“I’m glad,” Marie said. “You’ve changed, you know, since you moved down here.”
“Is that a good thing or a bad thing?”
“I haven’t made up my mind yet. One thing that I think is good is that you’re not as driven as you used to be when you were working in Savannah. You used to scare me, you were so focused. Work, running, work. I used to wish you’d slow down and have some fun.”
“And the bad?” Brooke was almost afraid to ask.
“Oh, Brooke.” Marie sighed. “Your self-esteem is so low. What happened to my golden girl? The triumphant soccer player, the kid who went to summer camp by herself at the age of six and never looked back or acted homesick? It hurts me to see you being so hard on yourself.”
Brooke felt a tear slide down her cheek. She swallowed hard and tried to find the words.
“I screwed up. Royally. Let you guys down. Left poor Harris standing at the altar. Left Dad holding the bag for that hideously expensive wedding. Quit my job, ran away from home, and if that’s not enough, I got myself knocked up. Had a kid out of wedlock. I’m like some big, stupid sitcom. Only nobody’s laughing.”
Marie pushed Brooke off her lap and prodded her back into a sitting position. “Look at me, Brooke Marie. Tell me the truth. Do you regret not marrying Harris?”
“No,” Brooke said quickly. “Just the way I handled everything.”
“Do you regret having Henry?”
“Never! He’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”
“That’s what I thought,” Marie said. “So you made some mistakes. Doesn’t everybody?”
“Maybe,” Brooke said, still unconvinced. “But you can’t pretend you were thrilled that I got pregnant the way I did.”
“The baby was definitely a surprise,” Marie admitted. “I wasn’t even aware you were seeing somebody. And you still haven’t told me anything about Henry’s father. All I know is that you say he’s not in your life anymore. That’s the part that’s really hard for me. I know you, Brooke. I know you don’t have casual relationships. So this man … this mystery man. He’s still Henry’s father. Our boy has his DNA. And I’m only human. I can’t help but wonder about him. Why aren’t you together? Did he hurt you that badly? Are you still in love with him? Is he a good man?”
Brooke looked into her mother’s dark blue eyes and saw only love and acceptance. She felt herself exhale slowly. Holding the secret of Pete, she realized, was exhausting. And senseless. And selfish.
“His name is Pete. Pete Haynes,” she began. “Henry has his smile. And his big feet. And yes, he’s a very good man. I think you’d like him. And I know he’d love you.”
The words came tumbling out, like a dammed-up torrent of story and emotion.
She told her mother how she’d met Pete during her summer job in DC. Her harmless secret summer fling. How she’d run into him at the barbecue restaurant in Savannah, at a lunch meeting with her wedding florist, for God’s sake!
“Seeing Pete, after all that time,” Brooke said. “I can’t even describe how I felt. It was terrifying. I was already having these nagging midnight doubts about me and Harris. If we were really right for each other. And then to run into Pete—two weeks before my wedding! It was like seeing a ghost, Mom. I hadn’t thought about this guy in years. At the end of that summer, I came home and moved in with Harris and started law school. Mentally, I put Pete Haynes in a shoe box, taped it up, and shoved it in the back of my closet. But that day, at freaking Johnny Harris Barbecue, the tape came off. And I couldn’t stop it. I couldn’t stop thinking about Pete.”
“I wish you’d told me,” Marie said quietly.
“I couldn’t tell you, because I couldn’t admit it to myself. I was having anxiety nightmares. Panic attacks. I got some Xanax from a girlfriend at work, but the Xanax just made me feel stoned. It didn’t get Pete out of my head.”
“So when you ran away, the night of your bachelorette party?” Marie asked.
“I got in the car and started driving. That day at Johnny Harris, Pete told me he was staying on Cumberland, working on some project for the National Park Service. I didn’t have a plan. Not really. I told myself I was going to Loblolly just to hang out and give myself time to think. But that was a lie. I wasn’t running away from Harris. I was running to Pete.”
Brooke found her half-empty glass of wine and drained it.
“Of course, when I threw myself at him on Cumberland, he turned me down flat. Told me he didn’t want to be my rebound boy.”
