“I just wanted you to know that I have no clue what is going on but there is just something about you I find very appealing beyond the sexual sense of the word. You could really be someone, you know, important in my life and I couldn’t leave without telling you.”
I laughed out loud then as the rum and the few sips of mojito I’d had begun to kick in with a vengeance. “You’re some piece of work, you know that? Let me guess? It’s because my family is richer than God and I am easy on the eyes. Yeah, every sorry line you’re feeding me I have heard before. Don’t think you’ll be some kind of ‘virgin surgeon’ and I am just gonna hand my cherry over to you because you’re the lead singer of Scarlet Fever. Baby, if you want me, you are going to have to work for it.”
We stopped walking and he turned me toward him. Despite his intoxication, his eyes were clear and his expression, mesmerizing. “Don’t you think I already know that? I just wanted the air to be clear between us because to be completely honest, I don’t have time for games. I have a son and a bitch ex-wife who did nothing but play with my heart the whole time we were together.”
We resumed walking as he kicked a pebble away with the chocolate brown biker boots he wore despite being dressed in a pair white jeans which fit him perfectly and an army fatigue colored wife-beater.
“I really thought she was the one and we had something special. She was beautiful and the opposite of you in every way. Dominican and Croatian—what a combo, eh? Only in L.A.! However she wasn’t interested in me as a person. All she could see were the dollar signs and how much could I give her and that hurt me more than you can imagine.
“It’s been a year and a half since our marriage was dissolved and I’m still not over her. It wasn’t the fifty million dollar payout or the fact that she got shared custody of our kid despite having two full time nannies because her charities are more important than our son. It was the betrayal and the deception. I promised myself if I ever fell for another woman again, I would give it to her straight and if she couldn’t handle it then she wasn’t for me.”
I looked at him, mesmerized by his profile. “I don’t believe in games but then again, I have never been in love either so this isn’t easy for me and I wasn’t expecting…this when Scarlet Fever was hired to play at my birthday gig. I thought perhaps we could have some fun and then you would go your way and I would go mine.”
“Not gonna happen, baby girl, because I don’t roll that way. If you’re gonna be with me, you’re really gonna be with me and I can wait. I’m a patient man but if all I want is a quick roll in the hay, I can find that without any complications and we’ll just be the band that played on your twenty-third birthday. Do you feel me?”
I nodded my head as he looked at me before I inquired, “What was that all about? I mean, between Faith and Jaden knowing her name? I know she’s famous in our society circles but it’s not like she advertises who she is. I think she is using Faith Cohen in Los Angeles because she doesn’t want people to know who she is and Mel Cohen is her step-father.”
Kaz glared at me with cold aquamarine eyes. “That’s between Jaden and Faith but all I can tell you is there’s a bit of history there and it didn’t end well for either one of them. If they patch things up, it’s cool but she broke his heart and to be honest, I didn’t think he had one to break.”
“So, are you going to walk me back to the yacht or what? I really should start to pretty myself up for tonight’s festivities and I must admit it is a huge coup to know that Scarlet Fever will be playing especially for me.”
He stopped us from walking and grabbed me by the shoulders with a firm yet gentle grip. “What’s it gonna be, baby girl? I can see the wheels turnin’ in your head but I gotta know what’s gonna go down between us?”
I smiled ingratiatingly and tried to pull myself back together but his gaze, the feel of his warm skin on mine was making the task that much harder.
I could play the bitch and the vixen but showing my softer side was easier than I ever imagined with this man and he scared the living crap out of me. We didn’t know one another and had just met the previous night yet the pull was there, the energy was there. He was slowly breaking down the many barriers I had put up against love and lust and I didn’t like it one bit. If the walls around my heart were to fall down, it should have been my choice and I could see he’d made that impossible and somewhere deep inside, I hated myself for being so weak for him.
Somehow I managed to pull myself together before I licked my lips and replied in a raspy voice, “I’ll let you know tonight.”
