by Saundra
Chapter 15
Isis
I had called Secret’s name three times, and she was not trying to wake up. She had just gotten in like three hours earlier after working late, so I knew she was tired, but I had looked everywhere and I could not find her car keys. “Secret.” I yelled her name again. Then I jumped up and down on her bed.
Slowly opening one eye then the other, she glared at me. “What the hell, Isis. You know my ass tired.”
“That’s what you get for chasing that damn money so hard.” I laughed. “Where the keys to the car? I got to drop Penny off at work.” Penny had just started a new part-time job at JCPenney. The last thing she needed was to be late.
Secret ran her fingers through her hair and sighed. “Damn, good question. Did you look on the kitchen counter?”
“Now you know I looked there first.”
Secret turned over and put her face in her pillow. “Oh, God, I don’t know.” She pouted. “Maybe I flushed them down the toilet. Tell her to get money out my bag for a cab.” She pulled the cover up over her head and snuggled up tighter.
“Secret, get yo ass up.” I snatched the cover off her. “Help me find these keys.”
“Dang, I swear you a pain.” She reached for the blankets.
“I found them,” Penny yelled from the hallway, then entered the room. “Secret, you left the keys in the refrigerator.”
“See, I knew they were close by.” She laughed then pulled the covers over her head again.
“Pathetic,” I joked. “I’ll be back later. I’m going to do a little car shopping.”
“Have fun.” Secret’s reply was muffled into her pillow. All she wanted was to be left alone so that she could rest.
“What’s up with Anthony?” I asked Penny as I pulled into the mall parking lot and drove around to JCPenney. It was early and the mall parking lot was already half full. I did not miss it at all.
“Ain’t nothin’ up wit’ him. That’s half the problem.” She smacked her lips. “Ain’t nothin’ changed from last week when I told y’all I was done wit’ him.”
“I guess you serious this time.” I grinned. “I mean this like the second time you declared to be done with him. So Secret and I did not take you serious.”
Folding her arms across her chest, Penny sighed. “Nope, this time is different. I’m done for real. Anthony’s full of shit, he thinks he’s a player. And that crap only gets over on me once.”
I had to look at her. I couldn’t believe how much she was growing up. She was not a little girl anymore. And I was so proud of her for standing her ground.
“And besides, he ain’t doin’ shit with himself. He still ain’t signed up for school, and he graduated a year before me. Now he runnin’ around Miami with them nickel-sack boys on his block. I just don’t need that anymore.” The tone in her voice told me that she was giving up on the conversation. Which meant she was serious. Then she turned to me and smiled. “I bet them college boys fine anyway.”
“I’m sure.” I chuckled as I came to a complete stop in front of JCPenney. “Now get out before you’re late.”
“Later.” She laughed while climbing out of the front seat. I felt bad that she was already experiencing a breakup. But I admired her courage; she wasn’t allowing the fact that she cared about him to hinder the fact that he was not doing the right things. And she cared more about that than any love.
Hale’s Car Shop was my first stop on my journey to car shopping but I left as quickly as I arrived. His cars were overpriced and clearly pieces of shit. I found duct tape one time too many inside his cars, supposedly holding up this or that. I was young and a woman, not stupid. He had me fucked up. Before long I had visited four car lots with no real prospects; turns out they were all peddling a bunch of junk that they were trying to pile off on the first dummy they could fool. So after stopping off at a shoe store to pick up a pair of heels for my gig that Kirk had scheduled for the night, I swung by JCPenney to pick Penny up after her six-hour shift had ended.
Back at the house, we found Secret still snoring. The only evidence that she had even been out of the bed was the smell of chronic in the air. It was lit. After taking a hot shower, I went back into Secret’s room to grab the piece of blunt that was left in the ashtray, then went back to my room and got into the zone. Sliding into a pair of skinny high-waisted Guess jeans, I threw on a crop-top belly shirt over my head, and slid on a pair of pumps. Peeking into Secret’s room I discovered she was still asleep. I knew she was off for the night, so I told Penny I was leaving and taking the car. Snatching the car key off the kitchen table, I headed out the door to the money.
