Stricken Trust (Stricken Rock)

by Logsdon, S. K.

  I’m reading my nook on this expensive couch. Wuthering Heights for the sixth time. I love this book. I’m relaxing in a blue dress that’s not maternity but fits well over my bump. Makes me look fat, but everything does. At least my ass hasn’t earned its own zip code yet.

  Ding-dong-ding-dong

  Stacy’s here!

  I put my nook on the coffee table and skip like a little girl to the door, so excited to see my best friend. I unlock the two dead bolts and open it up.

  “Stacy!!!” I scream, jumping up and down excited. He drops his bag on the ground. “Emily!” he screams back just as enthusiastic and grabs me up into his beautiful arms and we hug. I kiss his cheek over and over and over. In quick chicken pecks. Damn, I’ve missed him. I know we’re like stupid teenage girls. But I love Stacy. He’s great.

  He lets me go and takes a step back.

  “Look at you woman, I haven’t seen you in what? A week and you’ve grown.” He stares at my belly.

  “Yep, fat artichokes.” I pat my tummy and glance around him and there’s Kyle. “Hi Kyle,” I smile and walk around Stacy and wrap my arms around his neck and pull him into an awkward hug. He hugs me back, it’s loose but not as weird as I anticipated. Yah! Maybe he doesn’t hate me as much after all.

  “Aw, look at you two. My two favorite people hugging... Adorable,” Stacy chimes in. I think he’s sounding gayer and gayer every day. My sweet best friend. I can’t stop smiling. It’s one of those perma-grins that I know will eventually hurt. But I’m so stinking excited to spend the week with my BFF.

  I pull away from Kyle and chuckle. “Yep, Stace. We’re practically painting each other’s toe nails and braiding each other’s hair.”

  “Hey, don’t hate Emily, I paint your toes and help with your hair.”

  I smack him on the arm lovingly, roll my eyes and reach down to snatch up his bag to carry it in for him.

  “Oh no you don’t, my pregnant lady.” James scolds, a towel draped around his sweaty neck. Fuck! He’s hot. He moseys outside onto the porch and greets the men with a nod. “You do not carry luggage. Don’t make me call the doctor and tell her.” He warns with a sweet smile. I roll my eyes.

  “I’m not an invalid James.” I wag my finger at him.

  “Don’t you give me that. Get your booty in the house and out of this cold. I don’t need to be fixing you chicken noodle soup in the next couple of days because you forgot to put on a coat.”

  “Says the pot calling the kettle black,” I sass and check out his tank, gym shorts and towel. Making it obvious I’m scrutinizing his gear.

  He smacks my ass hard with a crack and I yip. “Get that booty in the house my pregnant lady. I’m a grown man who’s not twenty weeks pregnant with a son and a daughter.”

  I listen. Stacy laughs and James grabs Stacy’s bag, carrying it into the house to his and Kyle’s bedroom. It’s the only one on the first floor.

  James is extra saucy today. He usually picks on me. But damn, he’s on fire today. Maybe he’s revved up, post workout. I sit back on the couch and all three men re-join me.

  “So, this place rocks.” Stacy says dropping down on the couch across from me, running his gaze over the room. I miss him that far away. I want some Stacy cuddle time. But I know it’s all about Kyle now. Who sits down next to him, placing his hand on this partner’s knee. How cute is that? James and his sweatiness plops beside me. The couch crunches at his force.

  “I love this place. I think I could live here forever. It would be an amazing place to raise a family,” I add.

  Pivoting my body, I see James using the towel to dry off his damp chest and sweat soaked hair. It makes the blackness glisten in this lighting. I really should stop looking at him. He’s gorgeous. Post workout, his face shines with sweat and is slightly flush. His arm muscles appear larger and exceptionally delectable. He’s not a body builder but if he worked out a lot and used massive amounts of supplements, he could be. The way he is now is built but thick. Which makes me feel even smaller around him than I do Johnathan because he’s larger.

  “Yeah, it’s a great place Em, I think we should take a vacation up here every year with the twins,” Stace comments.

  “That sounds like a great idea Stace.” I smile. “So how’s the boyfriend-boyfriend thing coming along?” I ask them both, truly curious.

