by Kaye Dobbie
‘I thought we could take up one whole side of the yard. Derek wants to build a wall around it, as protection from the gales that roar through here when there’s a westerly blowing. Make it into a proper French potager. Herbs and veggies and fruit trees, too, if there’s room. It would give him something to do once the house is finished, and I’m looking after the restaurant and the business side of things full-time.’
It sounded like a fun idea, but I’d have to do some research, and maybe Jason—or Derek—was being slightly too ambitious. Nothing worse than a disappointed client. As for the rest of the yard, it could be a real showpiece—a restored colonial goldfields garden. The customers could dine out here, if Jason wanted to go down that path.
‘What do you think?’ His voice interrupted my thoughts, and I realised I had not spoken for some time while he had continued to ramble on.
‘I think it’s my dream come true,’ I blurted out before I thought better of it.
He chuckled. ‘That’s the exact opposite of what I thought when I first saw it,’ he admitted, pulling a face. ‘I loved the house—still do—but the garden … not my area of expertise, I’m afraid.’
‘But you said your partner would be willing? I’m thinking you may not want anything that requires too much maintenance?’
‘Oh, Derek would be up for anything. Not immediately though, he’s still got the house to do. I’m not sure he isn’t taking on too much, but it’s no use telling him that. When we decided to buy this place and renovate, he started doing courses on carpentry, brick-laying, you name it. The man wants to do this entire project single-handed, but we still have a business in Melbourne and we’ll be dividing our time between the two for a bit longer yet. Then, if things work out here, we’ll sell the Melbourne side of things, and live here permanently. So, to answer your question, if everything goes to plan, then yes, I can see him needing something to keep him occupied. Derek has far too much energy.’
‘Gardens can be a form of relaxation, too,’ I assured him, in case he was imagining this was just more weight on his already overloaded shoulders. ‘Were you planning to have animals? Goats, sheep, pigs?’
The expression of horror on his face was answer enough.
‘A dog, then?’ I said, trying not to laugh.
‘I have a cat,’ he offered. ‘But she’s lived a pampered life indoors.’
It sounded a bit like Lincoln’s cat, I thought, remembering the way the tortoiseshell had blocked our entry to the cottage. And then I told myself I shouldn’t be thinking about Lincoln Nash when I needed to concentrate on my job.
I looked about again and hoped that Jason and Derek would be able to have all of the things they were hoping for. So often in these situations I’d seen people over-extend themselves, and next thing you knew the property was back on the market with some of the gloss taken off it, and at a reduced price.
‘We really love it here.’ Jason stood, staring beyond the weeds to the distant hills and the blue sky. Was he trying to convince himself?
‘It’s amazing what love and hard work can do,’ I said. ‘But what do you need from me? I mean, I can draw some plans for you, or just some ideas on paper. I imagine you have other people to interview before you can make a decision?’
He cocked his head and gave me a look. ‘No, no one else. Just you. I had a look at some of the other jobs you’ve been involved in, and I knew you were the right person for this job. I tend to make snap judgements, Sam, hope that’s okay?’
‘Oh yes … of course.’ I wondered if I looked as amazed as I felt. Didn’t he even want to talk budget? This really was a dream come true.
‘Draw me up some plans, and give me your thoughts on how you see our garden. I want this to be a cooperative thing, so then I’ll sit down with Derek and we’ll have a chat and get back to you. I should warn you though, Derek isn’t like me. He’s a bit of a control freak, and he’ll want to meddle, but I’ll make sure he doesn’t drive you crazy. How does all of that sound, Sam?’
I gave him a lopsided smile. ‘It sounds wonderful.’
By now we’d reached the ute and I opened the door.
‘Things been tough?’ Jason asked me quietly, and I worried that my smile had given away a little too much.
‘I shouldn’t complain. I’m doing okay. But Golden Gully is a small place and if it wasn’t for the green-changers, and people like you, I’d be out of work in no time.’
