by Roya Carmen
I bend my head toward him and tease a little, dragging my tongue against him, swirling around. His delicious groans tell me I’m doing just fine. I look up at him, and he’s looking down at me. Of course he’s watching. Men enjoy looking. They get off on seeing themselves slide in and out of a woman’s mouth. August is different from any man I’ve ever known, but he’s still very much a man.
I take him deeper in my mouth. I pull away to tease for just a second, then I go back in. I feel him grow eager as he gets closer. This is where I should go harder, faster. Instead, I pull away. I am cruel, but it’s for his own good. He’ll thank me later. Much later.
For now, he’ll want to kill me.
He stares at me, confusion all over his face, and I pull myself up toward him. “Next time,” I whisper against his ear, “I’ll go all the way, but before that can happen, you need to give me more.”
A guttural groan escapes his mouth. “Ruby Riverstone… you are evil.”
“I know,” I say as I grab my panties off the floor.
“What do I need to do?” he asks as he buttons up his pants. “Just tell me, and I’ll do it.”
“Well, you did very well today – venturing out onto the porch, the ride into town – but next time I want you to go a little farther.”
He smiles, and I’m happy to see he doesn’t want to kill me after all. He’s willing to play along. That’s what this is after all – a little game. But it’s also a form of therapy. I’m convinced if he can keep going farther, if he’s motivated enough, he can get past this.
“And what do I get if I go farther?” he asks.
I lean into him again. “You get to come in my mouth. You get to stick your cock in my pussy.” I want to arouse him. I want to tempt him. “Or wherever else it pleases you, sir.”
“Damn.” He bites down a smile. “That’s motivation right there.”
I laugh, a hot flush spreading across my cheeks. I can’t believe I’m being so brazen.
“But I want one more thing,” he says softly.
“What?” I ask, a little guarded. “Pearl necklace? A little butt play?” I go through the possibilities in my head. I know there are a lot, but I’m a little naïve in that department. “I will not let you pee on me.”
He laughs. “No… all I want is…” He measures his next words, almost as if he’s not sure if he wants to say them at all. “All I want is… you.”
So sweet. “Me? Why, what do you mean exactly, Mr. Hyde?”
He draws me to him, pulls my hair at the nape of my neck, and presses his mouth firmly against my ear. He’s so intense, and I have no clue what he’s about to say. My heart beats frantically, a fight-or-flight reaction. I realize that a small part of me is still afraid of him despite all I know now.
“I want slow,” he says. “I want a big bed. I want you completely naked. I want to make sweet love to you. I want you to still be there in the morning.”
I smile and let out a sigh of relief. “Why, that’s a little vanilla, Mr. Hyde.”
He smiles. “There’s nothing wrong with vanilla. You can never go wrong with vanilla.”
August
Hours after Ruby has left, I’m still rattled. My heart is still not quite beating a proper rhythm. She’s brought out so many emotions in such a short amount of time: fear, anxiety, exhilaration, pleasure, pain, and intense desire. My body is still reeling.
I’m on a high, pacing around the house like a dog waiting for his owner to take him outside. I know I won’t get to sleep anytime soon. I take a long, hot bath, thinking of her. All I can think about is Ruby and all she has helped me achieve. I actually stepped out of my house and wasn’t overtaken by panic. I drove into town, and my heart and lungs did not betray me. My brain did not misbehave, did not turn on me and drag me down. For once, my neurosis was not strong enough to manipulate me. I had the upper hand. But it was only because of Ruby.
I realize how much I need her. She has done so much for me, and what have I done for her? Push her away? Hire her only to fire her shortly after? It’s time to treat her the way she deserves, to show my appreciation. I want to help her as she has helped me, but I have no idea how to do that.
Images of the two of us in the back of my Escalade keep filling my brain, blurring my thoughts – the feel of her soft skin, her intoxicating smell, and the sound of her climax. How sweet she tasted. How amazing her luscious mouth felt around me. I’ve already masturbated twice, but as I lay in the bath, I stroke myself again, thinking of her. This is how crazy she makes me. I hope the third time will be the charm and I can finally get some rest.
I make myself a large breakfast, complete with homemade waffles, eggs, bacon, and one of the banana muffins Millie made. I both love and hate weekends. They bring the promise of relaxation. I usually excuse myself from work and exercise and my regimented schedule. I sleep in, take the time to read and catch up on my favourite shows, and call my mother. But I also find weekends extremely lonely. In the past, I’d occasionally have Anita over. I don’t miss Anita. I miss the sex and physical contact, but I don’t itch to chat with her, to tell her about my day and to hear about hers.
I wonder what Ruby is up to. It’s only twelve thirty in the afternoon, and I’m already consumed with thoughts of her. Briefly I consider inviting her for lunch, but it’s her day off. Leave the poor woman alone.
I sit at my desk, lost in thoughts of her. How cruel she was, bringing me to the edge of pleasure then leaving me dangling. I should have been angry, but I couldn’t help but smile.
Miko makes a popping sound and jolts me out of my reverie. He bobs his head from side to side. “Ruby.”
