I reach the main road and start to ride up the steep hill, quickly surprised at how easily I manage it. Although riding the bike is easier for me than its ever been, I’m still angry at Jed for not letting me take the car. He claimed I didn’t have enough experience.
Whatever. I would’ve been fine.
It takes me a good thirty minutes longer than it would’ve taken me with the car, but I eventually ride into town. The street is littered with shops and businesses, all in old, rundown buildings from years and years ago. No one really bothers to rebuild things anymore; just add on to them.
I pull up in front of the grocery store and lean the bike against the wall, nearly falling as I try to get off, thanks to James and his long legs. I stride into the store, mentally running over the list of things Jed had asked me to get. Just basic stuff; butter, eggs, bread.
I head to the dairy section at the back of the store and scan the items for the lowest price. A half broken lamp dangles above my head, flickering oddly and causing the packaging on the egg cartons to change color. There’s a woman standing beside me and after a few moments I feel her eyes on me and I turn. Her expression is puzzled as she stares into my eyes and I’m startled, expecting her to look away. I fix my gaze back on the eggs in front of me and so does the woman, but I can still see her giving me sidelong glances. I quickly grab some eggs and butter and leave, thoroughly unnerved.
After grabbing the few other things on the list, I head to pay, ready to leave and still slightly bothered by the way the woman had intently stared at me. But before I reach the counter, the newspaper stand catches my eye and freezes me to the spot. I frown and lean closer, blinking a few times, trying to make sense of what I’m seeing. A picture adorns the front of the newspaper; a picture of me and Jed.
Alarmed, I snatch the paper from its stand and skim the headline; Living Marionette. The name seems to have stuck. I force myself to keep reading and I feel my heart plummet as the words form into phrases in my mind. Unreliable...risky endeavor...possible threat. I think back to hitting the scientist and my throat tightens, wishing I could claim – if only to myself – that these saying are untrue, but knowing deep down that they’re right.
I stare down at the picture for a few more minutes, trying to calm my nerves. Jed stands on the stage, his hands in the air, the same funny expression I see constantly plastered on his face. I stand beside him, looking sideways, and I assume I’m exchanging glances with James behind the curtains.
After a few seconds, I take the paper with me and set it, along with the groceries, on the counter. The man starts to ring everything up but then stops to stare at the photo a moment longer than usual.
“This you?” he asks warily, squinting at the words and then at my face.
My heart hammers in my chest as I shake my head. “No.”
He shrugs. “She resembles you,” he says, although he doesn’t look thoroughly convinced.
I’m silent until I’ve finished paying him and then I practically bolt out the door. My arms are shaking as I place the bag in the basket and then steer the bike back onto the road toward Jed’s house.
8
I’m sitting with James up in his room, watching a video on his tiny computer screen, when we hear a knock at the door. A loud one. My body tenses as we both turn in the direction of the noise before looking to each other. My heart speeds up to a million miles an hour as an image of Head Devere and her administrators comes to my mind with startling clarity.
James turns off the video and gets up from the bed where he’s sitting, heading for his door, but I reach out to grab his wrist, stopping him. “Where are you going?” I hiss frantically.
“To see who it is.” He pulls his arm away and leaves the room. I’m alarmed by his calmness.
“James!” I whisper, scurrying after him into the hallway. He approaches the balcony, hiding around the corner and peering down into the entryway. I stand a few feet behind him, rubbing my hands together nervously. Suddenly they feel cold.
“Won’t you come in?” I hear Jed say from below. The uneasiness in his voice only adds to my panic.
James pulls back and I give him a questioning look. He nods and I feel my heart accelerate faster than I thought possible. “Are you sure?” I mouth, but he doesn’t seem to understand and pulls me back inside his room with him. “Are you sure?” I repeat.
He nods. “It’s them. There’s no doubt.”
I run my fingers through my hair, feeling them snag on a tangle and pulling them out again. “Why would they come?” I ask him frantically. “It’s not like we did anything wrong.”