  James relaxes on the couch and stretches his arms across the top. His forearm resting behind my head. And he kicks a foot up onto his knee wearing his black workout shoes. They are the only shoes I see him wear other than his leather boots. No sandals or slippers. And he only ever wears white socks. Crew socks with his boots and ankles with his workout gear. Most if not all of his clothing consists of black. He wears black cargo pants, gray cargo pants and occasionally dark denim jeans. His workout clothes are the same, always dark colors. I’ve never seen him in a light blue shirt or anything with a collar. Very manly clothes and anytime we wears long sleeves they are slouched up his forearms like the cuffs bug the shit out of his wrists or something. But it’s super sexy when he does it. Ok, I have to stop thinking of James that way. He’s attractive Em, not sexy. He’s your bodyguard, he’s your bodyguard. Time to keep that in mind. Putting it on a loop in my brain. Bodyguard…. Bodyguard. That helps. Woo, thank the lord.

  “Emily? Emily?” Stace says.

  I look at him and he’s face is dusted with confusion.

  “Huh?”

  “You were out of it for a second,” Stacy says.

  Shit! I zoned out. That’s not good. I only zone out when I’m thinking too much. Or when I’m stressed. Not good, not good at all.

  “Sorry, what were you saying?”

  “I was saying. Things with Kyle and I have been great.”

  “That’s wonderful. I’m glad you two are finally together. It’s about damn time.” I chuckle anxiously, reeling myself back into the present.

  “Hey babe I think I’m going to go take a shower and rest a bit,” Kyle says to Stacy.

  “No problem. I’ll hang with Em, you go rest and if you need anything I’ll be around.” Stacy answers back and pecks him quickly on the lips. Kyle stands and waves us goodbye. I wave back with a smile. I hope this tension I can feel between us dies down by the end of the week.

  “Well since Kyle’s gone. I think I’ll retire too. You two have fun,” James says, standing to leave. “But, Stacy please make sure my pregnant lady doesn’t pick up anything too heavy or do anything she’s not allowed to. She thinks she’s Xena and I have to walk behind her everywhere to make sure she’s being good.”

  “You do not,” I rebuke, frowning.

  He kneels in front of me.

  “Come here.” He waves me over and I scoot forward on the couch my legs open so he fits between them.

  He removes the sweaty towel from around his thick neck and tosses onto the floor beside him. Reaching out he caresses the sides of my belly, tilting his head down so his lips are but an inch from touching the babies.

  “You two need to make sure mommy stops being a pain. She thinks she’s superwoman all the time. Tell her that Papa Bear is just doing his job to help take care of her,” he whispers to them then looks up into my eyes and locks them there. “Mama needs to let Papa Bear do his job and not only protect her but her cubs.” His eyes are boring into mine with passion and love. “This bodyguard loves his family. And he will protect them always. Including from Mama Bear when she’s being a pain, thinking she can do things that are no longer safe.”

  I can’t believe James is speaking to me like this. He’s Papa Bear? As in my papa? Or a surrogate dad to the twins? I like the sound of it. It fits him well. Damn, it’s confusing but he’s so handsome and his eyes are so beautiful. I can’t believe I’ve ever gotten this lucky to have such an amazing man in my life. James is my protector. Hired or not. He goes above and beyond the call of duty for us three and for that, I will always love him.

  My heart is thumping in my chest. I take in a long deep breath. My face is flus
h.

  “Does Mama Bear understand?” he asks me.

  I nod.

  “Mama Bear needs to tell me,” he gently says, his voice sensuously low.

  My skin is on fire right now. I think he just woke up the whore. That kind of talk makes my pussy wet. Fuck! I hate this.

  “I understand Papa Bear. I will be good. I won’t carry luggage. Or heavy things upstairs. I will try. I’m sorry,” I whisper in a pout. He reaches up and fingers my bottom lip.

  Damn! The contact of his skin on mine sparks and my core is pulsating. He holds is finger there. I close my eyes and savor his warmth on my lip. I know it’s not his mouth. But it’s soothing and sexy all at the same time.

  He’s my bodyguard, he’s my bodyguard. Stop Em. Stop. I repeat. My chest heaving deep breaths through my nose.

