“Almost back to normal. I’ve hit physical therapy pretty hard since I got home, and I should be cleared for football by the time the season starts. You need to stop worrying, Allie. I’m fine. ‘Gunshot wound to the chest’ sounds way worse than it actually was. I was lucky the bullet didn’t do much damage and I’m a super-fast healer.” He splashed her and gave her a cocky grin as he swam circles around her.
They had Aidan to thank for his quick recovery. He’d worked his butt off to get Vince on the mend so his doctors would clear him for travel.
Vince brushed the damp curls from Allie’s face and leaned in for a kiss, his lips warm against hers. She responded to his slow, confident kiss, pressing her body against him as his hands wandered over her curves in a familiar way.
“It seems like forever since we’ve been alone like this,” he murmured, trailing kisses of fire down the column of her throat.
“It’s been way too long.” Her hands moved like they had a mind of their own, tracing the lines of his shoulders with her fingertips.
“Allie?” Vince eyed her as her hands slid lower. “Not here.” His voice came out in a rasp.
“Then let’s go to my room.”
He hesitated, taking a deep breath. “Are you sure?”
“Positive.” She pulled him close, the heat rising between them.
He was always so careful not to let it go too far, but she was ready and confident in her decision. He was the right guy. They loved each other and they’d waited nearly a year. Vince ticked all the right boxes.
He held her as they drifted with the gentle current back toward the shore. She was nervous, but excited … everything she should feel, and Vince was definitely the right guy.
I totally won the boyfriend lottery. Her heart thudded in her chest as her power stirred hot within her core.
“I love you, Allie,” he whispered against her ear, his voice a rasp of desire.
“I love you too.” She gasped as he draped her legs around his hips, heading closer to shore. His lips covered her mouth and she trembled at the feel of his body against hers, his hands sliding down her back.
She felt the warmth rising within her, unable to resist the urge to let her power flood her body. Her fingertips danced across the scar on his chest and a pang of regret shot through her for the pain she’d caused him.
“You are so beautiful,” he whispered. “You sure about this, Allie? I want you to be certain.” He laced his fingers through hers, brushing a kiss across her fingertips. “We can stop.”
“I’m ready.”
“No you aren’t. Not here, anyway.” He kissed down to her collarbone, his breath hot against her chilled skin. “Let’s get out of this water.”
“Vin.” She gasped at the foreign sensation as his kisses trailed lower. Her hands slid through his damp hair. She arched into him, heat radiating from her core, her power surging in response to her desire. She moaned, her control slipping away from her for a brief moment.
The sandy lake bottom brushed against her back as they washed up on the beach. Vince pulled away and she ran her hands up his chest, eager to continue exploring such new territory with him, but she was trembling, fighting against the power that wanted to flame hot within her.
With a soft moan, Vince slumped over, clutching his chest.
“Vin?”
He wasn’t breathing.
“No! Vince. Please, no!” She rolled him onto his back and dragged him out of the water onto the dry grass along the beach.
AIDAN!
Allie, what the hell? What’s wrong?
She flooded him with the details in an instant, begging him to come help. She stared down at Vince, unsure what to do. His lips were turning blue and she cursed herself for never learning CPR.
“Please, Vince. Just breathe.” She scrambled to pull her shirt back on just before Aidan came charging up the beach from the grotto.
“Help him, please!” she sobbed. “He’s not breathing.”
“What happened?”
“I think it’s his heart. One minute he was fine. We were swimming. And then he just collapsed.”
Aidan placed his hands over Vince’s chest, his jaw clenched in frustration, his eyes bright with hurt. She knew seeing them half-dressed like this was killing him.
“What did you do, Allie?” His voice low and filled with frustration.
“N-nothing.”
“Did you lose control?”
“Maybe for a second. Please. Just help him,” she whispered, hanging her head in shame. Not for what had passed between her and her boyfriend, but for the pain she caused Aidan. She knew what it felt like when the situation was reversed.
She watched as Aidan’s eyes flashed golden, focusing his healing gift on Vince’s still form. Aidan was young and some things were beyond his ability, but she knew he wouldn’t let him die. Not like this. Not if he could help it.
“He’ll be fine.” Aidan finally let out a breath, swiping at the trickle of blood oozing from his nose.
Vince’s chest lifted and fell, but he didn’t open his eyes.
“He’s breathing now, Lex. I just had to get his heart rhythm back to normal.”
“I wasn’t thinking. I-I didn’t know. I-I wasn’t prepared.”
“Well, rein it in. Your eyes are blazing like green fire. Get it under control before you give the poor sap a heart attack.”
“Aidan, how did this happen?”
“I don’t know. At most, it should have just weakened him, but if you unleashed your full power on him … that could have unpredictable consequences. You and I have to be more careful in these situations.”
“I could have killed him.”
“I’m sorry, it just never occurred to me to warn you.” He ran his hands through his hair, the way he did when he was really frustrated. “I didn't actually think you'd have sex with him, Allie.”
“We were just kissing.”
