And it was the duty of a friend…or family, as the case may be. Ini curled against him, and he held her tight, tucking her head under his chin. The Queen in Blue could see the mysteries of the world and inside the hearts of those around her. That might have made a lesser soul cruel and cold over their thousands of years, like Vjo. Instead, Ini sought to shield others from the dark hands the future might deal those around her.
Oftentimes, he wondered if the pixie didn’t know more than she let on.
But they all had their secrets.
“Come, elf. Let us get you out of the cold.” It was beginning to snow again. Not much. But enough to start to leave a dusting on her hair and shoulders. While it didn’t bother him, he knew the elf preferred warmer weather.
“I need a fucking drink.” Kamira was already storming back toward the house that Jakob had loosely claimed as his own. Ini had taken up residence there as well, and…so had he, if reluctantly.
Kamira was too upset over Maverick’s loss to tease Dtu about how he now slept indoors. In a bed.
With a mortal.
He had no doubt that she would make up for lost time soon enough and would quickly annoy him to no end with her goading comments and playful mocking. But it helped that she clearly approved of Jakob. If she didn’t, the young mortal would likely have been torn to pieces already. Or merely threatened within an inch of his life if she was feeling particularly merciful.
He walked with Ini at his side, his arm around her shoulders, toward the house. He could smell cooking food, and his stomach rumbled. Sadly, he would not be able to partake. He would not take off his mask around the others. Ini was more flippant with hers of late since it had become more “fashionable” for the royals to go without from time to time. The new royals—Evie, Lyon, and Lydia—set that example. But for him, it was still hard to surrender something he had been with for so long.
But Jakob, patient and sweet creature that he was, would set aside food for him and then leave the room so he might be able to eat. Someday, perhaps, he would show the young man his true face. Someday, he might embrace him with every part of his soul bared.
He knew it didn’t matter to the human mortal. He bore no ink. He wasn’t of Under, and he took it all in stride with such a cheerful sense of humor that it made Dtu smile. Even now, he found himself smiling as they entered the warm home they had claimed as their own from whomever had surrendered it.
While he didn’t mind the cold, he did prefer the warmth. Jakob stood by the fire, jabbing at it with the poker, kicking up the flames. Kamira was already slumped on the sofa, a dark glass bottle of some kind of hard alcohol in her hand. She had wasted no time. Ini sat delicately on the cushions next to her.
Kamira pulled the cork from the neck of the bottle, took a swig, and handed it to Ini. “To Maverick.”
Ini removed her mask, took a swig, and placed her mask back on. She coughed. When she spoke, her voice was strained. “To Maverick. Goodness, Kamira, what are you drinking?”
“Don’t know. Don’t care.” His second in command tilted her head back and rested it against the back of the sofa.
Ini offered Dtu the bottle, and he shook his head once in silence. “I did not know him.”
“Neither did I, but I’ll still have some of that if you don’t mind.” Jakob chuckled and reached for the bottle. Ini handed it to him. He held it up in front of him. “Vith heilsum theim sem fara a undan okkur, thvi thier munu leithda heim.” He took a gulp of the bottle, coughed, hacked, and grinned at Kamira. “Good shit.”
“What did you say?” Dtu tilted his head slightly.
“We salute those who go before us, for they shall guide our way home. It’s an old prayer. I didn’t know him…but I know what killed him. I’ve lost people to the drengil.” Jakob sat down on a smaller loveseat style sofa by the fire. Dtu moved to sit beside him. Kamira smirked, but she kept her mouth shut.
“Oh?” Ini asked innocently.
“My father. My mother. My brother. My sister.” Jakob shrugged. “Everyone, I’m afraid. Every friend I’ve ever had. Every lover. Everyone I’ve ever cared about.” He passed the bottle back to Kamira.
Kamira lifted the bottle to him. “Here’s to you, then. For keeping that chipper smile on that cute face of yours, even when you have to put up with all that bullshit. And now having to put up with that big, ugly, grumpy asshole sitting next to you.” She took a swig.
Dtu growled in his throat. It only made her laugh.
