by Jordan Lynde
‘He is a true friend!’
‘Then he’ll get over it.’
I shook my head, lowering my gaze. ‘No he won’t.’
‘Stop. Being. Such. A. Pessimist,’ Oliver ordered, squeezing my cheeks harder with each word. ‘Really, now.’ My eyes teared up again as I returned my attention to him. He gave me an exasperated look, dropping his hands. ‘Now what?’ he demanded in a huff.
I shook my head quickly. ‘N-nothing! Just why are you being so nice to me?’
The question threw Oliver off guard. His eyes widened and gave me a nonplussed look. ‘What do you mean?’
‘Why don’t you just tell me to suck it up and get over it? Why are you trying to make me feel better?’
He rolled his eyes. ‘I may be a jerk, but I’m not an insensitive jerk. And besides, I owe you.’
‘For what?’
A small smirk slipped across Oliver’s face. ‘Everything. Come on,’ he started, holding his hand out to me. ‘It’s freezing out here. Let’s go.’
‘Where?’
‘For a drive,’ Oliver responded, pulling me from the bench. He kept a tight hold on my hand as he began walking towards the front of the bar.
I trailed behind him, staring at our entwined hands with a warm face. Was Oliver just trying to make me feel better, or did his gestures have deeper meanings? Did I want his actions to have other meanings? This was Oliver – the snotty, childish jerk; the handsome, surprisingly sweet, troubled, strong, brave young man who put others before himself . . .
My thoughts were abruptly cut off when Oliver suddenly yanked me roughly to the side. My back hit the brick wall of the bar and my eyes shot open in surprise and pain. Oliver put a finger to his lips, taking a step closer to me, and my heart thudded loudly in my chest as I took in our proximity. I quickly averted my gaze, my eyes landing on something in the distance.
Arden.
‘Oliver, it’s Arden—’
Oliver moved a hand to my mouth, smothering it and efficiently cutting me off. ‘Shh . . .’
I struggled to pull his hand away from my mouth. What was he thinking? I needed to talk to Arden! However, Oliver wasn’t releasing his grip. After a few more moments of fruitless attempts to remove his hand I gave up, letting my arms fall limply to my side. Arden slowly disappeared from view, leaving Oliver and I alone again. When Oliver finally took his hand away I glared at him.
‘What the heck?’ I demanded.
‘What?’
‘Why didn’t you let me talk to Arden?’
Oliver pushed a stray lock of hair out of his face, taking a step away from me. ‘He’s angry with you, isn’t he?’
‘That’s why I need to talk to him!’
‘Wouldn’t it be better if you gave him the night to cool down?’ Oliver asked me, cocking an eyebrow. ‘If not, you might both say things you’ll end up regretting.’
I stayed silent, knowing Oliver was right. But it didn’t make me feel any better. I crossed my arms, letting out an angry huff of breath. ‘I just want to apologize to him again . . .’
‘Do you like Arden?’
‘Of course I do!’
The corners of Oliver’s lips twitched into a half-smile. ‘No, I meant like . . . more than a friend.’
My mouth went dry at his question. For a moment my mind was blank as I tried to process what he was asking. Oliver stared at me intently, waiting for my answer. ‘Why are you asking that?’ I finally blurted out.
‘I’m merely curious,’ Oliver responded with a shrug. ‘You’re really upset about breaking a promise. You guys act like you’re dating sometimes—’
‘We do?’
‘Often.’
I tried to recall any time that Arden and I did something together in a way that someone might have thought meant we were dating. Surprise swept over me when I realized there were multiple times like that.
‘You’re also wearing his necklace,’ Oliver pointed out, touching the pendant on my chest. ‘It matches your eyes.’
My hand went up to the emerald and I clutched it. ‘Arden and I are just friends . . .’
‘Are you sure about that?’
‘Why do you want to know?’
‘Why are you avoiding answering the question?’
‘Why do you care that I’m avoiding the question?’
Oliver shrugged. ‘I was just thinking how much it would suck if the person you like likes someone else.’
‘Why does that matter?’ I asked, furrowing my eyebrows. ‘No one likes . . .’ I trailed off, realizing what Oliver meant, and a startled gasp left my lips. I quickly placed a hand over my mouth.
