Forbidden Passion

by Ruth Gogoll

  “Sonja . . . you don’t have to. . .” Kim protested weakly.

  But Sonja was already pushing her thighs apart and diving into Kim’s paradise with her tongue.

  Kim moaned. She grabbed onto the shower handle to hold herself up. Her knees were already weakening. In her loins a wildfire was raging, that had only smoldered as long as it was Sonja’s turn, and now broke loose unchecked at just that first touch.

  “You . . .” she whispered weakly.

  Sonja firmly encircled her thighs and thrust inside Kim with her tongue so that Kim thought a snake was entering her. Sonja was very adept at these things, she remembered that from the first time.

  “Oh, Sonja . . .”

  Sonja’s tongue became harder, then softer again, sliding out and, like a gentle palm frond, brushing every spot between Kim’s legs, which in turn swelled to meet her and awaited her touch.

  Kim felt her thighs start to tremble, her whole belly, her whole body. Weakness overtook her arms; she had to tense them to hold on again. Her nipples were practically leaping out of her skin, aching with desire.

  At that moment Sonja thrust inside her with several fingers.

  Kim was nearly lifted right off the ground. “Oh, yes!” she moaned. The tugging of her loins strengthened into a spasm. “Yes. . . yes. . . yes. . .” She tried to meet Sonja as much as she could. Since she had to stand, that wasn’t so easy.

  The wildfire spread, consuming everything, driving the heat to unspeakable heights. Suddenly, Kim felt Sonja squeeze her pearl with her lips as her tongue flicked across it faster and faster.

  Like lightning, the feeling shot through her body; she jerked and writhed as if she could not escape. She felt caught in an orgasm that didn’t want to end. Her hands clenched around the shower handle, holding her upright; without that, she certainly couldn’t have supported herself.

  She felt caught up in eternity. The orgasm simply did not stop, its waves flooding her entire body, taking possession of her, not letting her go.

  Finally . . . sometime . . . days later? . . . she was able to escape, let out a cry of satisfaction, and collapse.

  Sonja sat down next to her and waited for her to open her eyes.

  “Oh, baby . . .” Kim still breathed very heavily. “That was intense.”

  “Hmm.” Sonja’s hand rested on Kim’s breast, caressing it.

  Kim could feel that her nipples were just as hard as they’d been earlier, and Sonja’s finger, gliding softly over them, chased hot thunderbolts through her body.

  “Give me . . . a minute,” Kim stammered, still recovering from her first orgasm.

  “I don’t have much time.” Sonja’s mouth sank to Kim’s breast, and Kim moaned.

  Sonja pampered her breasts and, at the same time, thrust in between her legs, where it was still glowing hot.

  “Just wait,” Kim moaned. She reached for Sonja and entered her.

  Sonja’s bottom twitched, writhed on Kim’s fingers, rode them, while Sonja kissed Kim’s breasts and her fingers filled Kim completely.

  They drove each other higher and higher toward a climax and came simultaneously.

  Kim gasped; Sonja sank down on top of her and lay on her breast, panting likewise for breath.

  “I think maybe we should get out of the shower eventually,” Kim said after a while. She laughed lightly. “Or at least turn off the water!”

  “Why?” Sonja said. “I still want a real shower.”

  “Do you?” Kim grinned at her. “I thought you must be wet enough.”

  Sonja pursed her lips. “That’s exactly why.”

  “Fine, then.” Kim stood up. “I’m going to the bedroom. You can follow when you’re done.”

  She stepped out of the shower, casting one appreciative glance back at Sonja’s naked, glistening body, and shut the door. Through the frosted glass, she saw Sonja’s blurred form shimmer like a work of art. She was moving, but her precise motions were difficult to discern.

  Sometimes she had the same feeling about Sonja as a person. Kim shook her head. They still didn’t really know one another – that was why. She knew nothing of Sonja’s innermost feelings, and Sonja didn’t know everything about her. That would change once they’d been together longer.

  She dried herself off, went over to the bedroom, and lay down on the bed. It was somewhat unusual for her to lie in her own bed and wait for the woman with whom she was going to spend the night. But it increased the suspense. Despite everything that had already happened today, she still lusted for Sonja, and she recalled that the night in the hotel had left no wish unfulfilled. She was looking forward to repeating that.