‘Well, we’re hoping the restaurant will bring in a few more people like us,’ he reassured me. ‘Oh, hang on, forgot!’
He went back inside, leaving me with one foot in the ute. When he returned he had a box with him, which he handed to me with ceremony. ‘Carrot cake,’ he said. ‘Enjoy.’
‘Oh. Thank you!’
That was embarrassing. He must have noticed how I couldn’t keep my hands off it. Still, I wasn’t going to refuse him.
He shook my hand again, his eyes warm, and I found myself liking him much more than I’d ever thought I would like a celebrity chef from Melbourne.
I climbed into the ute and backed out, giving him a wave. I forced myself to contain my emotions until I was out of sight, but once I’d turned the corner, I let fly, thumping the steering wheel and singing out, ‘Yes!’ in a voice that would have sent Mitch running for his life, if he’d been in his usual spot beside me.
What I had said was true, this job really was my dream come true, and I was already starting to visualise the garden as it would look when finished. I tried unsuccessfully to rein myself in, with the reminder that I couldn’t just go at it gung-ho. I would have to consider Jason and Derek, as well as their business.
It had been a long and emotionally charged day, and I thought it was appropriate I buy a bottle of wine and some chocolate to celebrate. I stopped off at the supermarket and found what I wanted. I also decided to add a few treats for my animal friends—it seemed only fair we should all participate in my good fortune.
‘You look nice!’ My friend Suzy manning the checkout sounded surprised, and I broke into a smile. ‘You know what I mean, Sam.’
‘Thanks.’
‘Have you seen Lincoln Nash? You used to be his biggest fan, didn’t you?’ she teased. ‘I expected you to be stalking him.’
‘I wasn’t that big a fan, Suzy.’
‘Oh come on! What was that song you were mad about? It was all you ever played for an entire year.’
I laughed it off, and carried my purchases out to the vehicle. The interior was hot, the afternoon sun barely waning, although it must be getting on for five. Despite what Suzy had said about Lincoln, her flattery had made me feel good. I rarely dressed up around home, so everyone was far more used to seeing me as I’d been this morning at the cottage, in my daggy jeans and dirty boots, with my hair like a bird’s nest.
Maybe I should try dressing up more often.
Just for a moment my thoughts went down a strange and unfamiliar path, as I pictured myself bumping into Lincoln Nash in the hardware store, only this time I was wearing my flowery dress with five-inch stilettos, with my hair shining like a shampoo commercial. And instead of dismissing me, Lincoln would be gazing at me with that stunned mullet sort of expression that men were prone to when confronted by supermodels.
I snorted in disgust at myself and men in general. ‘And that’s going to happen,’ I muttered as I turned into the driveway that led to my gate. ‘Anyway, why are you suddenly so interested in what Lincoln Nash thinks of you?’
Yes, his manner had surprised me this morning, but that didn’t mean he wouldn’t revert to his uncharming self the next time we met. I wasn’t a fan of unpredictable men, the sort who used their moods to manipulate people into doing what they wanted. I’d been there, done that, and it hadn’t made me a happy girl. No, I decided, I much preferred the steady types. Someone you could depend on being there for you, for picking up any pieces that needed picking up without being asked.
Had my father spoiled me for anyone else?
He wasn’t perfect, I knew that, and perhaps because he was my father I was seeing him through slightly rose-tinted glasses, but I thought he was a pretty good role model.
Just then I noticed that the gate was slightly open. Had I closed it properly? But I was sure I had. I was aware that there were people who stole from properties like mine, waiting for the opportunity when the occupants were out, and then taking anything that wasn’t tied down. As awful as that would be, my main concern was always for my animals.
But as I swept my gaze over the yard to the front of the house, I realised someone was sitting on a chair on my verandah. The chair with the wonky leg that I’d been meaning to replace.
All of my high spirits curdled like milk left too long on the hotplate, because there was no mistaking that straight back and expensive ensemble. It was Hope and I knew she’d seen me, so it was too late to turn the ute around and drive off in a cloud of dust.
