by Untamed
In the meantime, I continued with school, and Terrence continued to help me with the kids. Terrence supported me in a major way, and we were closer than ever. We could talk about any and everything, and we often did. Regardless of what the subject was, whether I talked about my classes or, hell, even the weather, Terrence listened and hung on my every word, as if I were President Obama. His attentiveness was so genuine and sincere. In fact, everything about Terrence was genuine and sincere. It felt good to be listened to and adored.
What I respected the most about him was that despite his feelings for me, he didn’t play any bitch-ass moves, like trying to pull me from Pooch, even though he had the opportunity. I wondered if he ever would. What man paid for day care for a child that ain’t his so you could go to school? Exactly. At first, I had thought it was a ploy to get me away from Pooch, but it had soon become clear that Terrence wanted only to help me. He felt that he owed it to me from when he got locked up, and he wanted the mother of his children to be successful so that I could be a role model for our children.
Ain’t that a bitch? A man who wanted nothing but what was best for the woman. Do you see why my heart was doing somersaults? But somersaults or not, I was with Pooch, and I always remembered that shit.
At any rate, I was so excited because I had found out that I had passed all my midterms and had even got As. I was on cloud nine as I went to pick up Princess from Terrence’s sister Tomika’s house. I wished I was able to share my good news with Pooch, but unfortunately, there were just some things in life that would never change. So, I figured I’d pick up my baby and have my own mini celebration.
“So, what did you make on your tests?” Terrence asked as he walked into his sister, Tomika’s living room while I packed up Princess’s diaper bag.
I jumped. “You scared the shit out of me. You didn’t tell me you were going to be here.”
“I wanted to surprise you. I came because I wanted to see how you did on your tests,” he said, walking up to Tomika, Princess, and me.
When I turned to face him, I damn near choked. I didn’t know what it was, but for some reason, I swore he looked extra fine. He had on a short-sleeved, button-down, collared shirt, a white T-shirt underneath, some dark denim jeans, and some fresh chukkas. His shoulder-length dreads were fresh and hanging loose. “Look at you, looking all fresh, dressed like a million bucks,” I sang.
“I’m always fresh dressed, li’l mama. You know how I do it.”
“Yeah, she knows how you do it,” Tomika joked, pushing me and laughing. I blushed. “He’s been waiting over here for the past half hour for you to come. I’ma give y’all some space.” And with that, she kissed Princess, gave me a hug, then took the money from Terrence and dashed up the stairs.
“Your sister is so cool. I appreciate the help from both of you. I don’t know how I’m ever going to repay you guys.”
“Well, my sister is getting paid for her services, and as for me, the only payment I need is to see you get that degree,” Terrence said.
A smile graced my face, and I blushed again. Words couldn’t explain how grateful I was for him. “You are too much, Dreads. I swear.”
He shrugged. “I’m just that kind of man. But are you going to keep me in suspense all day?”
The same smile I had on my face broadened now, and then I revealed my semester grades. “Your girl made all As!” I shouted, doing the snake from side to side as my little victory dance.
“Aah! That’s what’s up. Give me some!” Terrence said, then gave me a high five and did the wop as I continued my dance.
“We are some lame fools!” I laughed at our wacky dance moves.
“Yeah, we are,” he said and chuckled lightly. “Listen, if you have a minute, I bought some Chinese food from P.F. Chang’s. It’s in Tomika’s fridge. I was going to save it for dinner, but this is a good occasion to have a little victory lunch.”
I checked the time. I knew Pooch wouldn’t be home for another three hours. “That’s cool. You are always celebrating my little successes. You don’t have to.”
“I know that, Trinity. I do it because I want to and because you deserve it. All these little successes lead up to the ultimate goal, so every one of them needs to be celebrated. I just want to keep you encouraged and motivated,” he said seriously.
“Thanks. It really does mean a lot to me.”
Terrence took Princess upstairs to Tomika, then came back and heated up the food. We sat down on the family-room floor, on pillows on one side of the coffee table, with our P.F. Chang’s and sodas to celebrate my As.
