by Chris T. Kat
“There is no boyfriend,” I squeezed out while I threaded into traffic.
“Oh. So that’s the problem. He doesn’t want to be your boyfriend? Didn’t get him off good enough?”
“Trenkins!” I wheezed. My embarrassment brought a hot flush to my face. I wasn’t even sure if I was embarrassed because of Trenkins’s cheeky remark or because he so boldly talked about me being gay.
“Don’t act all coy. Whatever is going on, get it straightened out.”
“You’re repeating yourself.”
“Just wanted to make myself clear.”
“You did.” After a brief period of silence, I asked curtly, “Are you going to tell anyone about me?”
“No. Why would I?”
I shrugged. “Don’t know.”
“Ever heard of ‘It takes one to know one’?”
I almost missed the red light. We came to a halt with screeching brakes. “Are you serious?”
Trenkins rolled his eyes. “Yes. Get over yourself. Other people have the right to be gay too. By the way, how about we go on first name basis, now that we know each other’s darkest secret?”
Baffled, I heard myself saying, “Okay. I’m Jeff.”
“Parker.”
“How long have you known about me?” I asked when my curiosity got the better of me.
“For two weeks. I was surprised, I have to admit.”
“Why? Not wearing enough pink shirts?”
Parker snorted. “Maybe. Or my gaydar is for shit.”
“You’re not the only one with a shitty gaydar. I’d never have guessed you were gay.”
“Maybe we’re both great at hiding it. So, tell me, buddy, what’s the problem with the boyfriend?”
I glanced at him irritably. “I told you. There is no boyfriend.”
“What about the cute blond thing everyone was lusting after? By the way, I never thought you’d be one with a penchant for the androgynous type. Come to think of it, he looked pretty young too.”
“He’s not my boyfriend. I’ve only seen him once and he’s not my type.” Even I wasn’t convinced by my own words. “Oh, and he is legal.”
“Aha.”
“What do you mean with aha?”
“Maybe your preferences are changing?”
“No!” I pulled a face. “Boys don’t do a thing for me.”
“Except that one.”
Yeah, except that one. There hadn’t been one single night in which I didn’t dream about Alex. Without expression, I said, “It was a fling.”
“Sure, and you’re all sour and mopey because of that.”
“He’s not my type and that’s the end of this discussion.”
“Sometimes an exception can be the right thing. Think about it,” Parker said mildly.
I didn’t want to think about it, so I shot back, “You’re talking from personal experience?”
“All I’m telling you is you might want to consider seeing him again.”
“Wait, how do you know about Alex?”
“Who?”
“The cute blond,” I replied impatiently.
“I happened to be hanging out in the Lion’s Den two weeks ago. Want to try talking to the Greens now and drive over to the school afterward?”
“Subtly changing the topic is not your cup of tea, huh?”
“Nope. You think there’s anything to the whole conspiracy theory? Maybe the Andersons just rubbed someone the wrong way. Maybe them oozing happiness and love makes them a convenient target,” he teased.
“Oh, shut up.”
Parker chuckled. I did my best to squash my desire to find someone I could ooze happiness and love with. Since when did I wish for that? And why the hell did Alex’s face pop up in my mind every time I allowed myself to think about really loving someone?
I shook my head, took a deep breath, and accelerated.
Chapter 5
AFTER a tearful, though not very informative, talk with the Greens, I glanced at my watch and sighed. “You want to grab something to eat before we head over to the school?”
“Will they even be open at this hour?”
I shrugged. “Don’t know. Let’s try it out.”
We drove to the school, where we found they closed early on Fridays. Frustrated, we walked back to the car. Parker pulled out a cigarette and lit it. After the first deep drag, he asked, “You want to get the headmaster’s private address and talk to him there?”
“Do we have another option?”
“I guess not. Let’s stop at the White House first. I’m starving.”
