Erynn closed her mouth and straightened. “Not tonight what?” She put her hand up. “Never mind. I don’t want to know.”
He stood there, hands on his hips, smiling. “Sex is a physical need, Erynn—like eating and sleeping. Together, in balance, they keep the mind focused, sharp. What’s wrong?”
“That’s all, a physical need? What about love and commitment?”
“Love confuses the mind. It gets in the way of duty and purpose.” He dropped his arms and stepped toward the center of the room. “Some of us are chosen to reproduce when necessary. But only the best.” He was no longer smiling.
She stared at the carpeted floor. “Yeah, I got that impression,” she whispered. Curious, she returned her attention to him. “Have you ever been ‘chosen’?”
He sat on the couch and gazed up at her. “Many times.”
“You have children?”
“I guess—somewhere.”
“You’ve never seen them?”
His jaw tightened. “No. Contact is not allowed.” He stood up and finished unbuckling his pants. “I’m taking a shower. Want to join me?”
“No!” Erynn turned and slapped her hand against the panel to open the door opposite the one Faylen walked toward. She vanished into the dark room. She punched the inner panel and locked the door. Sitting on the edge of the bed, she stared out the window at the night. She watched stars track across the sky, losing herself, and time.
There was a soft tap at her door.
“Go away.”
He sighed on the other side. The knock repeated.
“What?”
His voice came through muffled. “I ordered food. You didn’t tell me what you wanted. So I got a little of everything.”
Erynn’s stomach growled. She yielded. Unlocking the door, she slid the meager barrier only partially open. At least he had clothes on. A neat gray uniform accentuated his muscular build. The door glided open the rest of the way. She walked to the table, surveyed her choices, and grabbed one. Turning, she moved back to her room.
“Wait. Sit out here. I like talking to you.”
Thawing.
Erynn stopped, closed her eyes, opened them, and pivoted slowly. She went back to the table and sat opposite him. “What do you want to talk about?”
Faylen shrugged. “Do you have any questions?”
She nodded. “When you deliver me to Newell, what then? Where do you go?” Erynn stared at the food on the table.
He reached over, opened her choice, and placed the food in front of her. “I’ll be staying with you while you’re on Korin. Newell trusts me with you. No, that’s not exactly correct.” He chuckled. “He trusts you when I’m around.”
Newell.
Erynn forced herself to eat. “And then?”
“I don’t know. At some point you will be taken to the ship.
“Will you be going with me when that happens?” She took another bite, not knowing what she ate. Her sense of taste was dead to flavor. The act of eating was purely mechanical—a physical need with no enjoyment.
“Do you want me to, Erynn?”
“Yes, I think I do.”
Chapter 47
WATERY GRAY LIGHT SLIPPED AROUND the edges of the heavy drapes in Erynn’s room. She lay on her side, confused at first.
There are no drapes or windows in my quarters.
Her stomach tightened. She wasn’t in her quarters. Jaer wasn’t in the room next to her. She sat up, swung her legs over the side of the bed, and pushed curls from her eyes. Her boots stood next to a chair to the right of the window. Faylen sat there, watching her.
“I locked the door. How did you get in?”
He snorted softly. “Erynn, you really don’t believe you would have that much freedom, do you?”
“No, I guess not.” She stared at the floor. The carpet was a thick, deep-blue, appearing black in the dim light. She remembered the pond and the meadow—how they first appeared to her, the water dark and still and the cabin long abandoned. She thought of the maejen coming into her camp, to protect her each night.
I wish I were there. But if I don’t do this, that place and all of Arranon and Korin, will cease to exist.
“I brought you clean clothes.” He gestured to the foot of the bed.
Erynn glanced at them. A gray uniform, similar to the one he wore. She nodded. “I see. I must be presentable to Newell.”
“It’s not that, Erynn. You look… good. In fact, you’re quite striking. Your pale-blue eyes shine against your dark-red hair and fair skin.” He sighed, his attention on the clothes, not on her. “It’s just easier this way, less complicated.”
