by Vivian Arend
“No problem.” Travis managed to put his smirk into two words.
Stick to the basics. Cassidy ignored the desire to smack Travis a good one, instead smiling at Ashley who seemed to be excited about living in the bush for a while. “The ladies’ shower house isn’t working yet, but there’s not a lot of people around. Until it’s ready, we’ll make up a warning sign to hang on the men’s door when you or the other women need to clean up.”
“Thanks.” Ashley tucked a strand of hair behind one ear a moment before Travis captured her fingers and pulled her with him up the path. “I’ll talk to you later about the pictures,” she called over her shoulder.
“Deal.”
Cassidy couldn’t help it. He watched them. Ashley glanced back once and gave him a smile that warmed him far more than he had a right, not when she was with another guy.
Not when she was with Travis.
The bastard never looked back. Cassidy felt like kicking his own ass for giving a damn.
Chapter Six
Travis opened the door then followed her into the tiny cabin. His head full of memories, he was far more focused on the shock of discovering Cassidy than the actual living space.
Ashley dropped onto the teeny single-person bed, the springs squeaking ominously. “You sure you want me in here with you? I might have more room in my van.”
Other than the bed, there was also a dresser and a small desk with a chair. A row of hooks along one wall, a towel rack under the window. “It won’t be tough to keep the place clean.”
He stared out the window, catching a glimpse of Cassidy heading in the opposite direction. What a mixed-up, fucked-up situation.
When he turned back, Ashley had ditched her sandals and wiggled onto the bed. She leaned on the wall and was observing him with an all-too-knowing look.
Fuck. “What?”
She raised a brow. “Snapping at me already. That’s interesting.”
“I didn’t snap—” Her brow went even higher, and Travis gave up. “Don’t pull that goddamn Vulcan face on me. Yes, I snapped. No, it’s nothing bad. And you’re sleeping in my bed, not your van, got it?”
A smile played about her lips as she wrapped her arms around her knees. “Cassidy’s hot.”
“For fuck’s sake.” She was merciless. Travis grabbed the chair from by the desk and hauled it around so he could collapse onto it. “Start the damn questions because I know you’re about to burst over there.”
She grinned. “All your secrets belong to meeee.”
Almost true. “Cassidy and I met a couple years ago. He was working in the Rocky area, and we fell into doing stuff together. I thought he was about my best friend. Then last summer something happened and he took off, and I hadn’t heard from him since.”
“That was before we met then?”
Travis nodded.
Ashley frowned. “How come you didn’t know he was working here? I thought Karen gave you all the employee information and that kind of stuff.”
Travis could have kicked himself. “She did. Only the first page listed everyone by their initials, and I didn’t bother to go through the rest of the pages before we got here. His last name is Jones—not like that would set off any warning bells.”
“And it is a warning?” Ashley wiggled to the edge of the bed, her expression all earnest and concerned. “Before he took off, did you guys have a fight or something?”
The words or something stuck in his throat.
Sudden exhaustion hit like a two-by-four, carrying with it the recollection of pain. Travis stared into space and fought the rush of memories, and the confusion and the longings he had no right to have.
A soft stroke across his cheek made him glance into her dreamy eyes. “You’re drifting, Travis Coleman. You gonna tell me what’s got you all tangled into a knot? I won’t tease if you don’t want to share.”
Travis laughed. “Don’t take this the wrong way, but you let up on a secret? Bullshit. You’re like a dog worrying at a bone.”
“I can restrain myself if needed,” she insisted. She tugged him onto the bed and crawled over him, cuddling in tight and draping her arms around his shoulders until she was a human blanket. “I’m a good listener if you need one.”
Travis slid his hands onto her hips, stoking his thumbs over the soft stretch of bare skin at the waistline where her shirt had ridden up. He touched their lips together lightly, kissing her because he could. Ashley softened in his arms like always, leaning against him as if offering reassurance.
He pulled back far enough to watch her face as he spoke. He hated to confess, but maybe it was about time to give a little. There was no way he’d survive the summer without her support. “I hit on him.”
Her eyes widened. Not shock—more like delight. Then amazingly, a flush stole across her cheeks.
Ashley blushing? Well, there was a miracle.
“You going to say anything?” he asked.
Ashley swallowed. “Well, first off, I’m trying not to be distracted by the mental images of my angel and devil getting naked together, because holy shit, would that be hot.”
Travis’s body tightened involuntarily.
Her smile twisted up into self-mockery. “I’m a little embarrassed I flirted with him when he’s gay. No wonder he looked so uncomfortable.”
“Sweetheart, he totally looked uncomfortable because he wanted in your pants,” Travis reassured her. “Trust me, the guy likes women just fine.”
Her clever fingers were tangled in the hair at the back of his neck. “But you hit on him, which tells me you’ve got some explaining to do.”
“Fuck.” Travis took a deep breath. “Fuck, fuck, fuck.”
“You wish,” Ashley teased.
“God, you have such a smart mouth.” Travis accepted her caresses and the knowing expression in her eyes. Might as well leap all the way in. “I don’t get turned on by a lot of guys, but he does it for me. And when you mix it up with fighting, I kind of lost my head.”