“Let me make a toast,” Terrence said. We both held up our Sprite cans. “To one of the smartest, most talented, and loving women I’ve ever known. I am proud that you are the mother of my children. May you have continued success.”
I toasted with him and pushed my hair out of my face. “Aw, Dreads. That’s so sweet. You are so amazing. Thank you so much.”
He shrugged. “I try,” he said, and then we dove into our food.
For over thirty minutes, we sat there and laughed and joked while we ate. I have no idea what all the bullshit was that we discussed, but as I said, I could talk about things that had nothing to do with anything and still have fun with Terrence.
“Shit. I’m full,” I said, rubbing my stomach. “I put a hurting on that food.”
Terrence laughed. “That’s ’cause you don’t eat right. Pooch have you eatin’ them bourgeois-ass five-star meals every night.” He caught my eye. “Pardon me, but could you pass the Grey Poupon?” Terrence joked in his “white boy” voice. “As if that fool could tell the difference between a cube steak and a filet mignon.”
I couldn’t help but laugh. Terrence was a fool. “You know you wrong for that!”
“No, you know I’m right.”
“Whatever.” I giggled. “That’s why you have a little bit of noodle in your chin hair,” I pointed out.
He took his napkin and wiped but missed it. “Did I get it?”
Shaking my head, I rolled my eyes at him. “No, sloppy self,” I said, getting up on my knees and taking the napkin from him. He always managed to get food on his face somewhere, and he never could wipe it off himself. “Let me get it. You still don’t know how to feed yourself.”
“Fine then. Get it. You know how I do. Ain’t nothing changed,” he said as I wiped his face.
Exhaling, I thought to myself that he’d always been a good man. “No, you’ve never changed,” I admitted.
“And I’m never going to.” His eyes were fixed on mine. “At least not for the worse. Always and only for the better.” He licked his luscious ass lips.
“What’s better than number one?” I asked, biting my bottom lip.
“Having the number one woman,” he replied.
My knees buckled, my heart rate increased, and I swore somebody had put the heat on hell. I felt flushed, and my insides instantly started trembling. What the hell kind of effect did Terrence have on me? I felt like I was going to lose it on his ass, literally.
“I think I better get Princess and head on,” I said, beginning to stand. Before I could get up off my knees, Terrence pulled me back down to him.
Now, as I sat between his legs, he wrapped his arms around my waist and interlocked his fingers behind my back to hold me in place. I was more nervous than a whore in church, while he seemed cool as a damn cucumber.
“You don’t have to run from me. I’m not going to force myself on you, Trinity. I’m a patient man. I’ll wait for you.”
I fanned myself. “Um, you shouldn’t wait on me, because. . . ,” I began, and the next thing I knew, Terrence pulled my chin down, leaving inches between our lips. I closed my eyes in anticipation of his inviting kiss and delectable lips, but I felt nothing. When I opened my eyes, he looked at me.
“Wh-what?” I asked.
He chuckled. “As I said, I’m a patient man. For a woman who is so secure in her relationship, you sure didn’t put up much of a fight.”
“I . . . um . . . I . . . ,” I stammered.
“I understand.” He winked at me. “I’m patient, and I’m patiently waiting,” he said, letting me go.
“Waiting for what?” I asked, rapidly gathering my things.
When I turned around, Terrence was standing in front of me. “One day, I’ll tell you what I’m waiting on. You’re not ready to hear that right now.”
“I have to go. This was nice, and I appreciate everything that you do.” I sighed.
“But?” he said.
“But I have to go.”
He curled his mouth into that sexy-ass half smile, which drove me insane. “Do you want me to get Princess?”
“Yes, please,” I said with exasperation. He left to go upstairs and was back within moments.
“All right, Princess. You’re such a sweet little girl, like your mom.” He kissed her forehead and handed her to me. “Be easy, li’l mama,” he said as I grabbed her baby bag and headed out the door.
“You too,” I responded without looking back.