Jakob shrugged and smiled. “I’m still alive. And as long as I’m alive, I have a chance to make new friends, and new families.”
“And new lovers,” Kamira muttered into the mouth of the bottle.
Ini whacked her on the arm. “Be nice. They haven’t even—” At Dtu’s louder growl, Ini broke off. “Oh. Sorry. Yes. Right. What does Lydia keep saying? Personal space applies to brains?”
Kamira shot Dtu a shocked look, and then cracked her lopsided grin. “You two haven’t slept together yet? Come on, Dtu. Is that thing between your legs finally dead? Are you finally going to have to step down as alpha?”
“Shut up.” Dtu felt his jaw tick beneath his mask. “It is none of your business.”
“It didn’t seem right to…well, y’know,” Jakob paused to chuckle, “with everything that was going on. With your friend who died and all.”
That killed Kamira’s smile. She sighed and took another gulp from the bottle. “Point taken. Forgive me, old dog. I needed something to cheer my mood.”
“And kicking me always does lift your spirits.” Dtu shook his head, the tension leaving his shoulders. “Forgiven.”
The room went silent for a long time, save for the crackle of the fire. Jakob finally broke the moment after what seemed like minutes. “Kamira?”
“Hm?”
“On Gioll, it’s a tradition to tell stories of the fallen after they are gone. We believe it helps carry them to the Grandfather. I know he wasn’t of Gioll, and neither are you…but maybe remembering him might help ease the pain of his loss, if not ease his passage onward.”
Kamira wiped at her face again, fresh tears having rolled down her cheeks. “Stories of that old curmudgeon?” She smirked. “Here’s one. See, he oversaw a trial between someone from the House of Flames and the House of Shadows. He ruled in favor of the House of Shadows. Now, you see, that just isn’t done. Those sneaky fucks always deserve whatever’s coming to them. So Edu decided to have a little bit of fun at Maverick’s expense. He gathered up a dozen y’orungs—you’d probably think they looked like wild pigs. On the sides of which he painted the numbers one through thirteen. But there were only twelve. He skipped number six. He let them loose inside the library, causing a stampede. Maverick and his people spent weeks looking for number six. And oh, by the Ancients, you should’ve seen him turn red when Edu revealed the joke!”
The room laughed. Kamira smiled and spun the bottle between her fingers as she thought. “But he told me in private how much he had laughed afterward. That’s who he was. Cold on the outside…but anything but, deep down. He appreciated the brilliance of the joke. He would just never, ever let on in public that he had been outplayed. He was the most intelligent man I’ve ever met. Even more important than that, he was compassionate. He loved his wife more than anything in the world. And once she was gone, it was like the Ancients had ripped the heart out of his chest. He was never the same.”
“I wish I had known him…before all that transpired.” Dtu sighed.
“Me, too,” Ini agreed.
“How come you didn’t know him before?”
“We were asleep in our crypts. We can enter a willing fugue state for a time.” Ini gestured a hand in the air as she talked. “It helps stave off the exhaustion and the madness that might come with all the years we’ve lived. Prior to the Great War, where Aon pitched us out of balance by killing Qta, we would all rest from time to time. But after that…many of us couldn’t face the encroaching void that was consuming our world.”
Missing his confusion, Ini continued helpfully. “We were all asleep in our crypts, ready to face the void—save for Aon and Edu, our dear departed King of Flames, when Maverick came to Under. He did not even know Vjo until nearly two hundred years after he arrived.”
“That had to be…difficult.” Jakob was clearly struggling.
“You have no idea. Picture being in charge, and then all of a sudden these old assholes show up.” Kamira grinned as she chugged from the bottle again. “At least I knew Dtu. Maverick was just sitting in his library one day when a giant, thirty-foot, motherfucking spider showed up.”
Jakob shuddered. “I’m afraid of spiders.”
Kamira cackled. “So was Maverick!”
Jakob leaned forward, resting his arms on his knees. “Oh, I want to hear that story.”
Kamira was happy to oblige.
Dtu watched her mood improve with each story she told about her fallen friend. Jakob kept pulling them out of her, prompting her to find another funny or impressive story. With each passing moment, the grief left her eyes, and was replaced with a joyful and peaceful sadness. When the hour grew late, they all decided to get some sleep.