“Should we take him to the hospital? He's not waking up.” Allie chewed her lip, worrying there was something wrong with him that Aidan might not be strong enough to fix.
“He's just resting. Let’s get him inside.”
Allie grabbed the rest of their clothes and helped Aidan move Vince up the lawn and into the house. She fussed with the pillows, making sure he was comfortable on the couch, grateful her parents weren’t home yet.
“Allie?” Vince groaned, his eyelids fluttering.
“I’m here, Vin. It’s okay.”
“What happened?” His eyes snapped open, glaring at Aidan. “Why's he here?”
“It’s okay, you just passed out for a minute.” Allie eased him back on the couch as the lie came to her far too easily. She was so sick of the lies.
Call Daniel, she whispered miserably.
Already texted him.
“I just keep hurting him.” She paced anxiously across the living room.
“I’m fine, Allie,” Vince said, but his color didn’t look good. “Your eyes? What happened? We were swimming … right?”
Allie's glance fell to the floor. Could he really see the power in her eyes?
“It’ll be all right. He’ll forget, Allie. Just let him ramble till Daniel gets here,” Aidan said.
“I can’t believe I let this happen.” Allie brushed her hand across Vince’s cheek. He flinched and she could see the accusation and fear in his eyes. He may not have understood what happened, but he could sense it was her fault. She had to end this. She wasn’t mortal and it was time she stopped pretending with Vince. She loved him, but she was using him. Time to face reality, Allie. She gave herself a mental pep talk.
“What’s going on here?” Daniel called from the kitchen garden.
“In here,” Aidan said. “Allie lost control. Vince had a little episode with his heart and passed out. I revived him, but he needs to not remember any of this happened. And if you could do the same for me, that’d be great.”
“His heart? That’s, er … extreme.” Daniel avoided looking anywh
ere but at Allie in her half-dressed state.
“Make him forget?” Allie begged. “Please, Daniel, make him forget everything.”
“Of course, sweetheart. It’ll be okay. He won't remember any of this.”
“No,” she whispered. “Make him forget me.”
~~~
CHAPTER
THREE
“You want me to what?” Daniel stared at her.
“Make him forget we were ever together,” Allie said.
“Allie, wait! What are you saying?” Vince protested, confusion written all over his face.
“Shhh, Vin. It’ll be over soon.” She held his hand as she crouched beside him.
“Allie, you’re upset. There’s no need to do anything so rash as that. Go get dressed and I'll take care of this,” Daniel said.
Allie turned and stumbled to the bathroom, grabbing her shorts and shoes as she went.
She slammed the powder room door behind her and collapsed on the vanity bench, resting her head on the cool concrete countertop. Daniel didn’t get it. She’d never thought more clearly than she did right then. She'd known it all summer. The guilt she felt for Vince’s injury was with her every day. She'd tried to compensate for that guilt by convincing herself that they were happy and she wasn’t using him. But she was—and not in a bad way, because she knew she loved him, but she was using him as an escape and it was selfish of her to keep putting him at risk simply because she didn't want to face the reality of her life as an Immortal. She had to stop keeping one foot stubbornly rooted in the mortal world. It wasn’t worth risking her boyfriend’s life.
“Aidan, can you give us a minute? I’d like to speak to Daniel privately,” she asked when she returned, fully clothed and her eyes dry. Vince lay sleeping where she'd left him. He looked so peaceful.
“Gladly.” Aidan practically ran for the door. She could feel just how much this whole situation tormented him and it ripped her apart. She was constantly stuck between staying true to what she knew was right for her, and hurting the most important person in her life.
It didn't happen, Aidan. It never went that far. I-I think I was trying to talk myself into taking the next logical step with him. Like I could force this relationship to work just because I wanted it to.
His only response was a feeling of relief.
Am I still welcome in your sanctuary?
Always.
I’ll meet you there soon.
“It is not safe for him to be with me anymore, Daniel.” Allie squared her shoulders, firm in her resolve. “I’ve hurt him enough and the next time could be worse. I can’t keep doing this.”
“I won't do it, Allie. Especially not like this. Vince won't remember what happened tonight. I’ll take him home and he’ll sleep it off. He will remember your reunion up to a certain point and then he will remember going home. There's no harm done here. You can move on from this and be happy with the boy you love—but you must be more careful. You cannot lose control like that again. Not with anyone.”
“There won’t be a next time. I don’t feel right about this anymore. It’s done, we’re done. Whether you help me make it easier for him or not.” She sat on the edge of the armchair near the wall of glass overlooking the garden and stared at the late-blooming flowers. “After the summer we've had—it's been better than ever between us—he's never going to understand.”
“I will not remove his memories of your entire relationship. That crosses a line I will not breach,” Daniel said. “It wouldn’t hurt him, but it wouldn’t be fair to either of you to deny you both the experience of a difficult breakup, simply to spare his feelings. You must find a way to do this on your own.”
“Can't you make him think we’re just friends? That we broke up months ago for some stupid reason? Anything to make this easier? I just … can't break his heart.”
