by JK Ensley
“We may be here for years,” she whispered, mostly to herself.
“Yes, my love. That is very likely true.”
*****
He kissed her neck and cuddled her closer to him, spooning in the middle of that giant bed.
“How will I survive this, Varick? How will I be able to go years without your touch, without your smile, without sleeping wrapped within your comforting embrace? How can I focus on the task at hand when I know Alzeen is but a stone’s throw away, yet hidden from me?”
“I cannot interfere.” He gently brushed her curls back and lifted her chin. “Are you certain you love only me?”
“Of course. That’s the only thing I am certain of.”
“Do you love me more than Alastyn?”
She nodded. “I do.”
“Do you love me more than Alzeen?”
She giggled. “But, you are Alzeen.”
He rolled on top of her and whispered his warm words against her ear. Normally she would have giggled. Not this time.
“Are you certain, Milady? Are you certain you would be happy with me as the only man in your life, in your arms, in your heart?”
“You already know my answer, Varick. I loved you before I knew you. I loved you wholly in the Valley of Trees.”
“I am who I am. This you know. But, I will let you decide what your eyes prefer, Milady. It will feel gloriously the same to me no matter which form you choose to be the one you first lay with.”
“Lay with?”
Panic rose up and lodged in the back of her throat. She felt almost dizzy.
“Yes, Jenevier. I desire you. I have wanted to know you for years. In my wicked heart, I dreamt you would spend every night of your training wrapped in my arms. I destroyed any hope of that reality. And I regret it daily. But if you are certain I am the one who will make you happy, I wish to know you for the first time. Right here, right now.”
He felt her tremble beneath him. It thrilled him more than he could have ever imagined.
“Say the name,” he whispered. “Who will you choose, Varick or Alzeen? Say the name and surrender yourself to me.”
He unfastened her tunic, relishing in her soft moans as he paid special attention to each tender breast.
“Who is this man on top of me?” she whispered, breathlessly. “Where have you been hiding all these lonely years? Why do you tempt me at the moment of your departure? Do you fear your brother will claim me in your absence? Is that why you have chosen to now be whom you should have been when first we met?”
“When first we met, I asked you to lay with me. You refused my invitation. Do you now recount your denial? Will you allow me the honor of claiming you as my own, now and forever?”
“The honor belongs to no one else, my Prince. My body aches for you. I am near to going mad with darkest desires. Yet, I will leave this next step in your most capable hands. If you know in your heart this is our perfect time, then, I am yours. Teach me the ways of passion and do not leave me wanting.”
Varick ceased his erotic play, sighing heavily. “So, you can read hearts now, as well as fight? It is a sad day when the student becomes wiser than the master.” He chuckled. “You would not dare say such bold things unless you already knew the truth of it.” He caressed her soft shoulders. “Tell me. How did you know my mind so easily, Maiden?”
“I tasted it upon your lips.”
He kissed her again. “What did you taste?”
“Desperation, jealously, desire, fear, regret, love.”
“You tasted all of that, did you? With but one kiss?”
“I did. Do you deny it? I know you want me and I know you love me. But, I also know you wish to enter me now and seal our bond only because you fear Vareilious’s intentions toward me. Trust in me, Varick. I am no longer that little girl who strolled helplessly through your crystal gate. There is so much more to me now. More than I ever thought possible.”
“I remember that day well, my love. You were anything but helpless. I would have to describe you as fierce—fiercely protective, fiercely loving.” He kissed her forehead and then her lips again. “Perhaps our time apart will be much shorter than you think, my dear.”
“How so?”
A satisfied smile lit up his beautiful face. “Because, you should not yet be able to glean all the truths you have so easily pulled from me. Your tasting abilities are far more advanced than a mortal’s should be.” He chuckled. “Vareilious will be dreadfully disappointed. There is more to you than meets the eye, yes. Tell me. What are you, Maiden?”
“I am exactly what you taught me to be—an innocent little girl trained to be a warrior, trained to be Vanir. And everything else that comes along with it.”
“Mmm, perhaps you’re not as innocent as I had once thought.”
He kissed that sensuous spot on her neck, the one that sent shivers throughout her body.
“Perhaps you are wicked after all,” he whispered.
She smiled and pulled him even closer.
“Yes, perhaps I am.”
Chapter 51
Jenevier
(ZHEN-ah-veer)
She trembled as she stood within the familiar sparring ring.
Varick had been ruthless and cruel in the beginning, but at least she knew what was expected of her. She knew where she stood with him. Varick taught her how to throw a punch, and how to take one as well. He taught her to kick and jump and defend and attack and balance and surprise. Varick taught her how to fight, how to win, how to be a lethal warrior. Vareilious? Well, Vareilious was a totally different creature altogether. She could never tell exactly what was going on with him. He changed with every blink of the eye. She had no preconceived idea where his talents lay—beyond his great capacity for sarcasm. Now… now she was to be left alone with this angelic giant.
Her stomach churned.
Ugh… I’m gonna be sick.
