by Violet Duke
Though he was starting to wear her down on the latter two.
As Tessa ambled away to take a shower in his master bathâaloneâhe noticed a cell phone on the ground near her bag, but not a smartphone. A flip phone that he didnât recognize. âTessa? Do you have two cell phones?â
Tessa froze, patted her pockets quickly and spun around to check his hands. Eyes zooming in on the phone, she rushed over to swipe it from him.
âI found it on the ground; it mustâve fallen out of your pocket. Did you drop it while you were riding? Itâs got a big crack in it.â
That seemed to alarm her even more. Frantic now, she flipped the phone open and began madly hitting the keys.
âSweetheart, whatâs wrong?â
âI shouldnât have taken it with me,â she cried out softly, sobbing as she fell to the floor. âBut I wanted to take her with me.â
That made absolutely no sense to him. But he didnât think this was one of her cute eccentricities. Seeing tears streaming down her face for the first time, true and real panic filled his veins. He raced over to pull her into his arms.
âTessa, honey, tell me whatâs going on, please. Let me help you. Is it your phone? Because if itâs broken, we can fix it or replace it.â
âI canât replace it. And it was already broken.â
More incomprehensible answers.
âTalk to me, baby. Please.â
âIt was the last thing I had left.â
Oh god.
Tessa was curled in a ball against his chest, clutching the phone to her heart. âItâs an old phone that doesnât work anymore, but itâs the only thing I had left that still had Willow alive in it.â Tessa opened it again and pressed at the buttons. Slowly, carefully this time, staring at the screen as if it would light up any second now.
It broke his heart when the phone didnât turn on.
âNow Iâve lost her forever.â Hot tears slipped down her cheeks. âWillow was the only one who used to remember my birthday. Did I ever tell you that? The only one. Every year, my mom would forgetâ¦or rather, she just didnât remember because she never bothered to. My dad, on the other hand, would remember when he could, but he was usually bone tired from working all day in construction, and all night as a handyman that itâd usually just end up being an apologetic, belated wish, weeks later.â
âBut every single year, Willow remembered. Even with everything she was going through, even if she was in the ICU, sheâd always, always remember and wish me a happy birthday.â She cradled the phone in her hands and held it up to her chest. âThe year Willowâs memory started going, sheâd taken my phone from my bag and told me to leave it with her for the day. I figured she was going to have the nurses help her bedazzle it or something so I didnât think anything of it. In fact, when I found it the next day on her nightstand looking exactly the same, Iâd forgotten that sheâd wanted it for some reason. I didnât remember until I got the ping on my calendar the next year. Willowâs dementia had fully set in by then so she hadnât remembered it was my birthday, and I was prepared for that. But when I got that ping on my phone, I started bawling like a baby.â
Tessa looked up at him, a trembling smile peeking through her tears. âWillow had left me a calendar entry to wish me a happy birthday for the following year, knowing her disease would make her forget. And not just that, but sheâd included a little note as well on the calendar agenda. A note she knew Iâd love.â
âFor years, Willow and I used to dream up these fantastic trips that weâd take together. Weâd imagine that there was some miraculous cure for Huntingtonâs and sheâd be all better so we could travel the world. And as the years passed and our dreams got bigger, we started borrowing books from the library and checking out specials on TV and the internetâanything to learn about these far-off places.â
Tessa shook her head, remembering something only she could see. âOn that birthday calendar note, Willow had listed Greece as our dream destination of the day and eating our way through the country as the getaway goal weâd discussed.â Eyes closed, she said softly, âAnd just like that, it was like she was right there with me again, dreaming with me.â
She smiled in fierce, sisterly pride. âThe truly amazing part was that by that year, Willowâs hands were almost completely rigid, similar to Jillyâs. So I can only imagine how long it took her to input all of those words.â Tessaâs fingers ran over the phone again. âIt wasnât until the following year that I discovered it probably took her a whole lot longer than Iâd imagined. There was another message that year. And then another the year following. Nine years now, and the calendar pings havenât stopped. Iâve gotten a birthday note from Willow every year since, and for that one day a year, weâve traveled all over the globe togetherâboated around New Zealand, visited hot springs in Japan…â
Trailing off, she said softly, âI donât actually know how many she input. Never wanted to look and ruin the surprise. Instead, I just bought dozens of new batteries and made sure to keep the phone stored safe, even after a lot of the phoneâs other functions stopped working five years ago. I usually only taken it out of storage on my birthdays.â
Her voice crumbled. âThis Pismo Beach trip⦠It was the first vacation trip of my life and I wanted her to share it with me. So I brought the phone with me. To keep her close on our first real getaway adventure. I even thought about putting my own calendar note as a new memory. The first new memory weâd have together. ATV racing in Pismo beach.â She buried her face against his chest and wept. âIt was stupid.â
Brian held her tight. âNo, honey. It wasnât. She wouldâve loved it. For nine years, sheâs taken you around the world. And today, you got to take her.â
âBut now the phone is broken for good,â she whispered in agony. âWhen those calendar pings would come each year, for that whole day, Iâd be able to see her face crystal clear in my mind, and hear her voice as if she was sitting right next to me. Itâs like I had her back, like she was alive again for one day every year in this phone. And it was just for me. My one little birthday present. The only one Iâd get, from the only person really whoâd ever cared to remember and celebrate my being born.â
Claws of pain and sympathy squeezed over his throat.
