And he was something else. Something I didn’t get. Something I couldn’t read. Something that didn’t belong in his eyes. It was wrong there.
Cataclysmically wrong.
“I will not take you by force for I know you will use it as well as reason never to forgive me and now I know it to be true, from the name your father called me, that you never will.”
“Lahn –” I whispered again as what I saw in his eyes, held by his spirit, started to dawn.
He talked over me. “But you should know before I leave you to be my queen only for our people, my wife only to be mother to Tunahn and Isis and I let you go, that I suffered for my mistake, I suffered for it greatly when I found you left me.”
My heart thumped harder just as my belly melted.
Yes, I knew what that was in his eyes.
Defeat.
Oh God.
I had to stop this. Now.
“Honey –” I tried speaking softly, using an endearment he liked as I gently put my hands on him but I failed to break through.
“I spent five months agonizing that I had lost you forever, haunted in sleep and in wake with the vision of your spirit fading to nothing in your eyes, knowing I’d crushed it to death and I’d forced you to escape me. Me, your king, your warrior, your Lahn, yours, in the end being no better than Dortak.”
Oh God.
“Lahn –” I started as my body softened under his and my arms wrapped around him.
“And knowing with every day that passed when you didn’t return to me, you were never going to find your way back to me. And despairing as each day moved into the next with no word from Karrim that I wouldn’t find a way to bring you home.”
I slid my hands to his front and up to curl them light around his neck. “Baby, listen to –”
“My golden doe, gone. My child with her. Never to see her heavy with my seed, never to look upon my warrior or golden daughter, never again to feel her body at sleep in our bed next to mine.”
“Lahn, seriously, honey, please listen –”
“Then Karrim finds a witch to bring you home to me, we give her trunks of gold only for you to come back broken.”
God! He needed to shut the fuck up so I could fucking talk!
“Lahn!” I snapped urgently, my fingers digging into his neck but I still didn’t break through.
“And I did that, I broke you and the only hint you gift me with that there is a possibility my golden goddess lives on somewhere inside is when you found the strength to deliver upon me our children.”
Jeez, when my man got on a tangent, there was no shutting him the fuck up!
“Lahn, damn it –!” I shouted in his face but it was like I didn’t make a noise as he kept talking over me.
“But still, you remain lost, never to come back to me.”
And that was it. I’d had enough.
And to communicate that, with a mighty heave, I planted my feet in the bed, arched my back and shoved his shoulders, pushing him to his back but going with him so I was straddling his hips, my fingers curled into his shoulders, my torso pressed to his and my face an inch away.
“Will you… shut… up?” I yelled, his mouth closed and he scowled up at me. “Jeez!” I cried, looking over his head before I looked back at him. “The drama. God!”
“Circe –” he growled but I snapped, “Quiet, Lahn, I’m talking now.”
He closed his mouth and scowled again.
I glared.
Then I spoke. “You upset me, broke my heart, okay, I think you get that. That’s coming through loud and clear, big guy. You hurt me. But seriously, I mean, the shit I was telling you, it was whacked. Totally unbelievable. So I get that too. But I’m an idiot and I lead with my heart and do stupid shit all the freaking time. And I got so upset because I loved you so much it hurt so badly, what you said, that I did it again. I acted before I thought. I followed my heart, which hurt, and I did something really freaking stupid. So, okay, Pop calls you an asshole because he knows things didn’t start too great but… clue in, Lahn. He left me here. He knows I love you and he wants me to be happy. Yeesh!” I sat up, tipped my head back and looked at the ceiling. “For someone as unbelievably clev –”
I didn’t finish because I was on my back and my body was jolted violently because my sarong was yanked clean off.
Oh man.
I focused on his heated eyes just in time for my undies to be torn away… yep, torn away, my body jerking again as they went.
Oh man.
“Lahn,” I breathed as he rolled on top of me, I was already turned on because I suddenly found myself naked under my king’s fantastic, heavy, warm body and from the hot look in his eyes.
