by Chris T. Kat
“Of course I’m worried about Sean hitting his head! I’m worried all the time about almost everything he does, but he needs to be allowed to move around. Also, the carpet here is very thick and he usually senses when his strength leaves him. He lies down if that’s the case.”
Alex took a deep breath and carded his fingers through his hair in a nervous gesture. His hair looked ruffled and accentuated his boyish features. How old was he? Certainly not old enough to be burdened with raising a disabled child, especially not on his own. A disabled child that somehow appeared more like a small boy intent on watching TV, just like any other boy, only that his method of locomotion was different. Was that pity I felt? And why the hell did I have the urge to wrap my arms around Alex and tell him everything would be okay? I needed to get away, pronto.
“How about you go back to the kitchen? We can talk there undisturbed. I’ll just make sure Sean sits safely.”
His icy look left no doubt the last jab was directed at me. I sighed before I followed Parker into the kitchen. We heard Alex talk quietly to Sean until the opening music of Sesame Street played. I was staring out of the kitchen window when Parker nudged me and whispered, “Get your act together. Especially if you still want to have a chance with the boy.”
“I don’t have a chance with him, nor do I want one. Now drop the subject. Are we clear on that?”
Parker shook his head. What he denied with that gesture, I had no clue.
I chose to ignore his muttered, “You’re such a fool.”
It was too close to how I felt.
Alex came into the kitchen, propped the door open, and motioned for us to sit down. “So, what’s the important police investigation that brought you here? I didn’t even know you two were really detectives. I thought saying you were a cop meant you walked a beat or guarded something. Isn’t it hard to be gay in such a macho community, by the way? Oh wait, they probably don’t know about you two.”
He smiled sweetly at us, though the threat was in the open. I swallowed against a big lump of anger in my throat. “Never, and I mean never, threaten a police officer, Alexander.”
He blushed in embarrassment but defiantly maintained eye contact, clearly challenging me. I didn’t rise to the bait. His voice lingered on the croaky side when he asked mockingly, “Why? You’re going to arrest me otherwise?”
“Boy! Uh, Alex, stop it! Woods might act like an ass but he’s right about this. Don’t threaten us.” Parker drew in a sharp breath before he continued, “Now, the reason we’re here. A parent of a child who attends the same school as Sean received death threats. We’re not sure if the child is really in danger, but there seem to be a lot of accidents going on at St. Christopherus School. Sean was involved in an accident a month ago, that’s why we got your names.”
Alex frowned. “But it was just an accident. Somehow the brakes on his wheelchair loosened and he rolled down a small hill in the schoolyard. He wasn’t severely hurt, only a few bruises and a big scare. At least that was what I was told.” Alarmed, he anxiously shifted his gaze from Parker to me. More forcefully, he added, “It was an accident. No one would think about harming the children there, right?”
“We sure hope it’s a false alarm, but we have to be cautious. Did you receive any threats or weird calls?”
“No!” Agitated, Alex paced in the kitchen.
His gaze flickered from me to Parker but never lingered for too long. He wrapped his arms around his upper body and dropped his chin to his chest while he kept pacing up and down in the kitchen. He couldn’t walk more than four strides before he had to turn around. The tension in the air grew more and more while we watched Alex pace. Parker caught my eye and I nodded. Alex was holding something back.
Parker refused to go over to Alex, so I had no other choice but to step into his way. He started and tried to step aside, but I laid my hands on his shoulders to keep him there. His Adam’s apple bobbed up and down while he struggled with himself. Encouragingly, I said, “There was something, right? You went off like a bomb when we asked if you received any threats to Sean’s life.”
“That was because—”
I cut him off. “It was not only because Sean shouldn’t listen to it. There’s more to it. Come on, Alex, we need to know. We’re here to help. We’re the good guys.”
“You’re not!” he shouted.
