by J. S. Scott
“He didn’t punch me. He backhanded me.”
“Just the fact that he touched you at all is a good reason for me to hunt him down. He can’t hurt you like this, Dani. Christ! Does he know what you’ve been through? Does he even care?”
“No,” I said softly. “No to everything. He doesn’t really know me at all.”
A sob escaped my mouth. Then another. And then one more. Tears started to flow free in a river down my face. “Don’t leave me right now. Don’t go to find him,” I pleaded.
“Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t,” he grumbled.
He was hesitating, his hand running up and down my back in comforting strokes.
“Because I need you more,” I said in a helpless tone, flinging my arms around his neck, knowing I had to let go and share my secrets.
Dani
Mindlessly sobbing my heart out wasn’t something I was used to doing, but it seemed so easy to just let it happen when Marcus was holding me against him, his solid body making me feel safe.
He lifted my body easily and then sat down on the couch, holding me on his lap while I released all of my sorrow, frustration, and fear.
He didn’t ask any questions.
He didn’t try to make me stop crying.
All he did was hold me, comfort me, giving me something I’d never had before.
“I hate crying,” I finally admitted with a hiccup.
His mouth by my ear, he said in a teasing voice, “For something you hate, you seem to be doing a lot of it.”
I smiled just a little, thinking that it was a typical Marcus kind of comment. But there was a thread of kindness running through the teasing tone, and that made me feel protected.
Honestly, Marcus made me feel safe to be myself, and I really needed to feel that way right now. “I think I’m done now.”
“By all means, feel free to continue,” he answered drily. “Having your shapely ass draped over my dick doesn’t bother me at all.”
“You’re completely perverted,” I accused as I gingerly swiped at my eyes.
“No, Dani. I’m worried about you.”
Those four simple words made my heart ache. I was used to traveling around, taking care of myself. I was alone. Always alone. I’d had a relationship in college, and I’d tried to have some kind of connection with a male correspondent, but it hadn’t ended well. Both of us traveled so much that we rarely got to meet up, and it had felt more like a friends-with-benefits type of thing. We finally broke it off, and I’d never even tried again. What was the point? I was always in motion, and no relationship had a chance when I traveled that much.
Most of the time, I didn’t mind relying on myself. I was used to going solo. But since Harper had found Blake, and after being held captive by a ruthless group of rebels, I recognized the emptiness in my soul. Problem was, I couldn’t just fill it by being with somebody. Many times, I’d be in a crowded room, but I still felt like I was alone. I’d never realized how much I craved that one person who would make me feel like I wasn’t lonely. Life experiences had changed me, and I couldn’t seem to completely fall back to the way I’d been before my kidnapping.
I guess my priorities had changed along with my personality.
“You don’t have to worry about me,” I argued.
I knew I could move now that I’d stopped crying, but the scent and feel of Marcus just felt so good that I didn’t even try.
His arms tightened around me. “For fuck’s sake, Dani, you’re dating a sociopath who just backhanded you until your face was black and blue.” He stroked a hand through my hair before adding, “Which reminds me, we need to treat that cheek.”
“I have ice,” I informed him, reaching over to the side table for the cold pack.
“Let me have it,” he rumbled, gently resting the pack on my face before he slowly slid me onto the couch so he could get up.
“Where are you going?” I hated that my voice sounded slightly panicked.
“You need to take something for pain and inflammation. Do you have that here?”
I had moved my hand to keep the cold pack on my face, and as I moved to get up, he protested. “Stay there,” he demanded. “I’ll find it.”
I tried not to notice that Marcus’s gruff protectiveness was one of the best things I’d experienced since my kidnapping. Maybe I shouldn’t find it as sweet as I did. It wasn’t like he was pouring on the charm because he really wasn’t all that charming. Or maybe he wasn’t to most people. But I found him nearly irresistible. Meaningless words and actions weren’t Marcus’s style, which made his protective instincts heartbreakingly adorable.
I directed him to the kitchen cupboard. I wasn’t able to see his face once he opened the door, but I could hear him rifling through the items impatiently until he found what he wanted.
He brought some ibuprofen and a glass of ice water.
“Nobody has taken care of me for a long time,” I mentioned as I accepted the items from him, dutifully swallowing the pills.
“I’m starting to think you need a damn bodyguard,” he said in a disgruntled tone as he sat back down on the sofa next to me, and took over holding the cold pack to my face and gathered me into his arms.
I sighed as I curled my feet beneath me and leaned against him. “Are you applying for the job?”
“Hell, no. I’d probably kill any guy who got within ten feet of you. I can’t watch this, Danica. I can’t see somebody hurt you again,” he answered in a husky, annoyed tone. “It nearly killed me to see what the rebels had done to you, and I can’t get the images of them abusing you out of my damn head. I know you made a mistake by crossing the border, but you did it to save some stupid teenagers. I get that. But why in the hell would you let Becker do this to you? Why?”
