floor, rolling around and holding his stomach, as I hold onto the end of the counter. The more I think about it, the more I laugh. Thank God that didn't happen. Kissing Dawson would be like kissing my cousin – awkward and wrong.
The two of us change out of our uniforms and into clothes more suited for a party. We lock the doors to Dolce before climbing into his car. As I check my hair in the mirror, Dawson puts the car in drive and pulls out onto the road.
"Are Sky and Bree there already?"
He nods. "Yeah. Sky said they got there about 20 minutes ago." When I don't respond, he glances at me to make sure I'm alright. "Hey, I'm sure it's nothing to worry about. Don't overthink it."
I snort. "Have you met me? Overthinking part of my daily routine."
"Good point. But really, let's not jump to any conclusions. Okay?"
"Okay."
My answer is forced, and I think he knows that. Thankfully, he doesn't mention it. If I'm being honest, the thought of Holden and Bree rekindling last year's romance makes me feel like my world is collapsing. I know that I all but stole him from her, but her and I weren't nearly as close then as we are now. I don't know if I would be able to stay here if that happens.
We pull up to the party, needing to park a little down the street due to all the cars. How they don't get the cops called on them constantly is a question I ask myself every weekend. They're the best parties on campus, and everyone knows it.
Dawson and I get out of the car and walk down the sidewalk, towards the party. Knowing I'm about to see Holden again, my heart starts to race and my palms become sweaty. It's crazy that he can still have this effect on me, even with everything we've been through. I don't understand how this is the same guy I used to despise with every fiber of my being.
"Go find Bree and Skylar. I'm just going to put my purse in Holden's room." I say as soon as we get inside.
He nods, and the two of us split up – him going into the kitchen as I go upstairs. I walk down the long hallway to my ex's room. I move the vase on the table to retrieve the key, but when I'm about to put it in the lock, the door opens.
"Oh, hey. You scared me." Bree says, her breathing unsteady.
My eyebrows furrow as I wonder what she was doing. "Where's Skylar?"
She runs her fingers through her hair nervously. "Downstairs, I think. You haven't seen her?"
"No." I reply hesitantly. "I just got here."
"Oh, that makes sense." I ignore her, and walk into Holden's room. She senses the awkwardness, and in typical Bree manner, she looks around nervously. "I'll, uh, meet you downstairs. Okay?"
I nod, not making eye contact with her as I put my purse down. I sit on the bed and take a deep breath.
"At least she was in here alone." I whisper to myself, but I speak too soon.
The sound of the toilet flushing pulls my attention to the bathroom door, just in time to see it open and Holden step out. He's looking down at his phone and smiling as he walks into the room. When he sees me, he grin widens.
"Hey, you're finally here." He greets me.
I bite my lip, trying to hold in the tears as my mind imagines the worst. For the first time in a while, I feel like I'm going to have an anxiety attack. A part of me wants to leave, but that wouldn't solve anything. I need to know once and for all what he wants, and if he won't bring it up, then I will.
"Are you and Bree getting back together?" I blurt.
He's caught off guard, but his eyes only soften. "Of course not."
"Why not?"
He comes over to sit next to me, but I stand and take one step away from him. "What do you mean why not? Because I'm not interested in her."
I cross my arms. "You were into her last year when you dated her. It's not crazy to think you could be again."
"Come on, Kayleigh. You know me."
"Do I?!"
"Yes. You know me better than anyone here."
I sigh, feeling completely overwhelmed by everything. "Then why was she in here with you? And why do you two keep looking at each other like there's a big secret?"
He stands and takes a step toward me. "We were just talking. Don't you trust me?"
"I do." I respond honestly. "I just don't know what's going on with us, and it's starting to drive me crazy."
He steps closer and pulls me into a hug. I wrap my arms around his waist and breathe him in. It's amazing how his touch can both excite me and calm me down all at once.
"We’ll talk soon. For now, just believe me. You have nothing to worry about." He murmurs into my hair as he kisses my head.
"Promise?"
"I promise."
The two of us go down to the party and spend the night closer than we have been in months. There isn't much PDA, but we naturally gravitate toward each other. If we’re not next to each other, we’re looking around
to see where the other is and smiling from across the crowded room.
I allow myself to have a few beers, but make sure not to get too carried away. Yet, due to not drinking in months, the smallest amount of alcohol causes me to feel a bit tipsy. Dawson, Holden, and Skylar all watch me carefully, making sure I stop drinking at the first sign of intoxication.
