by Harte, Jenna
“Is this professional or personal?” Jack asked.
Daniel's eyes narrowed. “And what lawyer would you call if I said it was professional?”
Jack's stomach lurched. The man was out for blood. And Jack knew he deserved it.
“It's personal. I'll meet you on the porch.”
Jack followed Daniel outside. They stood in the warm breeze of the May afternoon, overlooking the lush, green, rolling hills of the piedmont.
“A few days ago you came into my office and arrogantly told me how I'd watch Tess marry you. I didn't like it, but I believed it. Funny how wrong you were.”
Jack tried to ignore the twinge of guilt. “Tess is the one who ended things.”
“I can't help but wonder how you could love her the way you say you did and then the minute things get tough, end up at your former lover's hotel room.”
“I should have known you were following her.”
“I wasn't,” Daniel said. “I was checking on the stepson who went to visit her. And minutes after he left her hotel, guess who showed up?”
“I'm not going to discuss my personal life with you.” He hadn't done anything wrong, so why did he feel like he'd betrayed Tess?
“The truth is, when Tess came back from Washington a few years ago, she was a lot like Charles Danforth. Cool and aloof. Then she met you and she began to open up, become the vibrant woman I remembered. I attributed that to you. So imagine my surprise when I learned that when she tried to share her feelings, you dismissed them while defending a woman who quite possibly had her husband killed.”
“It was Tess' decision.” Jack hated how defensive he sounded.
“Ah yes, the if-you-really-love-me-you'll-drop-everything-to-be-with-me test. She failed it when she didn't fall all over herself to be with you. But you knew she'd fail, didn't you? How could she choose to be with you when you were belittling her?”
“I wasn't belittling—”
“You really are an arrogant SOB.”
“I'm not interested in your opinion of me—”
“I guess not.” Daniel cast a look to the house. “You're needed elsewhere.”
The accusing tone hit Jack harder than any punch. When Daniel turned his piercing eyes back on him, Jack wanted to strike out.
“If you'd gone home last night instead of to Liv's hotel, you would have been there when Tess showed up, bags and all.”
The wind flew out of Jack's lungs. He was helpless to refill them. He turned away as he desperately tried to regain his bearing. She'd gone to his house?
“She waited for over an hour. And you know what's really tragic?” Jack stumbled back as Daniel got into his face. “She's telling herself you returned to your place in D.C. even though she doesn’t believe it.”
The bottom fell out. “You can go now,” Jack managed.
“You had more from her than anyone ever had, but it wasn't enough, was it?”
Jack moved away from Daniel. “Enough.”
“While you're at it,” Daniel continued. “You may want to consider that Tess is on to something. I shouldn't tell you this, but there is no way that Charles Danforth was the father of Liv's baby.”
“I said enough!”
Jack saw satisfaction and maybe pity in Daniel's face. “Yes, I guess you're right.”
Daniel climbed into the driver's seat of his car, and pulled away, leaving Jack alone with the knowledge that he'd not only ruined his life, but that he was the biggest jerk and hypocrite on the planet.
~~~~
Jack wasn't sure what to do with the news that Tess had tried to come home last night. He sat in the sunroom, the room that he'd set up just for her when she'd come to live with him after her house fire in February. It was a punishment, he decided, to sit in her space, with her stuff and face what he'd done.
He needed to talk to her, but she wasn't at the hotel nor did she answer her phone. He couldn't blame her, but at the same time, he couldn't fix things if he couldn't find her. He'd called her friends Kate and Brad, but neither knew where she was. He'd even tried Helen, who not surprisingly hung up on him. The only option left was to find Daniel. He grabbed his car keys and headed out the door.
Jack tried not to think about how Tess had come to him, even offered herself to him when she discovered Brad’s infidelity. Was Tess right now finding comfort in Daniel's arms? He shook his head of the thought. This was different, he tried to convince himself.
He pulled up and parked his car outside of Daniel's home. He could barely muster the courage to talk to Daniel. How was he ever going to face Tess? Taking a deep breath, Jack knocked on the door.
“Jack?” Daniel looked surprised, but not guilty.
“Is she here?”
Daniel studied him for what felt like hours. “No.”
“Do you know where she is?”
“Why don't you come in,” Daniel said stepping back. Jack didn't like the sound of that, but he entered to hear what he had to say. Daniel's home was neat and tidy, something Tess would appreciate. Jack wondered how many times Tess had been there. If she'd ever stayed the night. Even if she hadn't, right now, Daniel was probably looking like a safe place to Tess.
“Can I get you a drink?”
“No. Thank you. I need to find Tess. I need your help.”
Daniel snorted. “Right. What makes you think I'll help you?”
“Because you care about Tess and want her to be happy. I can do that.”
“You haven't done such a good job so far,” Daniel said sitting back in a well-worn chair and looking way too smug. Was that why Daniel invited him in? To rub it in? It didn't matter, Jack decided. If it was what he had to endure to get to Tess, he'd suffer through it.
“I know.” Jack sat on the couch, mustering the strength to ask his nemesis for help. “But that will change. I promise you, Daniel. Tess will never be heartbroken because of me again.”