She nodded slowly. “Fighting… So he knows?”
Travis gave in and gave up. “He knows I fight. He wasn’t sure why.”
“Do you know why?” The question whispered out. She was damn near holding her breath as if unwilling to interrupt him and break the spell.
He’d never come straight out and admitted it. Faced his needs, and the twist it gave him. But something called right now, and he had to admit that Ashley could probably understand part of his desire better than anyone.
He spoke softly, stroking her body as if drawing courage from the contact. “I like the pain. I crave it at times. It’s not only a physical need, but mental. Somewhere in the mist that crawls over me when I’m getting beat on, peace comes. It’s…more than pleasure, it’s like the most focused mental clarity in the middle of what should be killing me.”
“I knew about the pain part,” she admitted, “but the rest is new. You like it when control is out of your hands?”
Travis shook his head. “That’s the strange thing. I don’t think so. It’s not like how it turns you on when I order you around or tie you up. I still want to be in charge, which is why fighting works so well.”
She kissed his cheek. His jaw. Nuzzled her face against his and gave him comfort. “You are such a high-maintenance boyfriend,” she teased. “Can’t just get off on tying me up and fucking me blind. No, you need to be bossy and pick exactly how hard you get beat.”
Her words made him smile. “Variety makes the world go round.”
Ashley caught him in an enormous hug. “Damn right, and don’t you forget it.” She pulled back and stared at him intently. “You’re one hot number, Travis Coleman. Don’t you go thinking there’s anything wrong with looking for what you need.”
Confusion washed over him again as she threw him for a loop. “I thought you hated my fighting.”
She rolled her eyes. “Don’t be an idiot. I hated that you were getting into situations where you could get seriously hurt. If this is something
you get off on, find a safe way to meet the need. Like with someone who will stop when you’ve had enough, especially if you aren’t able to tell them when you’ve reached that point.”
He’d done too much looking into it to have much hope. “If you’re thinking about some fancy sex club you’ve read about, should I remind you I live in a small town in the backwoods of nowhere? Maybe down in California there’s a place on every corner where they hand out every kink in the book, but I’ve got what I got—a fight club or a bar. There’s no masters or slaves, or whatever the fuck they call themselves.”
Ashley stepped off him, straightening her skirt and blouse as she slipped her sandals back on. “You’re pretty tied up in labels for a redneck country boy, you know that? Use a little imagination. If you like pain I can use a crop on your ass, and I won’t expect you to call me sir or anything.”
He caught her hand and kissed her knuckles, fighting his laughter. “The idea of you whipping me doesn’t do it for me. I could tie you up with one hand and stop you at any time.”
“So it is about control?”
Travis paused to really consider the question.
Then the minx continued, her eyes bright with mischief again. “What about Cassidy whipping you? That idea sound any better?”
“Fuck.” Instant hard-on.
Her grin mocked him. “Well then, there’s part of your answer. And if you’re wondering? There’s another area I don’t give a damn about labeling. If it’s pleasure, I’m all for it. I have no issue watching you get it on with Cassidy, or helping you get it on with Cassidy. Or getting it on with you while Cassidy whips your ass. Or…”
He caught her against him and kissed her silent before he got overwhelmed with ideas triggered by her words.
She dug her fingers into his hair and gave back as good as she got. Only the fact they had to settle in stopped him from taking her right there on the skinny single mattress.
Sharing had been amazingly freeing even as he wondered where all this honesty was going to take them—and just how fucked he was that the idea of Cassidy standing over him with a crop made him shiver.
Cassidy pushed the final fifty-pound bag of oats onto the shelf and turned back to find the countertop was empty. “Is that it? We got it all put away already?”
The head cook nodded. “Never seen so much food vanish that quickly without me cooking it first.”
Cassidy laughed. “Thanks, Ted. Let’s see what the rest of them are up to.”
Through the swinging doors in the common room of the cookhouse, they found the small gathering of men and women who would be setting up the Trailblazer camp over the coming weeks. “You all survived your trip to town for supplies, I see.”
The youngest of the work crew, David, piped up. “It’s a damn long trip. Glad we don’t have to drive that too often.” He held out a beer, and Cassidy accepted it gratefully.
“You’re all good here for the next while. If you do have an emergency or things you need, make a list and someone will pick up what you need when we’re grabbing fresh food once a week.”
The door swung open, and Ashley stepped into view followed closely by Travis. Cassidy focused on keeping his expression neutral. “Come on in, I’ll introduce you to everyone.”
Travis pulled out a chair for Ashley before offering a hand to the oldest man at the table. “Travis Coleman. You must be Ted. Nice to meet you.”
The cook grinned and nudged the worker at his side. “See? My reputation is epic.”
Travis pointed at the dark-haired woman on the other side of the table. “Well, according to that one you’re sort of a god of the cookhouse. Vicki’s been sending message after message home to my baby brother for the past three days talking about how incredible you are. I heard about it every night—I think Joel was getting a little jealous.”
Vicki came around the table to give Travis a huge hug. “You’re a turkey.”