Kamira hugged Jakob, placing a kiss to the young man’s cheek. “Thank you, mortal.”
“Anytime, immortal, terrifying cat-lady.” Jakob smiled at her.
She laughed again and patted Dtu on the shoulder as she passed him to walk up the stairs. “Sleep with him soon, old dog, or I will.”
“I’m sorry, but I don’t—no offense, but I, well, I don’t…really…sleep with ladies.” Jakob rubbed the back of his neck shyly.
“Oh, don’t worry, dear boy. I’m sure I’ve got an attachment or two to fix that. If you’re nervous about my aim, ask Ini.” Kamira laughed at the man’s shocked and blushing expression before she was gone. “Good night,” she called from upstairs.
Dtu shook his head. “She is a bit much. Forgive her.”
“I don’t think…I’ve ever had a woman proposition to fuck me before, that’s all.” Jakob shrugged. “It’s flattering, I suppose?”
Dtu rolled his shoulders, cracking them. “I need to sleep as well. Come, Jakob. It has been a long day.”
“I couldn’t agree more.” Jakob smiled gently at Ini. “Goodnight, Queen Ini.”
“And you, sweet mortal. What you did for her was a true show of kindness. You are a gentle, wonderful soul.” And with that, she disappeared in a blink. Jakob jerked in shock as the woman simply vanished.
Dtu placed his hand on Jakob’s shoulder. “You get used to it.”
“Will I?”
That time, it was his turn to chuckle. He leaned the wooden forehead of his mask against Jakob’s temple. “You will. I promise.”
“If you say so.”
Dtu walked with Jakob up the stairs and watched as the young man stripped down to his underwear and slipped under the sheets. Dtu left his pants on as he joined him, save only for the fact that he did not wear undergarments. It felt inappropriate to bare himself to Jakob in such a way. He had barely placed his head against the pillow—a thing he was still getting used to using—before Jakob was curled up against his chest, resting his head in the crook of his shoulder.
It felt good.
It felt natural.
It felt as though they belonged like that. Dtu wrapped an arm around him and pulled him closer. “She would kill to protect you now. You have made a powerful and lifelong friend in Kamira.”
“All I did was try to cheer her up. I know what it’s like to lose loved ones.” Jakob smiled as he snuggled into him. “But I’ll take all the friends I can get. Especially dangerous, scary, cat-ladies who are offering to fuck me.”
“If she gets to do it before I do, I’ll be quite cross.” He didn’t know where he had the nerve to joke. Or perhaps he was not joking at all.
“Well, that’ll be your fault, not mine.” Jakob grinned playfully then placed a kiss against Dtu’s chest.
It felt like the air had rushed out of his lungs. Jakob might as well have punched him in the gut. Lifting his hand, he stroked the pad of his thumb over Jakob’s cheek. He knew his touch was rough, but the young man didn’t seem to mind. He leaned into Dtu’s palm and shut his eyes.
“I—” Jakob’s words broke off in a yawn. He grunted. “Sorry.”
Dtu chuckled and squeezed him for a moment in a tighter embrace. “Sleep, Jakob. You’re exhausted. Get some rest.”
“Mmhm. I see how it is.” Jakob snuggled back into his shoulder. “Dodge the conversation. I see how it is.”
“Precisely. It’s a skill of mine. Practiced over millennia. Now, shush. Rest.”
Dtu stayed awake until he felt Jakob’s breathing grow slow and steady. Soon, it was clear the man was asleep. Only then did he allow himself to sleep.
You have more than one powerful ally who will kill to keep you safe, dear Jakob.
26
Ember woke up with a groan. She was lying on something soft and warm. Stretching, she felt every muscle in her legs and her back twinge angrily.
A hand stroked up her arm before brushing her hair back. “Good morning, dove.” Rxa. His voice was quiet as he pressed a kiss to her temple.
“Ow.” That was pretty much all she had to say on the matter.
He chuckled and shifted. She felt him on the bed beside her. Rolling onto her back, she rubbed a hand over her face before finally blinking her eyes open. She was naked beneath the sheets. Not like it really mattered anymore. Not after what they’d done.