*****
“Varick, wait.”
The deep, rumbling voice stopped the esteemed Vanir just before flight.
“Yes, Brother. What is it?”
“Soon, very soon, I will have words with you over the maiden.”
“What troubles you, Vareilious? You have never dared question your captain’s orders before. Why now?”
“I think you know why.”
“Vareilious, that incredible young woman in there received the exact same training as you received and as I received. No more. No less.”
“Say it isn’t so, Brother.”
“What? Does this news trouble you?”
“Varick, tell me you didn’t just spend the last six years putting that innocent child through the same hell we both experienced as grown men, as grown Vanir.”
His gaze wandered to the passing clouds. “She lived through it,” he whispered.
“What? She lived through it? Brother, you should thank God she did or we would be having very different words.”
Varick snarled. “Do not threaten me, Vareilious. I did what had to be done to ensure her future. If I let her leave here ill-prepared because I was too soft on her, and she became a slave wraith, what good was any of it? And just what kind of words would we be having then, Brother?”
“Where is your soul, man?” Vareilious shook his head, disbelieving. “What has happened to my beloved brother?”
Varick looked back to the sky. Much weighed on his heart and his mind. He couldn’t face it all right now.
“The babe I winged into this world, the child I have loved and protected since birth, that same maiden is in danger. I helped her to the very best of my ability.”
“That’s it? That’s all you can come up with?”
Varick turned his raw fury on his brother Vanir. “You don’t have to tell me, Vareilious. I know I failed her. I failed to protect her from that damn Prince and I have failed her here as well.” He turned his flaming amber stare toward the forest, tears streaked down his angelic face. “You should have seen her, Vareilious. If I live another ten thous
and years, I will never be able to erase from my mind that look in her eyes… the poison pulsing through her heart.”
Vareilious held his tongue.
“She could have killed me. I almost wish she had. Do not let her size and demeanor fool you. For I tell you now, Brother, and without reservation, she can best you or me either one.”
“Go on, now, Varick. Being just a little dramatic, are we?”
“I do not jest. I saw it in her eyes that day, heard it in her cold-blooded words. She is the one we were told to search out, the one we were forbidden to transform.”
“Ah, come now, Varick.” He chuckled through his words. “That wee little thing in there? A demon? You have got to be kidding me. Think about it, Brother. It just doesn’t make sense. You have been with her from birth. You took her soul from the very hand of God and carried her here. Hell, she never even knew what hate was until she met us. She was as pure and loving as a newborn babe.”
“You think I don’t know all of these things, Brother? You think I wasn’t there for every blessed moment? I was there. Me. I, alone, know what you speak is truth.”
“Then why entertain such madness?”
“Because you weren’t here. You didn’t see what the training brought out in her. You didn’t see what I brought out in her.”
“And yet, you love her.”
“Yes, with all my being. That is why she yet lives. Had it been any other maiden, I would have slain her while she slept.”
“You are mad. You’ve gone clean around the bend this time, Varick.”
“I pray you are right, Vareilious. But just in case madness does not rule me, your part of her training will be the most important. You must teach her how to control that fierce rage of hers. Teach her how to channel it properly. Listen well, Brother. Do not be slack with her. I know you have genuine feelings for her. I’m not blind. Do not let those feelings keep you from succeeding. Do not be at ease with her. She is lethal. I only pray to God she doesn’t know it yet.”
Varick flew from the hallowed dome without another word, leaving Vareilious to tend to the beast he thought he had created.
*****
“Ready and raring to go, are we?”
Jenevier didn’t speak. She was shaking so badly she dared not even try.
“So, Milady. You have a bit of a temper, do ya?”
“I-I would not s-say such, no.”
“Truly? Did you not tell me just a few short hours ago that you wanted to kill my revered captain?”
“Well, yes. But that was different.”
“How so?”
“He was horrid to me. For four and a half years, day in and day out, he tortured me.” She snorted. “I wouldn’t call my reaction a temper.”
“Oh? And what would you call it, then?”
She stuck her chest out. “Self-preservation.”
“Truly? You’re telling me you honestly feared for your very life?”
Her shoulders slumped forward. “Well, no. Not exactly my life.”
“No? Yet you would have killed him, a sacred warrior of God, if you’d had the chance?”
“I did have the chance,” she mumbled.
“And you expect gratitude for not using it?”
“…No.”
She looked down, unable to meet his accusing glare.
“So… you knew your life wasn’t in danger. Yet you plotted to kill a man you felt had hurt you or wronged you in some way?”
“Well, I—”
“And you didn’t change your mind about this intended murder until you forced him to cave in, give you what you wanted.”
“You make it sound like—”
“Like what? Like a spoiled child? You threw a temper tantrum, Princess. You threatened violence against the one person who loves you unconditionally.” He got in her face then, their noses nearly touching. “Forced him to break down and give you what you wanted. Forced him to buy you the dolly or you would kick and scream until he did.”
Jenevier couldn’t answer his accusations. They were painfully near the truth.
“That is the very definition of temper!”
