by London Casey
I grabbed the wheel and screamed, pulling as hard as I could.
The car jumped to the right.
Lance called me a bitch - the last time he’d ever get a chance to do that.
He was too drunk to react. Too angry to react. Too shocked to react.
I had two hands on the wheel, fighting him, lining the car up, knowing what I was about to do.
I looked at Lance one last time and for the first time I saw fear in his face. Finally. That fucking look that had been plastered across my face so many times, it was now on his face.
Lance wrestled with the wheel and hit the brakes.
But it was all happening too fast.
He had been speeding.
All it took were seconds, even though each one felt like an hour passing.
At the last second I let the wheel go and opened the door to my side. I rolled out of the car a second before it smashed into the tree.
The booming thud was just like thunder.
I was on my back, in complete silence, waiting for the rain to start. Waiting for the storm to come and go.
But there was just silence.
And there was no rain.
Just tears. My tears.
36
HAZEL
PRESENT DAY
I felt myself rolling. My mind screamed to watch out for the edge of the bed, but my heart was too deep in the dream. The weirdest part about the dream was that I didn’t know if it was a nightmare or not. In some ways, it was. In other ways, it was a dream that reminded me that I had been able to take control.
I put my hands out to brace myself for the fall out of bed.
But I wasn’t home. It wasn’t my bed. It wasn’t my setup.
I then felt a hand slide over my body and pull me from the edge.
I felt like I was being thrown, so I started to thrash my arms.
I kicked my legs, but they were shackled. They were just under blankets, but I felt captured.
“Hey, hey, sugar,” a voice whispered.
A rough voice. So rough that it was soothing.
I threw another elbow and my eyes popped open.
“Fuck,” a voice said.
Then a small light clicked on.
I gasped for air and looked to my right.
Maddox was propped up on his elbow, shirtless, holding his mouth.
I had hit him. I hit Maddox.
“Maddox, I’m so-”
Maddox grabbed me and pulled me close. His lips touched mine in a kiss that stole my apology.
“It’s okay, sugar,” he whispered. “Bad dream?”
“Something like that,” I whispered back.
Our lips were almost touching. I touched his cheek.
“I love you, Maddox.”
Maddox put a hand to my hair, squeezing…enough to show me he cared, but not so much as to scare me. He was the only man in the world who knew how to do that.
“I love you too, Hazel with the green eyes,” he said.
His hand then slowly moved down, caressing my cheek, sending chills through my entire body. His hand rested against my chest.
“Sugar, your heart is racing. What was the dream about?”
“It’s not the dream, Maddox, it’s you. You make my heart race.”
Maddox smiled. “Since we’re both awake, we might as well make good use of this time together.”
His lips brushed against mine again.
The first kiss was sweet and subtle. The second kiss not so much.
A few seconds later, I was holding onto his hair as he kissed me harder, faster, putting me on my back, his right hand gliding down my body and lifting my shirt up. It was the only piece of clothing I had on. And the shirt wasn’t even mine. It was a super big and long t-shirt plastered with the St. Skin logo.
Maddox’s hand touched my bare skin, and I groaned. I arched my chest, putting my head back, letting Maddox kiss down to my neck. The flicker of his tongue was just a tease, hinting at what he was capable of. As his fingers sought the comfort of my breast, I shivered, my nipples getting tight, hard, the sensitive feeling electrifying as his rough hand cupped me and squeezed. My heels then dug into the bed as my hips thrust. My body was ready for him.
His hand then decided to keep moving up. His other hand touched my back, grabbing another handful of my shirt. I sat up enough to let him take it off me. Now I was naked in his bed. I could revel in the coziness of his apartment, his room, his bed, and the comfort of his strong arms and his ability to love me and pleasure me.
With his left hand cupping the back of my head, his right hand made a small trail, tracing back over everywhere he had just touched. The line kept going, sliding between my legs, his fingers curling, discovering the wet heat that waited for him. He applied pressure to me, and I groaned again, my body jumping, eager for more of him.
Maddox kissed my lips one more time. “You don’t move until I tell you to, sugar.”
Then he inched down.
When his lips touched my chest, I shivered. My right hand touched his back, feeling muscles flexing as he balanced himself over me. Then came the swirl of his tongue around my left nipple. That was followed by a gentle, playful tug, making my back arch even more. Between my legs, his fingers made small circles, almost as though he was massaging me, but the way it felt wasn’t meant to calm me down or relax me.
I curled my toes against the sheets, craving for more.
And that’s just what I got from him.
As Maddox moved from my chest with a wet kiss, he then made a straight line down my body, kiss after kiss after kiss. I felt the scruff of his face scratching against my soft skin. It was so fucking sexy, being in tune with every move he made and how he made everything feel.
His left hand came down my body, resting against my hip, but only for a moment. He then reached for my right hand, interlocking our fingers. He squeezed my hand three times. At that point, his lips kissed the softness of my body, less than an inch from my slit. He looked up at me, a look so wickedly good, bad, evil, handsome, and everything in between.