A hard shove against my chest sent me stumbling backward. Parker was on his feet in an instant, but Alex didn’t move. He stood in the middle of the kitchen, panting and pressing the heels of his hands against his eyes. Neither of us said a word for a whole minute. Alex was the first to talk again, this time in a much more subdued voice. “I’m sorry.”
I shrugged. “Would you rather talk to Parker alone? I can wait outside.”
“No. It’s just… it’s not important. I shouldn’t… never mind.”
Another silence, this time awkward, settled between us. The cheerful voices from the Sesame Street show floated to us. Count von Count counted something and Sean chattered along. Quietly, Alex stated, “Sean loves counting, even though he always counts wrong if it goes above five. He does know a lot of letters already. He’s even able to read a few words. Why would anyone want to harm him?”
This time I had no doubt that he was hiding something. His eyes brimmed with tears. His lower lip trembled and he hastily turned around to wipe his eyes. My hands itched with the strong urge to pull Alex into my arms, rub my hands over his shoulders and back, and maybe even massage his scalp for a while. It was a troubling thought, since I wasn’t really comfortable with comforting anyone.
“Alex, you have to tell us,” Parker urged.
Alex stood rigidly in front of the sink and stared out of the window. Slowly, he began, “Sean and I moved to Atlantic City three months ago. I got a better paying job here. It’s not what I wanted to do, but… you know, it’s one that makes it possible for me to work part-time. I work as a porter at the Amtrak Station. That way, I’m always here when Sean comes home from school. Two months ago there was a letter in the mail. It said we should’ve never come here; Atlantic City didn’t need to be burdened with another freak of nature. It didn’t need to be filled with… with another worthless human being. If I wanted to keep Sean alive I should take him and go away. It was just this one letter, though.”
“And you never thought of going to the police with it?”
Alex turned around, a pleading expression on his face. “It freaked me out, but it was just that once. Everything else is good here. Sean loves the school and the teachers, I don’t have to worry if I make it home in time from work or not, and I didn’t want the authorities to be involved in our lives again.”
“Why’s that?” Parker asked.
Alex barked a humorless laugh. “How old do you think I am?”
“What’s that got to do with anything?”
“Humor me.”
“Twenty,” I threw in.
“I’m twenty-three. Sean is six, almost seven. My parents died three months before my eighteenth birthday. Even though they made it clear in their will that I was supposed to take care of Sean, it was a big fight keeping him out of foster care. The special kindergarten cost a lot of money and I had to work two, sometimes three jobs. There was always the threat of the authorities taking Sean away from me. Sean didn’t like it at his old school and I, uh, wanted to get rid of some people, so I looked around for another job. The move also helped us get off the welfare radar. I didn’t want them to get alarmed here. I don’t want to give them a reason to believe I can’t take care of Sean. I can’t afford to lose him. I just can’t.”
Chapter 11
WHAT would be a tactful reply to Alex’s outburst? I had no idea. “Do you still have the letter?”
The movement was only minimal, just a sudden tip-tap of his fingers, but enough for Parker and me to know he lied when he said, “No.”
“Are you sure?” Parker intervened. “It would be very helpful. Maybe there are fingerprints on it.
Our forensic team is really good at finding prints.”
“I’m sure. I threw it away.” Alex informed us in a polite voice.
“Damn it, Alex!” I yelled.
Alex jumped and gasped. He obviously didn’t expect me to become loud. He wouldn’t have been so surprised if we really knew each other. As it was, we didn’t know more than each other’s names and how well we fit together in the physical sense. Under normal circumstances, that would be enough for me.
“All of us know you’re lying. Go and get the letter.”
Alex shook his head stubbornly. His control over his voice slipped. “I don’t have it anymore!”
I took a step toward him. Immediately, he stepped back. His complexion turned a chalky white. Inappropriately, I thought how much his pallor accentuated the darkness of his eyes. Parker stepped between Alex and me and glowered in my direction. “Cut it out, Jeff. The boy is scared.”