His big hands trailed swiftly down the backs of my thighs then they yanked up. “You forgive me,” he growled.
“Uh… yeah, awhile ago. I’m just a –”
I didn’t finish because his mouth took mine in a searing kiss, a wet one, a deep one, a long one and a very, very hot one.
Oh yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
He tore his mouth from mine and I finished my sentence on a dazed, breathless, “Dork.”
“I do not know what that is, my doe, but I do not care,” he whispered against my lips as his fingers slid through the wetness gathering between my legs and then his lips slid to my ear. “I will try to be gentle but since I took my first at the age of twelve, I have never waited this long. Nowhere near. I do not think I can.”
I pressed into his hand, tugged at the ties on his hides, turned my head and whispered in his ear, “Don’t bother with gentle, honey, I just want to feel you again.”
He didn’t wait to be asked twice and there he was.
Oh yeah.
God, I loved the feel of my husband.
“Yes,” I whispered and that was all I could say, his mouth came back to mine, his hips drove in, hard, fast, uncontrolled, my thighs pressed tight to his sides as one arm held fast around his muscled back and the other hand pulled out his plait and slid into his my gorgeous hair.
I knew he struggled, I felt it but my Lahn, like always, held on until it hit me, hot, hard and piercing, and I cried out into his mouth, my limbs tightening then he let go, his growled release mingling with mine.
Oh yeah.
I was right there, right where I needed to be.
I was home.
After we both recovered, Lahn stayed planted deep as his mouth trailed to my ear.
“You love me,” he whispered there and my limbs tightened.
“Yeah,” I whispered back.
“Say it,” he growled and I closed my eyes and turned my head so my lips were at his ear.
“I love you, baby.”
I barely got the words out before his head came up and his mouth came back down on mine. This kiss was slow, gentle and sweet as well as wet and deep.
When he broke the connection of our mouths, he rested his forehead on mine and my hand slid from his hair to cup his bearded jaw.
“I’m sorry, honey,” I said quietly and he closed his eyes, the pads of my fingers dug in and he opened them again. “I left it too long and the longer I left it, the harder –”
“Okay, my Circe,” he cut me off, tipped his chin to touch his mouth to mine, he rolled to his back so I was on top and his arms were tight around me. “Okay,” he whispered in my ear.
Okay.
Man, I loved it when he said that.
Yep, I was a dork.
But I could not let it go at that. He was my Lahn and he deserved more so I lifted my head and one of his hands came up to pull my hair back and hold it bunched at the back of my head.
“I’m glad you think it’s okay, baby, but I need to know you understand I’m sorry,” I said softly.
“I understand,” Lahn returned, his voice as gentle as his handsome face.
I licked my lips and shared, “I missed you,” I closed my eyes, tipped my head and dropped it so my forehead was on his and then I opened them, saw th
e warm softness in his dark ones and continued, “I missed you when I was gone and I missed you when you brought me back.”
Lahn didn’t reply but his arm around me squeezed.
My hand still at his jaw, I swept my thumb over his beautiful lips as I said quietly, “I don’t want to be anywhere but here.”
His eyes closed slowly and his hand in my hair tipped my face so I would touch my mouth against his then he released me and I lifted my head away just an inch.
“Are we good?” I whispered.
“Yes, Circe, good,” he whispered back.
My thumb swept his lips again and then moved back over his cheekbone as my eyes watched.
“Linas, kah Lahnahsahna,” Lahn demanded quietly and my gaze shifted back to his. His eyes were warm, his mouth soft and his voice softer when his hand in my hair slid around to my face and his thumb pressed lightly under my eye. “There she is.”
I felt my smile wobble as my lungs squeezed and my eyes got wet.
“Did my Lahn resurrect her?” I asked softly and his hand slid back into my hair, pulling me down for another lip touch before letting me move away an inch.
And that was when I saw his brutal, fierce golden spirit burning bright in his eyes for me to see and I knew his answer before he gave it to me.
“Yes, my Circe, she burns bright again for me.”
