by Bonnie Dee
Corinne hurried after her. “Well, good for you. Have fun. He’s the perfect transition guy. No strings, no expectations for a future. Just a good time.”
“Anyway, I may not even see him again.”
“He didn’t call after your date. Well, that doesn’t always mean anything. Sometimes it takes a guy a couple of days.”
“No. He called. And texted. I just haven’t really responded yet. I mean, I did, but only the bare minimum. I told him I was busy and I’d get back to him.”
“Why in the hell not go out with him, if you like him?”
Graci stared at the jumble of colored sticks and the airy spaces between, looking for some sort of organizational pattern, some point to the piece. Her feelings were as snarled and jumbled as the artwork. For two days, she’d pretended she was too busy to follow up. Oh yes, sooo busy with her nine-to-five job and her sewing and TV in the evenings. What was holding her back from finding out where this Neal thing might lead? Probably the fact that she liked him too much already. It would be too easy to fall for a nice guy like him.
“Listen to me, Graci.” Corinne put her hands on Graci’s shoulders, forcing her to meet her gaze. “Remember your quinceanera and how much you wanted to dance with Eduardo what’s-his-name? You were so busy agonizing about it you hardly enjoyed your party. All of us kept telling you to just ask him. But you wouldn’t. You still believed what your mom said about the way ‘nice’ girls should behave.”
“This isn’t like that. I’m just not sure I’m ready to plunge into something right now.” Whether she meant easy sex or another relationship, Graci wasn’t sure. If she waffled on the matter anymore, she could open her own diner.
Corinne nodded. “I understand. You’re still raw after Joey. He really messed with your head. But you have to wade back into the dating pool some time, and this Neal seems like a perfect opportunity for practice. It’s not as if you would have a serious relationship with a guy like that.”
Graci frowned. “Why not?”
“Because he’s a musician. They’re out playing gigs about every weekend and have groupies hanging around. He’s not your type, Graci. You’re built to have a relationship with someone steady, dependable, and with a plan for the future.”
“Someone like Joey? Yeah, that turned out well. Anyway, you don’t even know Neal. He’s not a stereotype. He’s a person.”
Annoyance heated her as, once again, she and Corinne argued about a man. Graci took a deep breath and chilled her rising irritation. “I don’t know whether I’m going to see Neal again or not, and if I do, I don’t know if it will be a fling or something more. But either way, it’s my decision to make. You don’t hear me telling you not to get involved with a married man, do you?”
Corinne grimaced. “Nope. I don’t hear that at all. Point taken. So, are you ready to move on to the Impressionists?”
Graci took a last look at the wild array of Pixy Stix. “Absolutely.”
****
Whether it was the talk with Corinne or the fact that Graci had thought of Neal about a thousand times a day ever since their date and fantasized about him in bed at night, she finally came to a decision. Not only would she apologize for stalling, she would ask him over to her place for dinner. If something carnal came of that, well, who was she to stand in nature’s way?
Sorry I didn’t get back to you. Tough week. Get together this weekend? I’ll make dinner.
He responded almost immediately. I have gigs Fri. and Sat. What about Sun.?
Sun. good.
What should she cook? Nothing with garlic or onions. What should she wear? No outfit with a lot of layers to take off. Was it better to keep things casual or should she set the scene for seduction with candles, low lighting, and obvious expectation in the air? A few candles. Enough to say “Isn’t this intimate?” but not enough to declare “We’re throwing down before this night is over.” Next she fretted about what music to play to set the mood and finally decided she couldn’t go wrong with light jazz.
She wasn’t going to wear a too-tight, boob-baring top like the one Tara had lent her when they went dancing. She searched her closet and ended up shopping for two hours to pick out a simple top and skirt. Red was her color, since it complemented her tan skin and dark hair. She chose a plain black skirt with a little flare and a scoop-neck tee. Trying on the outfit at home, it didn’t seem sexy enough after all, but maybe the wispy lingerie she’d bought would make the point. When she mentally went through the evening, she wasn’t sure at what point she’d have a chance to change into them.