“That’s good enough for me.” His left arm slid around my waist and we began to walk again. “In the meantime, it would be an honor to walk you back to the yacht.”
I smiled and thought if this was a game then today had been a draw based upon this conversation because neither of us had truly gotten what we had sought out and that hurt more than I ever thought it would.
Chapter Five
Reality Bites
True to his word, Kaz walked me back to the yacht and I called both Laurel and Faith to assure they were all right before I took a shower and dressed in my party gown. In my case, it was courtesy of my mother: a pale pink Hervé Leger bandage dress which was strapless and possessed a sweetheart neckline. It was a one of kind my mother had designed especially for me, her little princess.
I was about to leave my straight hair down before I realized it did nothing for my appearance and therefore, I slipped it into a chignon. After that, I fastened the expensive pink diamond necklace my grandfather had given me for my twenty-first birthday and slid into a pair of Yves Saint Laurent Tribute platform sandals in metallic pink.
I did my makeup with the utmost care, paying attention to dark eyeliner and mascara which brought out my blue-gray eyes, nude cover up and followed it by a pale pink gloss which only added a sexy sheen to my lips. Afterwards, I appraised myself in the mirror and had to admit I looked perfect. Five gold stars for me because I was absolutely irresistible that night.
There was a soft knock on my door as I began to spray perfume on the most intimate parts of me, including between my inner thighs, behind my ears and my forearms.
I looked towards the double set of doors as I set the bottle of SJP NYC down on the bureau before I said, “Come in.”
Faith walked in looking drop dead gorgeous as usual and I wondered how the hell she could manage to outdo me in the fashion department at my own birthday party. She wore a body-hugging, black Versace dress which was sleeveless with a signature print going down the sides. The dress showed the perfect amount of cleavage and since she’d paired the dress with black suede Dolce and Gabbana high heel sandals, she looked elegant and tasteful with her hair up in French Twist, understated makeup with the exception of bright red lipstick and her signature scent.
She walked over and embraced me before she whispered, “Happy birthday,” in my ear. “You look absolutely gorgeous. If you don’t score tonight with Kaz, I will be highly disappointed.”
“Speaking of the band, what happened to you earlier today? One minute we were all having drinks and the next minute, you ran out of there like your ass was on fire. What gives?” I said as we separated and stared at one another.
She shrugged her shoulders as she looked away and refused to face me. “I wasn’t ready to see Cocky yet and all the sudden, there he was. This was supposed to be our day, our girly tradition of getting drunk and having fun on one another’s birthday. Then he showed up at our place with the rest of the band and I knew what would happen. I can’t go through all that shit again.”
“So, it’s Cocky now? You must be pretty familiar with Jaden if you address him by his stage name.”
“Well, it’s not like he missed my company or anything. I heard he was all over Laurel like a cheap suit the moment I left.”
“For fuck’s sake, Faith, the guy was drunk and all they did was talk. I spoke to Laurel and nothing happened between them. She’s more into Will anyway and spent mos
t of the day chatting him up.” I sighed because I didn’t want to get into an argument with her especially on the night when we were supposed to be having fun. “What ever happened between you and Jaden, you left a major impression…Kaz told me you broke his heart.”
“That motherfucker doesn’t have a heart to break!” Faith exclaimed in a sudden rush of anger before she calmed down and regained her composure. “We had a short lived affair in L.A. It didn’t last long because they were working on their album and getting all the details sorted for their upcoming tour with Winter’s Regret. It didn’t stop him from shagging some other chick he met while on the piss with the guys.”
“Listen to us—‘chatting him up’, ‘shagging’, ‘on the piss’—who the fuck do we think we are? Brits?” I laughed out loud and it wasn’t long before Faith joined in.
“Sorry, it’s that damned gap year we spent in the UK. Remember all the fun we had? I still love that time in our lives because for one whole year, the three of us were inseparable.”
