by Nadia Lee
Fairy Godmother nodded. "She's right."
The Beast's massive shoulders were hunched in frustration, and Melinda felt guilty again. This was the second time she'd caused him unhappiness, but she couldn't let him come with her. He would be an obstacle. But she could make it up to him by finding Beauty as soon as possible.
The Beast looked at Fairy Godmother grimly. "May we talk privately for a moment?"
"Of course." She turned to the remaining three in the room. "Excuse us."
*** *** ***
They went into the soundproof antechamber next to the meeting room. It was sparsely furnished, with walls covered by thick and dreadfully dull books, but the high glass ceiling made the place seem airy. Fairy Godmother sat in one of the chairs at a small circular table, and Edward shut the door and faced her. "Mother, why are you opposing me?"
"Was I, dear? I didn't realize."
He prayed for patience. Mother could be so frustratingly dense at times. He was sure it was intentional...and people wondered why he had a temper. "Have I ever asked you for a favor?"
She frowned. "Not that I can recall."
"That's right. Not when I was cursed--"
"Well, the curse. Perhaps you shouldn't have called her Auntie Beet."
"It was the truth! And I was only nine!"
"Of course, dear." Fairy Godmother made a vague gesture. "Do go on."
"Stop humoring me. Why are you on her side? It's not as if you like her."
"She is still my sister, and she is occasionally capable of being pleasant."
"As pleasant as Charming," he muttered.
She beamed. "Yes! Such a delightful boy."
"You mean annoying."
Fairy Godmother sighed. "Do get to the point, dear."
"Of course. The point. The point, as you say, is that I have never asked you for favors, not even when Beauty's evil sisters sent murdering townspeople my way. I endured all the hardships, all the obstacles, in order to earn her love."
"So you did. Quite admirable."
"Thank you." At least his mother was somewhat reasonable -- for a woman -- unlike his witchy aunt. "But surely you realize the current situation is untenable. This Lightfoot trespasser is untrustworthy, and I cannot put my fate in her hands. Without Beauty I can never regain my human form, and Aunt will triumph."
"I understand, but Miss Lightfoot has a valid objection. Her world is not like ours. It has lost much of its magic. Most people there don't even believe that happy endings are possible."
Edward stiffened with shock. "Blasphemy! How can people not believe in happy endings?"
"Well, that would be your aunt's influence." She sighed. "This is why I cannot risk a failure. If she wins, the fairy tales will be no more, and all the happily-ever-afters will vanish. Miss Lightfoot must succeed, and I'm afraid your presence will hinder her."
"You are the most powerful fairy in our world. Surely there's something you can do so that I can go."
"The curse isn't something I can undo," she said primly. "You know what's in the Seventeenth Neverland Magical Accord as well as I do."
He wanted to hit something. Better yet, someone. Even better yet, his aunt. "I'll sacrifice anything to go. Please."
The silence stretched. Edward didn't dare say a word, lest he prejudice his mother against his cause.
Finally she said, "Are you sure?" She held up a finger. "Once done, it cannot be undone, you know."
He nodded. He had to break free from the curse. He couldn't let his aunt win. And he certainly wasn't going to allow the clumsy Lightfoot to destroy his only chance.
"Very well, then." His mother rose. "We shall do it your way."
*** *** ***
Melinda waited for Fairy Godmother and the Beast to return from their little timeout. The judge and prosecutor sat down and didn't have the courtesy to offer her a seat. She didn't bother asking; the chairs looked really uncomfortable. The men whispered furiously, hands held in front of their mouths like schoolgirls, and occasionally they would either nod or shake their heads so vigorously that the judge's powered wig almost fell off.
The door opened, and Fairy Godmother and the Beast reentered the chamber. The men jumped to their feet.
"I have made my decision," Fairy Godmother announced. "Miss Lightfoot, His Highness the Beast has the right to accompany you, as Beauty is his key to victory over the Evil Witch. Thus, I will allow him to go."
Melinda groaned with dismay.