I hurried to my car, arranged Princess in the backseat, then climbed behind the wheel, started up the car, and sped off, all the while refusing to think about what had just happened between Terrence and me. I was going to have to find someone else to keep Princess. I couldn’t continue to go around Terrence like that. He stirred up too many emotions and feelings that I thought had long since died. I didn’t know how long I could keep up pretenses like that, and I didn’t know how long I could keep pretending that I didn’t want him.
Moment of truth. I wanted him so bad. So bad. He was on my mind like the 7-Eleven stores. In other words, he had me wide open 24-7. My thoughts, my dreams, and my desires were filled with memories of my past life with Terrence and the possibility of a future with him. I was Pooch’s woman, though. That was what I kept telling myself. That was what I wanted to believe, that I still wanted to be with Pooch.
I slammed on the brakes in a fit of anger when I got to a light. I was pissed with myself for letting shit get so out of hand. My emotions and my sexual desires ran rampant, and I was confused as hell as to how he was able to infiltrate my heart. Even the simplest things had me confused, like our near kiss. I should be mad that he had even pretended like he was going to kiss me, but no, I was mad because he actually hadn’t kissed me. I had wanted that kiss so bad, so bad. I was going to have to think of a game plan to stay away from Terrence unless the occasion involved our kids.
Once I was home, I put Princess down for a nap and was determined to focus on finding a new day-care provider before I ended up in some shit for real. As soon as I sat down on the living-room sofa to rack my brains about a new sitter, Pooch came inside the house with Big Cal.
I looked up in surprise. “Hey, babe. What are you doing home so early?”
He bent down and kissed my lips. “I finally have a chance to meet up with Tot, so I have to make a move. I came home to gather some shit. I’ll be gone for a couple of days.”
“Dang. On the weekend?” I asked with a pout.
Looking at Big Cal, Pooch smiled and pointed at me. “See how my baby be missin’ her daddy and shit? That’s how you do it, Big Cal. She be missin’ my quality time,” he said, and Big Cal chuckled.
“You know the weekend is our time,” I whined.
Yes, I was pissed for purely selfish reasons. I needed to be with Pooch this weekend to clear out all this emotional shit with Terrence. I figured if I could spend time with Pooch, it would tame these fucked-up feelings for Terrence that had surfaced. And it didn’t help that Pooch had been MIA lately. He’d been so fucking busy with realigning his business that we hadn’t had sex in, like, three weeks. Yes, two things Pooch loved more than sex were power and money. He wasn’t fit for shit unless the first two were together. He’d been leaving at sunup and been gone until sundown most days recently, and he’d been consumed with knowing every fucking move anyone made. His cell phone had been blowing up with calls and text messages from his crew anytime he’d been at home, which had made intimacy a no-go. But right now, I needed him . . . really needed him. The intimacy would remind me that he loved me and that this relationship was what I wanted.
“I’ll make it up to you. That’s my word, babe,” Pooch said, then bent down and kissed me. “But you know I gotta get this situation squared with Tot.”
“I know,” I said, not bothering to hide my disappointment.
Pooch pulled me up to him gently. He held me about the waist as he pleaded his case in an attempt to soothe my irritation. “Come on now.” He lifted my chin so that we were eye to eye. “You know this is what I gotta do. I have to continue this lifestyle for you. I’ll spend time with you when I get back.” When I rolled my eyes from disappointment, he kissed my cheek. “Shit. I’ll buy you something,” he offered, grasping for straws as to how to make me happy. “What do you want? I saw you looking at them new Range Rovers. You want one of them?”
Just then my cell phone rang. Normally, I wouldn’t answer, but my irritation caused me to pull back from Pooch’s embrace, turn, and pick up my cell from the sofa. “Hello?”
“Hey, cuz! What’s up?” Charice said.
“Ain’t nothing, Charice. I’m talking with Pooch right now.”
“Well, I ain’t gonna hold you up. I was wondering what you’re doing tonight. It’s Friday. I just got paid, and I am kid free the whole weekend. I wanted to do a ladies’ night. It’s been a long time since me, you, Lucinda, and LaMeka hung out. LaMeka’s sister is gonna watch her kids, so she’s in. Do you think you and Lucinda could go out? I was thinking of dinner and then going to the Compound.”