By the time the bonfire is lit, there aren't many people here. Half of the guys have gone to bed, and most of the guests have gone back to their dorms. I come outside from getting a bottle of water to see a few empty chairs left around the fire, smiling when I spot one next to Holden.
I walk down the stairs and make my way over there. Caleb and Jason are telling everyone about the prank they played on a few of the new guys. Dawson, Skylar, Bree, and Carson, as well as a few other people, all listen intently.
I carefully slip by my friends, trying to get to the empty chair beside Holden – however, he has other plans. Just when I'm about to pass him, he wraps his arms around my hips and pulls me down onto his lap. I giggle softly, glancing over my shoulder to see him placing a soft kiss on my skin. It doesn't seem like he's going to let me sit anywhere else, but I don't mind at all.
Adjusting myself slightly to get comfortable, I settle back against him. His arms stay wrapped around my waist and I place my hand on top of them – holding my water in the other. He carries on as if nothing is different, but I don't miss the way everyone sneaks glances at what's going on.
"Wait, are you two back together?" Caleb asks excitedly, causing everyone to go silent and wait for the answer.
Holden slips his thumb under my shirt and rubs circles on my skin – just enough contact to assure me. "Mind your business, Sutter."
I can't help but feel a little disappointed at his answer, but our earlier conversation replays in my head. 'For now, just believe me. You have nothing to worry about.' Letting out a sigh of relief, all my fear dissipates. He promised, and I trust him.
Chapter 12
"You know, this started out as a job to keep you company, but now that Skylar's here, can't I just quit?"
Dawson laughs while Skylar's eyebrows furrow. "What are you doing?! Don't give him any ideas! I have to live with him. Don't make me work with him, too!"
Bree and I chuckle as Dawson's smile turns to a pout. Sky mocks his expression before kissing him on the nose. It's simple, but satisfies his needs.
"We're only kidding. I would never quit." I remark.
Dawson eyes me suspiciously. "Because of the free coffee?"
"Well now that you mention it..."
He picks up a muffin and throws it at me, causing me to squeal and shield myself. The ding sounds as the door opens, and Bree taps on my arm incessantly.
"What?" I ask, still looking down and brushing crumbs off me.
"Who ordered a tree?"
"Huh?" Looking towards the door, I see the largest bouquet of long stem red roses I've ever seen in my life. You can barely even see the person holding them. "Uh, excuse me? I think you have the wrong place."
A guy places the arrangement on the counter and steps to the side. "Is this Dolce?" He questions, searching for a sign.
"Yes."
"Then I'm in the right place. I'm looking for a..." He pulls out a piece of paper from his pocket and unfolds it. "Kayleigh Jacobs."
Sky's jaw drops as everything starts to make sense to me. "I'm Kayleigh."
He smiles, handing me a pen and the piece of paper. "Great. Can you just sign here?"
I take the pen from him and quickly sign my name. When I'm done, the man thanks me and leaves the coffee house. I need to stand on my tippy toes in order to see the top of the bouquet. I finally spot the card and pull it from the holder.
There is nothing more beautiful than you,
but these were the closest I could find.
Have dinner with me tonight?
- Holden
"Who are they from?!" Dawson questions, causing Bree and Skylar to face-palm.
"Do you even need to ask?" Bree chuckles before turning to me. "Are you going to go?"
I sigh and shake my head. "I have to close."
"No, no, no. I can handle closing." Dawson contests.
"You can't. We have to do inventory. It'll take you all night."
He groans audibly, seeming more annoyed than I am by the situation. I excuse myself to the back room and take out my phone, dialing Holden's number and waiting for it to ring.
"Hello?" He answers.
"Hey." I reply, instantly feeling the butterflies at the sound of his voice. "I got your flowers. They're beautiful. Thank you."
"You're welcome. Did you read the card?"
"I did."
"And?" The shakiness of his voice tells me he's nervous.
"I wish I could, but I have to help Dawson close tonight."
"Oh."
"That's not me making an excuse. I really want to go. It's just, there’s a lot to do here and it's too much for him to do on his own. Can we go tomorrow night?"
"I'd rather go tonight."
"Me too." I reply sadly.
Holden's breath hitches and I can hear him jump up. "We're going tonight. I'll be there to pick you up at seven."
"What? No, Holden, my job. I can't ditch."
"Just leave that to me. I've got to go, but I'll see you later. Okay?" His tone tells me it's not up for debate.
"Okay."