“Calm down, Pen. They’re probably just curious. It’s some freaky stuff Dad does in his spare time and they just want to make sure it’s not...dangerous.” There’s something in James’s voice, his tone is harder than normal, as if he believes that what Jed does really is dangerous. And I’m beginning to agree with him.
“But I am dangerous!” I nearly shriek, feeling panic overwhelm me again as I realize how true it is.
“You’d never hurt anyone.”
“Not intentionally, I guess. But accidentally...Besides, they don’t know that!” I can feel the adrenaline slowly soaking my body and my mind, overriding any other thoughts and ordering every muscle to run. I think of Head Devere and how she punishes so freely, almost without thought.
“Calm down,” James tells me again. “You haven’t done anything wrong. If anyone’s to blame it’s Dad,” he mutters.
I’m silent while James’s words soak in and calm me down just enough to start me breathing normally again.
But suddenly Jed’s voice floats up to us, shattering the calm. “Penelope!” he calls and I clench my fists together in panic. I look up at James and he inclines his head towards the door.
“What? No!” I hiss. “I can’t go down there.”
“What other choice do you have?” he asks me.
I’m silent for a moment.
“Penelope?” Jed calls again and after James gives me a tiny push, I make myself walk to the door. My feet drag reluctantly as I descend the stairs, feeling my face grow hot as the two administrators eye me curiously as if they expected me to look different. Elegant, beautiful, powerful.
“Penelope, these are two of Head Devere’s administrators,” Jed tells me as if I don’t already know.
I incline my head toward them and smile halfheartedly, although I’m afraid my expression comes out as more of a scowl.
“We’re just here to make sure everything is under control,” one of them informs me. “We’ve seen the videos and heard quite a few things about you.” The calm assertiveness in his voice makes my skin crawl; his tone is almost robotic.
“We’d just like to ask you a few questions, if you don’t mind.” It’s not a question, it’s an order. He smiles but it doesn’t reach his eyes. It’s almost like a grimace; a plastic one.
I shrug shakily. “Sure.”
One of the administrators leads me into the kitchen like it’s his own home and gestures for me to sit down at the table. “My name is Administrator McCormick,” he says stiffly.
“Penelope,” I reply, although I’m sure he already knows.
“You grew up in an orphanage, correct?” he asks.
I stiffen and nod.
“And Jed Orville adopted you?”
I shrug.
His forehead creases. “Either he did or he didn’t. Which one?”
“Yeah, I guess he did,” I tell him, although it was more like a deal. Jed didn’t adopt me because he’d always wanted a daughter; he adopted me because he’d always wanted a test subject. And I agreed because...well, it was the closest offer to a family I’d ever get. Not to mention my issues with the orphanage.
“And you agreed to everything?”
I nod again. “Jed didn’t do anything wrong. It was my choice and I volunteered,” I add, suddenly wondering if Jed might be incriminated for what he’d done because I’m technically still a child.
&
nbsp; Suddenly McCormick shifts in his seat and before I have time to think, he’s flung a pen, full force, right at my face. I reach out to grab it quickly, snapping it into four pieces as I grip the metal only centimeters from my eyes, utterly startled. I flick the fragments to the floor and they make a series of clanging noises against the tiles. “You could have just asked me to demonstrate,” I can’t help but snap at him, irritation slowly sinking in. I’m sick of people slapping and throwing things at me.
“I had to make sure your abilities are legitimate,” he explains.
I sigh irritably.
“So, your life at the orphanage,” McCormick goes on as if only moments before he hadn’t intended to impale me in the eye with a slab of metal. “Were you happy there?”
“No.”
“Did you have friends?”
“Not really.” I shift uncomfortably, wondering how any of this could be relevant.
“Enemies?”
“No.”
“Did you get into fights, do anything dishonest?”