  She heard the shower door being pushed open. Excitement danced across her skin, her insides. Soon, she would come.

  It took a while, then she heard the hairdryer, then she heard footsteps in the hallway that kept pausing. What was Sonja doing out there?

  All of a sudden, she stood in the doorway. She was dressed. Only the buttons on her suit jacket remained open; otherwise, she looked neat as a pin, as if on her way to the office.

  “I’m leaving,” she announced.

  “You’re . . . leaving?” Kim stared at her, startled.

  “I never said I was going to spend the night here.”

  Kim was speechless.

  “I have to be at the office early in the morning,” Sonja went on. “So it’s better if I get some sleep tonight. You know how insufferable I am otherwise.”

  “Yes . . . I know,” Kim stuttered.

  “Shall we see each other tomorrow?” Sonja looked at her watch. “Same time?”

  “I . . . Sonja . . .” Kim tried to collect herself. “Why aren’t you staying? You could sleep here, too.”

  “I hardly think so.” Sonja pursed her lips mockingly. “It’s better this way. You can sleep in; you don’t have to work tomorrow, after all. But I still have to get some things ready for Monday. I might even need to go into the office for a while on Sunday.”

  “You’re a workaholic.”

  “Sometimes,” Sonja said. “But that doesn’t mean we can’t see each other. At some point, I always stop working, and then I’ll have time for you.” She smiled enchantingly.

  Kim couldn’t resist that smile, which always robbed her of all sense and reason. Sonja’s words seemed absurd to her, but she couldn’t think of any response.

  “Then I’ll see you tomorrow.” Sonja hesitated. “It was really lovely,” she added and turned around. A moment later the apartment door shut behind her.

  Kim lay motionless in the bed and stared at the empty doorframe in which Sonja had stood a moment before.

  So this was what she understood by an affair.

  Kim had thought she’d had her share of affairs before, but apparently she was mistaken. This here was a classic affair – they met for sex, and then left – or at least one of them left.

  It took her a while to recover from the surprise. She shook her head. No. No, this couldn’t go this way. Certainly not on a regular basis. When Sonja returned, she’d have to talk to her about it. Before they . . . before they did anything else.

  She rolled over and pulled the blanket up over herself. It didn’t even have Sonja’s scent. It just smelled like soap. No trace of Sonja’s enchanting scent, which had all flowed down the shower drain.

  Kim sighed. A woman like Sonja was quite a challenge, and Kim didn’t know whether or not she felt up to it. Sonja’s reactions left her baffled. And full of desire. She yearned for her whenever she thought of her. Now even more, after fresh experiences had churned everything up again.

  She thought about Sonja standing naked in the shower, water flowing over her, beading up like raindrops, with a smile on her face that was a promise in itself. Sonja was an enchanting woman, like her scent, enchanting and sweet, seductive, attractive.

  Kim took a deep breath. Tomorrow . . . tomorrow they’d have to talk.

  Suddenly, she felt dreadfully tired and fell asleep.

  ~*~*~*~


  “If you didn’t want to play mini golf with us, you should’ve just said so.”

  A reproachful voice tore Kim away from her thoughts.

  “Sorry.” She woke up. “Is it my turn?”

  “It has been for hours.” Jennifer frowned disapprovingly. “Why do we have to wait for you on every single hole?”

  “I . . . I’m not quite on top of things today, pardon me,” Kim apologized.

  “I can tell you’re not quite on top of things,” Jennifer said. “Or to put it better: not at all on top of anything. What’s going on?”

  “Nothing. I just didn’t sleep well.” Kim put her ball down and sighted on the hole it was supposed to go into.

  “Going to bed earlier helps sometimes.” Jo smirked. “Of course, only if you go alone.”

  “I did go to bed early, and I was alone,” Kim replied inattentively. Just as inattentively she hit the ball, and it rolled wide of the hole. She walked over to give it a second stroke. “I woke up in the middle of the night because I went to bed too early, and then I couldn’t get back to sleep again.” She placed the putter next to the ball and knit her brows, trying to estimate the distance. “I just feel kind of mushy.” She gave the ball a tap and it rolled on, but lost its momentum. It stopped quite a ways from the target.