I took a deep breath and let it out slowly before I answered. “It took me some time to get my head straight after we came back to the US. I had intensive therapy, but I was suffering from PTSD and anxiety. It was so bad I was afraid of almost everything and everyone at first.”
“Understandable,” Marcus remarked. “Anybody would have felt the same way.”
“But I hated it. I’ve never been afraid of anything. I traveled the world alone.”
“You’re definitely fearless,” he agreed.
“No, I was fearless, Marcus,” I said. “Now I have to push through the fear I never felt before. I’ve come a long way in counseling, and after I’d become a little more stable, I remembered something I’d heard while I was in captivity. I remembered after I’d gotten over the initial trauma.”
“What?”
“I told you that I speak and understand Arabic, right?”
“Yeah.”
“The terrorists mentioned Gregory Becker’s name. Marcus, he’s helping to fund the rebels. He’s laundering funds to them. And I mean a lot of money. They consider him their leader in their war to take over territory because he’s the money behind it. His disgusting businesses like human trafficking and drugs help get the rebels to take more and more areas.”
He didn’t question my knowledge. “Jesus Christ! Why? I heard he was funding terrorists, but I never understood it. What in the hell does he have to gain?” he rasped.
“Money and power,” I told him. “He thinks the rebels are going to take control, which will give him control of the oil and resources. He doesn’t give a damn what their motivation might be. All he wants is to be king of the resources that will make him the richest man on earth. It’s crazy, but that’s the way he thinks.”
“Then why are you with him, Dani? If you overheard all this, what are you doing here? Why would you want to be with an asshole like him?”
I sighed, knowing it was time for me to be straight with Marcus. “I couldn’t go back to my Middle East beat, so I decided to get an exclusive story right here in my own country. He needs to be stopped. And nobody can get the evidence to convict him. I’ve heard he keeps a record of his illegal transactions so he knows how much money has been funne
led to the terrorists, and by what method or shell company. If I can find that journal, I’d have the information to have him put away forever. The funding to the terrorists would stop, and he wouldn’t be able to keep luring women into prostitution or human trafficking.”
“Fuck! You were planning on exposing him yourself?” Marcus exploded.
“Not exactly. I was going to take the information to the authorities, and time my exclusive to come out the same day they arrest him. Obviously, they’d need time to track down the evidence in a more substantial form than just a journal. But those records would give them the information they need to do it.”
“So you don’t love Becker?”
I tried to shake my head against his shoulder. “No.”
“Why did you say you needed him?”
“I do need him. I have to gain his trust. He finally asked me to come to his house, so I can get access to his home office and get what I need.”
“You don’t like being with him?”
“I like being with him as much as I’d like being in a locked room with venomous snakes,” I said with a shudder. “I can barely stand next to him. I can’t stand it when he touches me, and I have to hold back my hatred while he’s kissing me.”
“The bastard kissed you?” Marcus asked in a pissed-off tone.
“What choice did I have but to pretend I was hot for him? But every moment of it has been pure torture. However, if I can help take him down, it will be worth it.”
“The clothes?”
“He chooses exactly how he wants me to look. Becker is a control freak. Unfortunately, he’s fond of the hooker attire. He’s an asshole who thinks he owns every female he dates or screws. There isn’t an ounce of decency in him, Marcus, and believe me, I’ve looked. He’s pure evil.”
It felt good to finally tell somebody why I was trying to get close to Becker, but I knew it was going to cause complications.
“I’m relieved you haven’t lost your common sense completely, and you see Becker for what he is, but you can’t do this alone. And you can’t see him again, Danica. The abuse will just get worse from now on, and you’re putting your ass in danger…again.”
“I’m not quitting. I’ve already gotten close to him, close enough to get the information we need to put him away.”
I’d known I had to tell Marcus the truth. He deserved it. He’d saved my life, and I really didn’t want him to continue to think I was submitting to a crazed lunatic. I was hoping if I told him the truth, he’d stop riding my butt about not seeing Becker again. Apparently…not.
“You’re quitting. If I have to, I’ll kidnap you myself,” he said in a demanding voice.
I sat up and stared him in the eyes. “Try it. I’m not budging. Too many other people’s lives are at stake. Greg has to be stopped. He’s power hungry, and things could get even worse than they are now. What if he decides he needs to win more territory, more wars? He’s a master at covering his ass. He’s wary, paranoid, and devious as hell. Obviously he’s been a suspect for a long time, but nobody has been able to take him down. The authorities need information, data I can give them if I can just get to it.”
“So you’re just going to go to his home, fuck him, then look for the information?”
I shook my head slowly. “I don’t think I can let him touch me like that. I think I’ll throw up. I have to think of another way.”
“You make me crazy, woman. First, I’m rescuing you from the hands of people who would have eventually killed you, and now you’re getting yourself in too deep at home. This is risky and dangerous.”