“Yes,” she whispered. “I have a temper.”
He released a long breath and stepped back, smiling.
“Excellent. Now then, are you ready?”
“I’m n-not certain.”
“Are… you… ready?” he bellowed.
She flinched. “Y-yes.”
“Very well. Shall we begin?”
*****
The next two years of her life were the most depressing, yet exhilarating, she had ever experienced.
Vareilious was every bit as brutal with her mind and emotions as Varick had been with her body. And just as her body grew more powerful each day under Varick’s tutelage, so too did Vareilious strengthen her mind and her control of it.
The raw emotional power he taught her to use, to channel, thrilled her and made her thirst for more. There were no more tears. There were no more temper tantrums. She was in complete control. The unfathomable power of emotions now remained locked within her. By her own will, she could now harness it, master it, use each to her benefit.
Anger produced an encompassing fire and amplified her ever-growing physical strength. Tears and sadness produced a light force which could be channeled into a concentrated beam. Frustration produced a radical form of lightning, one that proved extremely hard to control. Love begat a solid protective barrier that could be stretched to infinity if the feeling were powerful enough. Jealousy always turned into a green slimy mess. Vareilious would make her clean it up with her bare hands, even though he knew it gagged her. Hate produced a suffocating black cloud that stank of sulfur, brimstone, and dead men’s bones.
Ugh, I hate nothing more than the smell of bones, always have.
Every single human emotion produced an incredible physical manifestation, equivalent to its non-tangible counterpart. She had to master and then properly use each one against the ever-present evil constantly trying to crush out innocence.
Vareilious was a stern, demanding teacher. But at the end of their horribly draining day, he was her best friend. He treated her like a human, respected her as an equal. Vareilious proved to be lots of fun. Incorrigible, yes, but fun nonetheless.
*****
“Today is your final day of training, Milady. You have mastered all that I can teach you. I am immensely proud of you and your expeditious achievements. Alas, I had hoped you wouldn’t catch on quite so easily. I wanted to spend a few more years with you. Varick got six. I feel cheated.”
“Ah, but I have enjoyed the two with you a hundred times more than the six with him.”
She winked and tossed a berry at him. He caught it in his mouth, then smiled.
“Truly?”
She laughed when he opened wide again. She tossed him another one.
“Truly, Vareilious.”
“Go on, Princess.” He propped his feet up in her lap. “Tell me more.”
“You have served not only as my mentor, but as my friend and companion. I begged for the same kind of relationship from Varick.”
“Well,” he said while still chewing. “I didn’t wish for you to sneak into my room and slit my throat as I slept.”
“It wasn’t as bad as all that with Varick. He exaggerates.”
“Really? So you didn’t turn into some sort of uncontrollable demon with fire shooting from your eyes?” He comically acted out his question.
“Stop it, Vareilious. It wasn’t like that. Seriously. I didn’t go mad and I wasn’t crazy.” She waved her hands in the air, mocking him.
He laughed and pinched her. “Then, tell me. How was it?”
She sighed. “It’s hard to explain. I harbored many ill things within my heart, within my head. I don’t know. I mean… I was scared. I felt abandoned, lonely, abused, mistreated, sad. I don’t clearly recall the whole of it, no. Many emotions were all swirling around inside me, consuming me. Anyway, I just shut down.”
He took her foot then, massaging it, waiting for her to continue.
“Gratitude, Brother. That feels awesome.” She closed her eyes. “I guess I simply chose not to feel. I went numb, from the heart up. I obediently completed my daily regimen, exactly as I was told. Then, I just retired to my room. After months of that kind of solitude and detachment, it was easy to quit feeling entirely. I shut down.”
“Sooo, what brought on the apocalyptic outburst? You must have been harboring a great hate.”
He gently started on her other foot.
“Actually, I hated Varick for so long, when I withdrew from all emotion, I no longer hated him. He simply meant… less than nothing. He was as insignificant as the wind. I cared not which way he blew.”
“Hmm, so what happened?”
She opened her eyes, smiling. “He cracked my fortress.”
“What?” Vareilious laughed.
“Yes, I know it sounds ridiculous. But I had spent years building a fortress around my crumbling heart. That’s why everything went numb. He purposely cracked it. And… I snapped. Completely lost all control.”
“Then, you didn’t quit feeling for all those years, little maiden. You simply locked it away, let it fester and rot.” He laughed, again.
“What’s so funny?”
“Poor Varick. He just happened to be the unlucky soul who released it.”
“Yes, and I will forever mourn the words I spat at him that black day.”
“Do not. He was the cause of it. Had he simply treated you as a person at the end of the day, none of that would’ve happened. He was far too close to the situation to be so involved. Someone else should have been appointed as your trainer.”
“Or your training should have come first, Brother. Then, I would have known how better to handle my emotions.”
Vareilious’s roaring laughter filled the room.
“God forbid. Had you been able to channel as you do now, poor Varick would never have stood a chance, Milady.”
He tenderly kissed the sole of each foot, and released them.