He let Daniel ponder his words. He could see scrutiny and dislike etched on his face. “I'm not sure you deserve another chance.”
“I know I don't, but I'm going to ask her for one with or without your help.”
“So why do you need me?”
“Because she trusts you.”
Daniel studied him again. “I hate that you're the one.”
“I know.” Jack said, as the first glimmer of hope simmered in his heart.
“I don't know where she is.”
“I've been looking for her for hours. She could be missing,” Jack said, as panic began to replace the hope.
“She needs space, Jack. She's trying to decide what her next step is.”
Jack didn't like that Tess was getting ready to make a decision that would undoubtedly not include him. “Do you have an idea where I can look for her?”
“No.”
Jack tried to determine if he was lying. As if he knew what Jack was thinking, Daniel added. “But I know where she'll be tomorrow.”
Chapter Fifteen
Changing rooms at the hotel hadn't done much to squelch the pain of losing Jack. Moving to a different hotel didn't work either. But Tess had known it wouldn't. She'd run away from Washington back to Jefferson Tavern to escape pain and while she'd rebuilt her life, she knew she hadn't left her problems behind. Not until Jack had come back into her life had she dealt with and healed from the hurt and anger of betrayal. Too bad Jack couldn't help her now, she thought, as she rode with Daniel to the airport.
He drove to the private plane area and helped her from the car. She walked alongside Daniel towards a Gulf Stream. “The city isn't paying for this,” she said in surprise.
“No.” Before she could say more he added, “You're not the only one with buckets of money you don't spend.”
She knew Daniel had access to Worthington money, but couldn't understand why he'd put her on a private plane for an investigational trip that was probably a waste of time.
“Just go see what you can find, and then enjoy yourself or think or do whatever women do to put the
mselves back together.”
“I'm not broken.”
“Here's the account Liv gave us of her day in New York,” he said ignoring her comment and handing her a folder. “It also has receipts and phone logs, so you can coordinate them. We've spoken on the phone with most of these sources, but I'd like them to confirm the woman they saw was Liv, so there's a picture of her as well. I've included pictures of Kevin, his wife and Wilson.” When she looked at him questioningly, he shrugged. “You never know. One of them may have helped her.”
“Thank you,” Tess said, not for the folder, but for the effort Daniel was making to help her. “I know this must be costing you a fortune.”
“This is costing me a great deal, but not money.”
“Huh?”
“Do the job and take some time to enjoy yourself. I'll see you tomorrow evening.”
She put the files in her briefcase and started up the steps to the plane.
“Ms. Madison?”
“Yes.”
“I'm Tom Laskin, the pilot. Make yourself comfortable and we'll be on our way in a few minutes.”
“Thank you,” she said as she stowed her belongings and took a seat. She closed her eyes and savored the feel of the soft leather seats. She didn't know much about planes, but she knew this one was special. She saw a kitchenette and dining area. In the back there was a door to another room. A bedroom? The plane was like a Winnebago with wings, only slicker and plusher.
The plane started to move. It picked up speed and she watched as the Jefferson Tavern landscape dropped way. She couldn't stifle her grin.
“Private is the only way to fly,” she said to herself.
“Then you'll fly private whenever you want.”
Tess whipped her head around to the all too familiar voice. Jack moved towards her, looking tentative, unsure and more than a little green. He glanced out the window then quickly sat in the seat opposite her, closing his eyes. It appeared that he was trying to steady his breath.
Tess was equally hopeful and annoyed at his arrival. She hated the desire she had to climb into his lap, wrap her arms around him and never let go. Fortunately, her anger was closer to the surface. “Where'd you come from?”
Slowly his lids lifted revealing the brilliant blue-green eyes that always stole her breath. This time was no different. “I was in the bedroom in the back.”
“What are you doing here?”
“I'm going to help you.”
“Help me what?”
“Investigate.” The plane lurched. Jack's breath hitched and his fingers tightened on the hand rest of his seat. He wasn't kidding when he said he didn't like to fly.
“Does Daniel know you're here?”
“How do you think I knew you were going to New York? Whose plane do you think we're on?”
“You hate to fly. Why would you have a plane?”
“Because people who work for me often have to go on business trips.” He reached over to shut the blind on the window.
Tess didn't know what to make of it. Why would he volunteer to help? Why would Daniel let him?
“Actually, I'm here to apologize and hopefully get another chance.”
That flutter of hope tried to make its away free again. Tess stamped it down. “So you just show up, offering to help and expect me to forgive and forget?”
“No.” She could see the frustration combined with physical discomfort begin to etch away at his attempt at calm. “I figure I have about two hours to try and convince you to spend the afternoon with me, during which time I'll try to charm you into spending dinner with me. If I'm lucky—”
“You won't be getting lucky.”
His lips curved slightly. “I'm already lucky. I'm alone with you, even if you'd like to throw me out of the plane.”
He had that right. Sort of. “You're not that charming.”
“Okay. I won't use charm. I'll use the fact that I love you, desperately.”