“I can handle this, Marcus. I know I can. I have to do it to prove that I can still do something important. When I wasn’t able to go back to the Middle East, I missed it. There, I felt like I was telling important stories. I wanted people to understand the human suffering that was happening in that region. What I did meant something back then, and even though it might have been somewhat risky, bringing information out of those areas was vital. I lost that. Now I want to do something that’s going to help people again. I want to be done with being afraid. I want to do something useful.”
“You’re not doing this alone,” he insisted as he pulled my body against him again. “I can’t see you taking those kinds of risks.”
“I have no choice. Until I get the information, nobody will be able to touch him.” I sighed. “I have a friend I made here in Miami, a woman who was homeless and was taken in by what I believe is one of Greg’s human trafficking teams. They lured her in with a story about helping her get on her feet with a job, shelter, and food. Now they’re telling her that she owes them, and that she can’t leave until she pays them back. These jerks prey on the most vulnerable of people. Ruby was young. She hasn’t even hit her twenty-third birthday yet, and they want to auction her off so some rich man can use her body. This makes it even more personal to me. And the worst part is that I can’t take her in. I can’t help her and break my trust with Greg right now. But something has to happen soon. I have to rescue Ruby, and all the money is going to do is make the rebels stronger.”
“Jesus! You’re so damn stubborn. Why can’t you understand that I will never let you do this alone? I get why you want to do it, but it’s a risk you can’t take by yourself. And you can’t meet Becker again. If I see as much as a tiny scratch on you, I’ll lose it.”
“I’ll fight him. I won’t hold back and let him hurt me again. I can’t. It’s not good for my psyche.”
“That’s not enough. I’m going to help you, Dani, and it’s going to be on my terms.”
I was alarmed. “Marcus, you can’t. It’s dangerous enough for me, but for a man who is on his tail, it’s suicidal. He’d kill anyone who he thought was trying to dig up dirt on him.”
“He won’t suspect me,” he said nonchalantly.
“What makes you think that?”
“Because there are things you don’t know about me either, Dani, things nobody knows except my family.”
“What?” I asked breathlessly because his voice had suddenly turned so grim.
“I have the knowledge and the expertise to help you nail Becker.”
“How?”
“Because I’ve been gathering intel for a very long time. I’m not just an international businessman.”
I was silent, waiting for his explanation.
He continued matter-of-factly, “I’m also a spy.”
Dani
A spy?
Lord help me, I’d never thought of Marcus as delusional, but what he’d just uttered made no sense.
“What do you mean?” I asked hesitantly.
He answered calmly. “I mean that I work with the US government to gather intel from all of the countries I visit. I have a network of contacts, and I get whatever information I can to protect our national security.”
“Intel is CIA stuff,” I answered, still wondering where he was going with this conversation.
“Technically, I’m not on the CIA payroll. I’m a special agent because I chose to be.”
My mind flashed back to every location where I’d seen Marcus in the past. It had occurred to me so many times that he didn’t need to put himself in harm’s way, but he was in every hot spot in the world.
Sweet Jesus! Could what he was saying really be true? “H-how?” I stammered, still unable to reconcile Marcus the businessman with Marcus as some kind of James Bond. Not that the CIA really worked like the movie portrayals, but still…
He shrugged. “It’s not a big deal. I mostly just gather intelligence, and I’ve never really been suspect because I travel the world for business.”
“Marcus, you do it in foreign countries where you could be killed by anybody who finds out you’re sharing their information,” I said, astonished that a man as rich as Marcus would put his butt on the line like that.
“I don’t generally broadcast what I’m doing,” he answered drily.
“It’s dangerous,” I protested. “Who do you have for backu
p?”
“No one. I answer only to the top government officials. Nobody else knows.”
“What does your family think about these extracurricular activities? Have you told them that you’re going all James Bond while you’re traveling overseas?”
He released a masculine sigh. “First of all, special agents don’t go James Bond. Sometimes it’s actually rather boring.”
“Do you carry a gun?” I challenged.
“Of course. But a lot of people do.”
“Marcus, don’t bullshit me. Poking around in some third world countries could get you murdered.”
“Being a foreign correspondent can be just as bad. If I remember correctly, I did pull your gorgeous ass out of a rather ugly situation.”
He had me there. My job had put me too close to the front lines at times. “I was doing it for a cause. People need to know what’s happening in the world.”
“And I do what I do for my country. I hate politics, and I don’t like being involved in DC bullshit. That’s why my help is kept low profile. I wouldn’t last ten minutes doing Blake’s job as a senator. Right now, country doesn’t come before party for most of the DC crowd. It’s all about money. I’d put my fist in somebody’s face if I had to spend very long in Washington.”
I tried not to smile because we were talking about something dead serious, but I could see Marcus losing his patience in one hell of a hurry on the hill. He didn’t have the personality for that scene.
“You never answered my question about your family. Have they always known? How long have you been an agent?” I questioned, wanting to know everything at once. Honestly, I was still dumbstruck from his revelations. It wasn’t that I didn’t think Marcus had the balls for that kind of work, but it was a part of him I’d never seen before, and I was fascinated.