by Banks, Maya
Caroline ushered her to the couch, helped her sit down, and then she stood glaring at Jace and Ash.
“You heard her. Out. I’ve got this now.”
Jace scowled and then went to the couch where Mia sat. He stared at her a long moment and then sighed as he pulled her into his arms.
“I’m sorry, baby girl. I know this hurt you. Swear to God we didn’t intend anything. We had no idea you and Gabe were together. He’d texted me and said he had something important to discuss when I got back. That’s why I went by his apartment and let myself in. Ash and I both have key cards to get to his floor. Hell, I assumed it was business. He made it sound urgent, so we went over as soon as we hit town.”
Mia clung to her big brother and let her tears fall. Just as she’d done so many times growing up.
“I’m not angry at you,” she whispered. “I’m furious with him. If he doesn’t have the balls to stand up to you and Ash for me, then I don’t want him. I deserve better.”
Jace stroked his hand down her hair. “You do deserve better, baby girl. Gabe is—or was—my friend, but I don’t make any excuses for him. He does what the hell he wants with regard to women, and it’s his way or the highway.”
“And you’re so different?” Mia said accusingly as she pulled away.
Jace sighed and glanced back at Ash who looked just as uncomfortable.
“I don’t want to get into this with you,” Jace said gently. “It has no relevance to what happened tonight.”
Mia rolled her eyes. Typical guy sidestepping the issue. If it had been any other woman but her that Jace and Ash had walked in on, they would have left quietly, or who knows, they may have even stayed and watched. They wouldn’t have given that woman even a passing thought and would have likely patted Gabe on the back.
But it wasn’t just any woman. It was her. Jace’s sister and, for all practical purposes, Ash’s sister as well. Which meant all the rules were changed.
“You and Ash just go,” she said quietly. “Caro is here and I’ll be fine.”
Jace looked doubtfully between the two women. “I don’t want you to be alone, Mia.”
“She’s not alone,” Caroline said in exasperation. “Do you honestly think I’d leave her right now?”
“You have to work, though,” Ash said with a frown.
Mia shook her head. “For God’s sake. Do you think I’m going to slit my wrists or something? I’m pissed and upset but I’m not stupid or suicidal.”
“I’m going to come by and check on you tomorrow,” Jace said. “And you’re spending Thanksgiving with me and Ash. Understood? You aren’t going to mope around over Gabe.”
Mia sighed. “Whatever. Just go. I want to cry alone and not have you two hovering over me. This is embarrassing enough. I’ve had enough humiliation tonight to last a lifetime.”
Ash winced. “Yeah, I hear you.”
Reluctantly Jace rose from the couch and started for the door. He paused and turned back around. “I’m coming by tomorrow. We’ll have dinner. Ash and I will plan something for Thanksgiving and let you know.”
Mia nodded wearily, just wanting them gone so she could be alone with Caroline to drown her sorrows.
As soon as they walked out, Caroline sat next to Mia on the couch and pulled her into her arms.
Damn if Mia didn’t get all weepy again.
“What happened?” Caroline asked as she rocked Mia back and forth in her arms. “Should I call the girls over?”
Mia sniffed and wiped at her nose as she pulled away. Hell, she was still naked under the robe—Gabe’s robe—and suddenly she wanted nothing more than to get it off.
“Let me go get a shower,” she said. “Then I’ll tell you all about it. I need to get some clothes on, preferably ones that aren’t Gabe’s.”
“I’ll fix us some hot chocolate,” Caroline said, her face creased with pity and concern.
“That sounds great,” Mia said, a wan smile on her face. “Thanks, Caro. You’re the best.”
Mia trudged to the bathroom and peeled off the robe. After a moment’s hesitation, she stuffed it into her closet instead of trashing it. She’d probably do something pathetic like wear it around the apartment since it belonged to Gabe. She couldn’t bring herself to throw it away. Not yet at least.
After a hot shower in which she boiled herself, she put on a pair of pajamas and wrapped a towel atop her hair, not caring if it got tangled.
