by Mysti Parker
Then she was in his arms again, more sun, fluorescent lights. What little air she captured was tainted with the smell of disinfectant, plastic flowers, and metal. It seemed too familiar. She'd arrived there like this before, long ago, with frantic parents instead of the man she loved.
"Help her!" Jesse demanded.
She landed on a lumpy bed. Something covered her mouth and nose. It was tight and smelled like plastic. God, no, please! I can't breathe! Her eyes popped wide open. Blurry faces hovered. Her shirt was ripped open. Cold things stuck on her chest. She gasped for air and found some. It flowed into her mouth and lungs. She willed her gasps into long, filling breaths. Someone mentioned heart attack. She was too young for that, wasn't she?
"You'll have to wait outside," a woman said.
"Leigh." Jesse's face hovered.
She wanted to touch him, but he squeezed her hand instead. "You're gonna be okay. I'll call your mom and dad. Just breathe, okay? Keep breathing."
She nodded, or thought she did, and then her hand was empty. But she closed her eyes and did as Jesse asked. Just breathe.
Chapter Twenty-One
Leaving her in there was about the hardest thing Jesse had done in his life. He called Leigh's dad at the dealership, hoping Roscoe could remain calm enough to pick her mom up from work and not scare her to death.
He answered on the second ring. "Hello? Roscoe here. What can I do to get you into a new car today?"
Jesse steeled himself, reverting to the straightforward tone he used for other such calls. "Hi, Roscoe, this is Deputy Maddox. Your daughter's in the ER. Possible heart attack, but it's too early to tell. Can you get her mother and get down here?"
A heavy two seconds of silence. Then, "Is she going to be okay? Please tell me she'll be okay."
"She's breathing. They're working on her now." His voice broke. "Hurry, but drive safe."
"I'm leaving now." Another pause. "If you can, tell her we'll be there and we love her."
Jesse could only nod as the call ended. He dropped into a hard seat in the waiting area. He'd been fighting to stay calm, but now he couldn't hold back the emotion. It spilled out in deep, heavy sobs. He covered his face with both hands. People were staring. He could feel it. He was supposed to be strong and in control when he wore this uniform, but he had come dangerously close to losing the first woman he truly loved. And might still lose her.
It took a minute or two, but he finally released enough emotion to stop crying like a baby. A box of tissues sat haphazardly on a stack of ragged Sports Illustrated magazines on the table across from him. He grabbed a few and dried his face. Figured that this waiting room would have magazines that suited his taste now that he didn't feel like looking at them. Then realized something else.
He’d forgotten his damn hat in her office again.
****
“I’m fine, Mum,” Leigh said for the fiftieth time. “And Dad.”
Roscoe stood on the right side of her bed in the ER, hands deep in his pockets, his face like stone. That’s how he showed his worry. Her mum, on the other hand, let it all out with copious amounts of tears. She flanked Leigh’s left. Mother and father bears couldn’t be more vigilant than these two.
Jo dabbed her cheek with a tissue. “I know, I know. It just scared me, that’s all.”
A man stepped around the corner where the curtain stood open. “You’re not the only one.”
Leigh sat up higher at the sound of his voice. “Jesse?”
“Yeah.” He reached up as though to remove his nonexistent hat then stuck his hand in his pocket and came closer.
Jo walked right up and hugged him tight. Jesse, looking bashful, hugged her with one arm.
Roscoe came around and stuck out his hand. Jesse accepted his firm shake.
“You saved my daughter’s life,” Roscoe said, barely hiding the quiver in his voice. “How can we repay you?”
Jesse shook his head. “No payment necessary. I was doing my job.”
“You’re too humble,” Jo said, kissing his cheek before finally letting him go. “She wouldn’t be here if you hadn’t responded to her text.”
Roscoe added, “Or if you hadn’t cared enough to tell her to text you in the first place. She didn’t have time to call 911. And that no-account boss of hers—”
Leigh cleared her throat. “Hello? I’m still here. I can speak for myself.”
Jo came over and kissed her daughter’s forehead. Then she took Roscoe’s arm. “Let’s go grab some coffee.”
