*****
Alex’s jaw clenched as he watched his wife and brother embrace. He’d known Kurt cared for her, but didn’t realize how much until now. And watching Anna cling to him didn’t make him feel any better.
His head told him that he shouldn’t be surprised. She’d spent more time with Kurt than she had with himself.
Alex’s heart was being torn apart. Anna had loved Kurt. Did she still? If it weren’t for Devin’s interference, they would be married and Alex would be out of the picture. It was the only thing Alex would ever thank Devin for.
Alex stood there for a few minutes and then walked into the library and poured himself a drink. Maybe he shouldn’t have had Kurt come. Maybe he should have told Vati and Kurt to just go home after the funeral was over.
He walked to the window that overlooked Central Park and stared out at the orange lights that dotted the huge rectangle. Was it possible that he was actually jealous of his little brother? He’d never felt that before. Kurt was always popular with the women, but given the choice, the woman would choose Alex over Kurt. More than once, he’d taken advantage of that fact.
Kurt’s anger made more sense now. A lot more sense. Alex would probably feel the same way if he were in his brother’s shoes. Hell, Kurt had even divorced Gretchen so that he could marry Anna. Not that the divorce was necessarily a bad thing. It got rid of a blight in the family.
He heard footsteps behind him and turned to see Vati striding into the room.
“He loves her, doesn’t he?” Alex said in German.
“Yes, son. He does.”
Alex sighed and looked back out the window. “I realize there is one thing I can thank Devin for.”
“Oh?”
“For interfering and not letting the two of them get married.”
Wilhelm chuckled softly. “Yes, I suppose you could.”
“If they had gotten married...I would have lost her, right?”
His father sighed. “Yes. Although I could have forced a divorce. Or just declared the marriage annulled. I’m glad it didn’t come to that.”
“Me, too.”
*****
Anna gave Kurt a sad smile as they sat on the couch. “I’m sorry you’re hurting Kurt. It’s the last thing in the world I want for you.”
Kurt grimaced. “I love my brother, but sometimes I wish he had not returned.”
She understood. Although she belonged with Alex, she couldn’t help but miss Kurt. Kurt, Hugo, Peter...all men that she had spent time with...that she had fallen in love with while Alex was gone. Was it wrong for her heart to ache for them?
Suddenly, Kurt smiled and got a glint in his eye. “You know, Alex and I used to share women....”
Anna giggled. “I don’t think he’d be keen on sharing me anymore, though we did talk about it before he...disappeared.” She took his hand. “You’ll make a wonderful husband for a good German wife.”
He grimaced. “I think I have slept with all the women in Frankfurt.”
Anna laughed. “So you can’t marry them?”
“None were interesting enough to call again.” He gave her a half-smile. “Guess I will have to look around here.”
Anna rolled her eyes, but was glad to see the old Kurt emerging.
Kurt leaned forward and kissed her cheek. “If Alex ever hurts you, let me know. I can almost keep up with him in a fight now.”
Anna laughed and then looked up to see Alex frowning at them. She sobered immediately. Kurt saw her looking and turned around.
“Do not worry, big brother. I will not try and steal her away.”
“Gut.” Alex sat down heavily on the couch with a drink in his hand. He gave her a pointed look and she went to sit next to him.
He pulled her close and she felt a tremor of fear. Was he jealous? Would he lash out at her?
*****
Later, as Anna was changing for bed, Alex came into the walk-in closet with an apologetic look on his face. She clutched her top to her chest, covering her breasts, more out of habit than anything else.
“I’m sorry I was acting jealous,” he said softly. “I scared you, didn’t I?”
She nodded.
“I don’t recall ever being jealous of my brother before. I’ve always had confidence, never doubting my place in the world. After being gone for so long....” He shook his head. “I’m having trouble figuring out where I fit. Everyone moved on, which they should have. But, it leaves me a little lost.”