Time to face the music.
HOPE
14 of January 2000, Willow Tree Bend
Hope heard the motor rumbling down the driveway and looked up as the ute came to a stop beyond the gate. She’d been waiting for over an hour, but it was her own fault. She’d insisted Prue drop her off here at Sam’s place, despite there being no one home. Prue would have been happy to take her back to Melbourne, or to a hotel, but Hope hadn’t wanted that. So, Prue had left her water bottle for Hope, to make sure she didn’t dehydrate, despite the pretty obvious water tap near the steps.
City girls, Hope thought with a touch of amusement, and then wondered when she’d decided she wasn’t one. She’d been a city girl for almost thirty years, hadn’t she? And now, after spending one day back in her old home town, she was a country girl again.
Sam’s kelpie had kept a close watch on her as she’d stepped up onto the verandah, but he hadn’t barked or threatened her. Instead he’d kept her company, sitting by her side with a comically important air. A couple of times he’d trotted off on his own business, only to return to his post a short while later. He’d let her pat his head and stroke his soft velvety ears, and then panted quietly while she stared into the distance, wondering if Sam was coming home at all.
Sam had a real menagerie here. Hope had seen the chooks in the pen, and what might have been a turkey, as well as the horses and donkeys. There might even be wombats and kangaroos hidden away somewhere, she wouldn’t be surprised. Faith had always said that her daughter preferred animals to people, but until now Hope had imagined it was just one of those throwaway lines.
Some of Sam’s chooks—chickens, she corrected herself—appeared to be a bit mangy, and she wondered if they’d been rescued from a battery farm. She could imagine Sam doing that—railing against the cruelty of the animal world, scaling a fence with a chicken under each arm and running off into the night.
The image made Hope chuckle and the kelpie stare.
At least such silliness gave her a respite from brooding about Lena Marshall. Ever since Lena had uttered those words outside the old milk bar, she’d been unable to stop thinking about them. What if Prue had overheard? What would that mean for Looking Back? She could just imagine the voice-over on the promo: Young love, Hope’s first sweetheart … and the rest. She was well aware that they could spin it several ways, and Hope didn’t want them to spin it at all. Because Pete was none of their business and she was going to do everything in her power to keep it that way.
Pete was gone, and if Joe looked exactly like he might have looked if he had reached the same age, and if seeing Joe had filled her with such pain that she could hardly breathe … Well, these were things she was keeping very much to herself …
Pete’s lips on hers, his arms tight around her, and the sudden shift in consciousness, so that she didn’t really know where she was and what was happening outside the magic of this, their kiss. Although he’d taken her by surprise, she wouldn’t have refused him. Pete had a reputation as a flirt, but she knew he was different with her. This was different. Then the tooting of the car horn and Lena grinning out of the window beside her mother’s disapproving face, as they sped past …
The next time he’d kissed her, however, no one had disturbed them, nor the time after that. She’d fallen in love with him. Deeply, irrevocably, completely. First love was sometimes all of those things, and it was a love she still treasured to this day. She certainly wasn’t going to let Looking Back get their grubby paws on it.
The arrival of the ute stopped her thoughts right there.
Even from the verandah she could see Sam sitting in the cabin, staring at her through the window, and she wondered whether her niece was going to turn around and drive off again.
She stood up, so there could be no mistake, and slowly Sam climbed out of her vehicle and went to swing open the gate. Then she drove through and returned to close it securely. That all took time, and Hope didn’t think her niece was in any hurry.
At last the ute was parked and Sam walked towards her, and the kelpie abandoned Hope for his true love, dancing around her niece, wriggling so hard she couldn’t help but smile. Sam knelt down to pat him, cupping his face in her hands so that she could look into his eyes and tell him how clever he was.
That gave Hope plenty of time to take in the pretty dress and the care Sam had taken with her hair and makeup. And to ask herself why in God’s name she hadn’t looked like this earlier? She wanted to shout it out, but she bit her lip. There wasn’t much point in starting an argument. Usually she was able to remain calm in the face of pressure, but since she’d arrived home there was a ripple in that smooth surface, an undertow that constantly threatened to bring her undone.