Soon as my dance was over, I wasted no time getting up outta there. I was starving, so after sliding through Taco World and grabbing a few chicken tacos with cilantro and onions, I headed toward the house. I was ready to eat and kick my feet up. The beeping sound from my phone alerted me that had a text message. I reached for my Coach bag where I thought I had put my phone, but to my surprise the light from the phone was beaming from the side of the seat. My phone must have fallen out of my purse. I hated when that happened. I reached for it as I stopped at the red light and opened my text. The number on the text was not familiar, but I opened it anyway. Reading the text, anger flushed over me. I couldn’t believe what I was reading. I also realized in that moment that I was holding Secret’s phone and not my own.
Livid, I ran four red lights on my way to the house. I threw the gearshift into park and rushed inside. All the lights were off and the house was quiet, so I knew everyone must be in their own rooms. Pushing the door to Secret’s bedroom wide open, I couldn’t believe she was still asleep. It had been a full day. “Secret,” I called her name. She stirred. “Secret, wake up.” I almost yelled this time, but the last thing I wanted to do was wake Penny up and get her involved.
“Huh.” She stirred.
“What the fuck is this?” I tossed her cell phone onto her bed, and it landed right next to her pillow.
“What?” She sat up.
“What the fuck does that shit mean?” My tone was aggressive and demanding.
“What you talkin’ about, Isis?”
“Look at the damn phone!” Picking up the phone, she opened it up. “Read the damn text from that first number.” I watched as her eyes bulged. She glanced at me for only a brief second then back at the phone. As if she needed to read it again. “Is that why you so damn tired. ’Cause you out trickin’, having sex with niggas for money?” I spat with disgust.
Scooting to the edge of the bed, she threw her legs over the side of it.
“Isis, you . . .” She tried to speak, but I cut her off.
“Don’t try to deny it. I read that shit over more than once . . . Yeah you left your phone in the car again.” I nodded at the phone in her hand. Our phones were identical; there were plenty of times when we had mistakenly grabbed each other’s phone. But Secret had a bad habit of leaving hers in the car.
The guilt of being caught was all over her face. She kept looking at the phone then back at me. That was starting to annoy the hell out of me. “Aye, you right. Okay. I been doing that shit on the side. But it’s only been with two niggas.” She said it as if she was trying to convince me that it was okay.
Tears kept running down my face. I had known all along that the job would be full of troubles. “I knew this job—or whatever you would like to call it”—my tone was sarcastic—“was too good to be true. Kirk on that bullshit.”
“Kirk doesn’t know anything about this, Isis. I set this up on my own.”
“Well, good thing I don’t believe that.”
“Believe it. It’s true, he doesn’t know. I was offered and I said yes. The money was good: one thousand dollars for one round. I couldn’t turn it down.” She shrugged her shoulders as if it was no big deal.
“But why would you, Secret? Hell, we are not hos. Shit, at least that’s what I thought.”
“Listen, I’m sorry, Isis. But like I said, it
was for the money. It ain’t like I enjoyed it. It was a quick nut, and I was through.” Again she hunched her shoulders.
I just stood back and looked at her. I could not believe what was coming out of her mouth. Never in a million years would I have guessed this. But this would not be my life; I didn’t care how much money was involved. Watching my mom destroy our life gave me a clear picture as to when to walk away. This was it for me.
“Maybe you need a reality check; the shit is nasty and downright degrading. Money ain’t never been that damn important. But you do what you want . . . I’m out of it. No more private dancing for me. Tell Kirk I quit.” I turned to leave, but just as I put my left hand on the doorknob, I realized I had something else to say. “Oh, and you might want to tell Kirk you hoing now.” I hoped it sounded as bad as it was, and I would not apologize. “I’m sure he would hate to know that he missin’ his cut.” With a heavy heart I turned and left her room. I was dumbfounded and in complete distress.
