His arms shook, and his breath went ragged. I wasn’t sure how long he’d been working out, but his quiet grunts were pained. I wanted to tell him to stop, to take it easy, but pride was something Nash had always had, a quiet confidence, and I couldn’t imagine how he felt to be in less-than-peak physical form.
His right elbow buckled, and with a short cry, he collapsed to the ground in a small whirl of dust.
He lay like that for a while, head turned away from me, back rising and falling as he sought to catch his breath.
I sat up on the pallet, and he must have heard me moving, because he slowly raised to all fours, glancing at me before easing into a sitting position, back against the wall. He rested his wrists on his arms and eyed me, lips parted as he continued to gulp in oxygen.
He held my eyes for a long time, and I thought of all the times I’d mourned never getting to see his blue irises again. No one had eyes like him, the light blue surrounding by a dark ring. “How are you feeling?” I asked.
He shrugged. “Better than I was yesterday.”
“That’s a glass-half-full answer, right there.”
I grinned as he huffed a small laugh. “Haven’t been able to do much of anything physical for a long time. Thought I’d try some push-ups…” His voice trailed off, and his gaze settled somewhere between his bare feet.
“Hey, it takes time,” I said. “How about we get something to eat? Food last night was pretty good, so I know they’re feeding you.”
Nash rose slowly to his feet. “They do feed me.”
His sentence ended abruptly, like he’d meant to say more and stopped. I stepped in front of him. “What else were you going to say?”
He heaved a sigh. “I don’t have much of an appetite, or can’t keep it down.”
“Nash, you’ve been away from your pack for most of your life. Some Weres can tolerate going rogue, but most can’t. And you’ve been injured for who knows how long…” My voice failed me. I swallowed and tried again. “Where have you been all this time?”
He didn’t speak, only stared at me with widened eyes and a tense body.
“They found you at the Bluefoot pack. Was that who took you?” He shook his head, but offered no information. I didn’t know where to go from there, what questions to ask, how to pry. “You don’t want to tell me, do you?”
His gaze drifted over my shoulder and his fists clenched at his sides. “Not right now. No.”
Okay, I could handle that. He was alive, and that was what mattered. I’d make sure he stayed that way. “Well, now I’m here, and so are Vaughn and Dal. Number one goal is for you to heal and get your strength back. I’m not leaving your side until I see you eat a dozen solid meals, and until I can no longer see your ribs.”
I thought he’d smile, laugh at me, but if anything, his face fell. “Bay.”
“Are you going to argue with me about this? About healing you?”
He squeezed his eyes shut and shook his head, his shoulders relaxing. “Nah, I’m not going to argue.”
“Good.”
“Fine.”
“Okay.”
We stood there staring at each other. He raised his eyebrows at me. “You’re not going to go stomp off in search of food?”
“Yes, I just wanted to make sure you were watching me. Didn’t want to waste a good stomp without a witness.”
He laughed at that, a short burst of rusty sound. “Go on, then.”
I was smiling as I turned my back and stomped my feet a couple of steps. We walked out into the morning sun, and I stretched my arms over my head, tilting my head back to warm my face. I sighed and turned to Nash, who was watching me. He looked away quickly, squinting at a farm field in the distance. He pointed to it. “They grow crops over there, and they also have some chicken and roosters that they use for meat and eggs.”
“What crops do they grow?” I asked, walking toward the field.
Nash walked with me. Compared to yesterday, his shoulders weren’t as hunched, and he held his head higher. I liked to think that was because of me, but I knew it was the result of him finally being around pack again.
“Necessities,” he answered. “Wheat for bread, some vegetables like carrots and peas.”
“Can they feed everyone?” I propped my foot on the fence surrounding the crops and watched as a young male novus picked weeds. I remembered our meal last night. We’d eaten well.
Nash sighed. “Pace will tell you they can, because he won’t want to admit that this whole pack is on borrowed time. But they can’t feed everyone. Every month they travel farther outside the walls to hunt small game and pick wild berries, edible roots and mushrooms, anything. It’s getting dangerous.”