"However, your concern too is valid, and it will be in no one's interests if his appearance is a burden. Therefore, I will put a spell on him to restore his true form for three days. Both of you must work together to bring Beauty and the Evil Witch back to us before the magic wears off." Fairy Godmother turned to the Beast. "There is a caveat to my aid. You cannot allow Beauty to see your true form while you are in Miss Lightfoot's world. If she does, the Evil Witch can change the conditions required to break her curse."
The Beast's voice grumbled, "I understand."
"Further note that if you fail to bring Beauty and the Evil Witch back in three days, the division between our worlds will grow weak against the magic beacon the Evil Witch set when she left the Fairy Tale World. Once the beacon is firmly established, she will be able to flit in and out of your world, Miss Lightfoot, and will undoubtedly use her formidable magic to bring misery upon everyone. Nor will I be able to stop her, since the people of your world believe in tragic endings more readily than happy ones, and I will not be able to enter your world at will."
This was getting worse and worse. Not only was she going to cause misery in the Fairy Tale World, she was going to bring the chief creator of all heartaches and troubles to hers. How was she going to live it down if the Evil Witch cursed her friends, coworkers, neighbors and students? Life was already difficult enough; people didn't need more complications and curses.
And what about herself?
Melinda had always imagined that there was a Prince Charming out there for her, even though they hadn't met yet. With the Evil Witch running around free, the probability of her own happily ever after was nil. The Evil Witch didn't seem like the grateful type.
"Miss Lightfoot, I have also decided to give you a bit of magical help in your quest." Fairy Godmother gestured at Melinda's watch, and stardust shimmered briefly across the gap. "Your time device will tell you where the Evil Witch is so long as the sun is up. The Evil Witch is exceptionally powerful in your world, and I'm afraid my magic simply isn't strong enough to help you during the night, when my influence is at its weakest. When you're ready to return with His Highness the Beast, Beauty and the Evil Witch, make sure to be in the same room with them. Then tap the time device three times and say 'Happily ever after'. Understood?"
Melinda nodded.
"Now, Miss Lightfoot, you must promise to bring Beauty and the Evil Witch to our world within three days."
Melinda mounted a stand next to the prosecutor and raised her hand. "I swear to bring Beauty and the Evil Witch to your world within three days."
"Very well." Fairy Godmother nodded. "I wish you luck."
All the air left Melinda's lungs, suffocating her, and darkness swarm over her vision. She felt her legs crumble beneath her.
The last thing Melinda saw was Fairy Godmother's gentle smile as everything went black.
*** *** ***
Melinda gasped and blinked, trying to focus on a white blankness far from her. After a moment she realized the whiteness was actually a ceiling. The bedside lamps glowed soft gold, and she was...she felt the soft sheets under her palms and noticed the half-read Beauty and the Beast storybook lying face-down on the bedside table. The clock said 10:00 p.m. Right about the time she'd fallen asleep and entered the fairy tale. Oh thank God! She was finally awake from her nightmare! No more strange critters calling her Fairy Tale Killer. No more twitchy porcupines trying to intimidate her with swagger sticks. And no more barren cell without lights or running water.
"What a creepy dream,"
she muttered.
"That was no dream, Clumsyfoot!"
She yelped and jackknifed up at the low baritone voice. Despite its aggrieved tone, it held a delicious chocolate heat that cut through her surprise and sent shivers all the way down to her toes. She glanced up and saw the most arresting man she'd ever beheld. He was tall, at least six-foot-six, and a wild mane of hair cascaded down his back like golden silk. A simple pale green shirt hung from his massive shoulders, intensifying the emerald of his eyes. Too bad he sported a nasty I-would-kill-you-if-I-could scowl. Otherwise he could've been the exact image of the Prince Charming she'd held in her mind for so long.
"Who are you?" she squeaked.
"Edward."
"Edward who?"
"Doesn't anybody remember my real name?" His eyes glowed with annoyance. "The Beast. You already forgot about your vow to Fairy Godmother, didn't you?" When she stared at him mutely, he struck his open palm with a fist. "I knew it!"