Anna’s heart ached, listening to his humble confession. Confidence had always been part of him, and to hear him struggling was heart-wrenching. She let her top fall to the ground and stepped closer, taking his hand. “I know exactly where you fit,” she said softly and walked out of the closet and to their bed, pulling him gently behind her.
Chapter Thirty-Nine
Alex smiled politely at the blonde and redhead walking past him, Greg, Tony and Seth. Their eyes traveled over each man, giving them knowing looks and then walked slowly away, swinging their hips seductively.
Tonight was the Fall Gala for the City Ballet, and everyone who was anyone was in attendance. He was doing a lot of polite smiling. He’d forgotten how vulture-like women could be in social situations.
It was finally intermission and Alex was eager for it to be over so he could see Anna dance. Hugo’s new ballet was the second half of the program.
“You know, you can pick up women,” Alex said to his men with a chuckle. “As long as one of you is available, I don’t care.”
Greg rolled his eyes. “I’ve been out of the game for so long, I’m not even sure where to begin.”
Alex laughed, though Greg’s comment made him a little sad. It was his fault his men had been locked up. “I think smiling and saying hello is all you need to do.” He grinned. “Or do we need to go out to a bar?”
Seth grinned back. “Might be nice to go out, not hiding behind a curtain.”
“Or Anna and I could stay in this weekend and give you a few days off to carouse and conquer.”
“Might be easier to pick up women without you around,” Tony said with a laugh.
The idea of staying in all weekend with Anna was very appealing. Last night he’d been reminded of how magnificent her mouth was and he felt his cock twitch just thinking about it. Down boy. She certainly helped his confidence, letting him know exactly where he fit in her life: in her heart and in between those amazingly sexy legs of hers.
Simon approached with a lovely blonde on his arm; his wife, Emma. “Suffering through the attention, Alex?” he asked in German. They were sitting with Alex and his men in the theater, but had arrived just before the performance began and hadn’t had a chance to speak.
Alex rolled his eyes. “You could have kept it quiet about who I was.”
“It’s easier to just put it out there. In the end, you will garner less attention. I did say that you were married.”
“I don’t think that part has gotten spread around as much as it should,” Alex grumbled, politely smiling at another woman trying to get his attention.
“There was a time when Alex reveled in this attention,” Seth remarked with a laugh.
“That was a long time ago. A very long time ago.”
Simon smiled at Alex. “Things are going well, I presume?”
Alex gave Simon a goofy grin, making him laugh. “Yes. I can’t wait to see her dance tonight.”
Simon grinned. “I think I like this connection to you. I’ve never been able to attend the Gala before.”
“It’s the least I could do in repayment for all you’ve put up with these last few months.”
Emma laughed. “He’s enjoyed it more than he will admit. I think he may have developed a crush on your pretty wife.”
“She’s a sweet girl,” Simon said with a shrug. “But not tempting enough to lure me away from you.” He kissed Emma on the cheek and she beamed.
The lights flickered and Alex’s heart pounded. “It’s time.”
They m
ade their way to their seats in the first balcony, known as the first ring. Alex had hidden up here when he first came to watch Anna dance. Alex settled in as best he could. There were disadvantages to being six and a half feet tall and broad shouldered, especially when the men next to him were the same. Maybe not as tall, but he and Seth were about the same width now, and Tony was about where Alex was before they’d gotten captured.
Anna didn’t seem to mind though. He loved catching her watching him as he did something without his shirt on. He’d barely worn his shirt at home the last few days, just so he could know she was watching him. Then again, he found himself surreptitiously watching her in the shower, finding some excuse to be in the bathroom. It had been so long since he’d seen a live, naked woman, he couldn’t help himself.
He hadn’t been with a woman since the second year of his imprisonment, save as Mr. J. with Anna, and while that had been nice, it had been less than satisfactory. Lovemaking without Anna’s arms around him had been difficult, but satisfied his itch temporarily. He did everything he could to make sure Anna enjoyed it too, but always had to be sure to hold her hands down. She wasn’t trying to be rebellious, but whenever he didn’t hold them, they inevitably strayed to his body. It was sheer hell pulling her hands away from him, but he'd kept telling himself that it wouldn’t always be that way.
