Caleb and Jason watch as I stand up, give Holden a quick kiss, and leave the house. I tuck my hands into my sweatshirt to shield myself from the cold as I head toward the dorms. If I remember correctly, Jade’s in the building across from mine.
The walk there goes by faster than I originally thought it would. Though, when I'm frustrated, my pace tends to be quicker than usual. When I get to her door, I knock before giving myself a chance to talk myself out of it.
"Hey." Jade greets me. "What are you doing here? Is everything alright?"
"Yeah, yeah. Everything's fine." I reply as I shut the door behind me. "Um, can I use your phone? Mine died and I need to text Dawson and let him know I'm going to be late for work."
She pulls her phone out of her back pocket and hands it to me. "Sure."
I take the phone from her and she returns to her bed and continues what she was doing on her computer. Leaning against the door, I open her text messages and instantly find the one labeled 'Jordan'. Sure enough, she was texting him all yesterday and today about picking up an eight ball of coke. I was so stupid to believe her.
"I thought you said you were clean." I whisper brokenly.
She looks up at me and squints. "I-I am." She stands and takes a step toward me.
"Don't lie to me."
She reaches forward to grab her phone from my hands. As soon as she sees what text I was looking at, her eyes widen. "Kay, I can explain."
I shake my head. "No. I don't want to hear it. Take your lies and your cocaine addiction, and stay away from me."
As I go to walk out the door, she grabs my hand. "Please, don't leave."
"No! I'm serious. Stay the fuck away from me."
I rip myself from her grip and storm out of the room. I can't believe I let myself believe her. Why wouldn't she lie to me? All she ever did was get me to be like her. She's a black hole, and she pulls everyone down with her. Now I get to tell Holden that, once again, he was right.
THE NEXT DAY, I'M in the middle of making a customer's order when every phone in Dolce goes off at the same time. Everyone looks around suspiciously, including Dawson, as they pull their phones out. A familiar voice come through the speakers in stereo mode and I narrow my eyes as I wonder what’s going on. When I hand the finished coffee to the customer, he looks me up and down.
"Is this you?" He questions, clearly judging me.
He turns his phone around and on the screen, is a video of me from last year. I'm sitting in Jade's dorm room, smiling and laughing just before I snort a line of coke off the desk. Suddenly, every person in the room is looking at me and whispering to each other. The room starts to spin, and Dawson's concerned voice, along with everything else, fades into the darkness.
Chapter 21
Iwake up in Holden's bed with a pounding headache. Thoughts of earlier flood my mind, making me wish the mattress would just swallow me whole. From the panic attack I had at Dolce, to when Holden picked me up and brought me back here – feeding me my anxiety medication like a lifeline. It's like I woke up from a nightmare, but the nightmare is very real.
I wrap the blanket around myself and leave the room in hopes of finding my boyfriend. When I reach the staircase, I can hear him yelling from below.
"I don't care what you have to do. I want that video gone!" He shouts at some poor kid sitting behind a computer.
I step down the stairs quietly. "What's the point?" I ask groggily, causing everyone's heads to turn toward me. "Everybody has already seen it. Erasing it now won't do anything."
"Hey." Holden murmurs, coming over and picking me up to carry me to the couch. "How are you feeling?"
"Like I was hit by a truck." Rubbing my head, I glance at Caleb and Jason. "I'm sorry I lied to you guys."
They both wave me off dismissively, but Caleb is the one to speak. "You don't owe us anything. Everyone is entitled to their secrets."
I smile gratefully and Holden gets my attention. "We've tracked the video to Jade's phone. Apparently, she got ahold of the student directory and sent it to everyone on it."
"Of course, she did." I groan. "I knew she was a bitch, but I never expected her to do something this low."
"If she wasn't a girl, I'd kick her ass." Jason remarks.
"No." Bree's voice from the door catches us all off guard. "That slut is mine."
The sight of one of my best friends instantly has me on high alert. She's one of the few people close to me who didn't already know about my addiction. Judging by the way she's looking at me, I wish I could rewind time now more than ever.