I purse my lips together and shake my head, thinking of the few times I had actually gotten into full blown fist fights. But they were stupid; just a few young teenagers angry at each other for some lame joke or something. They couldn’t really count. They weren’t relevant. How could they be? And then there was the incident. Or incidents. The main reason I needed to get away – what I’d done was so frustratingly wrong. I regret stealing those things – more than I can say. But there’s nothing I can do about it now. I eye the administrator, feeling my breath catch in my throat. “No,” I tell him, feeling the lie burn on my tongue like ice and fire at the same time. They wouldn’t know, they wouldn’t know, I tell myself, but a small prick of doubt forms at the back of my mind.
McCormick pauses for a moment and then goes on. “What about your life here? Are you happy?”
“Yes,” I tell him and I realize that it’s true. I am happy here. Really happy. Happier than I’ve ever been, despite the needles and demonstrations. This fact surprises me and I catch a smile forming on my face before I remember that I’m still sitting with Administrator McCormick.
After a few more questions, McCormick asks me to demonstrate a few things and once I’ve finished crushing and sprinting to his satisfaction he tells me I can go. It surprises me how well he owns the space around him; conducting his business as if our kitchen is his office and I’ve intruded on his time, not vice versa.
I hurry past the study where I know Jed and the other administrator are talking. “...not dangerous. She’s a lovely girl...” I hear Jed’s fragmented conversation float out into the hallway and I feel a pang of guilt in my stomach. But instead of lurking around by the door to hear more, I scurry up the stairs and back into James’s room, frazzled and nervous by my conversation.
He looks up as I enter and close the door behind me, leaning against it with a sigh. He stands up.
“What did they want?” His tone and expression are wary.
I shrug. “They just asked me some questions. They’re still in there with Jed.”
James is silent.
I run my fingers through my hair and go to sit down on a chair by the desk. We wait there, halfheartedly talking on until we hear voices in the entryway and the front door being closed. James and I both get up from our seats and sprint out onto the balcony. Upon seeing Jed’s solemn expression, my hope melts away, replaced by dread.
“Jed?” I ask tentatively, coming down the stairs. “What happened?”
He turns to me and I notice the fire in his eyes; burning, yet frigid cold. Only then do I realize that it’s directed at me and with a start, I frown in confusion. “You lied to them,” he says quietly.
“What are you talking about?” I ask.
“The orphanage. You lied to them about your relationships with the other children and things that you did.”
I open my mouth to dispute him but then remember the question McCormick asked about fighting and dishonesty and the words die on my tongue. I stand there in silence while Jed watches me with hard, blue eyes. I’m shocked that such a small lie could bring about this much anger in Jed. Could create such a big deal.
Suddenly he lets out a frustrated groan. “I spent half an hour in there assuring them that you weren’t dangerous, that you were good and trustworthy and in a matter of ten minutes, you manage to lie to them!” he yells.
I jump, startled by his tone. I’ve never seen Jed angry. Ever. He’s always the optimistic type, happy and carefree.
“They knew everything about your life at the orphanage; they knew you were lying.” His voice rises.
Regret leaks out into my mind, slowly paralyzing me with fright while a million conclusions dance through my mind. What have I done? How could I have been so stupid? But then anger washes over me as quickly as the regret, replacing the fear. Lying about something I did as a child shouldn’t determine my character; the past, especially mine, should stay in the past. “Jed, I was thirteen!” I protest. “I was an immature little girl cooped up with about a dozen other immature little girls; those fights were nothing! The things I did meant nothing!” I say, hoping more than anything that he hadn’t brought up the real reason the orphanage had so strongly disliked me.
“And what’s to prove you aren’t still just an immature child?” he snaps.
I glare at him, suddenly realizing this is what it must be like to fight with a parent. I don’t like it. I don’t like having Jed against me, siding with the administrators.
“It was a stupid white lie, what does it matter?”
“It matters because they were testing you!” Jed nearly shrieks. “Do you realize what you’ve done? And it’s not just the other children, there was something else – things you’d done. Something the orphanage apparently didn’t bother to tell me about,” Jed snaps.