“Um, I’m sure Lucinda could. Ms. Ana is keeping Nadia this weekend. I’ll have to check on my end,” I answered.
“Cool. Just hit me back. I’m gonna call Lucinda.”
“A’ight,” I said and hung up.
Pooch pointed at me, with a smile plastered on his face. No doubt grateful for this unforeseen blessing. “That’s what you need. You need to get out and have a ladies’ night. Call my sister to keep Princess. I’ll break her off and make sure she straight, so I know she will do it. Then see if that nigga Terrence will get his two.”
“This is Terrence’s off weekend. I’m not going to burden him like that. I’ll check if my mom or his sister can keep the kids,” I said.
He shrugged. “Whatever. You need to go out and have some fun.” He pulled a gwop of money from his pocket. “Here you go. Go buy something fly as hell, and this is to keep your pockets laced,” he said, handing me two wads.
My lips were pursed because I knew he was using this moment to be able to slide his ass right out the door. Although I preferred to be holed up in the house with him, I’d accept his money as a consolation gift. I wasn’t crazy, now. “All right. Thanks, baby.” I kissed him.
He held me tight, kissed me longer and deeper. “Damn. It’s been a minute, huh?”
“Uh-huh,” I said, getting caught up in the moment.
Pooch looked over his shoulder at Big Cal, who was burning a hole in the floor with his eyes, trying not to look at Pooch and me. Pooch turned to face me and looked at the clock. “Damn. I wish I had some time to knock this shit out of the box. Plus, I have to be careful around that nigga. He might try to watch and shit, and I ain’t wit’ that fuckin’ voyeurism shit. I don’t need none of these niggas knowing what you working with.”
“All right, Pooch. Besides, I like it better when your mind ain’t preoccupied. So when you gettin’ back?”
“Sunday evening, around six.”
“A’ight,” I said, pulling away from him.
“Keep that shit wet,” he whispered, smacking me on the ass.
Pooch left the room to gather his stuff, and I got everything set up. Pooch’s sister was gonna watch Princess, and Terrence’s sister was gonna watch Terry and Brittany. I called Charice back to confirm that I’d be there, and she told me that Lucinda was going. I knew Lucinda was going through a rough time tr
ying to take care of Nadia with no help from Raul’s stankin’ ass, so I wanted to look out for my best friend for life by hooking her up with a new, fresh-to-death outfit. If anybody deserved it, it was her. That girl stayed on the grind for herself and her baby. I was excited, because it had been a long time since we’d done some shit like this. Between all our personal trials and men troubles, we needed this shit. Now I was actually glad Pooch would be gone this weekend. I wanted him here only to calm down my heart and pussy desires for Terrence. Truth be told, Pooch had been another stressor as of late his damn self. A girls’ night out was just what the doctor had ordered. A bitch was due for a few drinks and a bit of parlaying.
“A’ight, babe. I’m ’bout to head out,” Pooch said when he walked back into the living room. “You get everything set up?”
“Yeah, your sister is keeping Princess, and Terrence’s sister is keeping Brit and Terry,” I told him.
He nodded. “Cool. That’s what’s up,” he said, handing me three hundred dollars. “When you drop off Princess, give that to my sister.”
“What about Tomika?” I asked.
To be honest, I didn’t give a damn if he paid Tomika. I just wanted to see where his heart was at. Tomika didn’t mind keeping her niece and nephew. She loved them, and she loved me, but Pooch wasn’t aware that Terrence was footing a bill for his daughter. See, what I knew and understood was that regardless of the fact that Princess was Pooch’s child, Terrence did for her because his love for me allowed him to see past the fact that she wasn’t his daughter. I knew Pooch wasn’t Brittany’s and Terry’s father, but didn’t he love me enough to see that as long as he was with me, their well-being was also his responsibility? Of course, my kids knew Pooch wasn’t their daddy, but they did respect him as a father figure in their life, so did he not see them as a part of his life?
“Shit! Get the fuck outta here with that, babe,” Pooch said, waving me off. “Miss me with that shit. That’s your baby daddy’s sister. Tell that nigga to lace his sister’s pockets.”