She rubbed her eyes and looked again. He didn't disappear. She was glad she wasn't standing up, because her knees would probably have given way. "It wasn't a dream?"
"Oh no." He bared his straight white teeth in something that might've passed for a smile if he'd actually tried to look friendly. "This is very real, and I'm not going anywhere until you help me find Beauty and my dear aunt."
"Your aunt?"
"Didn't you know? The Evil Witch is my aunt."
"No wonder you're so charming."
Edward made a face. "Good Lord no. Don't confuse me with Charming."
"Huh?"
"He's my annoying twin."
A mild headache began knocking inside Melinda's temples. "Identical?"
"Technically. But of course I'm the more handsome."
It was just her luck. All the good-looking men she met were either married, gay or in touch with their inner Narcissus. She wanted to bang her head into her pillows -- never against the wall because it would hurt too much. "What a huge mistake."
"Indeed. You should've stayed in your world, so my aunt couldn't have escaped. Your inconsiderate and foolhardy actions have caused all of us many problems."
"Not that." She glared at him. "I should never have complained about your looks. Then you would've stayed a Beast."
III. In Which Our Sleep-Deprived Heroine Breaks Into Tudor Land
Melinda buried her head into her pillows at the loud banging on her door. There was a noise pollution ordinance in her neighborhood, and if whoever was causing the ruckus didn't stop soon, she was going to call the police.
The door burst open. Heart pounding, she sat up, pulling the covers closer to her chest like a shield. Was it a burglar? Some kind of killer? Oh gosh, maybe her mother had been right about getting a Micro-Uzi for home defense...
The Beast -- er, Edward -- strode inside. "I tried to summon your maid to wake you up, but I couldn't find her anywhere. Regardless, it is time."
The tension dissipated, although a bit of adrenaline remained. She glanced at the bedside clock radio. 5:43 a.m.
"Time to continue sleeping."
She flopped back on the bed with her back turned to him and wrapped the sheets around herself tightly. Fairy Godmother had said the watch needed some sun to locate the Wicked Witch. Melinda had planned to take full advantage of the night and freshen up before she faced the daunting task of getting everyone in one room within three days.
"Sleep? What utter nonsense. It is a glorious morning." He pushed the curtains from the windows, revealing what might possibly have been a slight lightening of the blackness outside. "Look!"
"What it is, is the crack of dawn," she mumbled. Her brain never worked well this early in the morning, especially without a jolt of caffeine. It was a miracle she could string words together to make sense. "You understand? Dawn's crack. I'm going back to sleep, and I advise you do the same."
"I am not sleepy."
Melinda counted backward from five. Her students tested her patience at times, but never this early. "Maybe you have some kind of Fairy Tale jetlag, but I don't."
He sat on her bed, and the mattress sank so much she threatened to roll into him. "Come!" He took her wrist, then the other, his touch surprisingly gentle as his callused skin caressed her forearms. All irritation fled at the contact, leaving her in a suspended mode, waiting and wondering where he would put his hands next. Suddenly he went still and whispered, "It's gone."
She opened her eyes. "Huh?"
He was staring at her wrist. "Your magic time-telling device." He jumped off the bed and looked around her room. "Someone...the Evil Witch must've stolen it! We need to track her lackeys." He sniffed the air, nostrils flaring. "Yet...there is no sign..."
Melinda sat up and took her watch from the bedside table. "Here."
"You took it off...and left it there?" He gaped at her. "What if it had been stolen? Or lost?"
She rolled her eyes. "Who would steal a ten-dollar watch?"
He straightened to his most formidable height, his spine so stiff she thought it might just snap under the tension.
"Excuse me, Miss Lightfoot," he began, "But not everyone is as inept a trespasser as you are--"
Here we go again. "My name is Melinda, and I'm not a trespasser--"
"--and its value is far beyond mere money. My aunt would do anything to acquire it should she become aware of its existence. I checked your house defenses last night. You have no enchanted vines. No illusions, no tricksters...nothing to keep intruders out. As a matter of fact, your home is wide open to anyone regardless of their intentions. When you are given a precious item of magical ability, you must safeguard it with your life. Leaving it there like that while your house lies unguarded--"
Melinda blocked out Edward's lecture, wishing she had that Micro-Uzi so she could show him she had excellent home defense. When he paused to take a breath, she raised her hand before he could start again. "I don't think there's enough sun for it to work."