Parker was always starving. I didn’t mind stopping, as I was hungry too. We ordered fries and cheese steak subs and, afterward, large cups of coffee. Parker patted his belly as he relaxed against the back of the booth.
“Don’t you think you’re enjoying the good life a bit too much?” I asked.
“Hey, don’t take away one of my few enjoyments. It’s not as if I have to be in shape to keep my hot young lover.”
I let out an exasperated groan. “There is no lover. You might have a better chance at finding someone without that paunch.”
“You’re so superficial. Whoever gets to be my lover has to look for my inner qualities.”
“You have some?”
“I’m sure there has to be at least one quality. I’m still searching for it.”
I shook my head and tried to hide my grin behind my hand. I beckoned the waitress over for the bill. After paying at the register we went outside to our car. There, Parker made himself comfortable and said, “You think that girl is in real danger?”
“Amaris? I don’t know. I have an uneasy feeling about all of this.”
“Yeah, me too. I doubt the headmaster and the parents will be happy to have us snooping around, especially on the weekend.”
I couldn’t care less. If someone was walking around, attempting to kill innocent people, a small interruption of weekend plans wasn’t such a big price to pay, was it? “We’re off duty tomorrow anyway. We’ll see what information we can gather together today and start fresh on Sunday.”
Parker nodded. “Do you have any plans for tonight?”
“Why? You coming on to me?”
He rolled his eyes. “No, don’t worry. Just thought you might want some company at the Lion’s Den while you wait for your boy.”
“Parker, you’re annoying the crap out of me.”
“Just trying to be helpful here, man.”
“You’re not.”
“Then you won’t mind if I make a pass at him?”
I blinked against a red veil in front of my eyes. Anger and jealousy surged through me so fast it made me gasp. “He won’t take you up on your offer.”
“You sure? He could be desperate.”
No way. “A guy like him doesn’t get desperate.”
“I’ll just have to give it a shot, then.”
“No!” I hollered. An uncomfortable silence followed my outburst. After clearing my throat, I mumbled, “Sorry.”
“Maybe it would be a good idea for you to see him again.” Parker held up his hands placatingly. “Come on, Jeff! That was quite the reaction to my teasing. Just saying.”
I gave a noncommittal grunt and shifted my gaze to the road in front of me. It had been a one-night stand. No more, no less.
I only had to try a million times harder to convince myself.
AT THE station we organized some notes, found out the headmaster’s address and phone number, and attempted to call him. His answering machine informed us he wasn’t there but we could leave a message. Parker left his cell phone number and mine.
“Well, what are we going to do now? There’s no lead, we don’t even know if it’s a real case, and the one guy who could give us addresses and phone numbers is unreachable.”
“How about we call it a day?”
Parker looked at me as if I’d grown a second head. “What’s with you? You’re the workaholic around here.”
“Even a workaho
lic needs a break from time to time.”
“Aha.”
Such an ominous sound. Frowning, I asked, “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Nothing.”
“Right. Forget it, I don’t want to know.”
“In that case, I’ll tell you. You’re going to look for your lover.”
“Keep quiet,” I hissed. “I mean it. This is none of your business so keep your mouth shut.”
“Whoa. Chill, Woods, will ya?”
“Oh, we’re back to a last name basis already?”
Parker got up grumbling. “Have a good night, Jeff. However you’re going to spend it.”
I felt bad. Almost. Then I remembered how much I hated other people snooping around in my personal life.
After polishing up a report, I powered down the computer, stretched my back, and got my jacket. The ride home was as uneventful as ever and the air inside my apartment smelled stale. I lived on Sunset Avenue, close to Sunset Park, which was nice. I liked the neighborhood, but today the apartment didn’t hold any warmth for me.
My mailbox contained a bill, brochures, and a catalog. I threw everything on the kitchen table and slumped down on one of the two wobbly chairs. For a while, I sat there rigid and stared into empty space. This wasn’t how I had imagined my life would be ten years ago.