“Has your life ever been complicated?” She stood up and reached for the uniform, her back to him. “You don’t have to answer that. It’s none of my business.”
Faylen touched the base of a lamp next to him. Bright light came on, chasing the shadows out of the corners. “Yes. There was a time, I think.”
Erynn turned. “You think?” Her voice was soft, encouraging him to talk.
He stared at the wall, his eyes glassy. “There’s this one memory… or a dream. I’m not sure. It feels real, like it actually happened.” His eyes came into focus. He tipped his head and watched her. “I believe my home, my world, was conquered, used up, as yours is about to be. They took me as a small child, seeing some potential. My family was left behind, killed or left to die.”
“They? You sound so factual, so cold. Doesn’t this bother you?” She sat on the foot of the bed. “Why can’t your people, Newell, join a world, fit in and become members of the population? Why is it necessary to destroy? You could settle in—stop fighting and live in peace.”
“They have lived in space, in ships, for so long, I don’t think most would tolerate the transition.”
“Some would. You would.”
A chime sounded in the outer room. He stood up and crossed the small space to the door. Facing the access, he hesitated. “You need to dress. You won’t be disturbed. Take your time.” Faylen glanced over his shoulder. “I’m afraid it’s too late for me.” The door glided open and he walked through, closing behind it him.
***
Erynn emerged later, wearing the slightly baggy uniform. Faylen stood holding back the drape in his right hand and peered out the window. Rain blurred the glass, running in rivulets down the pane. Fat drops tapped with urgent insistence.
“Come and eat. I waited for you. We can talk.”
Erynn smoothed the front of the uniform and walked across the room to the table. He had again ordered enough food for ten people. She sat down and began to fill a plate.
Faylen sat. He stared at his empty dish. “Would your people welcome those that might come to your worlds? Any who may want to make a life here, in peace—a new start?” He glanced into her eyes. His jaw tensed, but his eyes warmed, shining with hope.
Thawing.
“Arranon and Korin are both vast worlds. There’s room. There would be some adjustments.” She leaned forward. “I believe this is possible.”
They ate in silence. She sensed his turmoil, his struggle with opposing concepts. A part of him must yearn for what freedom promised. However, his training went deep.
Erynn only managed to eat a small portion of what was on her plate. When she pushed away from the table, Faylen glanced at her.
“If you’re done, we should go. Newell will be expecting us.”
“I’m ready.”
***
They returned to Korin in a ship identical to the one that brought her to Arranon.
How many days ago was that? Seems like a lifetime.
She studied the pilot working the controls, watching his every movement. His activity offered her a brief distraction from what awaited her. Glancing out the window, she saw the base come into view. Newell’s people controlled Korin now. No security. No Interceptor pilots. No General Brayton.
No Dad.
She bit her lip and hitched in a breath. An ache squeezed in aro
und her heart.
The ship landed, smooth and gentle, lightly touching the ground—not like her landing on Arranon.
Feathers of orange light from the setting sun stretched over the scramble pad. Long shadows surrounded her. A warm breeze blew by, caressing her face. She wiped at the perspiration on her forehead. Erynn had acclimated to the cold of Arranon.
The hangar doors remained open. Interceptors lined the cavernous area. No crews moved about inside. With the space void of activity, her footsteps echoed in the silence.
“Admiral Newell will see us in the morning.” Faylen turned to her. “Is there anywhere you would like to go? This is your home.”
Erynn glanced around. Her heart felt like it would break. She was a visitor here. This was no longer where she fit. Damon was gone. She belonged with Jaer, on Arranon. That was home. She shook her head. “No.”
A transport rushed into the hangar. The door slid open. Faylen gestured for her to enter. Memories of the last time, of Birk, bombarded her. She stiffened, her hands fisted.
“What’s wrong?”
