by Jackie Lau
“He is,” Natalie said, smiling faintly.
She glanced back at her mother, who stood behind the couch. Mom wasn’t looking at the wedding photos. No, she was frowning at the Baffin Island mist walls.
She’s just a little nervous, Natalie told herself. Her baby is getting married. She’s just nervous.
* * *
Connor was sitting in the second pew, next to Seth and Simon. He felt a little strange being so close to the front, given he hardly knew the bride and groom, but Simon had invited Connor to sit with them.
Simon was currently fixing Seth’s tie. “You always do it wrong.”
“I do not,” Seth said. “It’s perfectly serviceable.”
“It’s not supposed to be serviceable. It’s supposed to be impeccable. This is your little sister’s wedding.”
“I wonder if she’ll do a face-plant into the wedding cake.”
Simon smacked his husband’s shoulder, but he was smiling. “Maybe Rebecca will outdo me.”
“How would she manage that?”
The music started, and everyone stopped talking and turned toward the doors at the back.
And that was when Connor saw her.
Natalie was the first to walk down the aisle, and she looked positively stunning. Her hair was curled and partially piled atop her head. Her eyes were wide and bright. Her lips were pink. She was wearing a purple dress and carrying a bouquet of white flowers, moving slowly down the aisle to allow the photographer lots of time to take pictures. And that smile...
Jesus. She was beautiful.
And unlike last night, it wasn’t a fleeting thought.
Somehow it settled in his chest, became a part of him.
His heart pounded faster as she approached the pews at the front of the church. She kept her gaze straight ahead and didn’t look at him. But once she was standing at the front of the church, she caught his eye and winked, and he breathed in sharply.
Get it together, Douglas. It’s just Natalie. You’ve known her for seventeen years.
Kelsey came down the aisle next, followed by Iris. Although they looked nice, they didn’t have anywhere near the same effect on him.
Everyone around him rose. The bride must have entered, but Connor hadn’t noticed because he’d been looking at Natalie. He stood up and turned back.
Rebecca floated into the room on her father’s arm, a big smile on her face. And suddenly he wasn’t thinking of Rebecca or Natalie, but of the day ten years ago when he’d stood at the altar and a woman in a wedding dress had walked down the aisle toward him.
It had been a mistake. He hadn’t understood what he wanted, and he was angry at himself for not figuring that out sooner.
Rebecca approached Elliot, and Connor didn’t feel the need to shout “Don’t do it!” or anything like that. Many marriages worked out fine. He hoped theirs would be one of them.
The music ended, and they all sat down as the minister began.
“We are gathered here today...”
Connor’s gaze slid back to Natalie and stayed there for most of the ceremony.
* * *
Connor waited on the front lawn of the church for Natalie to be done with her duties in the receiving line. Once the last guest had offered their congratulations to the bride and groom, Natalie walked down the stairs toward him, and he put his arm around her and greeted her with a kiss on the cheek.
She stepped back and frowned at him. “What was that for?”
He hadn’t really thought about it; it just seemed like the right thing to do. Though what he really wanted was to kiss her lips and ruin her pink lipstick, but he wouldn’t.
“I’m your date, aren’t I?” he said. “I’m just doing date-ly things.”
She looked at him as though he was a total weirdo, her eyebrows slanting down. Somehow, that was a very Natalie look. A WTF-is-wrong-with-you look.
Strangely, he found it endearing right now.
“I have to stick around for pictures,” she said, “but you’re welcome to leave. Go back to the bed and breakfast, walk along Main Street—”
“Won’t that take about five minutes?”
“Sounds about right. Anyway, you can take off and meet me back at the community center at five o’clock. I don’t mind.”
He leaned in close, brushing a curl behind her ear. “I’m your date and your emotional support. That’s what you want, right? What if a skunk sprays the whole wedding party?”
She put her hands to her face and groaned. “Stop putting wedding disasters in my head.”
“What if you sprain your ankle? What if Rebecca gets into a fight with her new mother-in-law? What if you bend down and the back of your dress splits down the middle?”