"Bree." I gasp as I stand. "I can explain."
"Explain?!" She scoffs. "Explain what, Kayleigh? That you had this whole alternate life I knew nothing about? Or that you're supposed to be my best friend and I seem to be the only person who didn't know about this?"
Tears well up in my eyes as I try to find the right words. "That's not true. I wanted to tell you, I was just so ashamed. I didn't want you to think differently of me."
She drops her purse and walks straight into me, wrapping me in her arms as I sob on her shoulder. "Kay, I could never. People make mistakes. I just wish you had told me." She rubs her hand up and down my back. "Does this have something to do with you disappearing all summer?"
I nod as I pull my head away from her tear soaked shoulder. "Holden dropped me off at a rehab in May. I didn't get out until July."
"You're a really good boyfriend." She tells him, but then stops. "Wait, is that why you two broke up over the summer?"
As I bite my lip, my boyfriend walks over and wraps his arms around me. "We don't like to talk about that. She came back to me, and that's all that matters."
"Who are you and what have you done with Holden Rivers?" She asks, looking at him as if he's grown a second head.
THE NEXT WEEK CRAWLS by slowly. The days turn into nights as I spend every second holed up in the Kappa house. Refusing to go to any of my classes and calling out of work are the best ways I know to avoid dealing with the backlash of everyone knowing about my previous recreational activities.
"Babe, you're going to have to leave the house eventually." Holden tells me as he turns on the shower.
"Eventually." I shout back. "As in like a year from now when everyone has forgotten my existence."
For the last few days, he's been acting strangely. I don't know if he's fed up with me not wanting to get out of bed, or if something else has been on his mind – but he keeps trying to get me to leave. However, the only time I did, I attempted to go back to my dorm and couldn't handle all the stares and whispers. It ended with me having yet another anxiety attack, and Holden needing to pick me up.
He's in the middle of taking a shower when his phone vibrates. Reaching over, I glance at it and see something that stops my breathing.
Coach: Your drug test came back clean.
Though I expected nothing less.
My heart starts to pound within my chest, making me feel like I'm going to be sick. No wonder why he's been acting weird. Not only has this train wreck had an impact on my life, but it's messed with Holden's too. He doesn't deserve to have to deal with this.
By the time that Holden gets out of his shower and comes back into the bedroom, I'm already up, dressed, and brushing my hair. He eyes me curiously as I do my best to make myself look presentable.
"Going somewhere?" He questions.
I nod. "Yeah. I was going to go over to Skylar's and help her with some wedding planning."
He looks as if he wants to question it, but ultimately decides not to. "Okay, babe. Well, have fun. I love you."
"I love you, too." I reply, kissing him once and leaving the room - just before I begin to cry.
SKYLAR PLAYS WITH THE different color swatches as I vent about all the things going on in my life. When she heard out about Jade's video, Dawson had to keep her from scouring the dorms until she found the right one. Between her, Bree, Dawson, and Holden – they've been the ones to get me through this. I honestly don't know where I'
d be without them.
"He had to take a drug test, Sky. A drug test." I whine.
"Yeah, but he doesn't do any drugs. No harm, no foul."
I toss myself backwards on to her bed. "That's not the point! My bad decisions are affecting his life. That's not fair to him. It's no surprise he's been acting differently. He doesn't deserve this."
She drops what's in her hands and focuses her full attention on me. "I think you may be reading a little too far into it, hun. He loves you."
"He loves sober me. His feelings for known past drug addict Kayleigh, may be a bit different."
"Hardly. Are you forgetting who brought you to the rehab in the first place?"
"Yeah, yeah. Doesn't mean his feelings didn't change when the entire school found out he's dating a coke-head."
"Former coke-head. And okay, so let's play your game. He completely regrets getting back with you because your ex-friend is a see-you-next-Tuesday. Now what?"
I whine, pulling on my hair before rolling onto my side. "I don't know, but can I sleep here tonight?"