Low blow. She tried to distract herself by reopening the shade and looking out the window. “Great view.”
“I'll take your word for it.”
When he moved, she thought that maybe he was giving up. Instead, he dropped to a knee in front of her and tentatively took her hands in his.
“Tess.” He gave her a remorseful smile. “I know I screwed up. I asked you to trust me with your feelings and then I didn't listen. I promised I would give you time and instead I gave you an ultimatum. I'm sorry. I can give you an excuse if you want one.”
“I don't want anything.” She turned her head away, but left her hands in his. She wanted to shake them off, but couldn't quite bring herself to do it.
“I know you think the worst of me. Not only did I hurt you, but you think that I betrayed you. If I can't win you back, I need to at least convince you that I didn't betray our love. I did go to see Liv the other night, but I didn't sleep with her. I didn't even think about it.” Turbulence jostled the plane, nearly pitching Jack on his butt. “Christ, I think I'm going to be sick.”
“Is that from the flight or from having to grovel?”
He lifted his head and mustered a grin. “Which will earn me more points?”
“Neither, if you puke on my pumps.”
Another round of turbulence sent Jack back to his seat. He let out a curse and lowered his head between his knees.
“Here's the thing,” his muffled voice said. “If I live a hundred years, I won't be able to make up for the pain I caused you, but I'm going to try.”
How was she supposed to guard her heart against a man who was begging for another chance with his head between his knees because he was terrified of flying?
“I know you're thinking, 'why bother? Love sucks. I took a chance and he broke my heart'. But I promise you, Tess, I won't ever hurt you again.” He lifted his head and she considered pretending she wasn't listening to him. But he looked so pathetic and his eyes shone with such love and regret, she found her love for him escaping from the prison she'd tried to lock it in.
Still, while her heart betrayed her, her mind stayed firm. How many times in the last week had they been right where they are now? Trying to make up? Trying to make things work? But for how long? When would their views clash again? Despite their efforts to stay together, they couldn't seem to make it work.
“We've been in this position several times now. How will today be different from every other time?”
He gave her a pained look. “I don't know. All I can promise is that I'll try. I'll never give up on us.”
It was another answer that had her heart melting, but she fought against it. She turned, looking out the window to think and sort out whether or not she needed to cut her losses or let her heart guide her one more time.
Jack knew he was losing the battle. The threat of being sick or having a panic attack made it difficult to keep trying. So he let her brood as he focused on surviving the flight.
When the plane landed, his anxiety about the flight dissipated, but the fear of losing Tess only grew. She barely glanced at him as she rose and went to stand by the door until the pilot opened it.
“I arranged a car for you,” Jack said once the plane's door was open. A black Town Car pulled up to the plane.
The driver stepped out. “Ms. Madison?”
She nodded and the driver opened the door. Jack's heart sank. He knew it had been too much to hope for more, but he'd hoped anyway. He had to let her go. He didn't want to. Instinct had him wanting to go to her, pressure her to let him continue to try. But that's what got him in this position in the first place. It was a true catch-22. But for once he determined he'd go against instinct, which meant he had to let her go. He'd hire another car to take him to Penn Station and catch a train back to Washington, D.C. The plane would stay and return her home tomorrow.
As he slipped his hand into his pocket to pull out his phone and call for a car, he told himself that letting her go now didn't mean all hope was lost. He told her what he needed her to know and now he'd give her
time to reconsider.
He watched as Tess started to get into the car, but stopped. “Do you know the purpose of my trip?”
“You're here to verify or debunk Liv's alibi. And to mend your heart.” He hadn't liked the plan that Daniel had explained to him the night before. Not so much the part of about checking out Liv's story, but instead the part about Tess getting over heartbreak.
“And you're alright with that?”
“Tess, I've never once asked you to stop your investigation.”
She gave him an annoyed look that said, here we go again. “But you don't think she's involved.”
“I don't know,” he said. The truth was he still had difficulty thinking that Liv killed her husband. He knew Liv could be dishonest and unfaithful, but he believed that with him, she was more herself and not the persona she was always putting out into the world. But when Daniel had told him about Liv's baby and he considered all the attempts Liv made to rekindle things with him, despite his repeated rebuffs, he had to consider that the persona was who she really was. He didn't warrant any more honesty or loyalty than anyone else in her life. His loyalty only went so far, he decided.
She gave him a curt nod. “We've got several places to visit.”
It took him a moment to realize she was inviting him to go with her. He tried not to jump for joy or pull her into his arms. Containing his relief, he slid into the car beside her.
The car sped along Interstate 278 to Manhattan and then south to the Upper West Side. While she'd invited him along, she still wouldn't look at him or talk to him. Instead she went over her notes.
“Tess?”
“Hmm?”
“You believe me, don't you? That I wasn't with Liv?”
She looked up at him, her amber eyes piercing his soul. “Yes.”
He let out a breath he hadn't realized he was holding. And yet, he had to be sure. Her demeanor was so different. “It's important to me that you know I never betrayed you.”
“I know you didn't sleep with her. I can see the truth in your eyes,” she said. “But there is more than one kind of betrayal, isn't there?”