At first, when he was captured, he’d shunned Vitaly’s offers of Dirne. But despair hit him hard after the first year. There was no escape. He’d lost three men trying to do so. The guards watched them like hawks over mice, and had even shot him in the shoulder for looking suspicious. After finding out Anna had been drugged up for two years, it made more sense that no one had noticed her hurting from his injury. He’d never seen that guard again after it happened, and wondered if the guard had gotten into trouble.
Anna didn’t come, and after a year, he was desperate for anything to feel better. But sex hadn’t worked. Nothing worked, although when one of Vlad’s daughters had snuck up, he took her with pleasure, thinking Vlad wouldn’t be happy with it. When Vlad found out, several months later, he’d been furious. Alex had savored the look of horror on Vlad’s face when Yelena told her father that she was pregnant with Alex’s child.
The memory hit Alex in the stomach and he nearly doubled over. He ran his hand through his hair and shuddered. He had forgotten about that. Yelena lost the baby before it could be born, and Alex had wondered if it had happened naturally or not.
Vlad had tried to blame Alex, but what could Alex have done to prevent it? Besides the obvious one of not fucking her? It wasn’t as if he had access to condoms in his prison. He’d told Vlad that he couldn’t tell the difference between his daughter and a Dirne, and Vlad hadn’t taken that very well, but Alex enjoyed the fury on the other man’s face. It matched his own.
After Vitaly died, Alex had asked Vlad what had happened and Vlad confessed that he had “arranged” for Yelena to lose the baby; she didn’t know that the miscarriage had been induced. It was for the best all around that the baby hadn’t been born. Especially in light of Alex’s escape. He didn’t need reminders of his captivity, nor did Anna. Yelena had married last year and was happy. She was a sweet girl, but Alex had no feelings for her. He had used her to get revenge with his captors.
After the incident with Vlad’s daughter, there were no more Dirne for quite a while. Punishment, he supposed, but it wasn’t much of one. Yelena being pregnant just reminded him of Anna. That she had been glowing with pregnancy when he’d left. Despair and depression had crept in again and he did very little except sit in his chair and stare at the spot where Anna had stood, willing her to come back, but she didn’t.
“You okay?” Seth asked quietly as the lights began to fade.
“Yeah,” he said, rubbing his face. He had told Vati about the baby and they decided that Anna didn’t need to know about it. At least not right now. There was too much for her to absorb at the moment. Maybe he would tell her about it later. He wasn’t trying to hide it. He was just trying to be sensitive to Anna’s level of acceptance.
Alex needed to get control of his emotions before he saw Anna at the Gala dinner. She was beginning to be able to sense his emotions, and the last thing she needed was to find out about Yelena.
The music began and Alex became lost in the ballet. Watching Anna was beauty in motion. Something had been elevated in the last few days. Her dancing became even more beautiful, if that were possible. She was captivating.
The story was a simple boy meets girl story, set to music by a Russian composer Alex had not heard of, but it was entrancing. Anna and Hugo had a true synergy when they danced together, making Alex wonder briefly if Hugo had some Immortal in him. When she danced with Peter it had felt similar.
He tried to deny the jealousy that began to stab at his heart. The look on her face as they danced together was beautiful, and heart breaking. She loved Hugo, and he looked at her the same way. He held her like the precious gem she was, gazing adoringly into her eyes.
Alex shifted uncomfortably in his seat. Had he made a mistake coming back? Trying to renew their relationship? Was it fair to Anna? After all, she’d moved on. Hugo was the only man she’d taken her ring off for.
But Hugo couldn’t protect her the way Alex could. No, Anna was where she needed to be. With Alex.
But was he being cruel, taking her away from her lover?