She took in a deep breath and let the air whoosh out. A powerful gust of wind slammed against the outside wall, swirled inside, icy and strong.
“Erynn,” Faylen said in a warning tone.
“I’m fine. Don’t worry. I won’t do anything. Just give me a moment.”
He stepped in close and put his arm around her, pulling her into him. He whispered into her ear. “I can’t begin to imagine what this is like for you.”
His arm, his whole body was stiff, unyielding. He was obviously unaccustomed to this kind of physical contact.
Is he trying to comfort, or control me?
She remembered how she had melted into Jaer, melded into his every curve. His body welcomed hers and warmed to her. Erynn pushed back. “Yes, you can. If you wanted to, you would. You could feel.”
He grasped her arm and shoved her toward the transport. “Face it, Erynn. I am what I am. I’m not going to help you.”
Anger rocked her. If Faylen refused… Arranon, Korin, everything would be gone. A blast of purple current coursed through her, biting into Faylen’s hand. He yelped a curse and released his hold, jerking his arm back. He pulled his weapon and aimed at her. “Get in the vehicle,” he growled, careful not to touch her.
***
They ended up at another visitor center on the base, in another room. Guards lined the hall outside, as before. Faylen didn’t speak to her. He sat on a couch against the wall, his attention on a small hand held computer.
I pushed him too far. Now what do I do? Have I ruined my chance?
“Where do I meet Newell tomorrow?”
“I don’t know where you’re to meet with Admiral Newell.” He didn’t look at her. He just kept brushing his fingers over the screen.
Admiral Newell.
Erynn went to her room. There was no use trying anymore tonight. He was angry, and she wouldn’t get anywhere with him like this. She lay on the bed, thinking about Jaer, seeing his smile, hearing his voice, and feeling his arms around her.
Faylen knocked at her door later. “There’s food,” he grunted.
She stood up and joined him in the sitting room. Erynn didn’t want to eat, but she knew she must. There was one plate, already filled, on the table.
No choices tonight.
Faylen had already eaten, by the looks of a second dish. He lay on the couch, his arm over his eyes.
No conversation tonight either.
Erynn finished eating and sat down in a chair at Faylen’s head.
He raised his arm and glanced back at her. His lips turned up in a smile. “Admiral Newell wants you brought to the ship in the morning. After what happened in the hangar, I don’t think he trusts you here, on Korin.” His arm went back over his eyes.
This is too soon. Faylen hasn’t agreed to help me yet.
“You said you would take me anywhere I wanted,” Erynn blurted. “I thought of a place I’d like to go.”
“Erynn, it’s late. We’ll be leaving early. Besides, I have plans for the rest of the evening.”
“Cancel them. I promise you won’t be sorry.”
He sat up, grinning. “How far? Where is this place?”
“Not far. I promise.”
“You’re making a lot of promises, Erynn.” Faylen rubbed his chin. “Have you ever—”
“Does it matter?” She felt the blush flooding her cheeks.
His smile dropped. “What about the man in black?”
She looked away. “It wasn’t like that with us.”
“He didn’t love you? Or you didn’t love him? Is that why?
“We do… did love each other.”
“Then why?”
“I told you—it was different for us.”
“Ah, you wanted love and commitment.”
“You say that like it’s something bad.”
“I just don’t understand,” he said in a low voice. Faylen stood up. “Let’s go.” He stared into her eyes. “I will cancel my plans. There is no obligation required on your part.”
Chapter 48
THE MEADOW WAS A PLACE her dad, Damon, took her during the summers—a big house in the mountains, filled with love and good memories. The back decking looked over a large open pasture. Erynn passed the house, crossing over the thick grass to stand in the field. Stars dotted the sky, twinkling. The temperature was cooler here, and it was quiet. A soft breeze stirred the tops of the trees with a gentle sigh.
“Are you planning on running, Erynn?”
She turned to face him as he approached. He was a darker form in the night. “No. Are you?”