Chapter 16
Secret
I really don’t know when I came to the point of not giving a fuck about what I did. Never in a million years would I have ever thought that I would sleep with one someone strictly for the love of money. But I did. And honestly, not once after I was done did I feel sorry. Instead I just gripped the money tight that they placed in the palm of my hand. And each time I felt comfort from that. But after seeing how bad I had hurt Isis, that was the first and only time I ever felt any regret. Isis and I were like blood family; I never wanted to do anything that would intentionally hurt her.
I was sick with guilt after she confronted me with her allegations. I called up Kirk the very next morning and told him that Isis was done with the private dancing. And so was I. The last thing I wanted Isis to think was that I was continuing the lifestyle. No, I was out for good. If she was done, then so was I; whatever we did next, we would move forward together. We had to always have each other’s back. After I apologized to Isis a million times for ruining things, she had finally forgiven me. That had been a week ago, and I needed to work. Time was money. I called up Kirk and asked him to meet up with me.
“What’s up, big baller?” I greeted him.
“Nah, you got it.” He stood up and hugged me. We decided to meet at a bar downtown called Mike’s Burgers. They’re famous for juicy steak burgers, and their mixed drinks were always on point. I needed a drink.
“I thought I might beat you here, but I see you checking your clock.”
“It’s all love. I was already in the neighborhood on business. But what’s up wit’ cha? You been missin’ in action.” The waitress approached the table. “Let me get another shot of that Hennessy. And whatever she wants.” He nodded in my direction.
“Let me get a martini with three olives.” The waitress smiled at Kirk before swishing away from the table. I even think she winked at him. I swear there was not a ho in Miami that couldn’t sniff when a nigga had some money. And Kirk had it. “Hmmm, she doin’ too much. Maybe you should pay her light bill or some,” I joked.
“Shi’d, maybe.” He chuckled. The ice on his wrist was shining so bright, I couldn’t look at it head on.
“Bitch on thirst for real. But I can’t blame her, ’cause yo ass got it.” I grunted.
“I might be on that.” He smirked.
I laughed at his cockiness. Kirk was the truth. “I see you goin’ hard to on that hen. Nigga, it ain’t even two o’clock yet.”
“Yeah, but I had a long-ass night. Chasing that money ain’t got no business hours. And when you building an empire you gotta stay on boast.”
“No doubt,” I agreed. I loved to hear him drop that knowledge.
“But what’s up wit’ you, though? You got me out here.”
“What you think. I ain’t worked in a week. A new gig is a must,” I stressed.
“Yo, the set you had was it. And y’all just walked away from that. Now, I ain’t trippin’, but you still ain’t never tell me why. The clientele was straight, and the money was good. So what?” He looked to me for an answer. The waitress set his Hennessy in front of him then placed my drink in front of me. I wasted no time taking a sip.
Biting into one of the olives, I chewed for a few seconds. I could never find the words to tell him what I was doing. So I just didn’t. And I still didn’t want to talk about it. “Look, like I told you, we just decided not to continue with that. But what’s up now? I know you got us.”
“Hey, you know I always got your back. But to be honest, I got some other moves I’m making right now. So I can’t make no promises.”
“Come on, Kirk. Don’t bullshit me.” I was disappointed as hell; this was the last thing I needed to hear him say. His cell phone started to ring, and he looked at it. He held up a finger signaling me to hold on.
“What’s good?” he answered. He nodded his head a few times like the person on the other end could see him. “That shit one hundred,” he replied. I just sat and sipped my drink. I wanted to roll my eyes. Shit, fuck that call, I needed his attention right now. “That play solid. I’ma get up in a flip.” With that he ended the call.
“So it’s like that.” I was agitated, and there was no way I could hide it.
“Listen, baby girl. Don’t trip, just know that we good. But right now I gotta go.”
Not knowing what else to say, I just looked at him. I felt like I was being played, but what else could I do. “A’ight. Make moves.” I hunched my shoulders with frustration, finished off my drink, stood and bounced.
