“If there’s a fine, or bail, maybe we can help—” Joy began.
At once Tanner craned around to shake his head, his eyebrows drawing together. “I don’t want you involved. I can handle it.”
The cop with the paunch was emptying Tanner’s pockets, and now he produced a key ring. He tossed it to his partner. “Bring his bike.”
“Can we at least call anyone for you?” William offered. “Your parents, or a girlfriend?”
The idea of him having a girlfriend sent a stab of irrational jealousy through Joy, and she was selfishly relieved when he shook his head. “Thanks just the same,” he said, and then he was being helped or pushed into the back of the patrol car, the cop’s hand on the top of his head.
The man Tanner had called Raven gave them a jaunty wave before getting into the Jag and leading the procession out of the driveway. He gave Joy an uneasy feeling. “What do you think they want him for?” Joy wondered, as the vehicles headed down the hill and out of sight.
William shrugged. “Seems like he was always in trouble for something or other at Ash Grove. It could be anything.”
“Something to do with Melisande, they said.” The thought of him mixed up with the famous blonde beauty made her uneasy. “She’s probably got armies of lawyers. It can’t be good to be in her crosshairs.”
“Maybe it’s some kind of celebrity feud.” William steered her back inside and shut the door. “Either way, it’s nothing to do with us. You in the mood for Doctor Who? That Christmas special made me want to watch the first Weeping Angels episode again.”
“How can you just watch TV?” she demanded. “Aren’t you worried about him?”
William drew a DVD case from the cabinet and extracted the disc he wanted. “It’s not our business. We’re probably better off staying out of it.”
“But it seems like he needs friends more now than ever.”
He flopped down on the sofa and picked up the remote. “But we aren’t his friends. We’re practically strangers.”
“Maybe… but if he came here to see Dad…”
He thumbed buttons in search of the episode he wanted. “Then let’s tell your dad about it when he gets back. But you don’t have to feel responsible for this guy just because it’s your house where the cops nabbed him.”
“It’s not that.” But she couldn’t explain what it was. She just had the strongest feeling that letting him go had been failing him somehow—just as not knowing who he was had been letting him down.
When her parents returned from brunch, they were laughing and smiling at each other like newlyweds. They must have had a lot of that champagne, she thought. But when she took her dad aside to tell him about their visitor, he sobered at once.
“You didn’t know Tanner apart from school, and the billboards?” he demanded.
“No,” she said uncomfortably, thinking of red roses. “Should I have?”
He reached out absently to tousle her hair. “Don’t worry about it, kittycat. I’ll get it straightened out,” he said, but his eyes were troubled, and he turned toward his bookshelves and began to search for something.
“What does it have to do with us?” She was more baffled by the moment. “It sounded like the trouble was between him and Melisande and this Raven guy.”
His hand froze on the spine of a book he had half drawn from its place. “Raven?”
“Yeah. He brought the cops to take Tanner to Melisande, and… Dad, why are you looking like that?” She hadn’t seen him look so pale and sick since his cancer had gone into remission. “You’re scaring me. Let me get Mom.”
“No, honey, wait just a second.” He caught her hand to detain her, searching her eyes. “Was this Raven around thirty, dark-haired, with a very short beard? Expensively dressed, quite pleased with himself?”
She didn’t understand his urgency. “That’s him. Tanner seemed really stunned to see him.”
“I imagine he was.” Subdued now, he released her hand and sank into his desk chair. “Did Raven say what Melisande wanted with Tanner?”
“No, he didn’t. Dad, what’s going on? Please tell me why you’re looking like that.”
“I’m sorry, but I can’t. Not just yet.” His brow furrowed into worry lines, and Joy was shocked at how much he seemed to have aged in the minutes since he arrived back home. Coming in the door with her mom, he’d looked so happy and full of energy. But no longer. Finding her staring at him, he said in a low voice, “I got something wrong—badly wrong—and I’ve got to figure out how to fix it.”