I smiled at the memory too.
From age eighteen to nineteen, Laurel, Faith and I had spent a year in England. It was easy to do because both Laurel and I had European citizenship through our parents (mine came from my Norwegian grandfather and my mother by proxy and Laurel’s came from her Danish father). Faith’s mother was Scottish and had immigrated to the States as an adult while pregnant with her. She later met Faith’s step-father, whom she married, but her birth father was from Northern Ireland and still resided in the UK therefore she automatically had British citizenship being the daughter of two British citizens.
Three American chicks and we had had the time of our life living in a dope apartment in Canary Wharf while we traveled across Europe for weekends and weeks at a time. We managed to visit my grandfather’s homeland, Laurel’s father’s homeland not to mention all the times we visited Belgium, France, the Netherlands, Germany, Italy and Spain. We must have been to the Canary Islands at least ten times and Ibiza alone for five of them. It was a great time and we’d made some great memories.
Meanwhile, I’d still returned a virgin while Faith and Laurel had both done their damage and slept with quite a few men each.
Those were the good old days but at that moment, my mind was firmly in the present and a certain person I couldn’t wait to see.
“Come on, let’s get to the party because I desperately need a drink!” I proclaimed out loud.
We walked out together and strolled into the main ballroom where my friends and the band were hanging out. My mother and grandfather were there along with a handful of their friends but they had segregated themselves into a private section. I said my hellos and embraced both of them before everyone at their table wished me a happy birthday and shooed me away. Apparently, I’d interrupted a very important business conversation.
I joined Laurel and Faith who were seated at the head table with the band and noticed how Faith went out of her way not to address Jaden though he continued to stare in her direction. Laurel had brought her sister, Sasha, who favored the Danish genes more than she did. She looked slightly exotic with her light olive skin, amber-brown eyes and petite frame but the rest of her features were markedly Scandinavian with her small nose, perfect cheekbones and heart-shaped mouth. They were “Irish twins”, barely separated by eleven months but Sasha was the older and shyer of the two. She was sandwiched between Grant and Jaden which made it a bit awkward for her but she seemed to be holding her own.
Unlike us slackers, she actually had graduated from Yale University and possessed a degree in Marketing. She worked for a top advertising firm in Manhattan and what I didn’t know at the time Scarlet Fever had persuaded her to leave her prestigious position and be their personal press manager. The current one they had obviously wasn’t working out or so many of the shenanigans they got into wouldn’t have shown up in the press, especially TMZ, which seemed to have a hard-on for reporting every unsavory thing the band members had ever involved themselves or encountered through no fault of their own.
I sat down at my seat of honor which happened to be wedged between Kaz on my left and Faith on my right. Laurel sat next to her left and on the other side was Jaden. Not only had my best friend made it impossible for her ex to have a conversation with her but she didn’t have to look at him and her eyes never drifted in his direction though he glanced at her quite often.
Kaz turned to me while holding a glass of expensive Macallan in an elegant crystal glass and whispered in my ear, “You look beautiful.”
My insides shivered though on the outside my body was heated with desire and longing from the sound of his voice being so close to me; I wondered what the hell was wrong and why was a guy having this kind of effect on my body? It seemed wrong somehow because I had never needed men to make me happy.
I believed it was part of the reason why I was a twenty-three year old virgin with lots of sexual experience but not one man I’d met was special enough to break my cherry…yet. Perhaps I’d finally met my match and this terrified me because I wanted to make sure my defenses were up and in place. Somehow with Kaz, that wasn’t possible at all.
“What’s happening to you?” Faith inquired for my ears only. “You’re positively glowing. I do believe Kasper is working his usual magic but I just didn’t think it would affect you.”
She was right and this made me angry because that’s all this guy was doing. Yeah, he’d told me part of his life story but nothing I couldn’t have found out from the tabloids, online or Wikipedia for the matter. It meant nothing. Everything he did was just a prolonged seduction to get into my La Perla thong and that pissed me off big time because when I gave it up, it was going to be my decision and no one else’s.