‘Don’t give me that look, Harley,’ Oliver responded, rolling his eyes. ‘I am capable of feelings.’
‘But, you – I mean, I . . .’ I struggled to form a coherent sentence. ‘How can you like me?’
Oliver raised an eyebrow. ‘I never said I liked you.’
My face burned instantly and I dropped my head, staring at the ground in embarrassment. ‘Um, right . . .’
‘But if I did like you, it would be because you’re you.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘What do I mean?’ he responded in a casual manner. ‘Good question.’
‘Oliver.’
‘You can’t help whom you like,’ Oliver told me, a serious tone returning to his voice. ‘I would have never guessed I’d ever like you even as a friend when I first met you.’
I gave him a flat look. ‘Thanks, Oliver.’
‘But even though I have feelings for you, I’m not going to act on them.’
‘What?’ I said quickly, my eyes widening again. ‘You do have feelings for me?’
Oliver glared at me, looking embarrassed. ‘You don’t need to repeat it.’
‘Sorry!’ I apologized quickly, my eyes still as wide as saucers. Oliver liked me? I surveyed him intently, trying to figure out if he was joking with me or not. He returned my look with a completely solemn one. ‘I – I don’t know what to say,’ I admitted, feeling my face heat up again.
‘Don’t say anything,’ Oliver told me. ‘The only reason I’m telling you this is because Arden now knows your real age.’
‘What does that have to do with anything . . .?’
‘Harley, you’d have to be blind not to realize he likes you.’
‘He doesn’t like me,’ I responded without missing a beat. ‘Even if he did before, he won’t any more. He doesn’t like younger girls, remember?’
Oliver shook his head. ‘Age won’t matter, Harley. Once he gets over it, he’ll realize he still likes you for you.’
‘But I don’t . . . I don’t like him like that,’ I protested, furrowing my eyebrows.
Oliver shut his eyes for a moment, sucking in a deep breath of air. He let out it slowly, letting his shoulders relax. ‘It’d be selfish of me to want you to myself, Harley. Especially while you’re unsure of your true feelings.’
‘But, Oliver, if there’s anyone that I like it is you—’
Oliver’s hand was at my mouth again before I could blink. ‘No, Harley.’
I pulled his hand away easily this time. ‘Yes, Oliver.’
‘No.’
‘Yes!’
‘No!’
‘Why don’t you want me to like you back?’ I demanded, a little hurt.
Oliver scowled at me and the sight gave me a feeling of nostalgia. That’s when it hit me. When was the last time Oliver had scowled at me like that? He used to glare at me all the time. When had he stopped doing that? When had his smirks turned from taunting ones to teasing ones? When had his hard comments changed from being from malice to being said due to embarrassment?
‘I do want you to like me back,’ Oliver told me, an edge to his voice. ‘But not when you might have feelings for Arden.’
‘I—’
‘Don’t lie, Harley. Can you honestly tell me right now you don’t have any feelings for Arden?’
Don’t lie. The words echoed in my head
. Lies never brought anything good to me. But I honestly didn’t know whether I had feelings for Arden. Did I like him more than a friend? And if so, how much more? More than I liked Oliver? My heart clenched uncomfortably in my chest.
‘I don’t know how I feel about Arden,’ I finally admitted. ‘I’ve never given a thought about it really, not while I was lying through my teeth to him. I don’t know whether I like him more than a friend or not. But I do like you, Oliver, and I’ve thought about you much more—’
‘I don’t want to hear you say you like me until you are positive of your feelings for Arden,’ Oliver interjected, putting a finger to my lips. ‘If you find you have more feelings for him, he’s the one who deserves you.’
‘Why?’ I murmured through his finger.
‘I like you, so I want you to be happy,’ Oliver responded, turning his head away from me. ‘Even if that means you’re not with me.’
‘What if I like you more?’
Oliver smiled slightly. ‘Well, we’ll see what happens if it comes to that later.’
‘But—’
‘Since Arden’s gone, let’s go get something warm to drink from inside,’ Oliver continued, ignoring my protests. ‘And if you ever speak of what happened just now to anyone, I’ll hurt you.’