Caroline was waiting in the living room with two cups of hot chocolate, and Mia flopped onto the couch next to her. Caroline handed her one of the mugs and Mia gratefully embraced it, wrapping her cold hands around the hot cup.
“How are things with you and Brandon?” Mia asked.
She felt terribly guilty because over the last while, she’d spent all her time with Gabe. Every minute. Every hour. She hadn’t even talked to Caroline in a week.
Caroline smiled. “Good. We’re still seeing each other. It’s hard because of our schedules, but we’re trying to make it work.”
“I’m glad,” Mia said.
“What happened, Mia?” Caroline asked softly. “It’s obvious he hurt you a lot. How on earth did Jace and Ash get involved and why the hell did you come home in just a robe?”
Mia blew out her breath. “It’s a long story. I wasn’t completely honest with you about my relationship with Gabe. It’s more complicated than that.”
Caroline’s eyebrows bunched together. “I’m listening.”
Mia poured out the entire story, leaving nothing out. By the time she got to tonight’s debacle, Caroline’s eyes were wide and then they narrowed in disgust.
“Can’t believe he hung you out to dry like that. You were already planning to tell Jace everything.”
Mia slowly nodded. “He stood there and lied to me, Caro. I know he has feelings for me. And he stood there and gave me this bullshit about how I was getting too emotionally invested, blah-blah. I wanted to choke him.”
“Chickenshit,” Caroline said rudely. “You deserve better than that, Mia. You deserve someone who stands up for you and who’ll risk everything just as you have.”
“I agree,” Mia said. “I told him if he ever wakes up and realizes what a mistake he made that he’ll have to crawl to get me back.”
Caroline laughed. “Atta girl. And he should have to grovel.”
Mia raised her mug in a toast. “Damn right.”
Caroline’s expression sobered. “So what do you think is going to happen between Jace and Gabe? They’re business partners as well as best friends. Jace seems pretty pissed.”
“I don’t know,” Mia said honestly. “This is why I never wanted Jace to find out. Maybe I was being too naïve, or maybe I didn’t expect Gabe and I to be so hot and heavy into things. I thought it would be simple to keep it from Jace. I guess I thought Gabe would want me a couple of times a week and the rest of the time I’d carry on as usual. It’s also why we wanted to tell Jace about us, so we wouldn’t have to hide it any longer.”
Fresh anger surged into her blood until she was flushed with it.
“Damn it. Can you believe the timing? All we needed was one more day. If Jace had just called Gabe to let him know he was back in town, we would have told him together and everything would have been fine. Gabe was falling for me, Caro. He was falling and it scared the shit out of him. And then Jace bursting in and saying all those horrible things. I could see the guilt on Gabe’s face. Especially after what happened in Paris.”
Caroline’s face wrinkled in sympathy. “I’m sorry, Mia. It sucks. But you deserve better than Gabe Hamilton.”
“Yeah, I do,” Mia said in a low voice. “I deserve more for sure. But I wanted him so much. I love him, Caro. And there’s not a damn thing I can do about that.”
chapter forty
Mia left La Patisserie, her heart heavy as sadness crept into every part of her soul. She should be happy. She’d gotten her old job back. Louisa and Greg had been thrilled to see her and had offered her flex
ible hours. The truth was that she wanted to work as much as possible so she didn’t have time to think. So she didn’t have to spend every minute of her day reliving every moment she’d spent with Gabe.
And La Patisserie was temporary this time. She’d made it clear to Louisa and to Greg that she was pursuing other jobs. She’d work at the café while she explored other possibilities and then she’d take that step out, stop hiding and embrace her future. A future without Gabe Hamilton.
She shivered in the damp cold. It was a gray, overcast, dreary day perfectly suited to her mood. She hadn’t slept the night before—how could she? Caroline had stayed up with her until she’d started yawning and Mia had shooed her to bed. And then she’d lain in her own bed, staring up at the ceiling, remembering every minute of her relationship with Gabe.