Alex didn’t deny this statement. However, he tilted his head sideways, obviously listening to something. Parker and I kept quiet. Seconds later we heard a strange, abrading noise. I positioned my hand on my gun and Parker did the same. Alex stared at us while we listened to this strange sound. Abruptly, he bolted toward the door and pulled it completely open. Neither Parker nor I had seen this coming. Parker, at least, was quick enough to grab Alex by the scruff of his neck and pull him back. A strangled cry escaped Alex’s mouth. “No! Let go of me! It’s just Sean. He’s crawling toward us.”
“What?”
Alex struggled against the hold Parker had on him. I positioned myself between Alex and the door, gun at the ready. Carefully, I peered around the corner. Alex squeaked in panic, kicked Parker, and rushed past me.
Parker cursed while I followed on Alex’s heels. That Alex could flee from two established detectives within the confines of a tiny room could only be described as humiliating.
Halfway down the hall he crouched on the floor next to Sean’s exhausted form. Discreetly, I holstered my gun. Alex threw me a grateful glance over his shoulders as he talked to his brother. At least I hoped to have seen gratitude. Parker limped over to us with a big scowl plastered on his face, muttering, “That was completely irresponsible behavior, boy.”
“Why? I knew it was Sean. It just took me a second to recognize the sound because you made me nervous,” Alex bit back.
His motto: the best defense is to attack. I gnawed on my inner cheek to prevent myself from smiling. Despite everything, I really liked him. Too bad he came with an appendix.
Sean twittered something, his face showing signs of distress. Alex replied, “You don’t have to worry, baby. The detective and I just didn’t agree on something, that’s why he yelled. He wouldn’t hurt me.”
Hurt him? Baffled, I looked from Alex and Sean to Parker, who merely shrugged and asked, “Could you take him back to the living room so we can finish this interrogation? I have plans for the evening.”
“I think we’re finished. I’ve nothing more to tell you,” Alex said tightly.
“You don’t tell us when we’re finished. We will go as soon as we get the letter from you,” I hissed.
Alex pulled Sean into his arms and laboriously got to his feet. How often did he have to carry Sean around every day? How did that affect his own health? Alex interrupted me in my musings by saying, “You really don’t like anyone else being in charge, huh?”
Parker flapped his hands in the air. “Too much information, boy, way too much information.”
“Sorry,” Alex replied.
The apology didn’t convince anyone as he smiled. My own lips curled upwards in response to one of those goddamn dazzling smiles. I repeated, “Get the letter.”
The smile vanished and he opened his mouth. A second later he clicked it shut and nodded. I beckoned Parker back into the kitchen where we would wait for Alex. Parker still limped slightly. “He got you good.”
“No shit, Sherlock. I’m tempted to cuff his ear,” Parker growled. “How did you know he’s lying?”
“I didn’t, it was just a gut feeling. Didn’t you feel the same?”
“Yeah, but I was ready to believe him.”
“Sucker.”
“Uh-huh, hello, kettle.”
I grimaced and crossed my arms above my chest. “I’m not.”
Parker rolled his eyes as he sat down on a chair. He was still rubbing his thigh when Alex entered the kitchen without Sean, whom he’d obviously settled in the living room in front of the TV again. Alex clutched a piece of paper tightly in his hand while he offered Parker, “I could give you an ice bag?”
“It’s not that bad.”
I deadpanned, “You sure look to be in dire need of a doctor or a nurse.”
Parker’s eyes danced in mischief when he said innocently, “Oh, you’re into role play? Kinky. Should have told me before I hooked up with that stud.”
Alex glanced from Parker to me, bewilderment clearly written all over his face. I nodded at the letter in his hand. “Unfold it and lay it on the table so we can have a look at it.”
Alex made no move to follow my instructions. Instead, he clutched the letter even tighter. His eyes were impossibly wide and full of emotions while his face remained impassive. I always thought the phrase “eyes are the doors to our souls” was utter bullshit. I revised my opinion. Alex exemplified the phrase; his eyes definitely fit the bill. Did he know how much his eyes gave away? There was so much hurt and fear in them, so much of it.