She smiles sadly and kisses her finger before pressing it to the tip of my nose. "Of course."
THE FOLLOWING NIGHT, I'M sitting at Skylar's alone, scrolling through TV channels on the guide. Her and Dawson went out to dinner a half an hour ago. It isn't until Holden texts me that he wants to take me out, that I finally get off the couch. Despite the dreading feeling that he's going to break up with me, I search through Sky's closet for something to wear.
I settle on a pale pink dress that accents my natural curves. I figure, if I'm wearing something that makes me look good, he might second guess his decision. Not that I would blame him if he does end things– he deserves someone so much better.
Just as I'm finishing curling my hair, Holden calls to let me know he's outside. I take a deep breath to compose myself before walking out the door and down the stairs. Climbing into the car, I buckle my seatbelt and turn to my boyfriend nervously.
"Wow. You look gorgeous."
A smile tugs at my lips as he leans over and kisses me. "Thank you." I answer. "So, where are we going? Somewhere far, I hope?"
"Well, first we have to stop back at my place. I forgot something there."
Great. It's probably my things. He wants to make sure he can give them to me so he never has to see me again. A part of me wants to say something – tell him to do it here and now so we can avoid the awkward drive home. Yet at the same time, all I want to do is spend as much time with him as I can.
We pull up to the dark house, which is strange for a Saturday night. I half expected to need to hide in the car, not wanting to be subjected to the raging party they throw on the weekends.
"Where is everyone?"
Holden looks around, confused. "I guess they all decided to go out. Come in with me?"
Shit. Maybe he is going to do it here. We'd be all alone. No one to see me get upset or make a scene; or perhaps he just wants to have sex one last time. Reluctantly, I climb out of the car and walk over to where Holden waits with his hand extended toward me.
"I don't think I've ever seen this place so... quiet." I remark as Holden opens the front door.
We step inside and he turns on the lights. People are standing everywhere and all at once shout "SURPRISE!" I jump, completely startled, and turn to see my boyfriend with a wide smile on his face.
"You did this?!" I ask, smacking him lightly in the stomach.
He smiles shyly and shrugs. "You needed to see that the people who matter don't think anything less of you, and since I didn't get to celebrate your birthday last year..."
Suddenly, two hands cover my eyes and a voice I've known for years speaks into my ear.
"Guess who."
My jaw drops as I grab her wrists and spin around. "Emily?! Oh, my god! What are you doing here?!"
She hugs me excitedly and nods toward Holden. "Your boyfriend flew me out. Happy Birthday."
Turning around to look back at him, I jump into his arms. He catches me with ease and spins me around before putting me down.
"I can't possibly thank you enough." I tell him. "This is the best birthday ever."
He turns me to face away from him and wraps his arms around my waist while all my friends come over to greet me and say happy birthday. As nervous as I've been to see people, Holden was right. No one seems to care about that video anymore. It's like it's already been erased from their memories.
HALFWAY THROUGH THE PARTY, everyone's having an amazing time. Drinks are flowing and people are dancing. I'm leaning against the island in the kitchen with Holden on one side of me and Emily on the other. Dawson, Bree, and Skylar are all standing near us as Caleb and I go back and forth about who is better at beer pong. I'm about to win the argument, when the sound of slow clapping makes everyone go silent. A few people step to the side, until Jade is standing in front of me with an arrogant look on her face.
"Well, isn't this sweet." She sasses. "My invitation must have gotten lost."
Within seconds, Bree and Skylar are standing defensively in front of me. Holden pulls me closer to him, while Emily looks between Jade and I – wondering what's going on. I take a step forward, lightly separating Bree and Sky.
"What are you doing here, Jade?" I spit angrily.
She mocks offense and puts her hand on her chest. "I'm here to celebrate your birthday, of course. I brought you a little party favor." She takes out a little baggie of white powder and shakes it before tossing it onto the floor in front of me. I'm about to reply when everything registers with Emily.