I turned toward him and those gorgeous aquamarine eyes lit up his beautiful manly face. “Nice try but no cigar. I told you I wouldn’t play your game, Kaz—”
“And I also told you this wasn’t a game,” he hissed underneath his breath before he swigged from his scotch. “Listen, you don’t want to be with me, that’s fine. We’ll do our set and tomorrow, we’ll be off this goddamn yacht. I don’t have time to play with little girls who are too frightened to explore their own fuckin’ sexuality.”
And just like that he turned on me. There it was in all of its naked glory. The rock star side of him, that animal male side and the sexual side all rolled into one. He’d changed from a guy who genuinely liked me to the lead singer of Scarlet Fever in the blink of an eye who couldn’t give a fuck about anything or anyone. All that mattered was the music; the girls, the parties, the booze and the drugs were inconsequential and he couldn’t be bothered about me or anyone else for the matter.
I could definitely turn on a dime myself and all the sudden, I was the rich bitch whose Grandfather had paid a mint for Scarlet Fever to perform like circus animals at my birthday party. So far, all they’d done was take advantage of the expensive food and drink and hadn’t done much more than that other than schmooze with my friends and try to nail down my best friends into fucking them before they were on their way. It was definitely a long time coming they did what they were being paid to do.
“Listen, I feel like listening to some music. Aren’t there any musicians on this fucking yacht?” I inquired loudly to no one in particular.
Will, Jaden and Grant all looked directly at Kaz as he downed his scotch and stood. “Well, you heard the lady. Let’s get ready.”
I smiled ingratiatingly toward him before I said, “Why thank you. I was wondering if perhaps what my grandfather paid you for this gig wasn’t quite enough.”
“Oh it was enough all right, plenty when we have to put up with a spoiled princess used to getting her way,” Kaz replied directly to me with cold blue-green eyes.
“And you better watch your tongue before I make sure your contract is forfeited and you leave this boat with the clothes on your back!” I exclaimed in return.
Kaz smiled but it wasn’t pleasant and lacked any mirth. “You’re some piece
of work, you know that?”
I laughed out loud. “You better believe it.”
Chapter Six
The Concert
The band members warmed up their instruments as I talked to Faith and Laurel animatedly. She’d taken Kaz’s seat so we could all gossip without talking too loudly.
“Okay, what the hell was that and I thought you said you liked the guy!” Laurel exclaimed with all the melodrama she could conjure. “For God’s sake, I am trying to get close to Will and you are making my job damn near impossible.”
“Jesus H. Christ, why would you want to go there, Laurel? The guy is like twenty-five!” Faith mock-whispered before she sipped from her champagne. “Translation: he can’t fuck for shit and you’d be the one teaching him everything. Why not Grant? Now there is a man who looks like he knows what to do in the bedroom and then some.”
“Because I am officially wooing Grant and my sister wouldn’t dare shoplift cock, especially from me,” a silky voice announced.
I looked up to see Sasha and she smiled in a pretty fashion. “I suppose they got what they wanted out of you then?”
“And then some but the contract they are offering is nothing like my salary and I work for one of the best advertising firms in New York. They want me to be the exclusive publicist for Scarlet Fever and Winter’s Regret. Apparently, you gals know one of the members…Talia—does the name wring a bell?”
I smirked. “Yeah, we know her. We also know her whole crew which is led by a Ms. Jerrica Peterson. It’s a small circle and you are also familiar with her so why are you acting all coy?”
“I don’t like Seth Delvecchio. The guy gives me the creeps and although I am more than happy to represent Scarlet Fever, dealing with him cost them extra. They were willing to pay because they know Winter’s Regret will cough up the money. Anyway, we all know what guys in the band we want so why is this an issue at all?”
Falling Into Lust Page 3