Actually, the thought of getting Natalie out of her dress was rather appealing.
“Fine, fine,” she said, rolling her eyes. “If you really want to watch me blink as the photographer takes my picture, be my guest.”
And so he stayed.
Chapter 6
To Natalie, it felt like a miracle.
Nothing had gone wrong when they were getting ready for the wedding this morning, and nothing had gone wrong during the ceremony—the best man hadn’t forgotten the rings, and nobody tripped when walking down the aisle.
Nothing had gone wrong during pictures, either. No skunks, no rain, no wardrobe malfunctions. At one point an off-leash dog had run up to Rebecca, and Natalie had braced herself for trouble. But instead, the wedding photographer just got some very cute pictures of Rebecca, Elliot, and a goldendoodle named Tequila Sunrise, who seemed quite happy to pose for pictures. Her owner turned out to be Rebecca’s kindergarten teacher.
So far, so good.
Which made Natalie worry that something really bad would happen at the reception to make up for their good luck thus far.
She arrived at the community center at exactly five o’clock, Connor by her side. He’d been unusually attentive to her all day, as though he was taking this date business very seriously. He’d even told her she looked beautiful after she and Rebecca had taken a few pictures together, and that had caused an unexpected flicker of pleasure in her chest.
“This is the first time I’ve been to a wedding reception in a community center,” he said as they walked into the reception room.
“I know it’s not very classy.”
“Not what I was going to say. It just gives it a very small-town feel.” He nodded toward the small bar at one end of the room. “What would you like to drink?”
“Red wine, please.”
She looked around the room. There were ten tables, all with white tablecloths, white coverings on the chairs, blue napkins, and pink and white flower arrangements. Near the door, there was a table for gifts, and Iris was getting everyone to sign the guest book.
Natalie had attended many wedding receptions here over the years, including one for Uncle Carey and two for Aunt Louisa.
And now it was Rebecca’s turn.
Natalie hadn’t had much to do with the planning, since Ottawa was a long way from Mosquito Bay, although Rebecca had texted her pictures and asked for her opinion on several occasions.
“Here you go.” Connor returned with her glass of wine. He filled out his gray suit quite nicely, and it looked good with his light blue shirt and dark blue tie.
Just as Natalie was taking her first sip of wine, she heard the click of a camera.
A candid shot. Well, she probably looked lovely in that one.
“Okay, you two,” said the photographer, a middle-aged woman with short hair and the energy of a bumblebee. “Smile!”
Natalie forced a smile for the zillionth time today.
Except...she didn’t have to force it too much. Despite the fear at the back of her mind that something awful would happen, she felt happy, and Connor’s arm around her shoulder was nice, too.
Rebecca arrived a few minutes later. She’d gone back to their parents’ house to change into a red cheongsam. Many of the Chinese wo
men Natalie knew wore a white dress for the ceremony, then a red dress for the ten-course banquet. Rebecca wasn’t having a Chinese banquet, but she did have the dress, which was bright red with gold embroidery and a high neck.
“Beautiful!” Ngin Ngin cried when Rebecca and Elliot approached her. “But flowers...” She clucked her tongue. “Should not have been white.” She shook the bride’s bouquet and then nodded at the flower arrangement on the nearest table. “Bad luck.”
“It’s the color of death.” Dad shrugged. “Just silly superstitions, of course.”
Ngin Ngin gave him a withering glare before walking away.
There was an hour of drinks and appetizers before the buffet dinner in a room full of people who meant something to Rebecca and Elliot. Lots of hugs and congratulations, catching up with people Natalie hadn’t seen in ages. There were many family members whom she only saw every few years, at weddings and funerals.
She thought back to the pictures of her parents’ wedding. None of her grandparents had come, and even though that was almost forty years ago, it wasn’t something that could be forgotten.
Ngin Ngin had apologized profusely for it some time ago, and she’d given Mom and Dad a wedding present a year after her husband’s death. It had become clear that Natalie’s paternal grandfather—whom they’d called Yeh Yeh, the rare times they saw him—had been the one who disapproved the most of Mom and Dad’s marriage, and the one who made all the decisions. Without him, Ngin Ngin seemed happier and more outgoing.