  “Shall I show you how this works?” Jennifer stood behind the ball, cast a quick glance at the hole, which lay at the top of a small rise, took a swing, and presto! The ball was in the cup. “Three!” she called to Jo, who held the scorecard and a pencil in her hand.

  “You can’t do that,” Kim said. “That was mine.”

  “Doesn’t matter. Who cares, anyway?” Jennifer looked at Kim. “Are you sure you were alone last night?”

  “Yes, I was.” Kim lifted her chin stubbornly. “Completely alone.”

  “Hmm.” Jennifer strolled over toward the next tee. “How’s Mrs. Kantner doing?” she asked with pointed innocence.

  “Ask Jo,” Kim replied. “She sees her more often than I do.”

  “Are you sure?” Jennifer looked back at her, her head tilted askance.

  “I’ve had lunch with her a few times,” Kim admitted grudgingly. “In the cafeteria.”

  “I heard about that,” Jennifer said. “Not from you, though.”

  “Jo’s a more reliable messenger anyway,” Kim scolded. “What do you need me for?”

  “To find out a little more than what Jo knows.” Jennifer putted her ball in and then took the scorecard from Jo.

  “Mrs. Kantner has been in an exceptionally good mood lately.” Jo fixed her gaze on the goal, which lay around a corner. “Remarkably.”

  “I suggested she see a doctor . . . for her sleep disturbances,” Kim said. “Maybe she did.”

  “I’d know about that. I would’ve made the appointment for her,” Jo said. “But I didn’t.”

  “She’s fully capable of operating a telephone,” Kim said rather mockingly. “Even when she has a secretary.”

  “You don’t say,” Jo murmured as her ball bounced around the corner and rolled toward the hole.

  “Hole-in-one!” Jennifer cheered. “You got a hole-in-one, sweetie, super!”

  “Against the two of you I don’t have a chance anyway,” Kim said. “Why do I even play with you?”

  “Because you like to lose so much.” Jennifer winked. “Or maybe it’s because you used to play better?”

  “I haven’t played in a long time,” Kim defended herself. “I have to get the hang of it again first.”

  “You have three holes left. We’re already on number fifteen,” Jo said. “Ever since she slept in your apartment,” she changed the subject abruptly, “allegedly alone. Ever since then, she’s been like this.”

  “She was alone!” Kim flared. “Just ask my team. I was in the office all day.”

  “I already checked that. It’s true.”

  “You checked?” Kim gaped at her.

  “Well, you know, that sweet young thing who works for you.” Jo grinned. “She’s really cute.”

  “Did you tell me about this?” Jennifer asked.

  “I was going to, love,” Jo said. “This just happened yesterday.”

  Jennifer gave her a skeptical look.

  “Ah, my little bear!” Jo hugged her, laughing. “There’s really no reason to be jealous, you can be sure of that. Do you know what she told me about the whole time? Her boyfriend. How great he is, how sweet he is, everything he does . . .” She exhaled. “I’m telling you, that was plenty boring. I could hardly get my questions about Kim in edgewise.”

  “You quizzed her? About me?” Kim was still in shock.

  “Believe me, she had no idea I was doing it,” Jo said. “Her be-all and end-all is her stallion. That’s the only thing she’s interested in.”

  “Babsie,” Kim said.

  “Yes, exactly.” Jo nodded. “And she might as well be called Barbie. That’s what she looks like, anyhow.”

  “And you think that’s cute?” Jennifer asked, indignant.

  “But darling . . .” Jo took Jennifer into her arms and kissed her right in the middle of the golf course. “No other woman can ever be as cute as you, you know that.” She looked deep into Jennifer’s eyes.

  Kim had to chuckle. “I’m discovering a whole new side to you, Jennifer,” she teased. “A feminine one.”

  “Oh, go on.” Jennifer looked at the ground. “I’m the same as I’ve always been.” She pointed to the scorecard. “It’s your turn.”