At some point, Brooke got her phone and showed Marie the last photo she’d taken of Pete before he’d left for Alaska. It had been taken while they were kayaking on the river. He was bearded and bare-chested, laughing, the late-day sun making a halo around his shaggy, unkempt hair.
Marie peered down at the phone, enlarged the image, then tapped the photo with her index finger. “The freckles. That’s where they came from. I’ve always wondered.”
“It’s uncanny,” Brooke said. “Henry has the exact same number of freckles sprinkled over his nose and cheeks as his father. I know, because I counted them. While Pete was asleep. The morning after…” She blushed. “The morning after Henry was conceived.”
Marie didn’t seem shocked. “When did things change between you? I mean, you just told me he rejected you when you showed up on Cumberland Island after you called off the wedding.”
“We mutually agreed that we should take things slowly. The old ‘let’s just be friends’ kind of deal. I realized I wasn’t in any kind of shape to start a new relationship, I was trying to get my law practice up and running, and Pete’s a naturally cautious person. We were seeing each other casually, at least at first.”
“And then?”
Brooke twisted a strand of hair around her finger, avoiding her mother’s probing eyes.
“Pete had applied for this research grant to study elk migration patterns in the tundra. It meant living in this remote base camp in Alaska. That’s where he is, by the way. Alaska. It’s a three-year project. Out of nowhere, he told me he loved me and wanted to be with me. I guess that’s when it hit me that things had changed between us. We’d gotten serious when neither of us expected to. So … one thing led to another. Spontaneous combustion, you might say. And by spontaneous, I mean, I wasn’t on birth control.”
“Oh, Brooke.” Marie sighed.
“The next morning, Pete asked me to go with him.”
“And you said?”
Brooke shrugged. “I wasn’t very diplomatic. I mean, what was I going to do in the middle of the Alaskan tundra? Sue a moose? I drove him to the airport, and we talked about my flying out to see him at Christmas. Six weeks later, I figured out I was pregnant.”
“And you never told him? Never let him know he was going to be a father?”
“I wanted to. We were Skyping every other day, and he was so excited about being in Alaska. Everything was new and fascinating, and his work was really intense. He’d be out in the field, four or five days at a time, camping and tracking these radio-collared elk. I thought, if I tell Pete I’m pregnant, he’ll think he has to come back here to take care of me and the baby. It would mean giving up his grant.”
“Shouldn’t that have been his choice to make?”
“Maybe. But I was having doubts of my own. I loved Pete, but I didn’t want to be trapped into having a relationship just because of a baby. What if he did come back? And it turned out we weren’t actually good together?”
“That’s just a risk you have to take in a relationship,” Marie said. “In life. Nothing ventured, nothing gained.”
“I’m not sure I agree with you,” Brooke said, suppressing a yawn. “Henry and I, we’re doing okay. It’s not easy. In fact, most of the time, being a single mom is terrifying. But I don’t regret it.” She met her mother’s steady gaze. “What about you, Mom? Any regrets?”
Marie stood slowly, then pulled Brooke to a standing position. “No. I don’t regret giving up my career to have time to raise my
brilliant, gorgeous daughter. I don’t even regret marrying your dad. We had lots of good years, you know. I’d never give Patricia the power to take that away from me. The way I see it now, I got the better part of the deal. The man I married was young and fun, the adventurous and romantic Gordon. Look at him now. Yes, now he has more time and lots more money to spare, but Patricia’s got the cranky, high blood pressure, potbellied Gordon. I saw them across the room at a wedding at the Oglethorpe Club a couple of weeks ago, and he looked miserable. Patricia couldn’t even get him to go out on the dance floor.”
“The two of you used to dance all the time, especially at weddings and Christmas parties,” Brooke said. “When I was a teenager I thought it was sooooo gross. Parents dancing together!” She covered her eyes in mock horror.
Marie went into Henry’s nursery, fetched a stack of bed linens, and proceeded to make up a bed on the sofa.
“See you in the morning,” Brooke said, yawning and giving her mother a peck on the cheek. “I almost forgot. Were you planning on staying over Sunday night?”