I glare at him, refusing to open my mouth, but feeling sick all the same. He’ll hate me. And he’ll send me back. I know it. He’s adopted a thief. Practically a criminal.
“Would you care to enlighten me?” His voice is low and angry.
“It was nothing, Jed,” I say, about to turn away.
He groans in frustration. “Penelope, can’t you see...?”
“It was nothing!”
“Then why do they care so much?” Jed yells.
I’m just about to scream something else back at him when James steps in front of me. “Wait!” he yells over Jed’s loud ranting. “Why does this matter? What did they say?” he asks pointedly.
All of a sudden, Jed’s anger seems to deflate out of him like a popped balloon and his shoulders sag. “They think she’s a possible threat.”
“What?” I ask, ready to object and rage on about the rude administrators, but James holds up a hand, his eyes pleading me to stop. Besides, something inside of me knows they’re right.
“They’ve ordered me to compensate...” Jed looks up to meet my gaze. “Or they’ll take you away.”
My heart seems to stop and then resume its rapid beating, pounding in my ears, creating a throbbing, frantic rhythm. No. They can’t take me. They can’t. But panic settles over me as I realize that they really can; that I truly have no power. I just got away from the orphanage and now I have to run from someone else?
James must notice my horrified expression because he takes a step towards me, questioning me with his eyes.
“Jed,” I say quietly, surprised at how small and childlike my voice sounds. “Don’t let them.”
He shakes his head. “They’ve ordered me to take away the abilities I gave you.”
“Can you?” I ask quickly, ready for the chance to be just a normal girl again. I never really wanted to be a living marionette and I’d give it up in a second. Doubt flicks through the back of my mind, reminding me that if I’m no longer special, Jed will have no experiment – no need for me. And unlike my reasons, Jed didn’t adopt me so I could have a family. But suddenly the orphanage seems better than the administrators.
; “I don’t know if it’s reversible, but I’m going to try.” He sounds doubtful, miserably doubtful, and it only adds to my fear. Jed looks down at his hands, wringing them together nervously, before turning and disappearing back into his study without another word.
I stand there, watching the doors. Anger burns throughout my body; anger at myself for being so stupid and anger at the administrators for starting the whole thing. I reach up to rub my forehead where a headache has suddenly appeared.
“Pen?” a voice asks and I remember that James is still in the room. “You okay?”
I shrug. “This whole thing is stupid. This idea about my being a threat, the whole marionette thing, the lying, everything! I finally get one good thing and it somehow gets screwed up. How does that happen anyway? How do I manage to just kill everything?” I cry, hearing my angry words slowly fade into the silence as James watches me calmly. I stare up at him, feeling tears threatening to spill down my cheeks, but I hold them back; I don’t cry in front of people. I sigh. “What I’m more upset about is the fact that I let Jed down,” I say quietly. “This was everything to him and I ruined it.”
James shakes his head. “It’s not your fault, Pen,” he tells me, staring at the doors through which Jed vanished through only seconds before. “Everything will work out. If I were you, I wouldn’t be worrying about how to please Dad.”
I shrug again, eyeing him. “You two don’t...” I trail off.
“What?” James asks.
I shrug again, slightly uncomfortable. “Nothing, it’s just you and Jed...you’re nothing like him, you know,” I say. “And I can’t help but wonder...why...?” What I don’t say is that I see the looks he gives Jed, the slight glimpses of Jed in James that I know he tries to hide, to push away. There’s more of his father in James than he cares to let show.
James’s gaze leaves mine and his eyebrows furrow ever so slightly. “I don’t want to be anything like him,” he says quietly but with so much conviction that I’m startled. After a few seconds he notices my expression and seems to understand what he just said and how he said it. “I just don’t agree with him sometimes...” he adds, his tone forced normality. He shrugs. “But whatever. He’s going to fix what he did to you.” His voice lightens with every word. “You’ve never liked the marionette abilities. I know you try to hide it for Dad’s sake, but he’s easy to fool.” James grins at me. “Now you’ll be rid of them.”
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