While I’m sure the Imperials are mobilizing to pursue us with their own vehicles, I get a feeling it won’t be anytime soon. Only a small squad had spotted us, and it’ll take time for their superiors to mobilize a hunt. By then, we’ll have some measure of distance on them.
But in light of recent news, I fear that the Imperials aren’t the only problems we’ll need to deal with. Our quest has just begun, but there’s an overshadowing issue that needs to be addressed.
Part Three:
Unity
Chapter 30: Sarina
Oasis
OUR BIKES ARE STILL GOING after riding through the night and away from danger. The storm has subsided, but thin clouds still obscure the early morning light. The sand kicked up by the engines sends clouds of filaments into the air behind us, practically masking our escape from those far away.
The sun is barely over the clouded horizon when we finally pause to let the engines cool. Our bikes are parked around a small oasis—the small sanctuary is bordered by a few palm trees and smooth boulders. The freshwater pond at the center is barely twenty meters in diameter, but it’s enough to quench our thirsts. The more natural resources we find, the longer our supplies will last.
I fill my container to the brim and casually rest near the shore of the pond next to a palm tree. My hair is still damp and matted because of the rain. My spear and bowpistol are strapped to the saddle of the bike. Yet, I feel like I should still cling to them in preparation for another attack.
We rest for what seems like an hour and everyone is silent—either due to shock or frustration, I can’t tell. Devin’s injuries have been treated and he’s recovering swiftly. A gauze patch covers his right eye. Abrax is still incapacitated from the bowrifle bolts, but his condition is being treated by Aida. Despite the wounds being cauterized and cleaned, Aida took charge of ensuring his hydration and properly healing the burns. I’m relieved to see that he’s going to be alright.
No one had died due to my mistakes. And that raised a new level of comfort in me. Abrax had warned me about secrets having a cost, but thankfully the cost hadn’t been someone’s life. Being a fugitive from my own home isn’t a terrible penance. Still, I get the feeling that my actions will have some harsher ramifications sooner or later. I can only hope that the others don’t have to pay it.
But now, I owe the others a lot for saving my skin during the escape. That feeling of gratitude begins to shake off some of the misgivings I’ve had about the group. Trust begins to return through the vines of skepticism. And I feel like they deserve to know why I did what I did.
I owe them answers. Why I hid my identity and why I had been abducted in the first place. Shame and fear had prevented me from telling them my heritage before now. All because I’ve never fully accepted my role in Z’hart City. I’ve always been unsure about having that kind of power in the first place. More to the point, I’m afraid of that power and what it might do to myself and those around me. I don’t want people to see me as a divine figure who holds absolute authority—I just want to be seen as a regular person. Responsibility is something I’ve always ran from and it stirs a great shame in me.
I’ve felt the gravity of my inheritance weighing down on me ever since I was a girl—and I hate it. I loathe it. I want nothing more than to escape that crushing destiny and forge my own. But perhaps that’s why I had been afraid to tell them the truth. Because I’m afraid of myself.
Breaking me out of my thoughts, Devin approaches and looks down at me as I remain seated. His expression is neutral, but there’s an icy feeling emanating from him—and his good eye reflects some measure of restrained anger.
“Ey,” he says rather plainly. “You’re not too shaken up about all that excitement are you, your highness?”
I regard him quizzically before saying, “I’m doing better.” I rotate to face him, still unsure what he’s playing at. “It’s not every day you find out that you’ve been set up as a pawn in someone’s plot to overthrow a nation. Or that your own sister is in grave danger for wanting to find you. But I think I’ll be alright.”
“Good. Good.” he replies neutrally, scratching his head. “Then I don’t feel too bad about this.”
In a blur of motion, Devin slams his fist into the tree behind me and curses at the top of his lungs. His large, muscular form towers over me as I shrink in sudden fear. With his fist still against the tree, he bears down on me as if to keep me trapped. Devin wants me to realize that he’s not messing around. And I believe him.
“What the fragging Hells are you doing?” Vivían shouts as she scrambles to get up—the rest of the group follows suite.
“So let’s get something strait, m’lady,” Devin growls, his mouth twisting into a snarl under his goatee. “I think you owe us some fragging answers for the shit that just happened back there! We almost died! And for what? What the Hells are you involved with?”
Before I can get in another word, energy suddenly strikes him in his side. He’s flung a few meters from me as I recoil—sand spewing everywhere. My head snaps to see Tálir standing with his hand outstretched—steam billowing from his fingertips. The look in his eyes is protective and dangerous.
“Back off, Devin!” he calls defensively. “Pick on someone your own size.”
Oh no, I say to myself. This is going to get messy.
Before I can even react, I see Devin spring to his feet. A feral look is on his face and he snarls before charging at Tálir. “Put the toys away and let’s see how great a fighter you really are, pussy!”
Tálir’s eyes narrow to slits as he charges as well. Everyone is in pause, unsure what to do. The two men collide with an impact that nearly dents their armor. Devin is heavier than Tálir and his weight allows him to successfully tackle his opponent. Sand kicks up as they wrestle for control on the ground. Devin lands a punch to Tálir’s left eye, bruising it.