When it became obvious he didn’t intend to move any time soon, I closed the distance between us. This time he didn’t back off. He dropped his chin to his chest, though. With a gentleness that was foreign to me, I rested my hand on top of the hand clutching the letter and guided it to the table. Alex’s hand felt cold and unsteady. Standing behind him in such close proximity caused my body to react strongly. It was also rather inappropriate in the circumstances. I cleared my throat. “Let me guess. There’s a threat in this letter. You’re not supposed to go to the police, otherwise you’ll regret it?”
Alex threw the letter on the table before he stumbled a few steps backwards. “Yes.”
Taking a handkerchief from my pocket, I unfolded the letter and read it. Basically, it said what Alex had told us. What he hadn’t mentioned was the threat to Sean’s life should Alex decide to go to the police, or the letter’s get-out-of-town ultimatum. They were supposed to live somewhere else by the 12th of April if he wanted Sean to stay alive.
Parker’s eyebrows rose upwards. Slowly, he turned around to look at Alex who had tucked his hands under his armpits. We could still see how much his hands trembled.
“Did it ever occur to you this might be serious? A really serious threat to Sean’s life? And just because you’re afraid of youth services, you’re jeopardizing your brother’s life?”
I hadn’t thought it possible for Alex to grow paler, yet his pallor changed to a ghostly white. He swallowed convulsively a few times and I thought he’d win against the rising nausea. He proved me wrong by whirling around and emptying his stomach in the kitchen sink. Parker’s eyes showed compassion when he got up, though his voice sounded strictly professional. “We have to take this seriously, Jeff. It’s too much of a coincidence. I’ll take the letter to forensics. You’re gonna stay here overnight?”
Alex’s head whipped up. His eyes streamed as he stared from Parker to me. Hoarsely, he stated, “You don’t have to. We’re okay. I’ll lock the door and—”
“Parker is right. You shouldn’t be without protection.” I couldn’t prevent myself from saying, “You should have gone to the police weeks ago.”
“I got that much now, thank you.”
It probably should have sounded snarky, scathing. It didn’t. It sounded helpless, defeated, and very close to tears.
“Do you have any plastic bags here? For the letter?” Parker asked.
Alex pointed to a cupboard to his left while he fought against another wave of nausea. My feet carried me to his side of their own vo
lition. I opened the tap at the sink and rinsed it. The odor was strong, causing my stomach to churn in sympathy. Alex looked positively green around the gills. With a sigh, I rested my hands on top of his tensed-up shoulders and began to knead the knots out. Alex’s first reaction was to become rigid. Soon his shoulders sagged and he relaxed, though he didn’t acknowledge my ministrations.
Parker finished wrapping the letter in plastic and bade his goodbye. “I’ll see who’s available to keep an eye on him tomorrow. See ya!”
“I don’t need a babysitter!”
That’s what they all say. Patiently, I patted Alex’s back and told him, “You should brush your teeth.”
Alex stepped aside in what should have been a brisk movement. He swayed, which screwed up his performance. “Thanks for the advice.”
“You’re welcome. I’ll sit with your brother till you’re finished.”
Alex’s voice stopped me at the threshold of the kitchen door. “Do you really believe this is serious?”
“Yes.”
“I didn’t think it’s serious. I mean, it’s scary and I’m, uh, way more jumpy than usual but… you can’t let such stuff get to you, right? Those people would win then. They win anyhow because they make you feel unsafe and suspicious.”
I noted the detached voice he used, how he changed from “I” to “you”, distancing himself from the threat. “That’s why we have to find out who wrote the letter, so whoever it is can’t harass you anymore.”
Alex laughed harshly. “I’ve seen enough TV to know that you probably won’t find out who wrote the letter. You could do us a favor and go home now. Neither of us feels comfortable with the other one around and Sean’s harasser won’t act before the twelfth.”
“This isn’t up for discussion. I’ll stay. Deal with it.”
“You can’t—”