“I won’t do that either, sweetheart. My gift is a tool, meant to help preserve the secrecy of our world. It is not to be used to ease a wounded heart. We just got back. Let things settle down first. And think about it long and hard before you make any decisions.”
“I don’t need to think about it. I should have done this months ago.”
“Then take some time to find a way to end your relationship amicably. This is a good experience for you, Allie. Next time you will carefully consider what it means to date a mortal. It’s not something you should feel you cannot do, but it never seems to end well for us or the mortals we love. We will discuss this further during our training session next week. Until then, don’t make any rash decisions.”
Allie nodded, but she knew she wouldn’t change her mind. She was done with Vince. She would not interfere in his life any longer.
~~~
Allie slipped out of the house and across the garden to the small shed. She fumbled with the hidden latch in the floorboards that concealed the much more sophisticated entrance to the tunnels below. Punching in her code on the digital pad, she climbed down the long ladder, closing the entrance behind her. She hated this part. She could see in the darkness, but Allie didn't like the confines of the deep shaft that allowed her access to the natural caves and tunnels that sprawled out like a maze below the island.
The underground was like home to her now. As she ran along the tunnel leading to the common room, Allie wished she could run fast enough to escape what she’d done.
I almost killed him. She opened her thoughts to Aidan. This time it wouldn’t have been an errant bullet to the chest—it would have been by her own hand.
It’s not your fault, Lex.
She pushed him away again, unable to bear the unerring confidence of his thoughts. The way he saw her never ceased to make her feel inadequate, but right now she wanted nothing more than to forget this whole night ever happened and just get back to her normal routine.
Allie tugged on the enormous carved door that led to the common room across the great stone hall where all the Kelley’s Island tunnels converged. The fan-vaulted ceilings, once so impressive, barely registered with her now, even after all the months away. Allie made her way on autopilot through the tangle of hallways to Aidan’s office.
“You have got to chill, babe,” Aidan said in amusement. “You’re making me tense.”
“Sorry,” she muttered.
“It was an accident. Put it behind you. Now, how about a drink? It’s been a long night and I raided Dare’s stash.”
Allie smiled to herself, grateful that she could trust him to know she did not want to talk about what happened. “Cheers to that.” She flopped into the armchair by the cold fireplace. She watched as he crossed the span of his office to pour her a glass of wine and himself a tumbler of Scotch he’d pilfered from somewhere when his brother wasn’t looking. He looked tired and his dark, shaggy hair was a mess. In that moment, she knew they both felt a thousand years old.
Her thoughts drifted back to Vince. They weren’t right for each other. She’d done everything she could to convince herself they were. She just hadn’t been ready to let him go … until now.
So ten months, then, not one. Aidan's dry humor echoed in her mind and she couldn’t help but laugh. He'd expected her to come to this realization months ago. He'd pushed in his impatience for her to accept this life and move on with him at her side. Of course it blew up in his face, culminating in the worst argument they'd ever had and weeks of not talking to each other. She hadn't been ready—still wasn't ready for what he was offering.
You will be, someday.
She could feel his hopes rising and the thought of dashing them again filled her with anxiety. He meant the world to her, and the last thing she ever wanted was to cause him pain, but it seemed that was all she ever did.
Aidan, I … don’t know if I’ll ever be the girl you want me to be. She was doing marginally better as she approached her first full year after her Awakening, but she still wasn’t there yet. And she knew she could never be the vision of sheer perfection Aidan saw when he looked at her.
I’ve be
en an impatient asshat. Call it a personal fault I'm working on.
Aidan, the way you see me.…
I see you, Lex. I’m not seeing anything more than what you are.
You forget I’ve got a front-row seat in your mind. I can literally see how you look at me and what you feel for me. I don’t know if I can ever measure up to that. It would be so easy to let this happen between us, but I … don’t want to wake up one day and not know who I am without you. I need to know who I am on my own, and that’s not something I’m going to figure out in a few months or even a few years. I can’t imagine that’s something you could really know about yourself either.
“You have a fair point, Lex. But there is one fatal flaw in your logic.” He stared down at her as he handed her a chilled glass of white wine, courtesy of his temperature gift.
“And what’s that?”
“You think I’m incapable of entering into an easy, no-pressure relationship with you. You think it's all or nothing with me, which tells me that you’re the one who can’t handle the depth of your feelings for me.” His eyes twinkled as his cocky smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. She knew he also had a fair point.
“I’m ending it with Vince, but that doesn’t mean I will jump into another relationship anytime soon. You know I don’t want to be that girl.” She took a grateful sip of her wine, ignoring his last comment because she didn’t have an answer either of them would like.
“I know, Allie.” He crouched in front of her, grasping her free hand. “Whatever hope you feel coming from me, it’s something I can’t help feeling, knowing you’re finally going to end it with him.” He shifted closer, resting his hands on the arms of her chair until his face was just inches from hers. “But I love you and I’m not going to apologize for that. Especially when I know you’re head over heels for me, but you’re just too scared and stubborn to admit it to yourself.”
He tipped his glass back and drained it in one gulp.
Emerge: The Judgment: (Book 2) Page 2