  Kim stood at the tee and tried to concentrate on her stroke, but she couldn’t. Sonja’s face – and not just her face – kept forcing itself into her field of view. She glanced at her watch surreptitiously. Two more hours, if Sonja came at the same time as yesterday. But then, yesterday she’d been waiting for Kim, so she’d probably be there earlier today.

  “Are you daydreaming?” Jo nudged her. “Again?”

  Kim straightened up and took her swing. The ball flew way out of bounds and into the lawn.

  “You love the extremes.” Jo laughed. “It’s all or nothing with you!”

  Kim shrugged. “Today just isn’t my day.”

  “Looks that way.” Jennifer put the next ball down and conveyed it into the hole with one stroke.

  This time Jo cheered. “That’s your fourth hole-in-one today. I think I’m going to have to watch out for you more next time.”

  “Or else practice more.” Jennifer grinned.

  “I like to practice with you.” Jo grinned back, pinching Jennifer’s backside. “Today, right now.”

  “But darling, what will people think?” Jennifer countered in pretend prudishness.

  “That we have the best sex in the city.” Jo kissed Jennifer once more. “Every day.”

  “We do have that.” Jennifer grinned.

  “What was that again?” Kim asked, smirking. “Just friends? No sex?”

  “Yeah.” Jo shrugged. “What can I say? That was my firm intent . . . until I got to know Jenny better.”

  “That’s how it goes sometimes. I never wanted a committed relationship. It was way too tiring for me. But with Jo, it’s – well – it’s still tiring, but in a different way.” Jennifer was grinning from ear to ear.

  She hit the next ball down a complicated green that couldn’t be completed in one stroke. Even Jo needed one more stroke, and Kim gave up after seven.

  Kim looked at her watch again as Jennifer disposed of the next hole. She was getting more and more nervous. This was all taking longer than she’d thought it would.

  Jennifer putted, then Jo, then it was Kim’s turn. She missed the hole on her first stroke and also on her second. By the third, she was already so nervous she could barely see the goal anymore. She swung randomly – and got it right in the hole.

  “That wasn’t too bad,” Jennifer said. “You’re finally getting there.”

  On the last hole she could no longer concentrate at all. She swung her club right over the ball, not hitting it.

&nb
sp; “Now . . .” Jo said. “You’re not that much of a beginner. What are you doing?”

  “I’m losing,” Kim said. “I have been since the first hole. You’re both miles ahead of me. So what’s the point? Let’s call it quits.”

  “Okay, fine.” Jo wrote it down. “Seven.”

  “It wouldn’t have been any less than that anyhow.” Kim smiled uncertainly.

  “How about we go out for a drink?” Jennifer asked. “Sort of get tuned up for Saturday night?”

  “I have to . . .” Kim yawned behind her hand. “. . . get home. Catch up on the sleep I lost last night.”

  “Already?” Jo looked amazed.

  Kim didn’t want to let her nervousness show. Good grief, it was getting later and later! What if Sonja was already there? What if she waited just a little while but then left, because she thought Kim –

  “I have to,” she repeated. “Enjoy your Saturday night.”

  She waved at the two of them, who gaped after her, astonished.

  Sonja wasn’t there when she got home, and she breathed a slight sigh of relief that she’d arrived first. Why was this so important to her? Yesterday, Sonja had waited, after all.

  What was she even waiting for? To be able to tell Sonja that this wouldn’t work?

  She had to tell her that. Sonja had told her quite precisely what she wanted, and it wasn’t remotely what Kim wanted.

  The night before, she had woken up in the middle of the night. Tossing and turning, she had fantasized about Sonja; Sonja coming home to her husband; Sonja greeting him; how he’d hug her, undress her . . .

  They were estranged. They no longer slept together.

  How do you know that? Straight women always say that men want to sleep with them most when they’ve just had a fight. Maybe they do that – every time. And they fight constantly . . .

  Damn! Kim pressed her hands over her ears, as if that would block out the thoughts in her head.

  At that moment, the doorbell rang.

  Kim startled, closed her eyes briefly, then went to the door. She pressed the button to open the door to the building, left the apartment door standing open, and walked over to the living room.

  Not in the hall, and definitely not in the bedroom. It’s more neutral in the living room.