“But what is it?”
With sudden energy he sprang to his feet and began to stuff papers and books into his battered leather satchel. “I’m afraid I have to go to my office to check something. Tell your mother, will you?”
“Okay, but when should I tell her you’ll be back?” And then will you tell me what on earth is going on?
“I don’t know. I very much hope I can get everything back on track by suppertime.” He paused, looking at her again with that searching expression she didn’t understand. “You truly didn’t remember him?”
She flung up her hands. “I don’t know how many more times I can say it. Will you just tell me what I’m supposed to know, already?”
“I’m sorry, kittycat. Don’t worry. I’ll make things right,” he said, bafflingly. He kissed the top of her head in passing, and then he was gone.
Chapter 10
After that she couldn’t settle down to anything. William retreated to the basement with Doctor Who, and she curled up again on the living-room sofa to read through the drama anthology for real—or at least that was what she’d told William and her mom she’d be doing. But when she realized she’d been staring at the same line of dialogue for twenty minutes without seeing it, she gave up and went to her parents’ room. Inside she could hear her mother playing her mountain dulcimer, but the music broke off when she knocked, and Anna called, “Come in.”
Joy opened the door. Her mother was sitting cross-legged on her bed with her dulcimer in her lap and a pencil tucked behind her ear. Blank staff paper was spread out over the bedspread.
“Hey, honeybunch,” she said with a welcoming smile. “What’s up?”
“It can wait. I don’t want to interrupt your composing.”
“Oh, I’m just noodling around.” She set aside the dulcimer and scooped the paper into a stack. “Come have a seat and talk.”
After a brief hesitation she stepped into the room and shut the door behind her. Now that she had the chance to talk things over, she didn’t know how to begin.
“You’ve been so quiet since your dad and I got back,” said Anna. “Did this young man who came to the house—”
“Tanner Lindsey.”
“Yes. Tanner.” Her mother patted the bedspread next to her, and Joy kicked off her shoes and climbed up on the bed to sit next to her, scooching toward the wall so that she could lean back against it. “Did something happen while he was here that made you uncomfortable?”
“Kind of.” Joy rubbed one forefinger over the stitching on the bedspread where it was starting to come loose. Meeting her mother’s concerned gaze was too hard, even though she knew she had nothing to be afraid of. Her mom had never made fun of her, no matter how frivolous the problem Joy brought to her. And she would never, ever deliberately make her feel worse. But Joy had never expected to be in a situation like this. She said, “Did you ever have doubts that you and Dad were supposed to be together?”
Anna had a low, pleasant laugh, almost melodious. “Lord, yes. I was his student, remember. It was insane of me to even think about.”
“But did you ever have doubts because of someone else?”
“Oh, I see. No, not exactly. But that doesn’t mean it isn’t normal—especially with someone as gorgeous as the Sybarite billboard guy.” She reached out to stroke Joy’s hair. “Turn around, baby, and I’ll braid your hair. It’s getting so long.”
Usually Joy didn’t like being treated like a little gir
l, but her mom must have known that it was less awkward to talk about personal stuff when she didn’t have to meet her eyes. She turned around obediently, and Anna began to hum as her hands worked in her hair, gently parting it into sections and weaving it together. It was soothing, and Joy’s anxiety eased slightly.
She recognized the song her mom was humming; it was one of the old songs she used to sing with Joy when she was little. Now that she was older, she was more self-conscious about her voice and its shortcomings, and she didn’t sing much with her mom anymore. She realized that she missed it.
“Maybe his looks did get to me a little,” she said, trying to be completely honest. “But it was more than that. He seemed so devastated when I didn’t recognize him. Even when I realized who he was, it seemed like he kept expecting me to have a different reaction to him. And when he found out William and I are engaged, it really seemed like he thought…”
“Thought what?”