I jerk back in my chair. Sometimes, it’s as if that bird can read my thoughts. I smile at him. “Yes, Ruby. She’s a feisty one.”
“Ruby,” he sings again.
“You like her, don’t you?”
He bobs his head, and I smile at the absurdity of it. Surely he isn’t responding to me, but it seems as though he is.
“You want to listen to some Johnny?” I ask.
And he does it again. I laugh as I walk to my iPod dock and set up some Johnny Cash. The playlist starts us off with the song Jackson. Miko is still. I’m surprised – he usually loves this song.
“Not in the mood for Johnny?”
He doesn’t make a sound but seems to smirk at me.
On a whim, I stick the Keith Urban CD into my old player, and as the first song starts, I turn to see him bobbing along to the music. I can’t help but laugh. How can such a funny little creature bring me so much joy? I can only imagine what it would be like to have children. Then a vision of Ruby hits me, beautiful as always, her stomach swelling with my child. A sweet child with cherubic features and dark hair.
I shake my head. “Miko, I’m in trouble. There’s a girl, and all I can think about is her. I have no clue what to do. What should I do? I want to do something special for her, something to thank her.”
I mull over the possibilities. I know for a fact that her birthday is coming up. She’s a Taurus like me. I wonder if two people who share the same astrological sign can be good together. I’ve never really believed in all that stuff; it seems so illogical to me. I wonder if Ruby does.
“You have any ideas, Miko?”
He makes a loud clacking sound. “Ruby!”
I laugh at myself. I’m actually talking to a bird and expecting him to respond. I really do need to get out more. As the sound of her name lingers in my thoughts, I have an idea.
Ruby. I plop down on my desk chair and start up my laptop. Something beautiful. Something special. Something red.
Ruby
Amber stands at the other end of the room, holding two corners of a crisp red sheet. I hold my own corners. We stretch our arms and draw in toward each other, meeting in a sort of dance, a ritual we’ve done a hundred times before. She takes the corners, I grab the bottom of the sheet, and we repeat the dance. We’ve loved folding sheets since we were young. The four of us kids al
l had our various chores, and folding was left to the girls.
“So let me get this straight,” she says. “You’re not fired anymore?”
I don’t really want to talk about it, but I know she won’t let this go. “I… it was a misunderstanding.”
“Really,” she says as she folds the sheet neatly against her chest. “Your boss sounds like a real piece of work. What’s his problem? Maybe Aiden was right when he said he seemed like a jerk.”
I feel as if she’s just slapped me in the face. August is a sweet man. No one understands him. No one even knows him. She has no right. “He’s a nice man. It was just a misunderstanding.”
She grabs another sheet from the laundry basket, and we assume our positions. She cocks a brow when she says, “There’s more to it. You’re not telling me everything.”
“I… I…” I’m speechless. If anyone knows me, it’s Amber. I can’t lie to her. She sees right through me. “I…”
“You what?” she asks, wide-eyed.
“I… he and I…” I really don’t want to tell her this. “We have a… relationship beyond—”
“What?” she exclaims. She is slack-jawed, arms spread wide and holding a half-folded sheet. She looks like a matador facing a charging bull. “You what?”
Still speechless.
“You’re doing it with your boss?” she says a little too loudly.
I inch closer and grab the corners of the sheet. “Shhh… everyone will hear you.”
“You’re doing your boss?” she asks again, in a whisper this time.
“Well…” My heart pounds as my brain fills with delicious images: my legs wrapped around his head, his tongue sliding along the inside of my thigh, his length filling my mouth. I push the images away swiftly. This is certainly not the time for them. I’ll reacquaint myself with them later. “We haven’t slept together yet. We just fooled around and stuff… I’m trying to help him.”
She smiles. “Oh, I’m sure you’re helping him,” she says, a little too snarky for my liking. “What have you done so far?”
“Amber,” I scold as I pull away and leave her the sheet to fold into a perfect square as only she can. “I can’t tell you that. You’re my sister. Why don’t you tell me how Aiden does it for you? I want all the sultry details, sis.”
She laughs. “Fair enough. I get it… you don’t want to talk about it.”
I smile to let her know there are no hard feelings. “Thank you.”
“But…” The word floats between us, and I know I’m in for one of her little talks. “I want to know he’s treating you right.” Yes, there she is again – the overprotective big sister who always looks out for me. I’d expected her. “I want to know he’s not hurting you. We’ll need to meet this man. You need to bring him over for dinner. What does he like to eat?”
“Uh…” That could be a problem, considering I’ve barely been able to get him out onto his own porch and into his own car. It might take a blow job or a “home run” to get him to come here. “H-he doesn’t like to get out much. He’s kind of a recluse… a bit of an introvert.”
She rolls her eyes. “Oh please… he lives across the street for crying out loud, and it’s just dinner. We’re nice people. We’re not monsters. And honestly, I can’t wait to meet this guy.”
She clearly doesn’t understand the gravity of the situation. I want to tell her about it, but I’m afraid she’ll think he’s a complete weirdo before she’s even had a chance to meet him and see how wonderful he is. Unfortunately, I can’t just tell her how amazing he is. She needs to see it with her own eyes.