I squeezed his hand back three times.
What did that mean? I love you? Be fucking ready? I’m having you?
Maddox moved his right hand from between my legs to my inner thigh.
Then he kissed me.
I sighed with relief.
He kissed my inner thigh where his hand wasn’t holding me.
His tongue touched between my legs, flickering against my sex, forcing my hips to quiver with need. Feeling him down there was pure, wild excitement, his tongue moving faster, harder, sliding up to my clit and adding enough pressure to make me lift my ass off the bed, stealing my breath away. I squeezed my hand to his, desperate to make a noise, but all that came out was a low moaning sound.
I crashed back to the bed when Maddox moved down a little. His tongue thrust into me, my body sheathing it, feeling him making wide circles, then moving right back up again. He turned his head just enough and took me into his mouth. I gasped and grabbed his hair, getting a handful. My hips rocked, grinding against his seductive kisses, the tip of his tongue racing in all directions, his lips and mouth suckling, bringing me to the edge of pleasure so fast.
I had a wild, fluttering feeling in my core, a feeling that was like a dam starting to break open.
My hips rocked with the rhythm Maddox had me going at.
“Yes,” I whispered into the partially lit bedroom. “Yes, Maddox, I’m so close…”
I heard him make a growling sound. He pulled away with a wet kiss, wetter than when he kissed my chest. His left hand was still locked tight to my right hand. But his right hand came up, his thumb sliding against my slit, stopping at my clit where he pressed and twisted his thumb.
I cried out, feeling myself losing it.
The moment his mouth touched me again, that was it.
My heels dug into the bed again, and I lifted up, shaking with pleasure as I reached my climax.
I managed to yell two wor
ds over and over…his name and the word yes! It was all my mental vocabulary had been temporarily reduced to.
When I lost my strength and started to fall, Maddox moved his hand around to my ass and held me. His tongue was as rampant as ever, guiding me through my pleasure, not stopping until we both had our fills.
And even then, he was perfectly wild…kissing down, nudging his nose against me with a groan, and then up again. His lips kissed super slow, super soft, only stopping just below my belly button.
Then he gave me the same wild look he had right before he tasted my sweet passion.
“Maddox…” I swallowed hard.
I was shivering as jolts of pleasure continued to spark throughout my entire body.
“Sugar, I’m not done yet…roll over…now…”
I felt the pressure of his chest against my back as he lowered himself down. Then I felt the swell of his cock as he positioned himself between my legs. I shuddered and groaned, trying to look back at him. He lovingly stroked my hair, pushing it to my left, leaving the right side of my face exposed. His arms were on the bed, and slowly, he came down, as though he was doing a pushup. I saw the muscles on his arms throbbing, making it look as if his tattoos had come to life.
His nose rubbed against my cheek a moment before his lips kissed me.
“I’ve got you, sugar,” he whispered, his hot breath teasing my ear. “I’ve got you tonight, tomorrow, and always. Just open for me and trust me.”
I opened my legs as far as I could. I bent my knees just a little, popping my ass up too. Slowly, his right hand moved down the bed and touched my hip, my ass, and then it was gone. That’s when I felt his cock touch me. That steel like thickness touching against my core.
“Fuck,” I groaned.
“Yeah, sugar,” he whispered.
He let out a breath that echoed with a deep growl in his chest. His lower body sank down and he entered me. My hands flipped over, palms to the sheets, closing tight, pulling as I couldn’t fight the urge to thrust back at him as he sank deeper.
So slow. So impossibly slow. So good though…
Offering himself to the hilt, I felt the rippling muscles of his stomach touch me when he breathed. He was breathing heavy, getting harder by the second, my body still pulsing to beat of my racing heart, sheathing and squeezing him as he rested inside me.
Maddox kissed me again and then turned his head, wanting a kiss from my lips. I twisted my neck as far as my body would allow.
The moment our lips touched, it was the hottest and sloppiest kiss of my life.
That’s when he pulled back. He pounded forward, driving himself into me, ploughing me into the bed.
I cried out as his tongue still flickered inside my mouth.
He went in again, getting faster.
And faster.
And faster.
His right hand gripped my hip fiercely, holding me wherever he wanted me. My body bounced from the bed, colliding with his body with the few inches that were between us.
The kiss was as messy and noisy, groan-filled—it was the best kiss of my life.
He loved me, and I loved him back. He loved me hard. He loved me fast. He loved me in a way that I never thought someone could love me. His hard body against my back. Moments when he’d speed up so fast that I would lose my breath for a few seconds but quickly regain it when he slowed down. He always knew when to slow, just enough to give me a second, before starting again.
I felt my fingers digging so hard into the sheets, I thought they were going to tear.
Maddox put fists to the bed and pushed back up, keeping distance between us. Then came the sound of his body colliding into mine. Echoing through the room. A sound so beautiful and laced with sex that it made my toes curl.