Growling like an animal, Tálir elbows Devin in the jaw and causes him to falter back. A punch to the nose follows up his attack. Blood seeps from Devin’s nostrils. He tackles Tálir again, but this time Devin pins his arms. Two punches are delivered to Tálir’s face. Another follows. Devin won’t stop. His good eye is filled with rage and I fear he might beat Tálir to death.
“Stop!” I scream, rushing in to interfere.
Devin gets in one more punch to Tálir’s face before another magic blast hits him in the chest. But it didn’t emanate from Tálir. I look and see Abrax weakly hobbling over to us, his right arm is wrapped in a sling. Likely to prevent him from using his right side muscles too much.
“ENOUGH!” he shouts as Tálir arises and prepares to lunge at Devin.
Using his left hand, he fires another burst of energy at his own student. The magic hits Tálir in the back and drives him into the sand face first. Both men have been stunned. Everyone is silent.
Devin arises to one knee, clearly shaking off the effects of the magic blast. “We have been travelling with the missing heiress of Z’hart,” he says weakly. “Doesn’t anyone else find it alarming that she never told us? Now look! She’s on the run again from Imperials and they’ll be looking for her tirelessly! She’s put us all in danger!”
“This quest was already dangerous, you big dumb idiot!” I say aggressively. “You can’t entirely blame me for that. With the convoy, the Roil, and all else—we’ve already been running from peril.”
Vyck walks over to aid his partner. “Sarina, he has a point,” Vyck says warily, giving me a look of mistrust. “That’s a pretty big secret to keep from your companions. We were all convicts, sure. But whatever you’re mixed up in is way above all of our heads.”
Vivían steps close to me. Protectiveness is in her violet eyes. “Sarina didn’t know who to trust!” she says. “She was smart not to reveal her identity to total strangers!”
I can feel the division forming. The group is beginning to fracture. My thoughts fracture as I try to convey why I did what I did. From the beginning, never directly asked me about my
past so I merely lied by omission. However, I know they all deserve answers.
“Sarina doesn’t have to justify herself to you, Devin,” Tálir growls as he rises to one knee. The skin around his left eye is purple and bruised. “As a princess, I’m sure she had a noble reason for keeping her secret.”
“I don’t need you to speak for me, Tálir,” I say perhaps more coldly than I intended. “You don’t know anything about me.” His hazel eyes meet mine and I can see some sense of shameful scorn from him.
I’ll always value his support, but right now it is my duty to come forth. Not his. So I stand firm and bury my remorse for calling him out. His gaze lowers and I can feel his disheartened consternation.
“I am Sarina of House Z’hart,” I say definitively, keeping my head held high. “I am the firstborn daughter of Shiko, the last Lord of the Silver Palm, and the heiress to his throne. As you can all guess, I ran from my responsibilities as the future ruler in favor of freedom. Not exactly a noble reason. But I was happy. I flourished in the bowels of the capital before I was abducted during those riots. I learned that Centum wanted me in captivity as an insurance policy as the Remnant begins their coup for the throne.”
“So when you abandoned us…” Aida says with hidden misgiving. “You chose to seek out the answers on your own? Why not let us help you?”
Abrax gives me a look of disappointment. I can hear his words echo. You’ll only find pain and anger. He was right. I found nothing but more darkness unfolding upon reaching my answers. I still don’t have the full story. But I will not back down. I can’t.
“Because this was my battle to fight,” I say defiantly, stepping forward. I’m at the center, surrounded by them. I pivot to look at each of them.
“It wasn’t your battle,” I continue. “So I took it upon myself to fight it alone. You all didn’t owe me anything.”
Remus adopts a concerned look but remains silent. Aida speaks for him, “We wanted to know about what happened that night just as much as you!” She reflects vexation and her dark eyes seem outraged. “The Remnant didn’t just target you! All of us were captured that night!”
Vyck nods his head and affirms, “Imperials took us in just for defending ourselves. Sure, we were dangerously lethal. But they attacked us first just because we were in the vicinity.”
To my surprise, even Vivían agrees with them. “They arrested me for trying to help some kids flee the carnage. I hate to admit it, but they’re right. You weren’t the only one they unjustly took that night.”
But her attitude still remains protective of me as she addresses Abrax. “What do you think, old man?”
Abrax stares at me weakly before saying, “I already had a feeling who Sarina was. Therefore, I’m not too cut up about it. She had ample reason for concealing her identity.”
“What?” the others say simultaneously. I’m not entirely surprised, Abrax always seemed to treat me differently than the others.
“How in all the Hells did you figure that out about her?” Tálir demands angrily. “And why didn’t you tell us?”
Abrax shrugs his good shoulder. “I’m old and I know things,” he says gruffly. “Her posture, her bearing, the news of her first disappearance over a year ago… Things started to add up. You all were just too oblivious to catch it. As for why I didn’t share, it wasn’t my place to tell you of her identity. It was her responsibility.”