“I suggested opening up trading with Pace. He didn’t say a word and looked suspicious.”
“Pace is…” Nash blew out a breath. “Pace has fought long and hard to make this pack what it is today, and he’s been an amazing alpha. I can’t speak for him, but what I know of him, he’s going to be cautious about owing anything to another pack. He values this pack’s independence, and he wants it to be self-sufficient. The problem is that it cannot be. They need more livestock, seeds for more crops. They are running out of textiles too.”
“So he’s hesitating to trust me?”
“Yes.”
“He trusts you though, right? How did you earn his trust?”
Nash waved to the novus, who waved back, but the young werewolf’s wary eyes were on me. “They worked hard to keep me alive when they found me. There’s not much left in this world, but there’s still honor. He knows I owe them for saving me.”
“And now you can come back.” Just thinking of how happy Dare and Reese would be to see Nash alive filled me with warmth. And then I’d have him, back at the Silver Tip compound with his pack, where he’d always belonged. With me. “Nash, it’s amazing there now. We have plenty of food, and we live fairly peacefully.”
Nash’s eyebrows lowered. “Fairly?”
“Well, there was Gage’s attempted mutiny which wasn’t so great for me or Dare, but was way worse for Gage.”
A ripple went through Nash’s body, and his nails extended where they gripped the scarred wood railing. “Explain.” His voice was lower.
“Control your shift, Nash. Gage is dead, it’s okay.”
“Explain,” he barked out.
I blew out a breath. “When you saw Dare and Reese, I was back at the compound as the interim alpha until Dare got back. Well, that’s when Gage got his cronies together. They dragged me out of bed, beat me bad and tied me up with silver so I couldn’t heal or shift. It was agony until Dare got back and Gage challenged him. I swore for a minute…” I flashed back to that day, when Gage had forced Dare to kneel in an effort save his mate’s life. If it hadn’t been for Reese turning into a superwolf because of his mating with Dare, we would all be dead. I shook my head. “It’s fine now. I’m healed.” Physically.
I’d told Dare I was fine, that I was over it. But that feeling of helplessness had slipped under my skin like a splinter and I couldn’t get it out. I hadn’t felt that way since my mother was killed and I’d had to watch Dare challenge our uncle for alpha of the pack. I was so damn tired of loss. Of pain. Of death.
Lost in my own thoughts, I hadn’t realized Nash had stiffened. His eyes swirled, and hair sprouted on the backs of his hands. I reached for him. “Whoa, it’s fi—”
He grabbed me, hauling me into his arms so fast, my feet temporarily left the ground. I wrapped my arms around him, closing my eyes as he snuffled into my neck, scenting me. “Dare killed him?” he asked, his voice muffled against my skin.
I opened my eyes, but stared sightlessly ahead as I remembered the giant werewolf ripping Gage’s head in two. “Reese killed him. Ripped his head off.”
“Dare’s werewolf mate?” Nash pulled back to look at me.
I nodded. “He’s a lot like Pace.” I pushed Nash’s hair out of his eyes. “You’ll see when you meet him.”
&n
bsp; His eyes clouded and he looked away from me.
“Hey,” I said. “Why do you keep doing that? Why do you act like you don’t want to go home?”
Nash swallowed, his Adam’s apple bobbing. “I’m not sure. It’s just been so long. I’m not sure I have a home anywhere.” His gaze swept to me, and a slight smile twisted his lips. “Except when I’m around you.” He gripped me tighter, and warmth flared through me where his fingers pressed into my flesh. I inhaled deeply, wanting to wrap myself in his scent. He touched his temple to mine and I closed my eyes. “You smell like home, Bay.”
For once, I kept my mouth shut, and as much as I wanted to ask him more questions, this moment was one I’d dreamed of since he’d left my life. I didn’t want to fuck it up. We had time now, a lot of it, because there was no way in fuck Nash would be alone again. He belonged with his pack and with me. As I held a trembling Nash in my arms and ran my hands down his scarred back, I knew I’d do anything I could do see him healed and whole and happy once again.