We hang up the phone and I lean against the wall for a moment, letting it sink in that I'm going on a date with Holden tonight. What's going to happen? Are we going to finally have that constantly impending talk? Are we going to get back together? God, I hope so.
I compose myself and slip my phone into my pocket before walking back out to the front. Ignoring the impatient stares of my friends, I take the waiting customers order and write it on the cup. Once I pass it to Dawson, he rolls his eyes and starts making the drink.
Skylar and Bree continuously watch me, waiting for me to tell them what's going on. I, however, decide to wait until the order is made. The last thing I want is for someone to be listening in on our conversation. Besides, I'd rather bask in this feeling for just a little longer.
A couple minutes later, Dawson passes me the finished drink and I slide it across the counter to the girl. She thanks me before taking the cup and walking out the door. It hasn't even closed again before Bree speaks.
"Okay, spill. The anticipation is killing me!"
I chuckle, pulling myself up to sit on the counter. "We're going out tonight."
"Really?!" They all yell excitedly, and I nod.
"Wait." Sky remarks. "What about Dawson and work?
I shrug. "He said he's going to take care of it and to leave it to him."
"Aww." Bree coos. "It's so cute how he's willing to do anything for you."
"It is." I giggle.
"And he sends you ridiculously large flower arrangements." Skylar mentions as she still checks out its large size.
Bree and I laugh. "It's a tree."
THE HOURS UNTIL SEVEN o'clock crawl by impossibly slow. Every few minutes I either check the clock or my phone. Holden hasn't said anything since I called him. It's unusual, but I don't think too much of it.
Right on time, the door opens and Holden walks in. He's dressed in a suit and I need to remind myself to breathe. Fuck, he's flawless. It takes me a moment to realize he's with six other guys, two of them being Caleb and Jason.
"Did he mention it being a group thing?" Dawson says lowly into my ear. I shake my head.
Holden approaches the counter. "Hey you."
"Hi."
The two of us stand there, just smiling at each other. With every second that passes, I can feel myself falling back into everything Holden. The way he smiles, the sparkle in those emerald green eyes, the way he smells – it's all pulling me under and I'm completely defenseless.
"Ahem." Jason clears his throat. "Don't you have somewhere to be?"
Holden snaps out of it and nods. "
We do." He turns around to address four of the guys. "This is Dawson. Consider him your boss for the next few hours. You are not to leave until he says you can. Understood?"
They all nod in unison. Caleb and Jason walk around to our side of the counter. Jason hops up to sit on it, while Caleb leans against it on the other side of Dawson.
"We brought you slaves." Jason remarks.
Caleb barks out a laugh. "They're not slaves. They're rushes. Still though, we brought you help."
"I see that." Dawson replies. "Thanks guys."
Holden smiles and then focuses his attention on me. "Are you ready to go?"
I raise my eyebrows. "Judging by what you're wearing, no. I'm not ready at all." He bites his lip in an effort to contain his smile.
"We were thinking you'd say that." Bree and Sky remark from behind him.
My jaw drops when I see two of my best friends. Bree's holding a dress and shoes, while Sky has a big bag filled of makeup and hair supplies. They walk over and grab me by my arm, pulling me into the back room.
"What the hell are you guys doing here?" I question.
Bree looks at me knowingly. "Would you rather go to dinner in your uniform?"
"Nope." I reply without hesitation. "Carry on."
They have me change my clothes first. Once I'm done, Sky curls my hair while Bree does my makeup. Between the two of them, I'm finished in a record breaking 15 minutes. They check me over once before sending me on my way. I end up stumbling out the door; the result of them rushing me. Thankfully, I catch myself.
"Wow. You look amazing." Holden compliments.
I try to breath. "Thanks. You ready?"
He nods and gives the rushes one more serious look as he leads me to the door. Just as we're walking out, Jason yells from where he sits.
"Have fun, lovebirds!"
Everyone snickers as the door swings closed behind us. Holden places his hand on my lower back, walking me to his car.
"Sometimes I wonder why I'm friends with them." He quips, opening the passenger door for me.
I smile sweetly. "Because they love you."
He chuckles as he shuts the door and walks around to the driver's side. Once he's buckled, he starts the car and pulls out onto the road. We spend the drive talking about his upcoming game on Tuesday and Caleb's new girlfriend. Apparently, he started dating a girl named Jacki. I'm happy for him. I just hope she's better than Taylor.
Endless December (Sleepless November Saga Book 2) Page 7