The pizza arrived and Ame gave him until he had finished the second slice before the questions began. And when they did he couldn’t believe she went straight for the jugular.
“So Chris, when did you fall in lust with Daniel?”
When Chris finally stopped coughing he covered his shock with a simple raise of his eyebrows.
“What?” he said. He used that tone of disbelief that had worked so well with his parents when he was younger. The one that spoke of complete innocence. Ame thumped his leg, causing his red wine to wobble dangerously. That would be an awesome end to the evening: sleeping in a wet patch that wasn’t put there by hot and sweaty sex.
“Your face, and don’t deny it, you went all red and then tongue-tied, so spill.”
“What exactly do you want to know? You’ve seen how I get when someone remotely good-looking comes to the counter.”
“This was different,” Ame said. And she was right.
“You’re not going to let this go, are you?” Ame shook her head and even leaned forward a little to show her interest. Chris thought back to the very first time he had seen Daniel. That was as good a place to start as any he guessed. “Well, the first time I saw Daniel was maybe the second lesson after I was asked to TA for English. He walks in all swagger and money and with a group of other freshman kids his age all hanging off his every word. He was bright. So bright. But he cruised the year. I never actually caught him doing anything remotely like studying but somehow he managed to score just enough in all his classes to pass. Funny enough the only class he struggled in was English. So they tasked me with afterhours tutoring.”
“This sounds like the start to a porn film.” Ame laughed as she said this. Chris smiled. If Ame could have seen inside his head she wouldn’t be laughing. Him and Daniel and sex was suddenly very close to the front of his thoughts.
“He was younger than me and from completely the opposite side of the campus.
And he literally slept with anything that moved, girls and boys. So he was something well outside my comfort zone. I used to watch him. I know that sounds kinda creepy, but I would watch him when he was studying to see if I could get my head around why someone so pretty, so strong, so funny would need to sleep around. I never actually understood it. Anyway, unrequited lust, etcetera and so on. I left at the end of his first year, my final year, and I haven’t heard from him since.”
“Awww,” Ame said. Great, she was using her cute voice, the one that Chris feared. “So how many years later now? He walks into this coffee shop and finds you.
Oh my “—she pressed a hand against her chest—”how cute is that.”
What was it with girls finding gay guys and what they got up to cute? He was sure as hell that she wouldn’t find it cute if she walked in on him and a man going at it the way he wanted to with Daniel. Even with the wine having its usual effect on his libido, he was getting hard at the thought of being on all fours on this bed with Daniel inside him, marking him, wanting him. He wriggled to get comfortable, his damn prick was getting caught in jersey material, and he really needed to do a repo on the source of his discomfort.
“Did you ever get it on at college?” Ame leaned forward, a slice of pizza in one hand, half a glass of red in the other, and an avaricious gleam in her eye. What, she wanted details?
“We kissed once.”
“Tell me more.”
“We were drunk…” His voice trailed off as he yet again remembered the alcohol-fueled kiss.
“Default college setting,” Ame interjected.
“Yeah, well. I never drank much even then and two glasses and I was anyone’s. So four beers and a bottle each of brandy and bourbon and I was fucked. Seriously off my head. I was on my own with Daniel. We kissed. It was epic.”
“Really?” Ame said dreamily.
“No!” Chris said with a laugh. “Far from epic. I don’t remember much about it at all. It was just one of those drunken things. He avoided me the rest of the semester except for tutoring and we never talked about it.”
“Oh.” Ame sounded deflated. What did she want? A storybook gay romance? Like that was going to happen. “But,” she continued, “he’s back and I’m thinking he’s interested.”
“Ame, I say again, he fucked the entire campus—any girl or boy, gay or bi—in a year. Yet he didn’t go anywhere near me. What does that tell you?”
She considered his question for a moment and chewed on a bite of pizza.
Swallowing a mouthful of wine, she delivered her expert opinion.