“Dohno,” I whispered then kept whispering, “Now I know what I suspected to be true. My husband is a god. He can do anything.”
I caught his grin before he rolled me to my back.
Then he muttered in my ear, “Let us see if this is true.”
“Okay,” I agreed readily and listened to his chuckle as it rumbled against my skin.
Oh yeah.
I was home.
* * * * *
I watched Lahn walk back into our room after putting down Tunahn who I just fed.
Night had fallen but candlelight lit the room softly. If I was lucky and fell asleep quickly, I could maybe get four hours in.
Lahn got under the covers, stretched out beside me, shoved an arm under me and curled me to his long, warm, hard side.
Okay, fuck that. No way I was sleeping.
I lifted up on an elbow, rested my hand on his chest and looked into his dark, beloved eyes.
“Do you make trainee warriors buff your saddle?” I asked and he blinked.
“What?”
“Trainee warriors. Do you make them buff your saddle?”
His mouth twitched. “Warriors in training learn and do many things, kah Lahnahsahna. Buffing saddles is not one of them.”
My eyes drifted to his shoulder and I muttered, “Oh.”
“Something they do learn,” he went on and my eyes moved back to his, “is not to waste time performing deeds that are not worth performing. Like buffing saddles.”
I started giggling. Lahn’s arm gave me a squeeze as his lips tipped up into a smile.
I rested my chest into his, my arm curving around him, my face getting closer.
“Did you really lose your virginity when you were twelve?” I whispered and his eyes immediately shuttered so I shook his body with my arm. “Lahn.”
“Meena,” he said shortly.
“No joke?” I asked, eyes wide with surprise, he studied me then he shook his head.
“No joke.”
“Wow,” I breathed. “That’s kinda young isn’t it?”
He kept studying me. Then he stated, “A warrior’s trainer will decide when a warrior is ready to advance through all facets of his training. My trainer decided I was ready to take a woman at twelve. So I took a Xacto at twelve.”
I felt his gaze sharpen on my face when he said the word “Xacto” so I told him quickly, “Baby, I know you’re not going to step out on me. If a guy like you who needs it as often as you do and the way you do can hang on for eight months for me, I have no worries about you going to the Xacto.”
“No, my Circe, you have no worries about me going to the Xacto,” he said quietly.
I smiled at him.
Lahn smiled back.
Then he asked, “What is a… dork?”
I giggled again. Then I explained, “A kind of, I don’t know, it’s hard to explain. A person that does stupid shit, kinda klutzy, kinda bonkers, kinda foolish, not enough of any of those to be really stupid or harm anyone, just, I don’t know, a dork or…” I tipped my head to the side and grinned, “Me.”
Lahn wasn’t grinning. “My golden queen is not a dork,” he declared.
I slid in closer and said, still grinning, “Big guy, I lost it and spirited my pregnant ass home for five months, leaving you behind when I promised never to leave you at all. Then my Pop gave me a big lecture about leaving the man I was in love with, I got back, forgave you weeks before I told you I did, which was about the time Karrim told me you never gave up on me, then got myself caught up in procrastination, which, by the way, Pop also used to lecture me about all the time, so it got harder and harder to talk to you about it to the point where I pissed you off and made you give up on me. Calling myself a dork is being nice. I was way beyond a dork.”
“This is true,” he agreed so swiftly I blinked.
Then I stared.
Then I burst out laughing.
And I didn’t stop when I was pulled full on top of my husband, he rolled me to my back, covered my body with his, shoved his face in my neck and I heard his deep laughter rumbling against my skin as I felt it shaking my body.
And passersby, spies and those who were just plain nosy who were paying attention outside our house heard the mighty Dax and his rahna Dahksahna’s mirth and about forty-five minutes later, they heard something else entirely.
And all they heard was all over Korwahn the next morning.
* * * * *
The sun was touching the sky when something woke me. I felt disconcerted before it hit me.
I was not sleeping under Lahn’s warm body. I was pressed to the side of it, his arm around me, my cheek to his shoulder, my arm around his abs.