I couldn’t help a grin from crossing my face. ‘Aren’t used to spilling your guts, are you?’
‘It’s a once in a lifetime thing,’ Oliver told me, looking embarrassed once more. ‘Don’t expect this to happen again.’
‘All right,’ I responded with a chuckle. Then, without really thinking, I wrapped my arms around him. ‘Thank you, Oliver.’
He hugged me back, holding me tight.
A few moments of silence passed before we broke apart and headed toward the main entrance to the bar. Just before we entered I tugged on Oliver’s jacket lightly. He stopped, making me run into him, and I stepped away, rubbing my nose – I hadn’t expected him to feel my tug.
‘What?’ he questioned with an amused expression, obviously amused at me walking into him.
‘Um, I know I probably shouldn’t bring this up now, but I just want to know . . . do you think Arden will have calmed down by tomorrow?’
‘What do you mean?’
‘You don’t think he’d tell the principal my secret, do you?’ The thought unnerved me. Surely Arden wouldn’t do that? He’d understand why I’d kept my age a secret, wouldn’t he? Once again, I felt a little sick.
Oliver stared at me for a moment with a blank expression. When he finally nodded his head, I relaxed a little. ‘Arden is forgiving, isn’t he? He was just upset today.’
I slowly nodded. ‘You’re right.’
Oliver ruffled my hair with his hand. ‘Everything will turn out OK, Harley.’
‘You think so?’
‘No, I’m just lying to make you feel better.’
I rolled my eyes at him, but bit back my retort – Oliver could get away with being sassy just for today. ‘Thanks. Again.’
He turned his back on me, waving a hand over his shoulder. ‘Don’t worry about it. Friends always help friends.’
Chapter Twenty-six
Tick. Tick. Tick.
With each tick of the clock, I clicked my pen – a nervous habit I had picked up somewhere. Rain pounded at the windows, doing nothing to calm me down. Of course it would be raining again today, I thought bitterly. In thirty seconds the homeroom bell would ring, and within the next few minutes Arden would show up in my room. Or was supposed to show up. Who knew if he’d come in to help with my prep today?
The bell sounded and I stopped moving, just waiting anxiously. A minute passed, then two, then three, then five. My hopes dropped, although I wasn’t that surprised. Why wouldn’t Arden avoid me? I was a promise-breaking liar after all. Maybe it’d be best if I just wore a shirt saying ‘believe me, I’m lying’ – it’d stop this from happening again.
The phone on my desk suddenly let out a shrill ring, making me jump in my seat. On the second ring I picked it up, placing it against my ear. ‘Hello?’
‘Good morning, Harley,’ a voice I recognized as the principal’s responded. ‘Could you come down to my office? We need to talk.’
My heart stopped for about two seconds, then jump-started with a rate of 100bps. My stomach clenched uncomfortably, and a feeling of nausea swept over me, sending my head reeling. I had to moisten my mouth before I could speak again.
‘I’ll be right down,’ I finally whispered, clutching the phone tightly in my hand.
‘OK.’
The whole way to the Collin’s office, I resisted the urge to be sick. Hopefully my gut feeling was wrong, and I wasn’t going down to the office for the reason I thought I was. As I turned the hall that led to the principal’s office, someone coming from a different direction ran straight into me.
‘Sorry!’ they apologized, grabbing my shoulders to keep me from failing. ‘Oh, good morning, Ms Allen.’
I looked up to see Zak smiling at me. My heart skipped a beat and I moved away from him, panic rising. ‘I . . . I’ve got to go,’ I said quickly, stepping around him and hastening toward the office door.
‘Wait, Ms Allen!’
‘Sorry!’ I apologized, keeping my back to him.
My thoughts raced. Did Zak too now know my real age? No, he couldn’t – he was being too polite. What would happen when he found out? Would he be OK with it? Or would he get angry like Arden? What about Tucker? Or Joel? Joey? Luke?
Collin was at his desk when I walked in, his phone at his ear. When he noticed me, he put a finger to his lips and gestured for me to sit down. I did as he motioned, sitting tensely in the chair before him.