Checking her watch, she realized she’d have to get a cab when she’d intended on walking. Jace would be at her apartment soon, and she didn’t want him freaking out on her again.
Tugging her coat tighter around her, she waded through the passersby to get to the corner so she could hail a taxi.
The biggest thing she struggled with was having to return to a routine she’d once found comfortable and reassuring. She hadn’t stepped out of the box before. Hadn’t taken risks.
Being with Gabe had definitely taken her out of her comfort zone, and she’d begun to really live. Experience the world around her. Take on new challenges.
No, the biggest thing wouldn’t be readjusting to her old routine. Her biggest challenge would be being without Gabe.
She’d come to savor every moment with him. They’d had good times. He was a damn liar if he thought he wasn’t as emotionally invested as she was. She knew him better than that. Knew he was developing feelings for her. And maybe that was her biggest crime of all.
Making him fall in love with her.
If he hadn’t developed stronger feelings for her, they’d probably still be together.
After three taxis passed her by, the fourth pulled over and she got in, grateful to be out of the cold. After directing the cabbie to her apartment, she sat back, staring out the window as the city rolled by.
What was Gabe doing now? Had he gone in to work today? Was he moving on as if she’d never occupied a place in his life? Or was he as miserable as she was?
She dearly hoped so. If there was any justice in this world, he’d be suffering every bit as much as she was.
When she pulled up at her apartment, she saw Jace’s car out front. Ash was standing with the door open, and when Mia got out of the taxi, he waved her over.
“Jace went up to get you,” Ash said. “Let me call him and tell him you’re down here.”
As Ash pulled out his phone, he directed her into the backseat and then shut the door behind her. A moment later, he climbed into the front seat.
“You okay, sweetheart?” Ash asked.
“I’m fine,” she lied.
Jace got into the driver’s seat and glanced at Mia in the rearview mirror.
“Where’ve you been, baby girl?”
“Finding a job.”
Jace and Ash both frowned.
“I don’t think it’s a good idea that you go back to work so soon,” Jace said. “You should take some time off. You know I’ll help you out.”
“I don’t start until after Thanksgiving,” she said.
Ash turned in his seat as Jace pulled into traffic. “Where are you working?”
“I got my old job back at La Patisserie. Louisa and Greg are good to me and I enjoy working for them.”
Jace sighed. “You’re cut out for more than working at a bakery, Mia.”
“Careful, Jace,” she said. “That kind of thinking was what made me go to work for Gabe, remember?”
Ash winced, and Jace let out a curse under his breath.
“Besides, it’s only temporary,” she said softly. “I’m going to pursue other job opportunities. But for now I need to be working. I need to have something to do. Greg and Louisa know when I find a different job that I’m leaving. They’re cool with it.”
It was on the tip of her tongue to ask about Gabe, but she bit it back, refusing to give in to that temptation. She didn’t want to sound like a desperate, clingy twit, even if that’s what she felt like.
Almost as if reading her mind, Ash turned again. “If it makes you feel any better, Gabe looked like shit today. He doesn’t look or sound any better than you do.”
It was hard not to react to Ash’s words. It took all her strength to act unfazed, as if she didn’t care. She wanted to yell at someone—anyone—and scream out that it didn’t have to be this way. All Gabe would have had to do was speak up. Given her any sign that he wanted her. She would have never left him. She’d be with him even now if only he’d given her any indication that it was what he wanted.
Instead he’d trotted out that crap about how it was better this way. Better for whom? Because it damn sure wasn’t better for her. And it didn’t sound like it was so damn good for him either.
“I don’t want to talk about him,” she said in a low voice. “I don’t want to hear his name.”
Jace nodded his agreement and shot Ash a quelling stare. Ash shrugged. “I just thought she might want to know.”
She did. Of course she did. But she’d never admit it. She had pride too, even if she’d sacrificed it all for Gabe.
“We’re taking a trip for Thanksgiving,” Jace said as he glanced up in the mirror again. “We leave Wednesday and we’ll come back Sunday.”
She lifted an eyebrow. “Where are we going?”