I had wanted to make a difference, had wanted to help people and society by becoming a cop. I wasn’t completely adverse to a serious relationship, though I didn’t mind the lack of it. I got my rocks off whenever I wanted. Or at least when the job offered me enough time to spend a few days in New York, partying through the clubs. Hunting for one-night stands became less and less intoxicating until I gave up on it. Mostly.
The last few months had shown me that my life lacked in a certain area. I was tired of coming home to an empty apartment, the TV, and having only myself for company. I still had a few friends left, but most of them had entered the settling-down stage with their significant other. I was the odd man out.
Deciding to end my heartfelt contemplations, I crumpled the brochures in my hand and threw them in the trash. I popped a frozen meal in the microwave and gloomily waited for the ping. The meal consisted of potatoes, a lot of cream, broccoli, and sliced chicken. It would have tasted way better had I prepared it myself. I was a decent cook. I just didn’t indulge in it very often. While I cleaned my plate, glass, and silverware, I vowed to myself to change this fact. At least sometimes. Making resolutions was good for the soul, right?
I wandered from my kitchenette to my sofa in the living room where I flipped through the TV guide. Nothing caught my interest. I got up again, strolled over to my bookshelves, but nothing caught my interest there either. The newest books were almost one year old. Geez! What had I done in my free time during the last year?
I scowled at nothing in particular, only impressed with the urgent thought that something had to give.
A structured, small-stepped plan formed in my mind. Step one: Take a shower, dress in fresh clothes.
When I had accomplished this step, the next one became obvious: Do the laundry. I sorted through my dirty clothes and loaded the machine. While I waited for it to finish, I zeroed in on step three. Take the garbage out, air the rooms, change the linen.
Maybe I suffered from a nasty bug of spring-cleaning?
I stuffed my clothes in the dryer and inspected my apartment. It would have to do, as the spring-cleaning bug had already left me.
Step four: Get out; maybe buy a new book or DVD.
I grabbed my keys and headed outside.
Chapter 6
WITHOUT a clear aim in mind, I ambled out the door and drove around. I ended up in the parking garage of one of the casinos. I took the elevator down and walked along the Boardwalk. The crisp, clean air helped me to feel alive and lift my spirits.
I strolled along the Boardwalk for an hour or so, sometimes passing a casino. For a fleeting moment, I was tempted to go inside and try my luck, but irritatingly, gambling had never held my interest.
Chilled to the bones, I watched my breath form little puffs in the air and stuffed my hands in my jacket pockets, hoping to thaw them. For a while I stared at the Atlantic Ocean and listened to the rolling of the waves. The sight and the sounds soothed my tightly wound up mind. I discovered a white boat in the distance, glittering in the setting sun. I wished I could be there.
I expelled a breath. My good mood had evaporated, so I thought that I had better get going. The prospect of getting back to my apartment with no new distraction at hand elicited a grimace. Maybe I should stop by for a drink somewhere?
To my own astonishment, half an hour later, I found myself back in Snake Alley, right in front of the entrance of the Lion’s Den. My subconscious had obviously decided a quickie would be a good idea. It might be right. Me being here had nothing to do with wanting to see a certain someone again. Absolutely not.
I ambled over to the bar but stopped halfway. Shaking my head, I tried to clear it of the vision in front me. This couldn’t be real. I closed my eyes but the sudden warmth after being outside for too long had me swaying on the spot. Someone gripped my elbow, steadying me and asked, “Are you all right?”
I opened my eyes. “Yes. Sure, thanks.”
The man looked doubtful, so I forced a smile and walked on. I reached my destination within seconds. “What the hell are you doing?”
Two heads swiveled around to face me. Alex’s eyes widened whereas Parker merely raised an eyebrow after the initial shock wore off. He had his arm around Alex’s waist. Blood pounded so fast in my ears, I wasn’t entirely sure if it was going to spill outside.
“Hey,” Alex said. “How are you doing?”
“Fine. Never been better.”