Chapter Four
Now that I was paying attention, I saw what Nash meant about the Whitethroat’s provisions. Pace put on a good show in an effort to prove the pack was fine, but the portions were small and they were bolstering the meager vegetables and proteins with grains and other less nutritious foods. A healthy diet for werewolves and Weres was heavy on protein and vegetables. Not bread.
We sat with Pace and a few of his top wolves, one of which was his sister. Vara was quiet and studied me with eyes the same as her brother’s. Her hair brushed her shoulders, bearing the same patch of white over her right temple as Pace’s. She didn’t eat, and only drank water from a tin mug.
We’d need to leave soon. Even though Dal, Vaughn, Nash and I were only four Weres, I didn’t want to stretch their food much longer. Plus I was eager to get Nash back around his own pack. He sat beside me, eating quickly, cleaning his plate before anyone else. Pace raised his eyebrows at him, like Nash’s actions were surprising, then I remembered Nash saying he hadn’t been eating well. When I’d first found him…my stomach churned thinking about it. It was almost like he’d been waiting to waste away. I brushed the back of my hand along his thigh, and he jerked, then leaned against my side, his instinct not letting him keep his distance.
“Thought I’d give you a tour today,” Pace said after our plates were cleared away. “Show you around the compound and a little outside our walls.”
“Do you send scouts out to find where the Nowere packs are?” I asked.
“We do,” Vara spoke up. “We split the area up around our walls into four quadrants. Each one gets patrolled twice a week.”
“How big are the quadrants?” Dal asked.
“Ten miles out,” Vara answered.
Dal seemed satisfied with that answer and leaned back in her chair. Vaughn was still tense beside me, his gaze on Pace. I worried he was plotting to get back at Pace for our initial treatment. I needed to talk to him about keeping his cool. If he fucked this up, or risked Nash in some way, I’d hurt him.
“I’d love a tour,” I said. “And I’d love to discuss trade with you.”
“Trade or aid?” Pace’s lips curled as he watched me over the rim of his mug.
“Trade,” I said firmly. “Although I see nothing wrong with aid. Our alpha’s mate was born a Whitethroat, and we have also welcomed his brother and sister into our pack—”
Vara showed the first sign of emotion I’d seen from her in the last hour when she slammed a hand down on the table. “Selene lives?”
“Jude too,” Pace added.
I nodded. “Both. And they are mated. Selene with a Bluefoot werewolf, and Jude with a Great Were.”
Pace’s eyes widened. “I’m sorry. What did you say about Jude?”
“G,” Nash said with a smile. “Right? He arrived shortly before I…” His smile faded, his eyes clouding. My heart clenched.
“Yeah,” I said, trying to get his attention. “G. He had a mate and they had a daughter, but then his mate died. He dotes on Jude like he’s the most precious thing.”
A sound from across the table drew our attention. Vara’s hand was at her throat, and she was blinking rapidly, her eyes shining. Pace gripped her other hand and they smiled at each other. Pace blew out a shaky breath. “You have to understand, any time we learn of a Whitethroat still alive, it’s a gift. After all we’ve been through…”
“We did what we had to do to make this pack thrive again,” Vara said, her voice low.
I wasn’t sure what she was referring to. “What was life like after the attack?”
Pace’s eyes swept the room, and he clasped his hands on the table. “It was a dark time. We were all young novuses. We emerged from our underground bunker after the attack to find we were all alone. No adults, just us.”
“How many of you were there?” I asked.
“About seventy-five.” He shook his head. “Fifteen didn’t make it through the next year, either too traumatized from grief or from an accident. We tried to establish a leader, but we all had different ideas on how to run the pack.” His jaw clenched and he shook his head as Vara pressed closer to his side. “There were years of challenges for pack alpha. I came out on top, but it was not a victory, not with all the casualties I’d left in my wake to make it there. I did what I had to do, because I was convinced I knew how to run the pack. Vara and me. So I fought for both of us.”
I honestly couldn’t imagine emerging from underground to find your home destroyed and no one to lead. “And is your pack stable now?”
“It is,” Pace said. “We’ve been growing our population, encouraging our pack to breed, and so far we’ve increased our numbers by about twenty-five percent.”