“The Caribbean. Someplace nice and warm. Lots of sunshine and beaches. It’ll cheer you up.”
She doubted that, but she wasn’t going to be a spoilsport. Jace’s eyes were hopeful. He was trying so hard to help her pick up the pieces. He’d never been able to stand her being upset about anything, and he always pulled out all the stops in his bid to make her feel better.
“And hey, you’ll get to see me in a swimsuit,” Ash said, a devilish grin on his face. “That should make your entire year.”
She rolled her eyes, a smile toying with the corners of her mouth. But she sighed because Ash wasn’t spending Thanksgiving with his family. He never did. He always spent his holidays alone or with her and Jace, or with Gabe. Her heart ached because, except for Jace, Gabe and herself, Ash was alone, and she well knew that feeling now. It sucked.
“That’s better,” Jace said, approval and relief gleaming in his eyes. “I want to see you smiling again, baby girl.”
The smile felt frozen on her lips. It was pretty damn hard to smile when her heart was splintered and lay in pieces. Dramatic maybe, but it was appropriate.
“Do you need to go shopping for the trip?” Ash asked in a coaxing voice. “Jace and I have the rest of the week off. We could take you shopping tomorrow if you need stuff for the beach.”
They were both trying so hard that she wasn’t going to make it any more difficult for them. So she smiled and nodded. “That sounds like fun.”
The relief in Jace’s eyes told her she’d done the right thing. The last thing she wanted was to worry him—and he was worried.
He and Ash would keep her busy through the Thanksgiving holiday. And on Monday she’d return to her old life. Working at La Patisserie. Living with Caroline in her apartment. Trying to forget that for a brief time she’d meant the world to Gabe Hamilton. Or that he still meant the world to her.
chapter forty-one
Gabe sat brooding in his office, his head aching and dull, his heart even heavier. It was early—he was the only one in the office after the holiday—but he hadn’t slept since Mia had walked out of his apartment, so much hurt and betrayal in her eyes.
He stared at the two pictures of her in his phone, one of which he’d had printed and framed. It lay in his desk drawer. Often, he pulled that drawer open just to see her smile.
The Mia in those pictures was the Mia he’d done his damnedest to destroy.
He’d taken the life and joy right out her eyes, and he’d damn sure taken her smile.
He ran his finger over the image of her in the snow, holding up her hands in delight as she tried to catch snowflakes. She was so goddamn beautiful that she took his breath away.
He’d spent Thanksgiving with his parents, their happiness and growing contentment almost too much for him to bear. It was hard for him to be happy that they were on the path to reconciliation when his own life was in shambles.
And he only had himself to blame.
After leaving his parents’ home, he’d returned to his apartment to find it empty and barren of life. And then he’d done something he rarely ever did. He’d gotten roaring drunk and attempted to drown his sorrows in a bottle—or three.
He’d self-medicated the entire weekend, itchy and impatient because he knew that Jace and Ash had taken Mia on holiday to the Caribbean. She was out of reach, not just physically, but emotionally as well.
He’d hurt her when he’d sworn never to do so again. He’d betrayed her trust. He’d turned his back because he’d been overwhelmed by guilt and self-loathing for how he’d treated her. Like she was some dirty secret that he was ashamed of.
Fuck that. He wanted the world to know she was his. He didn’t give a damn what Jace thought. Didn’t give a shit if Jace approved. All he cared about was making Mia happy. Making her smile and light up the way she did when she was with him.
But he’d thoroughly extinguished that light when he’d told her that it was over. As if he’d already grown tired of her and was ready to move on.
He’d never get over her. He knew that without hesitation or doubt.
He loved her.
As deeply as it was possible to love another person. And God, he wanted her. Every day. In his life. As much a part of him as he would be of her.
Without rules, conditions. Fuck the goddamn contract.
How many ways could a man ruin the best thing that had ever happened to him?
Mia was so right. He’d known it then, when her words had hit him right in the gut. She was the best thing that had ever happened to him. He didn’t need time or space to realize that.