“Really? Does he always look like a berserker on a roll when he’s fine?” He turned to Parker. I turned to Parker too because I was confused. It must have been written all over my face.
Parker laughed. “No, not usually, although he seems to be from the possessive faction.”
Alex pulled a face before he snuggled up against Parker’s side. My hands itched.
“I don’t do possessive guys.” Alex batted his eyelashes at me.
Caught by surprise, I said, “Well, I’m not one of those.”
Alex’s eyes sparkled. They goddamn sparkled! “Isn’t that good to know.”
My teeth hurt from gnashing them together really hard. I could barely breathe. This had to be a dream—no, a nightmare. One that I could do without. I kept on staring at the two men in front of me, but no words came out.
Parker rolled his eyes. “Come on, boy, do your duty. I don’t think he’s getting the joke.”
The joke? What joke? What the hell was going on? I had no clue.
I clenched my hands into fists when Parker gave Alex’s behind a friendly pat. I swallowed hard and stood completely rigid. Parker glanced at me, which he followed with an exasperated sigh. He pushed Alex forward with a quiet, “Go on. He’s harmless.”
“Are you sure? He doesn’t look harmless. He looks downright dangerous.”
Parker flapped his hands dismissively. “That’s only for show.”
Alex extricated himself from Parker’s embrace and sauntered over to me. Tentatively, he reached out his hands, smoothed the wrinkles at the front of my shirt, and eventually fastened his hands atop my belt. Dumbfounded, I stared at his hands; slender hands with long fingers, which had felt so incredibly good on my skin the last time we had been together.
“I heard you’ve been giving your coworker here a hard time since you saw me last time?”
I broke out in a sweat. My cheeks felt hot and I didn’t know if I wanted to throttle Alex or Parker.
I managed to choke out, “Arrogant little prick.”
Alex laughed, slipped his arms around my waist, and kissed me soundly on my right cheek. “It becomes more and more endearing each time I hear you say it.”
“You haven’t heard it that often.”
&nb
sp; “We could change that.”
We could. We really could. I swallowed. “We agreed on no strings attached.”
“Agreements can be adjusted, and it doesn’t have to evolve into anything serious. We’re here to have fun, right? You’re a good lay, and a repetition of last time won’t hurt either of us.”
“You’re quite the self-assured guy, aren’t you?” I replied dryly. I locked one arm around his shoulder while I kneaded the enticing flesh of his ass with my other hand.
“I’m quite the catch, yep.”
His arrogance should have been irritating, annoying, and repellent. It was, but it didn’t faze me much. The grin on his face and the subtle grinding motions against my hip distracted me from getting annoyed. “You’re a blabbermouth, that’s what you are.”
“Oh dear, I’m hurt.”
The exaggeratedly coy fluttering of his eyelashes undid me. Laughter bubbled up inside me and I let it out at once. Alex’s grin grew into a face-splitting one before he tipped his head sideways. With closed eyes he searched for my mouth. When he found it, he pressed his lips against mine, gentle, almost uncertainly at first. I kissed back and all uncertainty fled him. His tongue traced the seam of my lips, causing a sudden fluttering feeling deep inside my gut. Nerves, I told myself.
Alex stopped the kiss with a shuddering intake of breath. “Fuck, you’re good at that.”
“I’m good at that fucking business as well.”
“I’m not totally convinced of that.”
I growled. I did, honestly—I did growl. What was it with this infuriating, arrogant little prick that got me riled up so easily? “I’d be happy to enlighten you.”
“I’d be happy to become enlightened as well.”
“Wipe that innocent look off your face. Before I enlighten you, you’ve got to answer one question.”
“Shoot.”
“What were you doing with Parker?” I emphasized my disapproval by firmly squeezing his ass. On instinct, he tried to scoot away from the slight pain, which only brought his pelvis closer to mine. A deep, throaty moan trembled over his lips.
Alex pressed his forehead against mine before he answered, “Waiting for you.”