“Sore, I take it?” He combed his fingers through her hair before settling his hand by her cheek, running his thumb along her skin.
He was wearing his mask. Shattered, yellowed porcelain and empty, cavernous eyes greeted her. A placid and lofty expression that had turned into a dangerous, one-sided grin by a crack that began at the corner of the mouth and cut its way up the cheek.
It didn’t bother her. She had gotten used to it. But why was he wearing it? “I feel like I’ve been run over by an angry herd of cattle.” She stretched again, wincing. Lifting her arm, she noticed slight scratches on her skin. They’d heal in a day; they weren’t anything more than what a cat might give her when they played too hard.
“I’m not surprised. I didn’t exactly go easy on you. I gotta say, though…you took it like a champ. I knew you liked it rough.” He paused. “I have to ask. On a scale of one to ten, how angry are you with me right now?”
“It depends.” She reached her hand under the sheets and inspected, well, the possible damage. She was a little tender, but fine.
“I cleaned you up before tucking you in for the night. It’s rude to ride someone until they black out and then just leave them like that. You’ll be fine.” He kept stroking her cheek tenderly. His voice was soft, even if his words were crass. “I made breakfast. You should get some food in you, and then I’ll draw us a hot bath, and I will massage every muscle in your body. I think I owe you that much.”
“I’m not sure I’m ready for another round, if that’s what you’re insinuating.” She smirked up at him. “I might need a day.”
“I was insinuating no such thing.” He tapped the tip of his finger on her nose before sitting up. “I’m a gentleman, after all.”
“Uh-huh. A total gentleman. Sure.” She stretched and groaned again as her back popped. “By the Grandfather, you don’t mess around.”
“When you tell a girl you’re going to brutalize them into oblivion, you have to follow through. I’m a monster of my word, after all.” He sat on the edge of the bed. He was fully dressed, his once-white, now-faded-yellow cotton shirt tucked back into his black pants. His platinum hair hung around his shoulders and his mask in long, silky tendrils. She wanted to stroke her hand through it.
But something was bothering her. Namely, because something was bothering him. She could tell it from his posture. The way his shoulders were curled
in. How he was distancing himself from her. And his mask.
“Why’re you hiding?”
He looked back to her. “Excuse me?”
“You’re hiding. Why?” She sat up, grunting a little as she did, and shifted to sit against the headboard. She didn’t bother covering her breasts.
“I’m doing no such thing. I’m sitting right here, aren’t I?”
She reached out and poked the porcelain mask of his cheek. “Why are you wearing this thing? I thought you hated it.”
“I don’t. I just figured, that since, well…” He sighed, his shoulders slumping farther. “I’m hiding.”
Moving closer to him, she reached out and carefully, slowly enough that he could stop her, pulled the mask from his face and placed it on the sheets beside her. He looked away, now trying to hide his expression from her.
Placing her fingers on his jawline, she turned him back to her.
What she saw on his beautiful face broke her heart in two and filled it with something she didn’t understand. He looked so vulnerable—so raw and exposed. There was fear, regret, sadness, and…hope. Desperate hope for something as he watched her, yellow eyes flicking between hers as if searching for something in her expression.
But what was he looking for?
Acceptance? Forgiveness?
Placing her palm to his cheek, she leaned in close. Tenderly, slowly, she kissed him.
And then she yelped against his lips as he suddenly collapsed on top of her, knocking her to her back. She wasn’t sure what to expect. Was he changing his mind about a second round? She expected him to begin the dance all over again. But instead, he broke the kiss and…laid his head against her collarbone, his forehead against her neck.
He was holding her like she was a stuffed animal. And he was shaking.
You’re a strange man, Rxa. Or demigod. Or monster. Or whatever you are. She wrapped her arms around him and rubbed a hand up and down his back. “Are you all right?”
“I should be asking you that question. I should be fine.” But it was clear that he wasn’t. “After last night, you should…you should hate me. You should be angry with me. Instead, you…”
Grave of Words (Fall of Under Book 2) Page 23