"Wait one fucking minute." She barks as she steps up next to me. "This is the bitch who got you into that stuff?" I nod. "And the one who sent that video around to the entire campus?"
"Same girl." Bree confirms.
"Who the fuck are you?" Jade questions with attitude.
Emily smiles sweetly before taking a step toward her. "I'm Kayleigh's best friend, which makes me your worst nightmare."
Before anyone can stop her, Emily swings with her right fist and punches Jade directly in the face. Grabbing her by the hair, she continues to pound on her while Jade fails miserably to defend herself. People gather around, recording the fight – but no one dares to try to break it up. Instead, we just stand back and watch the girl I'd trust with my life, beat the shit out of the one who tried to destroy it.
Chapter 22
Three days later, the video of Emily fighting Jade is still circulating around campus. I don't know what makes me happier – the fact that the attention is fully off me, or that the caption to the video is 'Karma's a Jaded Bitch'. Needless to say, Emily made sure Jade will never come near me again.
Jade lies on the floor, face covered in blood as Emily kicks her once more in the stomach. The only sign of injury on my best friend is a piece of her hair extensions in Jade's clenched hand.
"Alright, Rocky." Caleb declares as he pulls Emily away from her. "As much as I'm enjoying this, I don't think murder is something you want on your record. Though judging by the look of things, I'm sure you'd do just fine in prison."
"Let me go! I'm not done yet!" Emily yells as she thrashes in Caleb's arms.
Holden snickers next to me. "Put her down, Sutter." Everyone looks at him as if he's lost his mind. "What? It's not like she doesn't deserve it."
Jade slowly pushes herself up off the floor, wiping the blood off on her sleeve. "Really, Kayleigh? You just let her beat on me like that?"
Emily gets out of Caleb's grasp and jumps in front of me. "No. You don't get to talk to her. You don't even think her name, or I swear to God – I’ll come back here, and I will finish you."
Bree and Skylar stand on each side of Emily, shielding me from Jade entirely. "I think you should go now." Bree remarks.
Jade spares one last glance at me before grabbing her stomach and walking out of the house. Em turns around to face me and I lunge towards her, wrapping my arms around her neck and hugging her tightly. She chuckles as we embrace.
; "No one fucks with my best friend and gets away with it. Especially not some lowlife crack whore."
Since that night, Emily is a legend at a school she doesn't even go to, and Jade has made sure to stay far away from me. A part of me almost felt bad for her. Holden fixed that, though, before it could become anything more than a thought – reminding me about how she attempted to ruin my life. From that point forward, the only time she has crossed my mind is when someone talks about how my best friend from back home taught her a lesson she'll never forget.
As for Holden and I, we're currently on our way to the airport – destination: Holden's family's house for Thanksgiving. Josephine is meeting us there, which has me panicking since I found out Jason told her about the infamous cocaine video. Despite Holden's constant assurance that she doesn't hold it against me, I can't help but worry that he's wrong.
"Does everyone know? I mean, is there anyone who doesn't know?" I ask, holding his hand in the backseat of the cab.
He rests his head back against the seat. "The only person I told was Brandon."
I nod slightly. "I already assumed that. He's your best friend." Taking a deep breath, I try to relax. "Okay, so just Brandon and Jo. I can handle that."
After arriving at the airport and making our way through security, we finally get to the terminal and find Jo is already there waiting. My heart starts to race as I think about this being the first time I've seen her since she found out about my past. Thankfully, she jumps up and runs over to hug me.
"I'm so excited for Thanksgiving. My family, seeing my friends, the view of the beach. I love the start of the holidays, don't you?"
Holden chuckles beside me. "Easy, hyperactive. You've got more energy than the plane."
"Or someone on a little white stimulant?"
"Jo!"
I put my hand on Holden's chest to calm him down. "No, it's fine. I had that one coming."
She links her arm through mine and leads me to the seat beside her. "I'm only kidding. It's not like I haven't tried the stuff."
Endless December (Sleepless November Saga Book 2) Page 13