My eyes opened and I stared at my daughter, her rosy, chubby cheek pressed to her father’s brown, muscled chest, her eyes closed, her pink lips pursed in a cute, little baby pout, her sweet little fist resting light on his smooth, dark skin.
I felt my lips turn up and I slid my arm from my husband’s stomach so I could rest my hand on my daughter’s fat rump.
Then carefully, I tipped my head back to see my handsome husband’s sleeping profile.
I hadn’t heard her and this meant she’d probably woken and, as Isis was content to do, she just quietly took things in.
But my husband’s sensed her awake and went to go get his daughter.
That made my lips turn up deeper.
He either felt the slight movement of my mouth or sensed my eyes on him, his opened and his head turned to me. When I looked into their dark depths I saw they were somnolent and sexy and all the love he felt for me was warm, sweet and openly read in the depths of them.
Yes, oh yes, I was home.
I pressed against Isis’s bottom.
“We’re going to have to talk about this,” I whispered.
I watched with fascination as he grinned.
I let that process through me as I grinned back.
Then I sighed.
Then I tipped my chin down and closed my eyes, deciding we’d talk about it later.
Tunahn would be hungry soon. I needed to get my rest.
* * * * *
Harold Quinn listened as he watched the old woman in a trance, her voice saying his daughter’s words, his heart breaking a little and mending a little more.
“Hey Pop. Get this! You’ve got two grandbabies. Twins! Can you believe that? Tunahn is our boy and his name means horse. They have a bunch of different gods here and the horse god is one. Lahn’s name means tiger and that’s a god too. He named Tunahn after the horse god because horses are strong, clever and loyal. Our other baby is a little girl. She has fuzzy, golden hair t
hat I’m pretty sure is going to be just like Mom’s and mine. Tunahn, I forgot to tell you, has black hair like his Dad. Her name is Isis. I named her like you and Mom named me. Tunahn is already strong as an ox, no joke. He also bawls a lot but that’s because he’s a greedy, little monster and cannot seem to get enough milk. But he doesn’t have to bawl long. I can’t keep my hands off him. He’s my little warrior. He’s growing leaps and bounds. Isis is my golden baby; she rarely cries and is super sweet. Her Dad freaking adores her. If Tunahn wakes in the night, Lahn is cool with me getting up and feeding but he’s firm about Tunahn going back to his bed. If Isis does, Lahn’s all over letting her sleep with us. Don’t worry, I’ve nipped that in the bud. Well, kind of.”
The witch sucked in a huge breath and then kept talking, just like his Circe could do.
“You were right, as usual. I guess it sucks that I’ve learned that now when you’re a world away. The witch says that we can try to send these messages but they can’t be certain to reach their target. Though I hope we can, even if it’s only random. I’ll promise to keep trying and I hope you do too. But, like I said, you were right. Lahn and I worked things out. He worked hard at it and maybe I made him work too hard but I love him and I forgave him and now I’m happy. You don’t have to worry. It’s all good. He loves me a lot, Pop, and shows me he does. I’m happy, honestly, very happy. He’s a good guy and if you met him, it might take awhile, but you’d like him.” A pause then, “Oh, by the way, if you could do me a favor and not call him an asshole in your next message that would be cool. I taught him English and he figured out what that meant and he didn’t much like it.”
Harold Quinn grinned.
The witch went on. “If I don’t hear from you, or you don’t hear from me, I want you to know I miss you and I love you and I always will. Always, Pop. You’re the best Pop a girl could have. The… absolute… best.”
Oh yeah. There it was. That was his girl.
The witch kept talking. “Tell the guys I said hey and give Marlene a hug for me and let her and Circe know I’m all right.”
Another sucked in breath and then the witch went on.
“And I promise I’m all right, Pop. Promise. I’m… well, Daddy, what can I say? I’m home.”
The woman’s shoulders slumped, her head dropped then it shot up and she blinked, her blind eyes focusing on nothing but no longer hazed by her trance.
The Golden Dynasty f-2 Page 47