“Like he thought I should be with him.” When her mother didn’t answer right away, Joy said in a low voice, “Not just thought it, but believed it. So much that he didn’t know what to do when it wasn’t true. And then there were the—the daydreams.”
They were more like downloads, the way all that sensory information had come flooding into her mind. But she didn’t want to try to explain that to her mother.
“You mean, you started daydreaming about him?”
She nodded, remembering the feeling—it had been so vivid—of him kissing her, of the tender warmth of his lips and the sweetness of his breath, the way all of her nerve endings tingled where his skin touched hers. She had never felt like that with William. With him, kissing was… well, it was pleasant. It was nice. But it wasn’t that pulse-quickening rush of sensory overload, of breathless eagerness and yearning and—
Joy gave herself a mental shake to dislodge the memories, and her mother said, “Honey, it’s perfectly normal to fantasize about attractive boys. It’s only a problem if it starts to come between you and William.”
“But what if it should come between us?” she pleaded. “What if I’m supposed to be with Tanner instead of William?”
That brought a thoughtful note into Anna’s voice. “You mean, what if this other boy is your destiny?”
Said out loud, it sounded so cheesy and dumb. “I guess,” she mumbled. “He told me he wants me to remember. That made it sound like something already happened between us.”
“He said that?” exclaimed Anna sharply.
Her mother’s urgency startled her. “Is there any way I could have forgotten? Did I ever have a concussion or, I don’t know, a fugue state or something?” Could she have fallen into a coma and forgotten a year of her life? At this point, any explanation was welcome.
“Sometimes people who are meant to be together can get out of synch.” Her mother sounded strangely far away and pensive. “It does happen.”
“Out of synch?” Joy wasn’t sure she was following. “You mean like—like some kind of time travel or something?”
“It’s possible.”
This was the last thing she’d expected to hear. “You actually believe in that stuff?”
“I certainly do—but whether or not that’s what’s happening now isn’t really the important thing. Maybe it’s a gift that this Tanner came into your life right now.” Her mother’s voice was calm and reassuring once again. “It may be wise to stop and think some more about what you want, and who you want.”
“I thought you liked William!”
“Hold still, hon, you’ll pull your hair loose… I do like him, a lot. He’ll have a place in our family as long as he wants it, whether or not you marry him. So don’t worry about that, if that’s troubling you.”
Between the reassurance and the movement of her mother’s hands through her hair, the tension in her shoulders began to ease, and she felt as if she was unclenching. “I just don’t want to be unfair to William,” she said. “It’s so disloyal to even think about being with anyone else.”
“So talk to him.” Her mom secured her hair with an elastic band and took her by the shoulders to turn her gently around to face her. “Tell him why you’re having doubts. As long as you’re not trying to deceive him, you don’t have anything to be ashamed of.”
She shook her head, feeling the heavy braid moving from side to side against her shoulders. “It feels wrong. I made a promise to him.”
“Honey, if you keep the letter of that promise without the spirit, you’re not doing right by either one of you. He deserves better than to be with someone whose heart’s somewhere else.” Joy ducked her head guiltily, and her mother relented. “Try not to worry about it too much, hon. You’ve got time to think things over.”
Joy nodded. That seemed to be the most she could decide right now. As she got up and slid her feet back into her shoes, Anna gave her a reassuring smile. “Don’t let anyone rush you, you hear? Tanner or William.”
“I won’t,” said Joy. At least there was that comfort. She had all the time she needed.
* * *
Maddie woke late on New Year’s Day. Even before she opened her eyes, she could sense something different in the air. Yawning, she stretched her arms wide, and when one hand encountered bare skin her eyes flew open.
Next to her in bed a guy was sleeping, a guy with brown hair, a soul patch, and an all too familiar face. She screamed in shock and outrage, and he winced awake.
“Damn, Maddie, keep it down. I’ve got a hell of a hangover.” He blinked at her as she clambered out of bed and backed away. “What’s wrong with you?”