“But I already—” At his wife’s nod toward Jesse, he took his hands from his pockets. His scrutinizing gaze bounced from Jesse to Leigh. “Sure, coffee sounds good.”
“We won’t be long, Leelee.” Jo looked back over her shoulder at Leigh and winked as she walked out with Roscoe, closing the curtain behind them.
Leigh let her head fall back on the pillow. “They were stressing me out.”
“They were worried.” Jesse hesitated then came over to her bedside.
“I know.”
His eyes were red, his face streaked with very faint lines. He'd been crying. She wanted to hug him more than anything. But hooked up to all this equipment, she'd probably tangle him up in it.
“If I’d known you were coming, I’d have worn something nice.” She gestured to her ugly hospital gown.
Jesse’s smile warmed the chilly room. “You’d be pretty in a paper bag.”
“This gown feels like a paper bag. They’re usually softer than this.”
A moment of silence stretched between them, then Jesse broke it. “What did the doctor say?”
“Panic attack.” Leigh closed her eyes and shook her head. “No sign of a heart attack, thankfully. They’re just keeping me here for a while for observation. Is Mitch behind bars?”
“Yeah, he won’t be hurting you or anyone again.”
She took his hand and squeezed it. “Thank you. It seems a paltry thing to say to someone who’s saved your life, but I have no other words right now.”
“You don’t need any.” He embraced her hand in both of his and stroked her knuckles with his thumb.
She smiled and sighed, more relaxed than she’d felt all day.
“I’d love to pick up where we left off when you feel up to it.”
“Me too. That pond of yours is calling me.”
“I’m thinking roasted hot dogs and marshmallows.”
“My thoughts exactly, and then…whatever.”
He chuckled. “We can take our time. No pressure.”
The attending physician’s shadow darkened the curtain. He spoke in his abrupt, gotta-get-to-the-next-poor-sucker voice. “Her EKG is normal, blood pressure great, no pain. She can go home now. Just make sure she takes it easy for a couple of days. She should be fine.”
Her mom answered, her voice a bit hesitant. “Okay, thanks, doctor.”
Leigh and Jesse shared a smile. Her parents hadn’t gone for coffee. They’d been right outside the whole time, the buggers. Leigh reluctantly withdrew her hand from Jesse’s. She’d never had a boyfriend and certainly no PDAs around her parents. She didn’t know how they’d feel about it, and didn’t feel like testing it yet.
A few seconds later, Jo poked her head in with a guilty grin. “Hey, Leelee, you can go home now.”
“I heard.”
A nurse breezed in and unhooked Leigh from all the EKG marionette wires. Leigh didn’t miss her sidelong glance and passing smile at Jesse. An unreasonable urge to tell the nurse to piss off came over Leigh. What was that? Jealousy? She took deep breaths. It would do her no good to get all riled up. She’d rather be anywhere but this stinking hospital.
The nurse left and Jo and Roscoe came back through the curtain.
Jo exhaled as though she’d been holding it until she knew Leigh was in the clear. “You need help getting dressed?”
“No, I got this, Mum.”
“Okay. We’ll step out while you get dressed.”
Jesse took that as his cue. “
See you outside.”
“Wait.” She pointed to the chair where her clothes sat in a neat pile. Jesse’s hat lay on top of them. “You left something.”
He threw her a bashful grin then stepped around the bed and retrieved it. “How did you get this here? You didn't have to worry about it.”
“I didn't. The sheriff did. Your uniform’s not complete without it.” She added quietly, “It’s really hot on you.”
With a wide smile that did all kinds of good things to his face, he plopped the hat on his head, tipped it at her, and stepped through the curtain.
Leigh slipped into her slacks and blouse, which still had a spot of her blood on it. This whole day seemed surreal, like a drug-induced hallucination. The fear she’d felt with a knife at her throat still festered, but she had to push it down. She wouldn’t stay another minute in a hospital if she could help it. Then again, going home meant resting in the room that had been her near-death chamber. Back to the same window she had stared longingly out on warm summer days as the neighborhood kids rode their bikes and walked their dogs and rollerbladed on the sidewalk. Back to the same ceiling with the same water spots she’d focused on when wave after wave of nausea hit. And the same dresser where she’d sat in front of her mirror and cried at the sight of her hair falling out in clumps.