Sad to marry a man you were happier without.
Grandma, on the other hand, had never fully accepted Mom’s choice of husband, and they had a tenuous relationship. She and Grandpa, who’d passed away seven years ago, hadn’t gone to Seth and Simon’s wedding, either.
Family was complicated.
Natalie snagged a bacon-wrapped scallop off a tray as Grandma and Aunt Louisa approached.
“That was a wonderful wedding.” Aunt Louisa swayed slightly, then had a gulp of wine from what was almost certainly not her first, or even second, glass. “And I would know. I got married three times.”
Grandma looked at her disapprovingly. She seemed to particularly enjoy being disapproving, and she was very good at it.
“That’s an interesting dress,” Grandma said to Rebecca. “Is it a kimono?”
“No,” Rebecca said. “A kimono is Japanese.”
“Hmph.” Grandma tapped her cane on the floor before turning to Elliot. “I’m still waiting for my first great-grandchild. I hope you plan on giving me one sometime next year.”
He chuckled. “We’ll see.”
“Natalie is too focused on her career and predicting the end of the world. And Seth—”
“Okay, Grandma,” Natalie interrupted, hoping to prevent any inappropriate remarks about her gay brother. “We get it. You’d like a baby in the family.”
“I’m not getting any younger. I haven’t got all the time in the world.”
“And thank God for that,” Aunt Louisa said, holding up her glass.
Grandma narrowed her eyes at Aunt Louisa before turning to Natalie. “Who’s this you brought with you?”
“His name is Connor,” Natalie said.
“Are you telling me you actually have a boyfriend? Why, it’s a miracle!”
Her jaw tensed, but she would remain polite. She rarely saw these people, and she didn’t want to cause a scene at her sister’s wedding. It wasn’t the time for the snarky response she was tempted to give.
“Actually, he’s just my date.” She managed a smile.
“Pleasure to meet you,” Connor said, extending his hand.
“You should go out with him,” Grandma said. “You’re not getting any younger, either. How old are you—thirty-nine?”
“Thirty-six,” Natalie muttered.
“Rebecca!” Mom bustled toward them. “Do you need anything? Can I get you another drink? A scallop?”
“I’ll take both!” Aunt Louisa said.
Rebecca shook her head. “I’m fine.”
Mom winked at her, then hustled Grandma and Aunt Louisa out of the way, toward some of Natalie’s cousins.
Natalie flopped down on a chair. She was glad that conversation was over, and she needed to rest her aching feet—she wasn’t used to wearing heels. Connor sat down on one side of her, Rebecca on the other. Elliot went off to talk to his aunt and uncle.
“Rebecca, I forgot to ask you,” Natalie said. “Are you going to change your name?”
“I think so. I always thought Chin-Williams was kind of awkward, and I want to have the same last name as my kids.”
Ngin Ngin hobbled over at the mention of “kids,” and Connor offered his chair to her.
“You will have children?” Ngin Ngin said. “Is this what I heard?”
“Rebecca doesn’t need to have children just because she’s married.” Natalie had been so focused on her sister’s wedding that she’d forgotten about the possibility of kids. Perhaps Rebecca was already pregnant, and that was why they’d had such a short engagement.
No. Rebecca would have told her.
Wouldn’t she have?
“We want kids.” Rebecca smiled.
“Good,” Ngin Ngin said. “I will babysit for you. You have to bring the baby to my house. Hard for me to travel, but I will look after him whenever you want.”
Natalie exchanged a look with Rebecca. Ngin Ngin was ninety and had trouble walking. She probably couldn’t pick up a baby...and what if she fell?
“You must have a small baby so I can carry him,” Ngin Ngin continued. “I only got to see you twice when you were a baby. Natalie, only once. But now will be different, yes?”
Rebecca nodded. “It will be easy since we both live in Toronto.”