She also bought condoms. As she opened the box to put a few in her nightstand, her heart thundered. She recalled Neal’s kisses and the heat of his body pressing her against the side of the car. A few more seconds and doing it in the backseat wouldn’t have been out of the question.
She smoothed her hand over her quilt and envisioned them naked in her bed, hands free to roam anywhere. What would his lean body look like, feel like under her hands? His mouth… Oh God, just the thought of his mouth on her breasts, her belly, her sex, made her quiver. Heat and chills raced through her. This was really going to happen.
Graci had all of Saturday and most of Sunday to work herself into a nervous frenzy about the dinner and what might happen after it. By the time Neal rang her doorbell that evening, the beginnings of a headache throbbed in her temples. She almost wished the night was over.
When she opened the door, the tension in her neck eased, but drew tighter in other parts of her body as lust kicked in. Apparently this was Neal “dressed up” and, oh God, was he hot in a simple gray Henley shirt that hugged his torso and black jeans that made his legs even longer. He might even have done something with his hair, though it was hard to tell since it was still tousled and begged to have someone’s fingers combed through it.
He smiled at her, freezing her with his laser eyes. “Hi.”
She’d stood there staring a fraction too long and quickly moved aside. “Come on in. I’m glad you’re here.”
“Me too.”
He stepped inside, and she was suddenly very glad she wasn’t still in her old apartment. Too many memories of Joey there. In this new place, Neal was her first real guest. Tara and Corinne didn’t count.
“Mm. Smells delicious.” He looked around. “Your place is nice.”
“It’s tiny. But it’s all I can afford for now. I had to break the lease on my last apartment, which wasn’t great for my finances. I couldn’t stay there after—” She stopped, realizing she was heading into Joey territory. The last thing she wanted was to be the woman who whined about her ex or her money issues, especially when she was trying to be seductive.
She changed the subject. “How were your gigs this weekend?”
“Good crowd Saturday, but Friday’s was dead. Hardly anybody there, and those that were weren’t into it. Happens sometimes. You get used to it.” He offered her the plastic bag he carried. “I brought ice-cream cake, since you said you like it.”
“Thank you. That’s so sweet.”
He’d paid attention to something she’d mentioned at the café. That was a good sign.
She carried the bag into the kitchenette and put the dessert in the freezer. “Can I get you a beer?”
After Graci handed him one, they both sat on the couch in the living room, approximately three steps away from the kitchen.
The easy rapport they’d had the other day, talking for hours in that café, seemed hard to reach now that she had sex on the brain. The heat of Neal’s body so near hers, the light scent of some aftershave or body spray, and, of course, those crazy eyes, overwhelmed her senses, making it difficult to think straight.
“It must be amazing to play your music for a crowd,” she said at last. “I can’t imagine having the bravery it takes to perform in front of people. Like Tara’s acting. She really bares herself—literally, in one of her roles. It must be terrifying and exhilarating.”
“So that’s why karaoke is on your li
st. It’s a challenge for you,” he said. “Then that’ll be our next date. Check off another box.”
Next date. She smiled at the suggestion that he wanted to see more of her.
“Trust me, people would be happier if I didn’t sing. But I’m going to do it.”
“You’re brave.” He tipped his head a little, regarding her. “Maybe braver than you’ve given yourself credit for. This guy broke your heart, what, a few weeks ago? And look at you rising above it.”
She smiled, embarrassed yet pleased at the compliment.
Neal reached out and tucked back a strand of hair, fingers lingering on the curve of her ear. “Anyway, you should sing not to prove a point but for the joy of it. Everybody should sing, even if they can’t carry a tune. It’s good for the soul. That’s what I tell my kids.”
“What age do you work with?” She turned more toward him, and her bare knee brushed the denim of his jeans. Crazy hot vibrations rippled through her at the slight touch. Another enticing whiff of whatever scent he wore set her mouth watering. She inhaled deeply.