“Yes. Why?”
“If you really don’t mind staying and watching Henry, I’m supposed to go up to Sea Island Sunday afternoon to meet with Gabe Wynant.”
“Really?” Marie arched an eyebrow.
“It’s about Josephine Warrick. I’m going to take her case on, after all. But I don’t know the first thing about condemnation law. So I called Gabe, and he’s agreed to meet with me and try to walk me through it.”
“That’s awfully nice of him,” Marie said. “It’s just a shame about poor Sunny. You’d think it might be a kind of relief, after all he went through with her, but I hear he’s really quite bereft.”
“Bereft? Did something happen to Sunny Wynant?”
“You didn’t know? She died.”
“No! I had no idea. What happened?”
“Liver cancer. She drank herself to death. I guess it’s been over a year ago now. Maybe two? I used to know her from altar guild, before she started drinking. She used to be so much fun. She had a really wicked sense of humor.” Marie shook her head. “Such a waste.”
“That’s terrible,” Brooke said. “But I’m glad you told me before I see him.”
“You say you decided to work for Josephine, after all?” Marie asked. “What changed your mind?”
“Josephine did. She just wouldn’t take no for an answer. And maybe, just maybe, I’m ready for a challenge.”
Brooke remembered the last conversation she’d had with the old lady.
“Mom? Did you know Granny was engaged to somebody else? Before Grandpop?”
“Hmm? Who told you that?”
“Josephine did. Her family threw an engagement party at Shellhaven for Granny and this man, but something awful happened, and the wedding got canceled.”
“Really? This is the first I’ve heard of such a thing. It’s hard for me to picture my mother with another man. She was so devoted to Pops. Did Josephine give you any more details than that?”
“No. She said the man, whoever he was, wasn’t a good person.”
“I’d definitely be interested in hearing more about this mystery man,” Marie said.
“You can ask Josephine all about it when you and the other two women meet with her over on Talisa.”
“You think she’s really serious? About leaving the island to the three of us?”
“She’s dead serious,” Brooke assured her.
18
October 1941
Josephine tapped loudly on the guest room door. “Millie? Are you all right?”
The muffled reply came a minute later. “I’m all right.” In another moment, the door opened slightly to reveal Millie, looking pale and exhausted, still wrapped in a bathrobe.
“It’s nearly noon!” Josephine exclaimed. “Your mother and grandmother just left on the boat for St. Ann’s.” She peered at Millie’s face. “You look terrible. Are you sick?”
“Maybe a little hungover. I don’t think champagne agrees with me.”
“Come down to lunch,” Josephine said. “Mrs. Dorris will fix you something nice and light. Some soup or something.”
“Ugh. Food. I’ll come down, but I think I’ll just stick to coffee. What about the others? Has everybody gone already?”
“A lot of people needed to get to Jacksonville to catch the train at two,” Josephine said. “Ruth’s still here, of course, and I think some of the men were planning an early-morning fishing trip.”
“Have you seen Russell this morning?” Millie whispered.
“Not yet, but if I do see him, I might have to slap his face for the rude way he acted at the party last night. What a scene he made!”
“I’m so sorry,” Millie said, tears pooling in her eyes.
“Don’t you apologize for him,” Josephine scolded. “You didn’t do anything wrong.”
“I shouldn’t have danced with Gardiner,” Millie said. “It didn’t look right.”
“Why shouldn’t you dance with my brother? He was your host. And it wasn’t as if your fiancé was dancing with you. Honestly, Millie, I don’t understand why you have to marry him…”
“Don’t!” Millie shook her head. “I’ll be down in a few minutes.”
* * *
She slipped into the dining room and chose the chair beside Ruth’s.
“Good morning,” Samuel Bettendorf boomed. “How’s our bride today?”
“I’m fine, thank you,” Millie said. “Please forgive me for oversleeping. I guess I’m not used to late hours and champagne. But it truly was a lovely party, Mr. B. Russell and I are so grateful for your hospitality.”
Mrs. Dorris came into the room and offered a platter heaped high with golden fried chicken.