  He releases me from his hold and bends his face down and kisses my belly two times each side. Then he leaves and goes upstairs. I look over to Stacy; his eyes are wide.

  “Whoa!” He exclaims fanning his face with his hand. “That was hot.”

  “No…no, it wasn’t,” I correct with a near snarl.

  “Oh, yes it was. I felt the temperature rise like ten degrees up in here. Holy shit Em. You have a thing for your bodyguard don’t you?”

  I crinkle my brow and purse my lips. “No, I do not.”

  “Then it’s something. But it’s hot as hell in here. Woo-wee. Passion is flying high.” He fans his face again with gusto, smiling naughtily ear to ear.

  I giggle. “You’re crazy, Stace. It’s probably that hot and horny cock between your legs.”

  “Yep, my cock is hot and horny. So, can we go for a walk? It’s beautiful outside. I think James would be okay with that. Oh, what’s he calling himself these days? Papa Bear? Ok, well I think that should be on his approved list of activities.”

  “Yeah I’ll throw on a coat and some leggings and we can head out.” I say, getting up off the couch. “I’ll meet you down by the door in a minute.”

  I hit the stairs and take them carefully up. I want to abide by James’s rules. I open our bedroom door. Shit! He’s standing in the middle of our bedroom floor wrapped only in a towel. His hair damp from a shower. And his chest is glistening with little beads of water drops. I wonder what they taste like off his skin? Oh, shit! No… no… I don’t. I don’t care. I shake my head.

  “Sorry. I am putting on a coat and a pair of leggings. Stacy and I are going for a walk outside. Is that alright?”

  “Yes, that’s fine. Put on some cloth mittens too. It’s a little chilly out.”

  Why does it matter if I wear that or not? I don’t get it. He runs outside in shorts and a tank and I have to wear a fucking parka and a set of gloves. This is stupid. I’m not five anymore.

  “Why is it you get to help take care of me? Then I want to go for a walk and you tell me I can go but I have to wear mittens. Yet, you’re allowed to wear practically nothing outside. It’s not fair. I get that you don’t want me lifting a lot of stuff. But damn James. You might be old enough to be my dad but you’re not my dad, you’re my bodyguard. Remember? ” I blurt, frustrated. Oh, shit I probably should have been nicer. That didn’t come out as sweet as I wanted.

  He doesn’t say a word and he takes a step closer. Oh fuck! He’s in a towel. I am keenly aware that he is too close and too naked. This is not good. Don’t come any closer, James. Just keep the ten feet away that’s a safe distance. My pussy won’t thump harder.

  He takes another step.

  “James please stop coming closer,” I plead and my voice cracks. Shit, real smooth Em. “You’re not wearing any clothes. Get dressed and then you can say whatever it is you want.”

  He takes another step. Damn he’s fine. Fuck! No. He’s not. He’s your bodyguard, Em. Just a man who protects you. Not a hot man with a gorgeous cock. Oh fuck stop thinking about his cock.

  I swallow hard.

  “I’m coming to my pregnant woman,” He says in a low tone, that sets off a wave of goose bumps over my entire body and I shiver.

  “Why?” I gulp.

  He takes a few long strides and he’s right in front of me. I can feel his heat. Oh shit! My pussy. Oh god. Shut up, you horny bitch. She’s screaming now. Damn-it! She’s begging and pleading me for a release. I hate myself. I hate myself so much right now. This is the worst time ever.

  He places hands on either side of the door, leaning into me.

  “Look at me, Em,” he coaxes lovingly.

  I stare up into his beautiful green brown eyes. And slide down the door onto the ground. I can’t take this. I want to touch his skin and lick it and suck his cock. I don’t care if he’s my bodyguard or forty three. This isn’t good. I close my eyes and try to forget about who’s in front of me. Everything was fine until we came here. I slept in bed with him, we cuddled, and we had so much fun together. I’ve always found him attractive. But then I have to go and walk in on seeing him naked. Ruining our friendship forever. That cock of his ruined it. I ruined it. Fuck, I’m going to cry. Damn me! Damn this all. Stupid hormones.