“That’s great, but can you sustain that number?”
Pace’s eyes narrowed, and he looked like he was about to snap at me, but Vara put a hand on his arm. He glanced at her and fell silent. “You mentioned trade,” she said.
“We already trade with a few Were packs near us. Reese will want to open up communication with you, and why not benefit from that?”
“What if we have nothing you need?” Vara’s eyes were a little unsettling. She stared straight at me, and I wasn’t sure she blinked once.
Vaughn leaned forward, his gaze shifting between Vara and Pace. “I’m going to be honest, and no offense meant. You’re a young pack, and I think I speak for all of us that we’re impressed with what you’ve done. But you need help here. You’re growing your pack, but you need food to sustain that growth.” He narrowed his eyes at Pace. “You’ve done a lot for this pack, so don’t let them down now because you have too much pride to get help from some Weres.”
Pace leapt to his feet, his lips curling back as Vaughn matched him, a snarl ripping from his throat.
If these two didn’t kill each other, I was going to kill them myself. I stood up and splayed my hands between the two of them. “Enough!” Would Vaughn ever learn to keep his mouth shut? I pointed at him. “Sit.”
“I said what needed to be said.” He sat down with thud, crossing his thick arms over his chest.
Pace was breathing hard, his chest expanding as he clenched his hands at his sides. “Don’t question how much I’ll sacrifice for this pack. You don’t know anything about me.” He turned fiery eyes toward me. “You want to know why I hesitate to trade with you?”
Nash sucked in a breath beside me, and I really could have used a heads up on what was all happening here. I stared at Pace’s flared nostrils, trying to slow my racing heart to bring some calm to the situation. “Sure.”
He stomped off, Vara at his heels, her wave signaling us to follow. Nash walked ahead of us, while Vaughn and Dal flanked me. I turned to look at Vaughn over my shoulder. “Can you go one conversation without pissing him off? I’m trying to start a friendly relationship.”
Vaughn was pouting. “How is this all my fault? He starts shit too. Gets under my skin. The fucker.”
I rolled my eyes as we left the
main building and traveled toward the very back of the compound in the direction of an innocuous wooden door inset into the stone of the walls.
Pace took a key from around his neck, inserted it into the lock, and then opened the door. He waved us through, and I peered around Nash’s body as we entered.
There was no roof, just four stone walls, the floor carpeted with a dense plant with glistening green leaves. I stayed along the wall, not wanting to touch the plant until I knew what it was. There was no discernible smell other than dirt, and we all shuffled together. Fifty square feet of rows of plants lay before us, and I didn’t move until Pace stepped forward and rubbed his fingers on a plant. The pads of his fingers came away shiny with oils. “This,” he said, “is ruebane.”
“Is it edible?” Vaughn asked.
“We don’t eat it,” Pace said drily. “We use these oils to coat our bodies and it renders us undetectable to Noweres.”
I blinked at him. “I’m sorry, what did you say?”
He picked a stalk and walked toward me, holding it out. “Whatever is in this oil masks our scent. You cover yourself with ruebane and you can walk among Noweres like you’re one of them.”
“Are you fucking serious?” Vaughn looked like he was about to dive into the plants and roll around in them. “How the hell did you find this stuff?”
“Couple of years ago… maybe five?” Pace shot Vara a quizzical look and she nodded to confirm. “Yeah, about five years ago we were patrolling outside the walls and saw a whole patch of this stuff. We told Juk not to touch it, but he’s a dumbass and did anyway, then put a whole bunch in his pockets because he said he wanted to study it. When we ran into a small Nowere pack, they ignored him. Like he wasn’t even there. Since then, we’ve done some experiments coating ourselves in it and walking among Noweres. It’s mostly foolproof.”
“What exactly do you mean, undetectable to Noweres?” I wasn’t rubbing myself down with this stuff until I knew exactly how it worked.
Vara stepped forward. “The oil masks your scent. We’re not sure what the Noweres think we smell like, but we know that we don’t smell like Weres or werewolves to them.”
Chasing Destiny (Silver Tip Pack Book 2) Page 4