“He was saving himself for you. Or you for himself. Or whatever.” She laughed and it was infectious and suddenly, pizza and wine forgotten, Chris and Ame were laughing until they cried.
It was a hell of an evening and just what he needed to help him forget.
Chapter 4
Monday, November 26th
Not for the first time Chris wondered why the hell had he agreed to meet Daniel.
The clock read two forty-five and he stood in front of the full-length mirror in his room, staring blankly at his reflection.
What is my problem? Why am I such an idiot?
It wasn’t like he was ugly, but then he wasn’t classically handsome; he was just normal looking. A slim figure, dark hair, and a square chin. When he had once stopped shaving for a while, an ex-boyfriend had even called him somewhat ruggedly handsome. His eyes were his best feature; he didn’t need anyone to actually tell him that. They were a soft brown and framed with eyelashes that his mom said women would murder for. His last boyfriend had commented more than once though that it wasn’t Chris’s eyes that were his favorite, but it was in fact his lips. He added how especially nice they looked when those lips were busy around his cock. Very classy.
Shit.
Wrong thought to have as his dick filled and hardened and pushed against the zip of his new jeans. The image of a blow job when he already had Daniel in his head was so not the thing to be conjuring from the dusty recesses of his brain. Chris felt hot and rested his forehead against the cool mirror, cataloguing all the ways meeting Daniel for coffee could go wrong.
“Chris?” Amelia’s voice was right in his ear and he jumped guiltily, knocking his head on the mirror and wincing at the sharp pain.
“Ouch,” he mumbled, pulling at his shirt and facing his friend.
“You look nice” was all she said, and he felt himself forming a smile, well nearly a smile anyway. He had chosen his best button-down, a dark blue one that made his eyes pop. Well, it did according to the boyfriend before the one who said he had nice lips.
“Thanks. Daniel is coming to pick me up in a while; he says we’re doing coffee.”
“Have fun. Reminisce. See if you can pin down his bi-ness. Oh, and don’t forget condoms and lube.” She poked him in the chest and laughed, and Chris felt unaccountably lighter for her teasing.
He knew Daniel was bi. The other man had never hidden it in college. He had actually made a big show of ‘love being love’ and of having no particular gender bias.
On the other hand, Chris was gay. End of. He was sure Daniel must have known that, and Chris was currently unattached, had been since the shit hit the fan at the prep school. So, if Daniel was unattached, then maybe the reminiscing could turn to something else. He felt suddenly nauseous.
One step at a time, Christian, one step at a time.
When he finally stumbled uncertainly downstairs, he wondered if perhaps the shop might be so busy that Amelia would demand his help. It didn’t seem any busier than normal, but hey, any excuse in a storm or something like that. He looked for her but she was busy serving, and then he heard Daniel’s voice.
“Chris!” Dammit, Daniel stood there waiting in jeans that hugged muscled legs and a black leather jacket that was zipped to his chin. “Over here.” Chris crossed to stand in front of him, shrugging on his own jacket and zipping it high. It was cold outside and the wind chill could be breath stealing at times. They made their way out of the shop. Chris stopped,
uncertain of the direction Daniel intended to go. Daniel had purposefully turned left, and Chris found himself half jogging a few steps to catch up with his companion. They walked in silence for a while and stopped at a coffee shop called, rather un-cleverly, The Coffee Shop. The owner was a friend of Amelia’s but was also her closest rival. Chris smirked inwardly at the thought of Ame’s face when he told her he had spent money there.
They ordered, Daniel paying, stilling Chris’s hand as he had rummaged for his wallet in his jacket. “My treat this time,” he said. All Chris could focus on was ‘this time’.
The coffee was hot, the muffins that Daniel bought were speckled with blueberries, and the conversation started out mostly one-sided. Daniel described just how he had become a cop.
“So, yeah, joining the force, it was an easy decision in the end, a good one,” Daniel finished, biting into the muffin and half closing his eyes. Chris watched him thoughtfully. Daniel had had it all, a trust fund, parents with connections, and he had decided to become a cop? Not just any cop but a New York City cop?