Maddox then made a sudden change of pace. He thrust into me and held there for a moment. Then he thrust again, harder, so deep inside me. I cried out as I tried to buck back at him, but I was all his. In his control. In his everything.
Maddox stayed just like that, inside me, thrusting, actually pushing me up the bed. I had to release my grip on the sheets and reach for the headboard to push back.
“Sugar, be ready for me,” Maddox warned.
Then he made another sudden move.
One hand dropped down from the bed and went between my legs. He touched me, I whimpered, and then he pulled me up a little. Maddox held me tight, kept himself tight inside me, and he stayed right there until he reached his own climax.
The moment I felt him start to come, his hand slid around to the small of my back, and he pushed, sending me belly-down to the bed. He came down with me, holding there, his body collapsing to mine.
I turned my head just in time to kiss him.
We kissed. He came. I came.
In the deepest part of my gut, however, I knew this was our last normal night together…because he was going to find out my secret…
37
MADDOX
PRESENT DAY
I carried coffee into the bedroom and watched her sleep. I gently put the two mugs down on the nightstand, spilling a little coffee on my hand, and I mouthed the word fuck until the burning sensation subsided.
She was just too beautiful. And seeing her like this, her guard down, it made her even more beautiful. I knew I couldn’t save her from everything in life or everything inside her, but I could damn well just be there. The way she was for me with my great aunt Ada.
To my left, I saw her bag on the floor. Her camera rested right on top.
I grabbed the camera, moving stealthily, making sure not to wake her up. I flipped on the switch and stared at all the damn buttons on it. I knew nothing about cameras, so I just put Hazel into the screen and pressed the black button to take the picture. The lens made a whirring sound as it brought itself into focus. Then a little black piece shot up, and the flash blinked a few times.
The camera then clicked, and the picture of Hazel appeared on the screen.
That’s what woke her up.
Her eyes opened, that green color hitting me in the head, heart, and gut at the same time. Enough to make me take an extra breath just to prove to myself that I was alive and not dreaming.
Hazel pushed up from the bed. The sheet fell down her body as she sat up. She grabbed it at the last second as she sat up.
“Payback,” I whispered. I set the camera on the bed. “Good morning, sugar.”
“Good morning,” she said. “What time is it?”
“Does that matter?”
“No.”
“Then forget what time it is.”
I leaned down and kissed her.
I tasted her sleep, and it made me want to taste that same thing every morning for the rest of my life.
“Coffee?” I asked.
“Please.”
I gave her the mug I prepared for her.
She sat in bed, holding the mug with two hands, blowing into it, sending light brown ripples across the surface like a kid skipping a stone into a lake during a summer’s night.
I grabbed for the camera again.
I stole another picture.
Hazel looked at me, one eyebrow raised. “You proved your point.”
“No point to prove,” I said. “You’re just too fucking beautiful.”
“Thanks.” She took a sip of coffee, staring straight ahead.
I nodded.
I turned the camera off and put it on the floor. I grabbed my coffee and climbed into bed next to her.
“What’s on your mind?”
“Huh?”
“You’re staring,” I said. “Something must be bothering you.”
“No.”
“Yes, Hazel,” I said. I touched her chin and smiled. “Don’t lie to me. You don’t have to talk to me, just don’t lie.”
She swallowed hard. “This feeling, Maddox. It’s so real.”
“I know.”
“You told me everything. You showed me everything. But I haven’t…”
“Right n
ow, just enjoy your coffee,” I said. “Enjoy my company. People would do anything for this company.”
“You say that to everyone you share coffee with in bed?” Hazel asked.
“If you want to know the truth, no. I don’t share coffee in my bed with anyone. Anything I ever had served a simple purpose. In, out, go.”
“So, you’re a man-whore?” she asked with a smile.
“Just your whore,” I said and kissed her cheek.
She laughed.
I loved the way she held her coffee mug. Her pointer, middle, and ring fingers on her right hand slid into the handle of the mug, her pinky under it. Then the same fingers on her left hand did the same, sliding over her righthand fingers. Cupping the mug and drinking it slow.
The entire moment was something. I almost wished I had a picture of it.
“You were right,” she said.
“Oh?”
“Something is bothering me.”
“I’m all ears if you want to talk. If not, then I’m all arms to hold you.”
“Dammit,” Hazel snapped.
“What?”
“When you say that kind of stuff…it…it makes me mad.”
“Mad? Why mad?”
“Because of how much I fucked up my life.”
I reached for my coffee, buckling up for whatever Hazel was about to say.
“We all have a journey, sugar.”
“I gave up my best friend for a guy.”
“I think everyone has done that at some point.”
“Maddox, it was serious. She used to help me with my makeup. When things got obvious-looking.”
I felt my nerves pinch. The images of someone hurting Hazel flashed in my mind, and I never wanted to see those images ever again.
“Her name was Donna. We were friends since grade school. She wanted to do makeup for movie stars. Instead, she covered up my bruises.”
“What happened?” I asked.