‘Hello, Samantha,’ she said, when the girl finally reached her.
‘I didn’t realise you’d be dropping by.’ Sam’s gaze went to her suitcase and narrowed. ‘And you didn’t tell me you were staying. Uh, wouldn’t you be happier in a hotel?’
That wasn’t a good start, was it?
‘I didn’t mention it because … well, we didn’t really talk, did we? It was more awkward at the cottage than I’d imagined it was going to be.’
‘That’s one way of putting it,’ Sam muttered.
‘Speaking of awkward.’ Hope looked about her. ‘Where is your grandmother?’
Sam shrugged. ‘Dad must have taken her home. Maybe she needed a rest. Since Mum left … well, she’s been here with me a lot of the time, and as much as I love Gran it was beginning to feel a bit claustrophobic.’
Hope wondered if Lily thought she was keeping an eye on things, and that was why she was staying with Sam. She would have to have that talk with her tomorrow—Lily wouldn’t let her forget about it even if she wanted to—and it wasn’t going to be easy.
She pushed her hair back out of her face, wishing it wasn’t so damn hot. ‘Look, is this really a problem for you, Samantha? If it is you can drive me into town and we can talk on the way.’ Hope made herself smile.
She could see her niece’s mind turning over all of the possibilities, and she waited with a mixture of amusement and irritation to see what Sam might come up with next. Was she really that unpleasant a person? She suspected Sam saw her as the stranger who had sent her mother fleeing and her father into a downward spin, not to mention what she had done to her grandmother.
But surely, they could use these moments together to remedy any misunderstandings and heal any old wounds?
Sam made up her mind and unlocked the door, holding it wide. ‘All right,’ she said, and for a moment they were face to face.
They were much the same height, and they both had Lily’s blonde hair and long legs. Hope’s eyes might be green, whereas Samantha’s were blue, but the resemblance must be pretty obvious. She and Sam were cut from the same cloth, they were Taylor girls, and Taylor girls should stick together.
‘Go ahead,’ Sam invited her. ‘I just have to get some groceries from the ute.’
Hope saw immediately how bare the place was. Almost as if it was still being furnished. A
lso, there was an unlived air to it. She knew Sam wasn’t lazy, far from it, so she assumed this was because her niece was far too busy with other matters.
‘Did you finish filming at the cottage?’ Sam had arrived, carrying the bag of groceries, including a bottle of wine. She set them down on the bench and began busily filling the kettle.
Hope opened her mouth to say something clever about drinking alone and then changed her mind. Best to tread carefully. Just because they shared the same genes did not mean they had the same sense of humour.
Hope dropped her own bag on the floor, keeping an eye on the kelpie, who had followed them inside, in case he decided to make off with it.
‘Yes. They were happy with the cottage scenes. I’ll see them when I get back to Melbourne in a day or so, but that’s it for now.’
Sam looked surprised at her obvious relief. ‘Didn’t you enjoy it? I thought it was what you wanted.’
Hope laughed, a belly laugh rather than the polite laughter that was her stock-in-trade. She surprised herself to hear it, and Sam’s eyes widened, and then she grinned in delight.
‘You sound just like Mum,’ she said. And then her face closed down and she turned away. There was an uncomfortable silence as she set up the mugs. ‘So, you didn’t enjoy it?’ She wanted an answer, evidently.
‘No, I did it for the money,’ Hope replied evenly. ‘I’m broke, and I’m trusting that this will kick my career out of the doldrums.’
Her niece gave her a curious glance, but some of her antagonism seemed to have dissipated, so Hope was encouraged to explain further.
‘It’s a job, Sam, the same as any other. I’m a good actress, and I’m not flattering myself by saying it. I’ve worked hard to become a good actress and I want to stay in work. I figure I’m old enough now to be getting some of those juicy roles that Helen Mirren always seems to land.’