“That still doesn’t excuse her from seeking out answers on her own,” Aida demands, her fists clenched. “We all deserve to know why we were captured! Remus and I were at that gala too!”
“Wait, if you were running from your title as Z’hart’s heiress,” Vivían points out, “why did you attend a party full of nobles?”
Blushing from indignation and embarrassment, I reply, “The public only saw me on rare occasions. Since I was mainly brewing ale behind the bar, I hoped no one would recognize me.”
“That’s stupid,” Vivían comments. “What kind of person would —”
“Act recklessly?” Aida points out.
Tálir scoffs as he fumes with animosity while I see Devin scowl. Everything seems as if it’s ripping apart. I can feel an emptiness starting to form in my stomach. Not because they are wrong, but because they’re right. My actions have been selfish and stupid. I should’ve realized we all had been affected by the riots. Even Tálir had been a casualty. But what they don’t understand is that I had been the true causality. The linchpin for the events. All because I had been irresponsible. So I had felt it was my job alone to undo the damage I’d caused.
“The only difference is…” I say as my frustration starts to rise. “The Remnant started all of this because of me. If I hadn’t been on the run, none of you would’ve been victims of the riots. It’s my fault, so I need to be the one to fix it! None of you are royalty, so you cannot understand where I’m coming from!”
Their eyes stare into my soul. No one says anything and I feel a chill run down my spine. I can see the resentment in their eyes. Swearing under my breath, I realize I shouldn’t have elevated myself with that declaration. It makes it seem like they’re beneath me even though they’re not. I feel hollow, like my words are rotting me from the core.
“Ah yes,” Devin sneers; his eye reflects betrayal. “Because how could we, a simple band of outlaws, ever be considered in the same breath as the heiress of Z’hart. Pardon me, your highness. We’re mere peasants beneath your gaze.”
“That’s not what I—”
“Save it, Sarina,” Devin interrupts coldly. “We may be just commoners to you. But we at least tried to help you. We tried to be equals.”
Vyck says nothing as he stands next to Devin. Vivían’s face reflects worry even as Vyck gives her a sympathetic shrug.
“I knew it was fragging stupid to go on this quest,” Devin continues, turning his back to me. “Well… You can count us out. We’re done.”
The pair begins to walk off into the distance. My chest feels heavy; the sense of loss is starting to spread more. Everyone else also begins to depart silently. Vivían and Remus are the only ones to offer some measure of comfort. They give me looks of understanding, but say nothing.
Tálir’s look is the one that makes me feel truly empty. After everything I’d said, he looks at me with a measure of dark defeat—like I’ve shattered a piece of his heart. Perhaps I did, inadvertently. He stands and says nothing, electing to wander off like the others. Only Abrax remains.
I turn to face him as he leans against the palm tree. His face is haggard and tired. “It’s like I said, Sarina,” he comments rather dryly. “You’d only find pain and anger if you chose this path.”
Indignation boils inside of me. I give him a hooded gaze, my eyes piercing into his. “You of all people should understand why I did this,” I hiss quietly. “The high supreme Maven master. I figured you’d understand the sacrifice I was trying to make!”
Abrax’s face scrunches as he leans away from the tree and starts limping back to his cot. “Did you sacrifice for them?” he asks cryptically. “Or where you sacrificing for yourself?”
Chapter 31: Sarina
A Part of You
THRUST. THRUST. JAB. SWIPE. Parry. Jab. Swipe. Parry.
Sweat drips down my face as I pivot and move, swigging and jabbing my spear at unseen enemies. The morning is still early, but it’s humid and warm—likely attributed to the nearby oases. Silver clouds obscure the sun. It has been a while since I’ve been alone, not surrounded by anyone. It’s relaxing in a sense, to collect my thoughts as I train.
Thrust. Jab. Swipe. Flourish. Thrust. Parry.
Along the sandy bank of an oasis, I take dance-like steps along its perimeter as I practice. Dunes of pale sand rise along my flanks and a small swamp lies nearly a kilometer to the east. Flies swarm around me even as I continue to move.
I kick up sand as I continue to pivot and my arms begin to grow tired. Some of the others are napping after riding all night. I’ve chosen to remain awake an
d train with the spear. It’s my weapon of choice after all, so I have elected to master its use. Besides, my last few fights hadn’t gone exactly swimmingly. Far from our campsite, I train to become comfortable with the spear’s weight and length. Only garbed in a sleeveless tunic, short pants, and boots, I press my routine be without concern of cleanliness.
Thrust. Thrust. Parry. Swipe. Flourish. Spin. Jab. Thrust.
I can still hear Abrax’s words echo in my mind. Had I sacrificed for selfish reasons back in Z’hart City? Perhaps he had been right. My motives were purely based around finding answers to my problems, not the group’s. Shame contorts the features in my face as I make an emotional thrust forward.
All this time, I thought I had been trying to protect the group by fighting alone. But in reality, I had only been concerned with myself. They wanted to be there with me, to solve this alongside me. But my lack of trust and irresponsibility got the better of me. What a shocker.
The Maven Knight (The Maven Knight Trilogy Book 1) Page 24