It was Eric Nash, one of her exes. The most obnoxious, self-centered, and downright douchey of her exes. How in hell had he ended up in her bed? “Wrong with me? What the hell are you doing here? Did you—” She stopped. “Did we—?”
A sleepy grin seemed to confirm her worst fears. “If you forgot already, I can refresh your memory.”
Oh god. This was bad. Worse than bad. Had she been drinking? Could she honestly have gotten so drunk that she’d slept with Eric? “How did you even get in?”
He sat up, the bedclothes falling away to reveal the muscular torso he took so much pride in, and rubbed his face as he yawned. “What are you talking about?”
It was then that she noticed the bedclothes were the wrong color and pattern. This wasn’t her bed. She took a good look around then, and the breath whooshed out of her body, leaving her sick and dizzy.
This was a room she’d never seen before. Not a dorm room, either; through one window she caught sight of a ranch-style house and a patch of asphalt road. The walls were wood paneling hung with a few framed family portraits, instead of being covered with posters of musicians like Eric’s dorm room was or movie posters like her own. The tartan of the bedspread matched the window curtains. She could hear cars passing on the street. This wasn’t Ash Grove.
The back of her neck prickled. “Where are we?” she demanded, but the words came out weaker than she’d meant them to.
“My cousin’s place. Don’t tell me you forgot that too. I know you had a lot of margaritas last night, but I’ve never seen them mess you up like this before.”
“Your cousin’s place?”
“Yeah, in Asheville.” He started to push the bedclothes back, and she turned her back hastily. “What is your deal? You said you wanted to go to his party, and now you’re acting like I kidnapped you.” His voice sounded sulky. She could tell from the sounds behind her that he was getting dressed. “You don’t get to climb all over me like a jungle gym and then pretend I stole your virtue.”
But last night she had stayed alone in her dorm. There hadn’t been any party; she’d gone to bed not long after midnight, after… after making her wish at the statue of Josiah Cavanaugh. Could that have something to do with this?
It didn’t make sense. Her wish hadn’t been about Eric. And that wasn’t the only thing that didn’t make sense. “Why aren’t you in the hospital?” she demanded.
“The hospital? Why would I be?”
He sounded genuinely astonished. She turned around to read his face. Dressed now in jeans and a hoodie, he sat on the foot of the bed to put on his sneakers. “You collapsed at the concert in Franklin,” she said. “You were fronting Monster of the Week, and you ended up in a coma.” She slowed down as she started to put things together. Eric had had Amdusias’s mark on his neck when she first saw him in the hospital. He must have signed on with the demon and then collapsed after Amdusias climbed into his cockpit. But clearly he didn’t know about any of this. He was staring at her as if she’d just grown a second head.
“That’s wack,” he said flatly. “All I can say is stay away from the tequila from here on out, Maddie. Obviously it makes you hallucinate.”
“I guess that’s what it was,” she said, to close the subject. She could figure things out later; right now she had bigger priorities. “Listen, I need to get back to Brasstown. Right away. Can we leave now?”
He looked her up and down, and that familiar smug grin spread across his face. “Fine by me,” he said. “But you may get a little chilly.”
It was only then that she realized she was naked.
She snatched at the bedspread to cover herself and flung a hand out to point at the door. “Out. Now.”
“Jeez, like I haven’t already seen everything. Fine. I’ll be in the car.”
“You won’t leave without me?” she demanded, realizing she’d be in a hole if he abandoned her here.
He stared at her in disbelief. “For god’s sake, Maddie, I’m not gonna just go off and leave you. Why do you always have to make me out to be such an asshole? If you really think I’m such scum, you shouldn’t keep starting things up again. Make up your friggin’ mind already.” He slammed the door behind him, and Maddie paused in the act of retrieving her bra from the floor. He’d sounded huffy, as if his pride was hurt. Or his feelings. But Eric didn’t get his feelings hurt.
Among the Shadows (The Ash Grove Chronicles) Page 12