The air around her exploded into bright points of blue, purple, and green. She smelled the sweet, spicy scent of the Anim Blath.
Faylen watched the lights, frowning. He wrinkled his nose as the aroma reached him.
Erynn took his hand before he could turn away. High voices called, all talking at once.
Faylen gripped Erynn’s hand, ducked his head, and grimaced.
“He can see, smell, and hear you. How is that possible?”
A chorus of shrill voices answered. “Because of you. You are showing him.”
He sucked in a breath. His head rolled back, eyes staring upward.
Erynn experienced what Faylen did—sensed his pain at his bittersweet memory.
Red and gold leaves wafted down through late afternoon light. A young woman with long brown hair pushed through the branches. “Fayl, it’s time to come in. Your father will be home soon.” She laughed. “You’d spend all your time outside if I let you.”
A man jumped from behind a large tree trunk. “Fayl. Race you to the house.” He smoothed the tousled brown curls on the boy’s head. Smiling, he took the woman in his arms and kissed her. “Aumie, have I told you today how much I love you, how happy you’ve made me?
The woman put her arms around the man. “Yes, Kiayl, but tell me again.”
He picked her up, swinging her around and around.
The vision faded. Night once again surrounded them.
Faylen let out the breath he’d been holding. “Her name was Aumie, my mother—I remember.” His hands clenched and his jaw muscles bunched. In a low threatening voice he whispered, “They took my parents, my happiness, my chance for a good life.” His chest rose and fell, breath hitching through constrained lungs.
Erynn whispered, “Faylen, you can’t let this happen to others like you that have love, families, and happiness.”
“No.” He shook his head. Tears glimmered in his dark eyes. “Now I will take from Newell.”
Chapter 49
FAYLEN TOOK ERYNN TO ADMIRAL Newell as soon as they arrived on the Andor, a Class Seven Battle Cruiser.
Standing on an upper tier of the bridge, Newell waited. His back was to the thick, clear panels restraining the unforgiving environment of space. His piercing gaze never wavered from Erynn as she crossed the catwalk. Features taut, hands clasped behind him, Newell’
s emotions rolled over her—excitement, anticipation, and fear.
He should be afraid.
Erynn’s dread kept a smile from forming. She had a surprise or two planned for Newell—even if her actions meant she would never leave the ship alive.
Muted, sallow light did little to illuminate the bridge. Everything from the metal catwalk and bolted plates of the walls to the banks of equipment below was black and gray. There was no color, no light. The area was dim, shadowy, and eerily quiet. A constant low thrum of engines throbbed in the stale, hazy air.
Terror, furtive glances, and preternatural silence from the men at their stations below swarmed up and over her, revealing their uneasiness at her unwelcome presence.
Faylen walked behind her. His controlled breathing didn’t calm the anger that rippled from him.
Erynn stopped in front of Newell. He was of average height with a slim build. Closely cropped dark-gray hair matched the steely color of his eyes. He wore a black tailored uniform. The deep resonance of his voice wasn’t what would be expected from a man of his slight stature.
“Erynn Yager.” His hands dropped to his sides. “I’ve spent considerable time and effort looking for you. You’ve caused me some difficulties.” He glanced at Faylen. “Congratulations Captain, or should I say Major Faylen.”
Faylen stood next to Erynn. He nodded, his face stone, and bowed slightly to Newell. “Yes, sir.”
“Well, Yager, what happens to you will depend on how readily you cooperate. I encourage you to do just that. Don’t make the same mistake your father did.”
It took control not to lash out at Newell here and now. Erynn wanted him to know who had made the biggest mistake. If she acted prematurely, showed her strengths too soon, it would serve no purpose. She took in a calming breath and repeated patience over and over again through her mind.
Newell turned to stare out at the diamond points of stars. “I’ll expect your assistance with my conquest of Arranon. And soon.” His show of daring, by turning his back on her, didn’t change the emotion radiating from him.
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