Disappointed, I swung by the supermarket and picked up some pork chops to fry for dinner. A good home-cooked meal and a blunt would make me feel a lot better. Dropping the two plastic grocery bags I had on the kitchen counter, I pulled the pork chops out first and set them on the counter.
“What you buy from the store?” Penny strolled in the kitchen.
“Some pork chops, sweet potatoes, flour, and cooking oil.”
“What you gon’ do wit’ all that?”
“I’m gon’ cook it. What you think.” I knew she was trying to poke fun. It was a known fact that I didn’t care much for cooking. I was good at it but not a fan of it. “Yep, ’bout to fry up these pork chops, with some rice and butter, and steam some sweet potatoes.”
“Now you got my stomach growling. And it’s about time I get a good home-cooked meal, ’cause those peanut butter and jelly sandwiches constipating me.” She laughed.
“Ha ha. You got jokes, huh.” I placed the two-liter Cherry Coke I had also picked up in the freezer. It would be icy cold by the time the food was done.
“Well, since you in for the night, I need to use the car so I can go hang out with Erica and Shay.”
“What y’all ’bout up to?”
“Just hangin’ out at the bowling alley for a few hours.”
“A’ight, it’s cool, but no fuckin’ drinking, ’cause you know I’ll bust your ass,” I threatened. I never really had any problem out of her when she went out, but I always threatened her just in case she forgot.
“Damn, Secret, you know I’m more responsible than that.” She played offended. And she was right: I had never busted her drinking and driving.
“Yeah, you and Erica play that sneaky shit. But I know the game, because I been there done that,” I reminded her. “Where Isis at?” I asked.
“In her room.” She reached for the car keys. I had laid them on the counter next to the stove. “I’m out, though. Aye, make sure you save me a plate. And you know I like my pork chop really crispy. So fry it hard short of burning it. And I want two big ones.” She made sure to give me precise instructions.
“Get your greedy ass outta here.” I chuckled. “Isis.” I yelled her name loud enough for her to hear me.
“What?” she yelled back. Her pet peeve was me bugging her when she was relaxing. I was surprised when she rounded the corner not even a minute later. “What’s in the bags?” was the first thing out of her mouth.
“I’m cooking pork chops for d
inner.”
“Wait a minute. What?” She threw her right hand to her chest as if shocked.
“Whatever, Penny said the same thing. You two have jokes. I’m ’bout to sizzle up in this bitch. So get ready for my finger-licking pork chops.”
“Aye, you know I’m always ready to eat. I was just laying down thinking ’bout what I was gon’ eat.”
“You need to get out that bed and get outta this damn house.” Ever since we had stopped working she hadn’t been leaving the house much. If she didn’t get out soon, I was gon’ have to take drastic measures to get her out.
“I’m cool. I gets out. Earlier today I went down to T-Mobile and paid my cell phone bill.”
“Hmm, I guess, if you want to call that getting’ out. But I’m talkin’ about really gettin’ out. Not saving your phone connection.”
“I’m good. But where the hell you been? Shit, you burn up the streets enough for the both of us. Miami streets don’t owe you nothin’.” She giggled.
“Ha ha. You got jokes. I’ll give you a slight laugh for that.” I gave a soft clap along with it. “Nah, real talk, though, I stepped out to meet up with Kirk. He’s clear about us walkin’ away from the private dancing.”
“Are you still sure that you want to walk away?” she asked. “I didn’t ask you to do that.”
“Like I have said a thousand times before, I’m sure. We been besties since we were little, and it’s a must that we stick together. Always,” I stressed, and I meant every word. I hoped she believed me.
“I’m glad you respect that. But what are we going to do for jobs? We gotta get out here and make money. The little money we have saved won’t last long with these bills constantly rolling in.”
“That’s what I’ve been thinking about. And the way I spend it, mine won’t get me past another month.”
Isis giggled. “It’ll last a bit longer, but you gon’ have to chill. It’s time to think smart and spend less.” She was always more responsible than I was.
“Aye, I’m wit’ that, but we can’t work no dead-end ass job that pays eight dollars an hour. That shit will not fly. We gotta make sure we gettin’ paid.”