“Our team splits up to cover different middle and high schools every day. Since we can’t cut into the regular curriculum, our class is an after school or free period elective.”
“Do you have a lot of participation?”
“At first no kid wanted to sign up to do something when they could do nothing. But word of mouth spread, and the program caught on. There’s usually a dozen kids who show up for one of my classes.”
“Very cool. I had no idea a program like this existed.”
“It’s pretty new. I don’t know if the funding will last, but so far my paychecks haven’t bounced, so…”
He smiled, and Graci smiled back. Such a thoughtful man. A man with ideals, who actually followed through on them. The inspirational sort of person Neal was attracted her more than ever, but also scared her. Could she have casual sex with a guy she liked so much? He was supposed to be a transition guy, an experiment, not a person she cared for too deeply. This wasn’t the time in her life for that.
Graci shrugged off her niggling worries as she invited Neal to come sit at the little table she’d set for two. Serving the meal she’d made, it belatedly occurred to her she should’ve found out how he felt about fish. “Hope you like salmon.”
“Looks great.”
She poured two glasses of wine, then picked at her food. Impossible to rouse an appetite when she was so nervous about the next portion of the evening. Besides which, the fish was so awfully bland. Should’ve used some garlic after all.
If Neal found the dish as tasteless as she did, he gave no sign as he dug in.
“So, when am I going to get to see these quilts of yours?” he asked. “I thought you might have some displayed on your wall. I have an aunt who does that.”
“I hung a few in my old place. I haven’t gotten around to decorating here yet.
Anyway, I think I might switch things up, buy some art prints or something. I don’t want this apartment to look anything like the last one. I need a fresh start.”
He nodded. “After Jennie, I wanted nothing familiar around to remind me of her. But don’t delete all the photos. Later you might wish you hadn’t. You can’t just erase those years. It was your life.”
“I suppose, but right now I can’t imagine ever wanting to be reminded of all the time I wasted on him. I’ve deleted snaps of Joey from my phone and considered scrubbing every image stored on my computer. At first I was sad, but now I’m just angry.”
“I understand how hard it is to trust again after someone does a number on you like that.”
The sympathy in Neal’s voice that might have triggered more tears not too long ago caused a surge of anger in her tonight at the thought of the prime years of her life when she should have been out meeting new people and trying new things.
“I’m almost as mad at myself for living in delusion, for devoting myself to a make-believe future with him while he was…doing the things he did. So dumb.”
“He cheated on you,” Neal said.
She nodded. “Did yours?”
“No. She just left when I needed her most. You should be angry. Get it all out. Because the sooner you can work through it, the sooner you can really begin to take back your life. Maybe add kickboxing to that list of yours.”
Graci smiled at that. “Well, I’m starting cake decorating this week, but I’m sure I can work in krav maga or some other fighting class into my schedule.”
She gave up on the fish and set down her fork, wiping a hand over her face. “Sheesh. I did not mean to go there. You see what you’ve gotten into, hanging out with a fresh dumpee?”
He grinned. “I don’t mind it. The positive outweighs the negative. You’re really cute.”
Her ears burned at the compliment. “You’re pretty cute too, but I’m sure you know that.”
His eyes widened. “Why would I?”
“Because, look at you, with the eyes and the tattoos and that sexy hair and playing in a band. You probably have women crawling all over you.”
“Not so much. You think my hair is sexy?” His eyes twinkled at her, and the bit of fish she’d managed to swallow came back to life and did a flip in her stomach.
“Well, yeah.” Now not only her ears were flaming. She dipped her head to try to hide her pink cheeks.
“I think this is sexy.” Neal pushed aside his plate, leaned across the table and put the tip of his finger on her lower lip. “The way it pouts just a little all the time.” His voice deepened. “And the way you dip your head like that when you’re embarrassed. Super cute.”