‘Morning, Harley,’ he greeted me.
‘Morning,’ I responded quietly.
‘I’m going to guess that you know why you’re down here.’
‘Well, I’m hoping I’m wrong . . .’
The principal smiled solemnly. ‘I don’t think you are, Harley. When exactly where you going to tell me you were only seventeen years old?’
My gut dropped into my stomach. No way. Immediately my eyes began to burn. ‘I’m so sorry. Really, I’m so, so sorry. I know I messed up. Oh, God.’ I was going to be sick. This wasn’t happening. But of course it was. How in the world did I think I could manage to pull this off? My heart felt like it was going to explode.
The principal pushed a box of tissues toward me. ‘Harley, calm down.’
‘Charge me however you want. I’m really sorry about this. I can explain why – but of course that won’t really matter. I lied to you and everyone, and I shouldn’t have done this, I’m so sorry,’ I rambled, looking everywhere but at the principal.
‘Harley,’ he repeated. ‘Look at me.’
My eyes snapped to his face, my vision a little blurred by the tears gathering in my eyes. ‘Yes?’
‘This whole situation is partially my fault too,’ he admitted. ‘We should’ve thoroughly checked your credentials. Have you even graduated high school?’
I lowered my eyes. ‘I’m a junior. I have my GED, though. I’m currently home-schooled.’
He rubbed his hands over his face. ‘I don’t even know how to handle this. Why in the world did you do this?’
Seeing he was giving me a chance to explain, I did. I explained everything that had happened since my parents’ death. About how I lost my other jobs. About how I needed the money to support my brother and myself. About how I was only going to pretend until the real teacher came back and then take my leave.
‘Are you going to call the cops?’ I whispered when I was done.
‘No, I’m not,’ he said, surprising me.
‘You’re not?’ Why in the world was he not going to call the cops? Wasn’t what I did a crime?
He watched me for a moment, blue eyes boring into my own. ‘You know what you did was wrong, don’t you?’
I nodded my head vigorously.
‘You lied to me, to my face.’
�
�I’m really sorry,’ I apologized, hanging my head. ‘I’m so sorry.’
He cleared his throat, making me return my attention to him. ‘I can say you came to my office today to tell me you don’t want to substitute anymore – that it was too much to handle. Since you were only a sub, I don’t even have to fire you. You can just leave.’
I stared at him, my mouth open slightly. Why? Why was he giving me such an easy way out? What I did was wrong.
‘I can tell by your face that you’ve already learned your lesson,’ he continued. ‘You’re only seventeen, Harley. Everyone makes mistakes.’
‘Why are you being so easy on me?’ I said, feeling my eyes starting to water again.
He gave me a soft smile. ‘I know what it’s like to go through hard times. I know what teenagers are like. And you’re talking to the principal of a delinquent school – there are students here who have done far worse things.’
‘But I lied to everyone . . . I don’t even have a teaching license . . .’
‘The only thing we require for our substitute teachers for extracurricular classes is a high-school diploma. If you have proof of your GED, technically you’re safe. Even if I wanted to file a lawsuit against you, it would be a tough battle. But things would be different – and much, much more serious – if we’d hired you as a teacher.’
This just all felt too simple. ‘You won’t get in trouble?’
‘The only way I could get in trouble is if I continue to let you work here now I know the truth.’
I swallowed nervously. I didn’t even want to think of the consequences of that. ‘So I just have to say I’m quitting, and that’s it?’
He nodded. ‘That’s it.’ He paused a moment. ‘It’s a shame, really,’ he added quietly. ‘We’ve had subs who’ve only managed a week – some of our students can be challenging – and I’ve noticed some very positive results, especially with the seniors. You might want to think about becoming a teacher in the future – I believe you have what it takes to inspire students like ours. But you have to go now, I’m afraid.’
‘Then,’ I started, just as the door to the office winged open, ‘I quit.’
‘What?’ a new voice gasped.
I whipped my head around to the door, my eyes widening when I realized Arden was standing there. What was he doing here? And why did he look so shocked? Didn’t he know he was the one who had brought this on?