Travis squeezed her tight before tweaking her nose. “You’re lucky you’re engaged, or you’d have all these wildcats after you, not just Ted.”
Cassidy wasn’t sure when he’d lost control of the meeting. Travis seemed to know everyone and was ready to sweet-talk them all.
He stepped in. “Vicki, this is Ashley. She’s doing some photography work over the summer, and she’s a friend of Travis’s.”
Vicki’s cheeks bloomed crimson. “I know Ashley.”
Oh God. Cassidy glanced up at Travis, not surprised to see amusement on the bastard’s face. This was probably another tangled mess Cassidy didn’t want to know about that somehow, undoubtedly, Travis was at the center of.
Cassidy rushed through the rest of the introductions then motioned for Travis to join him. “Some of the equipment Karen ordered arrived, but I’m not sure what came is right. Can you go over it with me so we can make exchanges if needed?”
Travis nodded, kissed Ashley on the cheek then headed outside with Cassidy to the storage shed.
It took over an hour to get to the bottom of the list, a half-dozen items set aside to be sent back on the next trip and replaced with new tack.
Working by Travis’s side was awkward and yet so natural once he told himself to stop being an idiot.
The man had shown up with a woman who was obviously capable of keeping him happy in bed. All the sexual tension had to be on Cassidy’s side, but no fucking way was he going there. Not even when they touched and bumped in the tight quarters of the storage shed.
Cassidy was ready to head out the door to escape to fresh air and a cold shower when Travis spoke about something other than nose ropes and stirrups.
“You know, when you took off I tried to find you.”
This conversation had to happen sometime. Cassidy leaned on the wall, needing a solid base to hold him up. “I told you not to.”
Travis shrugged. “You see me doing what I’m told very often?”
His deadpan dry tone only made it even more wrong, but Cassidy still laughed. “No.”
Travis stepped closer, a lock of dark hair hanging over his forehead, his dark grey eyes burning into Cassidy’s. “I emailed you. I called. I texted.”
“Stalking me.”
His eyes blazed. “You’d been beat on, badly, because of me. I wasn’t sure if you were dead or alive. Not sure what kind of asshole simply takes off and leaves his best friend in the first place, but I was worried about you for more than one reason.”
Ouch, that one hurt. “I’m sorry. I know that part was wrong.”
“It was all wrong,” Travis snapped. “Even if I disgusted you, we’re still adults. You should have told me to fuck off. I could have laughed it off, and we’d still be friends.”
Cassidy’s chest burned. “You didn’t want to be simply friends, and like you said, how often do you do as you’re told?”
“So you took off.”
“Like a fucking shot.” The longer Travis pushed, the higher Cassidy’s temper rose. “I got out of there for your own damn good, and while I’m sorry about scaring you, I’m not sorry for stopping you from making the biggest damn mistake of your life.”
“It wasn’t your decision to make alone. We were best friends.” Travis dragged a hand through his hair, his voice shaking as he fought his anger. “I went to your house, you know.”
That was all it took for the bottom to fall out of his stomach. “You went where?”
“Your house—your folks’ place in Drayton Valley. I figured maybe they would know where you were.”
Blinding pain and white-hot anger rushed through Cassidy. “You had no right.”
“I was worried, do you not get it?” Travis demanded. “But for the record? Your old man is an asshole.”
Bitter laughter escaped. “Trust me, that’s not really news.”
Travis’s face tightened. “You know, I’ve pissed off my daddy pretty bad a bunch of times—my brothers as well. Never had one of them take out a shotgun and point it in my direction.”
Cassidy’s legs threatened
to give way. He held on to the shelf support like his life depended on it. “I’m so fucking sorry.”
Then typical Travis—typical full-of-bullshit, spit-into-the-wind Travis had the gall to grin. “Yeah, well, he didn’t shoot, so that was good.”
They stared at each other. Cassidy’s heart pounded so loud in the silence he wondered if Travis heard it as well. “So where do we go from here?” Cassidy asked. “You going to have trouble working with me all summer?”
Travis reached past him and adjusted a pile of horse blankets stacked on the shelf. “Already told you I didn’t. The question we really need to ask is slightly different.”
Cassidy refused to move, not even when Travis bumped into him putting the stack back in place. “What’s that?”
A hand landed on Cassidy’s shoulder, firm grip slipping down his arm until Travis’s fingers were wrapped around his biceps. “Does your offer to help me still stand?”
Too much had happened over the past nine months. Too many times he’d played through what had happened that day, and he honestly wasn’t sure what Travis was asking. “What kind of help?”
The tight grip on his arm lessened until it was a bare caress, Travis’s confidence seeming to ebb away as his voice lowered. “I’m not sure what I need, Cassidy, other than a friend. A good friend like you. Ashley is amazing, but I missed you like crazy, and I need to know you’ve got my back. That you still care at least a little.”
Caring only a little wasn’t the issue. Cassidy patted Travis on the shoulder, gripping him firmly. “I’m still your friend.”
The words came from his heart, even if being a friend meant that eventually he had to hurt Travis all over again.
Chapter Seven