Deep breaths. She didn’t have to stay in her room now. She could rest on the couch or the recliner where her mom had held her when the pain of her hysterectomy was too much to bear. At that age, she hadn’t fully understood the emotional impact she would have years later. Truth was, everywhere she went held memories she couldn’t escape from. She sat on the bed to slip on her shoes and willed the tears to stay put. She’d cried enough of them.
Determined to suck it up and move on with life, she stood, squared her shoulders, and slid the curtain back. A nurse waited outside with a wheelchair and beside her, Jesse waited with a bouquet of flowers.
“Oh.” Clearly, her vocabulary had also suffered from the day’s events.
He smiled and handed them to her. “Your ride awaits.”
She took them and sniffed the sweet pink roses. “Thanks.”
“My pleasure.”
“Where’s Mum and Dad?”
“Out in the lobby.”
“Oh.” Back to the one-word utterances. Lovely. She could do better. “I can walk, you know.”
“Sorry, it’s hospital policy,” the nurse said without feeling. She’d probably repeated the same phrase a million times over.
The nurse wheeled the chair into the lobby while Jesse walked beside Leigh. He scanned the area as though watching for any more threats. Ever the vigilant lawman. God love him.
Jo stood from a vinyl-padded seat among a row of identical ones, a folded magazine in her hand. She dropped it on the table and looked relieved as the nurse wheeled Leigh up to her. Roscoe stood slowly, one hand on his lower back. Those chairs weren’t known for their comfort, even though people often had to wait hours in them for good news or bad.
The nurse pushed Leigh out the automatic sliding door. “I’ll need someone to pull a car around so she can get in from here.”
Roscoe pulled his keys from his pocket, but Jo laid a hand on his arm and bent closer to Leigh.
“Leelee,” she said, using her talking-to-Leigh-at-nine-years-old voice. “It’s such a nice day out here. Would you feel up to going to Jesse’s place for a while to relax out back?”
“Uh…” Leigh glanced up, her gaze darting from Roscoe, who didn’t look so sure about this, to Jo, who looked way too enthused, and then Jesse, who smiled bashfully, arms crossed and head down. “I don’t know… I mean, I feel fine but Jesse may have to get back to work.”
“No,” he answered. “I’m off duty. It’s almost six o’clock.”
Had it really been that long? “I don’t want to put you and your grandfather out.”
“You wouldn’t be. Pa’s at the senior center for Bingo and banana pudding night. He’ll be gone until the group van drops him off at ten thirty.”
“They party hard, huh?” Leigh chuckled.
“See? Perfect.” Jo sounded happy about this. What was up with that?
The nurse cleared her throat. “Can someone just get a vehicle, please? You can go wherever you want, but you can’t stay here. I have rounds.”
“Great, then. It’s settled. Leigh, go relax at Jesse’s for a while.” Jo leaned down and kissed Leigh’s cheek. “Love you, Leelee,” she whispered. “Don’t be afraid to relax and enjoy yourself. You need that.” She glanced at Jesse, smiled, and took Roscoe’s hand, dragging him through the parking lot.
"Take care of my girl!" he called over his shoulder.
"Yes, sir!" Jesse called back.
When had her overprotective mother ever encouraged her to be alone with a guy? Never. When had she not left names and numbers in case of emergency with strict orders to not stay out too late? Never. Jo knew how Leigh felt about Jesse, obviously. Mums always knew. But why couldn’t Leigh be sure about her own feelings? In a way, the thought of being alone with Jesse and this attraction between them scared her almost as much as her near-death experience. Both things involved the unknown.
“I guess I’ll get the car, then.” Jesse jogged just two spaces away to his police car, which sat diagonally in the space as though he’d slid in on two wheels.
Leigh hid her smile behind the rose bouquet.
Jesse pulled right up to the entrance and opened the front passenger door while the nurse pushed the wheelchair close to the car. Leigh jumped up, ready to get away from that four-wheeled invalid chair.