“What did your family think?” Chris didn’t remember much about Daniel’s richer-than-hell family, only had a vague recollection of what other students had told him.
“Mom was gently restrained; Dad had already given up worrying about what he called his ‘odd son’. His words, not mine.” Daniel shrugged. “They’re pleased for me in their own way, but what matters most to them I guess is that I’m happy now. I mean, I was never happy at the office with dad, much less happy being the heir apparent. What about you?” Chris was thrown by the sudden turn of the conversation’s focus.
Sentences. Small sentences. Subject. Verb. Preposition. Object. Small sentences. No muffins.
“I work at the… with Amelia.”
“Cool… though I guess I expected…” Daniel’s voice had a curious tone. “You were always the clever one…”
“I was a teacher. Of English,” Chris responded, and then he shrugged, “for a while.”
“But you gave it up?” Daniel always had been the one in classes to cut to the chase—go directly to the point of any conversation.
“I didn’t enjoy it,” Chris lied quickly, wincing inwardly as Daniel nodded in unquestioning acceptance of what he had just said. Chris wasn’t ready to talk about what had happened at Sacred Heart.
Daniel seemed to get the hint and continued talking. The subject quickly changed to football, then baseball, on to art and books—anything and everything.
“I have these tickets for the Rockefeller Center thing. Y’know the Christmas Tree lighting thing. In Brasserie Ruhlmann,” Daniel said. He looked suddenly uncomfortable and wouldn’t look Chris in the eye. “Dad sent them on to me.” He sounded like he was
defending having the tickets in the first place. They were bound to be expensive. Chris didn’t judge Daniel for having the means to enjoy new experiences in life. Although he admitted to himself he felt a little jealous.
Chris waited for something else. Anything. Was Daniel asking him to go or was he saying something completely different?
“Would you like to come with me? As my date?” Daniel had moved from uncomfortable to nervous, and Chris’s heart twisted in his chest. Six-plus feet of hot guy was nervous about asking him out on a date?
“Yeah,” Chris said. “I’d love to.”
Suddenly Daniel seemed enthused. “It’s tickets to the Brasserie event, inside, free drinks, the whole thing, and we’ll be only a few steps from the tree.”
Chris wasn’t sure what to say to that one. Watching on the big screen or in the crowds outside, he had done before. Christmas didn’t officially start in the City until the Rockefeller tree was lit. But next to it with the people who could afford the prices? That was a new one. Sitting here in a coffee shop with Daniel had made him forget just how rich Daniel’s family was, and by association, Daniel. What did you wear to an event like that? He only had one good suit, or should he pull out his meager supply of designer labels in an effort to look casual? Call himself a gay man, he had no idea. Daniel was chattering on about Christmas and lights and drinks and it was all Chris could do to hang on for the ride. He made appropriate noises of interest and then gave up when it became obvious that he was simply staring into Daniel’s hazel eyes.
Daniel’s animated face softened into a gentle smile and he leaned over and gripped Chris’s hand.
“I’m so pleased I can share it with someone. I swapped to get the night off and I’m back on shift at one am, but we could have a good evening.”
Chris nodded. “I’ve never been that close to the tree before,” he admitted.
Daniel briefly tightened his grip at this statement and then continued chatting and reminiscing. Time flew by until Daniel and Chris walked back to Amelia’s early in the evening. When they arrived outside, Chris wasn’t sure what was going to happen. Had this been a date? The tree thing was a date, but could four hours in a coffee shop be considered a date? Was Daniel going to kiss him? Should he make the first move? It wasn’t just up to Daniel to lead this; Chris was capable of initiating a kiss. He chickened out at the last minute as Daniel pulled him in for a quick, manly back-slapping hug and then stepped back, smiling.
“Maybe we could do this again? Just talking. It was good,” Daniel suggested and Chris found himself agreeing.