However, that wasn’t the main reason Ngin Ngin had rarely seen her grandchildren. In fact, when Natalie was a baby, they’d lived in Toronto, too. Had Ngin Ngin still been mad at Dad for marrying a white woman, or was it all because of Yeh Yeh that they rarely saw each other?
That was the thing about weddings. They made you remember all the family drama.
“You can be fun auntie,” Ngin Ngin said, patting Natalie’s hand. “But Connor is a nice boy. Maybe you should consider?”
Apparently, Ngin Ngin and Grandma agreed on something.
“Connor is just a friend,” Natalie said.
Connor put a hand over his heart, as though wounded.
Ngin Ngin laughed as she stumbled to her feet, then turned to Rebecca. “Everyone wants to talk to you because you’re the bride. Cannot...” She paused and frowned, as if trying to think of the word. “Cannot keep you to myself.” She shuffled off.
Rebecca had a sip of her drink. “She speaks English so much better now. Dad says she’s started going to classes at the community center. Well, not English classes, exactly, but there are volunteers to help you practice your English.”
When Natalie was younger, talking to Ngin Ngin had been difficult, and she’d often needed Dad as a translator. But now they could actually carry on a conversation. It was impressive how her grandmother had learned English in her old age.
Iris came over and took the seat that Ngin Ngin had just vacated. Although she was only a year older than Rebecca, they hadn’t played together much when they were children. Iris’s father—Dad’s brother, Lewis—hadn’t gone to Mom and Dad’s wedding, and they hadn’t spoken for five years after that. By the time Rebecca was born, they were having occasional holidays together, although the tension at these family events didn’t exactly inspire Iris and Rebecca to become close.
But then they’d started engineering at the University of Toronto in the same year, Iris having taken a year off to travel. Without their parents around, Iris and Rebecca had realized that they actually got along quite well.
Now Iris pulled a tiny plastic bag out of her clutch. She raised her eyebrows.
“Iris!” Rebecca shrieked. “Put that away.”
“Wouldn’t it be hila
rious if you got high right before your speech? You’d make good use of the buffet, too.”
“You can’t be serious.”
“Of course not.” Iris stuffed the marijuana back into her purse. “Though if you want to do some later...”
“I’ll stick to booze on my wedding night, thank you.”
Natalie had nothing against weed, although she hadn’t indulged in a long time. But now she imagined Iris and Rebecca smoking joints together when they were at university. It wasn’t a big deal, but she couldn’t wrap her mind around it. This was her baby sister!
“I might need it,” Natalie joked. “Find me once the dancing starts. It’ll help me get through seeing Mom and Dad on the dance floor.”
“Aw,” Rebecca said. “It’s cute.”
Their dancing was cringe-worthy, but if Natalie was honest with herself, she did think it was cute that they always made it onto the dance floor together.
Aunt Carolyn came over. “Lovely wedding, Rebecca. You look beautiful today.”
Uncle Lewis nodded solemnly behind her. He rarely spoke, but his wife was a different story. Since Aunt Carolyn was Chinese, Yeh Yeh had approved of the match, although he’d been unhappy they didn’t have any sons.
“Thank you,” Rebecca said. “We’re so glad you could make it.”
“Connor, these are my Uncle Lewis and Aunt Carolyn,” Natalie said. “Iris’s parents.”
They all shook hands.
“So,” Aunt Carolyn said, “are you next, Natalie?”
Oh, dear God. She was getting sick of this.
“I doubt it,” she said.
“You don’t have much time left,” Aunt Carolyn continued. “Your biological clock...tick, tick, tick!” She laughed as though that were funny.
Nobody else laughed.
“Mom, stop it,” Iris pleaded.
Aunt Carolyn didn’t listen. “You don’t want to wait until you’re forty. It’ll be harder then, running around after a little kid.”
Natalie gulped some of her wine. Why did people feel the need to say such things to single women in their thirties? She considered saying she didn’t want children, but in her experience, it wasn’t worth the hassle, and her aunt would probably just think she was a freak. Plus, Aunt Carolyn would ask why not, and Natalie wasn’t in the mood to explain her life choices. Nobody asked you to justify why you wanted kids—why did she have to justify her decision?