“Get some rest,” the nurse said blandly, then wheeled the chair back to the hospital.
Jesse held Leigh's hand as he helped her get seated. “Feeling okay?”
“Yeah. But aren’t I supposed to ride in the back being a civilian and all?” She crossed her arms, leaning to the right. She didn’t want to accidentally press one of the buttons on the console in case it put the car in self-destruct mode or something.
He smiled and winked. “I’m off duty. I think the sheriff will let me by on this one.”
Warmth climbed up her cheeks. She nodded. “Okay.”
He got in the car, this man who had no reason to care about her so much. This man who’d changed from dreadful to wonderful. This man who’d saved her life.
Leigh’s tears finally made their appearance before the car even left the parking lot. She thought—no, hoped—she could hold them back until she was tucked away in her room where only her parents would hear. Crying had been a common sound in their house for years. But everything welled up at once and spilled over—frustration about her job, anger at her boss, anger at herself for putting up with him, the terror of knowing she had been just one knife stroke away from death. Ironic, really. She’d expected to die of recurring cancer, had prepared herself for it with a will and everything. Not that she had much to leave behind.
She tried to keep it quiet. Jesse hadn’t said a word, probably realizing she didn’t want to talk about what happened yet. But he looked straight at her, with so much compassion in his eyes, it pushed her sobbing into full gear. Leigh covered her face with both hands and wept. Wept harder from showing such weakness in front of such a strong man.
Jesse put the car in reverse and slowly backed up, then turned left and pulled into an empty parking space. He reached over her to the glove compartment, opened it, and pulled out a package of tissues. Setting them gently on her lap, he put his hand on her shoulder and softly massaged it.
When the crying subsided enough that she no longer wailed, Leigh fumbled with the tissues until she finally pulled one out, or thought she did. What she held, instead, was only the tattered corner of a tissue. She sniffed, staring at it. “That’s not going to do me much good, now is it?”
One corner of Jesse’s mouth curved up. “Probably not. But at least you’re smiling now.”
He pulled a whole tissue out for her. She dabbed her eyes with it, wiped
her nose, and let her head sink back onto the headrest.
“Do you want to talk?”
She sniffed again, took a deep breath, and shook her head. “Not here. I’d rather sit by the pond.”
“As you wish.” He started the car and backed out of the space.
“I love that movie.”
“Hmm?”
“The Princess Bride. As you wish is a line from that.”
“Oh. Never seen it.” He pulled out of the parking lot and finally, they were on the highway.
Leigh stared wide-eyed at him. “We have to rectify that as soon as possible.”
“Deal.”
Chapter Twenty-Two
The pond was as serene as it had been the last time Leigh had visited. She sat on the dock and skimmed the water with her toes while Jesse went inside to change clothes. Minnows schooled under her feet. She held still and let them nibble on her toes. The tickling sensation brought a smile to her face. If things had turned out differently earlier today, she wouldn’t be sitting here now. She wouldn’t be with this incredible man who surprised her more every day with his change of character.
Footsteps echoed behind her on the dock. Startled, she turned around then breathed a sigh of relief.
“Just me,” Jesse said. “Sorry, I should have said something to alert you.”
“It’s okay.”
He held a tray with two glasses of iced tea and two sandwiches with chips. Man, did that look good. Leigh’s stomach rumbled. Hunger hadn’t registered until now. He lowered himself carefully to sit beside her on the dock and set the tray between them.
“I hope you like bologna and cheese. That’s about all I have right now. I’d have gotten some groceries had I known…” His voice trailed off, probably because he didn’t want to remind her of the reason she was here.
“I’ll eat anything right now. I’m starving.” She picked up a sandwich and took a bite. “Thank you,” she added around her mouthful of bologna.
Jesse chuckled. “No problem.”
They ate in comfortable silence for a while until the sandwiches and chips were nothing but crumbs on their plates. Jo had always said you know it’s a good sign when you can simply sit quietly with a man and still enjoy each other’s company. Leigh hoped her mum was right. But as she finished her last drink of sweet tea, the ice cubes rattled in the glass. It signaled the end of silence and the need to strike up conversation.