He traced her lip lightly before taking his hand away. Her lips buzzed as if he’d already kissed her. Her body vibrated in excitement and anticipation. She was ready to leap up from her chair and drag him out of his. This would be so easy and so right.
Neal gazed at her, his hands clasped together on the table in front of him as if that was the only way he could keep from reaching for her. “I want you, and I’m pretty sure you feel the same. But you’re hurting and lonely right now. I don’t want to end up doing something you might regret later.”
Graci listened and really heard him. He was giving her an out. This could remain a simple friendship, or they could take the next step. It was truly up to her.
“If you really want to see one of my quilts, there’s one on my bed,” she finally answered. Then she lifted her chin and looked him square in the eyes. “I really want you to see it.”
The furrow in his brow smoothed and a slow smile crept across his mouth. “I would absolutely love to see it.”
Chapter Six
Breathless and lightheaded, Graci led the way to her bedroom, approximately ten steps from the kitchenette. The hairs on her body were little antennae tuned in to Neal’s presence beside her. Signals pinged through her nervous system and woke up every cell. Charged with energy and ready, oh so ready, she was poised like a runner on a starting line. The tight buds of her nipples ached to be plucked, and her underwear dampened from the clenching of her pussy. She craved Neal inside her, on top of her. Here. Now. It was about to happen.
Graci stopped beside her bed and stared at the rose quilt with blind eyes.
“That’s beautiful. It really is like stained glass.” Neal stood on the other side of the bed. He stroked a hand over the bits and pieces of color she’d painstakingly assembled. “This must have taken hours.”
“Quite a few.”
“How often do you make one?”
“It depends on the size. A couple of large quilts a year, but I also make small ones for Children’s Hope, a charity that provides comfort items like stuffed animals to kids in crisis.”
“Very cool.” He traced the complex shape of one of the roses.
She shrugged. “I don’t know how much it really helps when a kid’s house has burned down or Protective Services is removing them from their home.”
“Hey, every act of kindness matters. It’s just important to
do what we can.” His smile was too sweet and sexy as hell.
He grasped one side of the quilt and Graci took the other. Together they drew it back, folded it, and removed it from the bed, a simple act that signified so much.
She faced Neal at the foot of the bed, her thoughts and emotions skittering all over like marbles dropped on a wood floor. Forgot to put on the mood music and the candles too. Should I have changed into the lingerie? Too late. At least my room’s tidy and the sewing machine’s covered. Wish I had space for all my stuff. But I’ll save up for someplace nicer. Maybe by—
Neal grasped her arm and pulled her to him. His palm was warm on the side of her face, and his gaze locked on hers with an almost audible click, holding her fast.
“I think you’re pretty awesome,” he whispered.
Awesome, her brain echoed as rational thought slipped away.
He cupped her jaw, tilted her face, and her lips naturally parted, waiting for what came next. His mouth covered hers. Anticipation hadn’t fooled her into remembering wrong. If possible, this kiss was better than the one the other night. Maybe because she craved it even more.
Soft lips nibbled hers lightly, his tongue a feather, tickling them. She leaned in farther and parted more with each teasing touch. Not only her lips but her pussy opened, and in her core, something unfurled. As their kisses deepened, her need to control things crumbled. She gave herself over fully to sensation, until she was a mere bundle of eager responses to his every touch.
She stroked her hands up his back. The muscles bunched under his shirt. But she needed to feel them. She slid her hands underneath the fabric, and hot, smooth skin nearly burned her palms.
Neal stopped kissing her long enough to peel his shirt over his head and toss it aside. And, oh goodness, somehow she was missing her top too. His hand cupped one breast through her bra, gently kneading, a thumb brushing the peak of her nipple through the fabric. She breathed faster.
Neal’s other hand pressed the base of her spine, keeping her close to him. The hardness beneath his fly pushed against her tender, aching sex, and a hot bolt of lust slammed through her. She wanted that, wanted it right now.