That distracted him. He frowned and examined the watch. "N. E., it reads. North. East. So it is indeed morning." He smiled -- a logic-killing, heart-accelerating, face-heating kind of smile, something that could potentially be quite lethal -- and her brain seemed to freeze.
You don't poach men. He already has his true love.
"We must leave immediately," he said.
Melinda shook herself and sighed. She knew when she had lost. "Fine. Give me half an hour."
"Half an hour?!" he roared, but his vocal cords weren't as impressive as when he'd been the Beast. A good thing, too. She didn't want to get a hearing aid at the ripe old age of twenty-five.
"It's the Speedy Melinda Special. The regular's an hour. Take it or leave it."
*** *** ***
A quick hot shower made her feel better, but not by much. Back in Fairy Tale Land she hadn't slept well on her cell's cold hard floor, and she'd been counting on eight good hours before they started their search. Still, the primary requirement for a pre-school teacher was empathy, and now she empathized with Edward. She would want to get going too if the situation were reversed.
Edward was pacing in the living room, his movements courtly, precise, elegant, and completely at odds with the shirt and jeans he was wearing. His big hands were clasped behind him; she remembered their delicious warmth when he'd held her arms, and shuddered with an irrational desire to have them on her again.
Get it together before you make a fool out of yourself.
That was the smartest thought she'd had since Edward had woken her up. Now if her body would just listen.
She made a big pot of coffee in her cheery yellow kitchen. The walls glowed in the strengthening sunlight; a basket with grapefruit, apples and a couple of tangerines sat on the smooth ivory counter-top, and several bananas were missing since last night. She usually loved the little pick-me-up of color and light in the morning, the citrus scent and openness of the area, but this morning there was a sense of grim purpose and suppressed longing -- probably only on her part -- inside.
/> "Want some?" she said, the coffee-pot in her hand.
He shook his head, eyeing the dark liquid suspiciously. "What is that vile looking brew? Poison?"
"No." Poison, indeed. "It's coffee."
"What is 'coffee'?"
"An elixir that jumpstarts millions of Americans in the morning."
"An elixir." That he understood. "And you must drink it?"
"It's either this or sleep."
He sighed. "Very well, then. Gulp it down."
"Thank you, Your Most Kind and Gracious Highness."
"Not at all."
She closed her eyes briefly, then poured the coffee into a huge mug and sipped. Ahhh... She felt almost human. "Northeast, right?"
"Yes."
"Could be anywhere..." Then an idea hit her. Edward had come to this world in a T-shirt and jeans thanks to Fairy Godmother's sense of style, but... "Do you think your aunt is dressed to fit in?"
"What do you mean?"
"You know. Is she wearing a peaked hat with a wide brim and some long flowing dress, or is she in sneakers and a pantsuit?"
He frowned. "She eschews hats unless her hair is in disarray, and she favors closely fitted garments that display her...figure. Beyond that I cannot say with surety. We were never very close."
"I think I know where she might've gone. Especially if she came with Beauty, who looks like a Renaissance Faire character."
"Looks like a what?"
It was going to be impossible to explain everything. "There's a theme park called Tudor Land, northeast of here. The summer Renaissance Faire is going on there as well. Don't worry about what it is, it means that there will be lots of people, many of them dressed like Fairy Tale characters. It would be very easy for her to hide, and I bet that's where she is. It even has a huge haunted mansion. The Tudor House."
"The mansion is...haunted?"
Did he look a bit pale? Melinda almost giggled. Maybe he didn't know that malicious spirits didn't exist in her world. "Don't worry. If any big mean ghosts attack us, I'll protect you."
A royally condescending glower snapped back into place. "I am a prince of the realm. I do not require a woman's protection."