“No, thanks,” Millie said quickly. “Is there any coffee?”
“Where is Russell?” Samuel asked.
Josephine rolled her eyes, and Ruth choked back a giggle.
“He talked about going fishing this morning,” Millie said. “Or maybe hunting?”
“I know some of the fellows went out fishing on the big boat with Captain Morris because I saw them off,” Samuel said. “Russell wasn’t with them. If he did go out later, in the skiff, I hope he got Omar or one of the other boys to go out with him. These tidal creeks have so many twists and turns, it’s easy to get lost if you’re not familiar with the topography.” He sipped his coffee and turned to his daughter. “And what are you young ladies up to this beautiful day?”
Josephine consulted her best friends. “Maybe some bridge, if we can scare up a fourth?”
“Good idea,” Ruth said. “Maybe Gardiner can play.”
Samuel set his coffee cup down with a clatter, got up, and abruptly left the room.
Josephine watched his departure with a sigh. “Gardiner’s gone,” she announced. “He took the early boat.”
“Gone where?” Millie’s blue eyes widened with surprise.
“Canada. He’s joining the Royal Canadian Air Force. He says he’s not going to sit around and twiddle his thumbs while Hitler invades the rest of Europe. Papa’s furious. He and Gardiner have been arguing about this for months. Papa says what happens in Czechoslovakia and Poland is none of our business, but Gardiner is dead set on doing this. You know he’s had his pilot’s license since he was eighteen.”
“Gardiner’s a gun jumper? Aren’t you proud of him?” Ruth asked.
“He’s really gone?” Millie repeated. “To Canada? You’re sure?”
“I took him to the dock myself,” Josephine said. “He was trying to leave without saying goodbye to anybody, but I caught him sneaking down the back stairs with his valise this morning, and I made him tell me what he was up to. He was afraid Papa would try to stop him from going.”
“He never said a word,” Millie mumbled.
“Gardiner’s like Papa that way. He plays his cards close to his vest. I’m mad at him too, of course. To think he thought he could just disappear like that, without telling anybody.
He said he planned to send a telegram once the train stopped in Atlanta, but honestly, that’s so like a man.”
“I think it’s terribly exciting,” Ruth said. “Think about it. He’ll be going to Europe, fighting those awful Nazis. My father says Hitler won’t stop at Czechoslovakia and Poland. He won’t stop until he’s goose-stepped all the way across the continent.”
“Don’t let my papa hear you say that,” Josephine warned. “He doesn’t want our country dragged into another war. You know he fought in the last one.”
“My father did too,” Millie said. “Mother says he was never the same after he came home from France.”
“Let’s not talk about war anymore now,” Ruth proclaimed. “It’s too sad.”
Josephine jumped up from her seat. “Agreed. Come on, girls. We’ll take a ride in the roadster and stir up some kind of fun. And you know, there’s a full moon tonight. I say it’s time for the High Tide Club to meet. What do you say?”
Ruth clapped her hands. “Brilliant!”
“I’ll get Mrs. Dorris to pack us a picnic dinner, and we’ll send for Varina to come too.” She looked over at Millie, who was gazing out the dining room’s french doors at the garden outside.
“Did you hear, Millie? Tonight’s the night!”
“I heard,” Millie said.
* * *
Josephine drove the roadster to Oyster Bluff, and the others waited while she knocked on the door of the simple wood-frame house where the Shaddixes lived.
It was nearly dusk, and guinea hens roosted in the lower branches of the chinaberry tree that shaded the yard, which was swept sand neatly bordered with sun-bleached giant whelk shells.
“I can’t come with y’all tonight,” Varina said.
“Of course you can,” Josephine said. “It’s Saturday night, isn’t it?” She lowered her voice. “We’re going to Mermaid Beach. For the High Tide Club.”
The girl shook her head. “No, I can’t. My daddy won’t let me.”
A man’s voice came from within the house. “Varina? Who’s that you’re talking to out there?”
“It’s me, Josephine,” the older girl called. “How are you tonight, Harley?”
The High Tide Club Page 11