In the next breath he was standing alone outside Amelia’s, feeling thankful he had actually made it through the whole coffee kind-of-date without making a fool of himself by proclaiming his undying lust for Daniel.
It was a strangely anticlimactic end to the day. He stood lost in thought as someone moved into his personal space. Someone tall and imposing. Daniel? What the hell was it with this man and his freaking coming back all the time?
“I forgot something,” Daniel said carefully. Gently. Hesitantly.
“What?” Chris was proud of himself for managing to at least get one word out as Daniel stepped even closer. Daniel leaned down from his half a foot height advantage and placed a tender kiss on Chris’s cold lips, nothing more than a slight touch, but it was enough for Chris to chase for more.
Daniel moved back with a smile. “I’ll come by for you at four? Can you get away then? I never thought to ask.”
Chris considered it. Ame would be pushing him out the door for anything remotely close to a social life. “I can,” Chris answered.
“Wednesday then,” Daniel half whispered and then turned to leave. Chris touched his lips—certain he could still feel the kiss.
Smiling like a fool, he fumbled for the knob of Amelia’s door and stepped inside.
A second later, acting on a whim, he poked his head back out and looked down the sidewalk to where Daniel stood, looking back. The cop waved, and Chris waved back before retreating back into the warmth.
* * * *
Daniel felt unaccountably lighter. Not only had he just gotten through hours of talking without molesting Chris but he had made a date for the tree lighting. This was going to be different. Daniel was going to do this right if it killed him. When he reached the precinct and dressed, he still couldn’t get the taste of Chris out of his head. The kiss had been so brief, and god, he’d wanted so much more, but he’d held back. There was no way he was going to come on strong and scare the guy of his dreams away.
“You awake there?” Mikey asked as he poked Daniel in the center of his chest.
“More than you will ever be,” Daniel replied quickly.
“Leave my partner alone,” Alex interrupted. Then he leaned in to pet Daniel exactly where Mikey had poked him. “He’s a delicate gay flower you know.”
Daniel snorted a laugh. At six five he was hardly a delicate freaking flower.
“You’re dead, Alex. Next time someone comes at us with a gun I am so using you for cover.”
“You’re like an old married couple,” Mikey pointed out. He was tightening his belt and had a wide grin on his face.
“Less of the old,” Daniel said.
“Later,” Mikey said and left them alone in the locker room.
“Are we going back for more muffins tomorrow? I want to take one home to Emma,” Alex asked as he checked his weapon and slid it into the holster, ensuring it was secured.
“If anyone is going to take one of those muffins to my goddaughter it will be me,”
Daniel deadpanned.
On his first day out of the academy he had been partnered with Alex Strachen, happily married guy, and suddenly Daniel had a brand new family. He’d come into Alex and Kathy’s lives just before Emma had been born and she had not long ago turned three.
“You spoil her.”
“It’s in the job description.” Emma, cute as a button, was the apple of her mom and dad’s eye, but Daniel was damn good at his role as well. “Speaking of which, I still want to babysit so you can get a night off somewhere.”
Alex smiled and closed his locker door with a resounding crash. He locked it and then turned to lean against the door.
“I’ll work out something, get Kathy to agree a date night, but you know she’s so tired. And she’s all ‘I’m so fat’ and doesn’t listen to a thing I say.”
“Being seven months pregnant does that,” Daniel said. “Look, I’ll organize a night in a nice hotel, spa, everything, a really nice room, and I can come stay at yours.” He knew what Alex was going to say. The sudden defensiveness was written all over his friend’s face. But hell, Daniel didn’t get to use his family very often, why wouldn’t he use it on the man who was more like a brother than work partner.
“Daniel—”
He held up a hand. “I know what you are going to say, but it’s cool. What’s the point of my family owning hotels if I can’t pull strings? Anyway, getting to spend a whole night with Em makes me happy.”
New York Christmas Page 3