It’s about seven thirty when Sonia texts me and asks if I want to go out. It’s Saturday night, and I’m twenty-six years old. I should really say, “Hell yeah,” but for one of the first times in my life, I don’t feel like painting the town red. I just want to hang out with Ginger… and think about August.
I scratch Ginger’s neck. She tilts her head up and closes her eyes. She loves it.
“I’ve got it bad, Ginger,” I say. “I’ve got a pretty serious thing for the boss. You would totally get it if you saw him. The man is a work of art.” I stretch next to her on my bed. “I’ve been talking to you a lot lately. It’s pretty sad actually. August talks to his bird, and I talk to my cat. We make quite the pair. But at least his bird talks back. What good are you, Ginger? I’ve seen talking cats on YouTube. I know you can do it.”
She purrs more loudly, as if she’s telling me, “This is all you get, Ruby.”
I just can’t talk about this with anyone. Amber wouldn’t approve of the way I’ve been behaving. Sonia would approve, but I can predict the questions she would ask. Did he make you come? Does he have a big dick? Is he good downtown? She usually asks those questions when I hook up with a guy, and I usually answer them because I don’t really care if she knows. She’s my best friend, and we share everything. Sometimes, I feel as though she’s the only one who doesn’t judge or “mommy” me. Amber and Flynn are always looking out for their little sister, so I can’t really be open with them.
But I don’t want to answer those questions about August. It would be disrespectful to him. God, I really do have it bad for this man. It’s just… what August and I share, it’s too special to go on about it over margaritas at the local dive. But no doubt it would be kind of fun to dish. A huge smile splits my face as I imagine the conversation.
Did he make you come?
Oh yeah. Twice. Once without even touching me. And once in the back of his Escalade.
Does he have a big dick?
Oh yeah. Big, beautiful, and perfect… a work of art really.
Is he good downtown?
A-mazing. The best I’ve ever had.
I throw my pillow over my head. Maybe I should go out after all. I’m going crazy thinking about him. But that’s all I want to do, so I text Sonia back.
Sorry babe. Not in the mood. Just staying in tonight.
She replies with a sad face. I flip my tablet open and do what I always do when I’m bored – I log on to social media. When I click on the message icon, I’m thrilled to see a message from August. I ignore the other two messages and jump right to his.
Hello, Ruby. I hope you are having a great Saturday. Miko kept saying your name today. I think he misses you.
So sweet. My heart warms as I type my reply.
Tell him I miss him too
I went out and stood on the porch again today. It was a beautiful day.
I can’t help but smile as I reply.
I’m so happy you went out today. I stayed in all day… didn’t even notice it was a nice day.
What a shame. Who is the recluse now? :)
:)
What are you up to now?
My heart races as I read his message. What does he have in mind? Does he want to get naughty again? I’m certainly up for it. It seems all I’ve been thinking about is getting naughty with him.
Nothing much. I’m a little bored and restless.
Restless, a.k.a. horny.
Have you been working on your children’s book?
Well, this isn’t going where I wanted it to, but I’m happy just chatting with him.
A little
You promised me you’d finish it. I hold you to that promise. You have an amazing talent. It would be a tragedy to waste it.
I smile.
I will bring two drawings for your approval on Monday, sir.
I want two illustrations every week.
Why, Mr. Hyde, you are very demanding
Yes, I am. And I will have a few other demands when you come in.
So will I.
It should be fun… ;)
Three dots and a wink. My, what could that mean?
I will let you go. You get working on that drawing board. :)
Oh… this is it for tonight. What a tease…
Bye. :)
As crazy as it sounds, I do what he asked. I sit at my drafting table on a Saturday night and pull out my pencils, wa
tercolours, and ink pens. I’d abandoned this project a while ago. After the breakup, I just didn’t feel like doing anything but eat Pringles, read trashy novels, watch bad reality TV with Ginger, and hang out with Sonia in a feeble attempt to distract myself.
As I draw the first stroke, the smooth curve of my main character’s face forms – it’s pure instinct. It flows easily, starting just where I’d left off. And it feels good. What a rush. I’d forgotten how amazing it is to see a picture appearing before my eyes, created by my own hands. I’m giddy as I mix the colours, trying to achieve just the right hue. Wilcox the Mouse always wears the same blue shirt, and his best friend, Molly, sports the same pink dress with puffy sleeves – they are creatures of habit. I’ve missed these guys. I’m filled with excitement as I bring them to life again. I can’t wait to show these to August.
Ruby
Monday is finally here. I’ve been waiting for it forever. I put on my mother’s pink vintage suit, the one I wore to my interview. I pair it with the black Louboutins – the only Louboutins I own. In fact, they’re the only really nice shoes I own. My other shoes are cute, but they’re not even in the same league as these.
I stare at my reflection as I put on dangling earrings. I’ve worn my hair down because that’s how August likes it. With a slow smile, I wonder what’s in store for the day. I need to come up with another challenge for him. He needs to keep moving forward. And of course, I also need to come up with a delicious reward for him. I bite my lip at the thought. Who knew therapy could be so fun?