  He crouches down. I can’t look at him. He’s too beautiful. Johnathan is sexy and beautiful too but totally different. James is gentle and kind and sweet. He’s warms you from the inside out and makes you want to love him and feel him down inside of his soul. It’s slow and romantic, kind of like our cuddling. Johnathan exudes passion and raw animalism. Which is better? I have no idea. But I love them both. Damn, this is wrong! I shouldn’t like him. Or either of them.

  “Emily, are you okay?” he asks in a murmur. I can feel him in front of me. Not touching me but so close I can feel his warmth and soothing nature.

  “I’m confused.” I slouch with a frown.

  “Talk to me.” He touches my leg. Oh, the warmth of his touch. It’s seeping into my bones and encapsulating me.

  I sigh.

  “I can’t,” I mope

  “Is this because of what happened two days ago? When you saw what you saw?”

  “Yes, but it’s not about it being ugly if that’s what your hinting to. It’s because I liked how you looked before and now that I’ve seen the rest of you, I like it more. I don’t think it would affect me so much if I wasn’t so turned on all the time. But I’m very attracted to you,” I mutter reluctantly.

  “Do you think if you had someone to help with the sexual frustration like Claire did, it would help?”

  I shrug saddened. “I dunno.”

  “I can help you, Emily,” he offers kindly.

  “NO!” I screech. My head shooting up and staring him right in the eyes. I’m astounded. He shouldn’t be offering me this. Never. It’s not right.

  “Why not?” his face is unreadable.

  “You don’t like me that way, for one. I can’t use you, for two. And I don’t want to ruin our friendship, for three.” I blurt out fast.

  “I do too find you attractive. So yes I like you that way. You’re not using me if I offer. I know you’d never ask. And it can’t hurt our friendship. It’s me helping you. Not the other way around.”

  He cannot be serious about this. That sounds ridiculous. If he gets nothing in return that is by definition using someone. Duh!

  “What if I want to have sex?”

  “I can try. I’ll do whatever you want. I can give you oral. Although I’ve not done it in years. I can touch you inside if you want. I can do what Claire did, if you miss it that much. If it’s going to help you and keep you happy, that’s all I want.”

  “Why?” I ask blankly. I’m confused. This is the last thing I ever thought James would offer in a million years.

  “You are in need. I want to service you. It’s simple, really. We can keep it a secret. As long as you don’t tell Stacy or anyone, including Johnathan or Claire. It can be just us and everyone already knows we share a bed. I guess it’s my way of saying thank you for accepting me for who I am. No one has ever done that.”

  I snatch up his face in my hands.

  “James. I lo
ve you. So very much. I can’t use you. If you want to do this because you want to, we can try it. But, you’ve heard me and seen how I get when I’m high on hormones. I can’t promise I won’t ask for this a lot. If you start this, I am going to want it a lot. Just like I use B.O.B or my hand. Anytime you want to be done, you tell me. I can’t run the show. You can. And I know you haven’t touched a woman in five years. So it’s going to be different,” I explain.

  “I know. But I’ve been wanting to ask to help for months. And I know your need is getting worse. I hear the orgasms. I was afraid if you saw my manhood that you’d be scared of me. But now that you are okay with him, I am happy to offer.” He smiles and I pull his mouth down to mine and give him a quick peck on the lips.

  “Okay, Papa Bear. But remember, you can stop whenever it gets uncomfortable.”

  “Yes, Mama Bear. Do you want help now?” he looks down at my open dress.

  I shake my head. “No I am going to go out with Stacy. Maybe tonight.”

  He stands and I can see a huge boner tenting his towel. I guess he’s more excited about this than I expected.

  He drops it down. Oh damn! Look at that hotness! Hell yes!

  I have got to go.

  I quickly grab a pair of leggings out, my red mittens and coat that no longer buttons in the front.

  “Bye my bear. I’ll be back in a while,” I wave when I exit.

  “Bye, Em,” he calls back.

  Chapter Seven

  “So how’s the Kyle thing going?” I ask Stacy. We are finally out into the woods at the back of our cabins property. It’s brisk out but tolerable. I’m glad I put on the mittens that James requested because they are definitely keeping my hands toasty warm. The trees here are tall and mostly bare. Except for a bunch of evergreens that line this well-worn trail.