Alex didn’t like these doubts. He wasn’t used to doubting his place, doubting his decisions. Since he’d escaped, he found himself doubting almost everything he did. It was very uncomfortable. He didn’t like it one little bit.
*****
Anna hummed as she put on her long, black lace dress. The corset top had thin lace straps at the edge of her shoulders and the skirt was fitted, though not obscenely so. She checked herself in the mirror, wanting to look perfect for Alex.
Alex. Her heart swelled with love for him. She loved dancing with Hugo, but the whole time, she was thinking about how Alex was in the audience, watching her dance. She danced for him and him only. The more she thought about him, the more she felt like she was floating in mid-air.
There was a knock at her door and she went to answer it, knowing it was either Hugo or Aaron. She smiled when she saw both, looking very handsome in their tuxedos.
Aaron smiled and then groaned, glancing at Hugo. “You don’t get used to it.”
“Get used to what?” Anna asked.
“You. Not being mine. Not being Hugo’s.”
Anna’s face fell. “I’m sorry,” she said, not knowing what to do. She didn’t want to upset her friends.
Aaron chuckled and hugged her. “I was teasing...somewhat. Don’t feel bad.”
She glanced at Hugo, who gave her an affectionate smile. “I would love to still be with you, Kittycat,” he said in a soft voice, hugging her. “But seeing you the last few days makes me realize how much you belong with Alex. You glow.” He kissed her cheek and released her.
“Disgusting, isn’t it?” Aaron said with a laugh.
Anna’s mood lifted at their laughter. They were happy for her, not angry.
Chapter Forty
The three dancers arrived in the promenade a few minutes later. Hugo and Aaron went to find out where they were sitting. Anna already knew where to go: Table One, with Alex.
The huge room was decorated in the colors of fall: green, gold, yellow and red. At the center of each table sat a tall golden urn with strands of autumn leaves hanging over the edge. The tablecloths were white, but the underskirts were different fall colors at each table. It felt as if she had walked into the middle of Central Park, except that people were dressed in formalwear instead of jeans and jackets.
Anna nodded greetings to people she recognized as she made her way to table one. Tom, Tommy and their wives were there, as were Vincent and his partner, Walter, the mayor and his wife, and another couple she didn’t know. She didn’t see Alex and she frowned. There were two empty seats, so she knew she was heading to t
he right table, but she didn’t see her tall, handsome husband anywhere.
Tom spotted her as she approached and stood to greet her. “Katrina,” he said kissing her cheek. “You were even more wonderful than in the spring, if that’s possible.”
She greeted the others around the table and then looked around. “Where’s Alex?” she asked Tom.
Tom looked around. “He mentioned something about getting some air.”
“Oh.” Anna sat down next to Tom, disappointed. No, hurt was more like it. Why would he not be here when she arrived?
“Hello, Miss Katrina.”
Anna looked up to see Simon standing next to her. She smiled and stood. “Hi, Simon. I didn’t expect to see you here.”
Simon grinned. “Alex helped.”
Anna’s smile wasn’t as bright as it would have been, had Alex been next to her.
“Katrina, I’d like to introduce you to my wife, Emma. Emma, this is Katrina.”
The beautiful blond woman standing next to Simon extended her hand. “Hello, Katrina,” she said with a slight accent. German probably. “It is wonderful to meet you at last. I’ve heard much about you.”
Anna greeted her, wondering what she’d heard about her. “It’s nice to meet you, too. It never occurred to me that Simon was married.”
Emma gave a playful look to Simon and laughed. “Pretending to be single again?”
“It never was an issue. I was merely conducting business on behalf of my employer.” Simon gave Anna a friendly smile and looked around. “Speaking of...where is he?”
Anna bit her lip. “I don’t know. Tom said he went out for air.”
Simon frowned and looked behind him. She saw Tony and Greg sitting there. “Where’d Alex go?” Simon asked.
Tony shrugged. “Outside somewhere. Seth is with him.”
The Life of Anna, Part 5: Emerged Page 32