âNow sheâs finally gone. And even though Iâve had no family for nearly a decade, this is the first time I feel like Iâm truly, completely alone in the world.â
The last confession came out as a hoarse murmur and dissolved into broken tears.
He held her tight and just let her cry. Smoothing her hair back, he asked gently, âTessa, what can I do?â
She answered quietly, almost numbly, âCan you take me back to my apartment please?â
Pain lanced at his heart. âAnything but that, honey. Thereâs no way Iâm leaving you alone by yourself.â
âPlease, Brian. I know you think Iâm so strong, but Iâm not always. Not now. Not over this. I just want to go to bed. Escape for a while. Cry myself into tomorrow and hope it hurts just a little bit less come morning.â
She looked like she was hanging on by the thinnest of threads. When another heartbreaking tear slid down her cheek, he finally relented, âOkay, sweetheart. Just let me make a quick call first.â
A half hour later, he was in Tessaâs bed, holding her under the covers and silently providing what little comfort he could until she eventually fell asleep.
Heâd asked Abby to watch Skylar for the night so he could stay with Tessa. That was the only way he was going to let her stay here. But if it were up to him, they wouldnât be here at all. Her bedroom was worse than her living room. It wasnât a home
. The room was perfectly functional, yes, but it lacked the warmth that a home should have, the warmth born and bred by family.
Thinking of Tessaâs family brought him right back to the one person in her family that wasnât plagued with HD. Tessaâs mother. God, his stomach felt like it was being sent through a meat grinder every time he thought about what her mother had forced upon her when sheâd been even younger than Skylar was now, how sheâd treated Tessa then and continued to treat her now.
The fact that Tessa had turned into the strong, amazing woman she was just made him all the more impressed with her, in awe of her.
That much more in love with her.
And that fact was what made bringing her back here so much tougher. She didnât belong here in this apartment. Not anymore. She deserved a home. She deserved a family so she didnât feel like she was alone in the world.
And more and more, he wanted that home and family to be one they shared together.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
TESSA WAS BEAT.
Itâd been a grueling weekâone that she hadnât been ready to face after her meltdown last weekend. Sheâd had three grant proposals rejected on Monday, and discovered that one of her freelancers had submitted an âaccidentallyâ plagiarized piece on Tuesday. The clean-up for that had been hell. Then to add insult to injury, sheâd caught a nasty bug midweek that had made the entire rest of the week move at a snailâs pace. Now that it was finally the weekend, part of her just wanted to crawl into bed and sleep the day away, but thankfully, the rest of her was running on fumes and excitement as she finished up the dish she was taking over to Brianâs house for the picnic Skylar had planned for today.
Tessa had never been to a picnic before, and the invitation had been the one bright point in her week. Plus, spending the whole morning making one of the desserts that could always make her smileâeven when she felt she couldnâtâhad actually left her feeling almost like her old self by the time afternoon rolled around.
After parking in the driveway behind Connorâs Charger, Tessa went around to the side gate to head out into Brianâs backyard. The sizzle of the grill and chorus of chatter greeted her like a warm summer wave.
âOoh, ooh, sheâs here!â Skylar jumped up to give her a runaway-train hug. âOkay, now we can officially start the picnic!â
Brian came over and slid his arm around. âSkylar apparently has an announcement she wants to make before we start eating. And she didnât want to start until you got hereâshe said she wanted her whole family to hear it.â
Family. Tessa looked around at the sea of happy faces. Brian and Skylar, Skylarâs grandparents, Connor and Abby, Becky and her parents and siblings.
Yes, this was definitely a family. One that Tessa would be honored to be a part of, in whatever capacity.
âAlright, kiddo. Youâre up,â called out Brian, giving the floor to Skylar.
âHi everyone!â Skylar waved. âOkay, I know everyoneâs been really worried about me so I wanted to make a small announcement. Over the last couple of weeks, I got to talk with so many amazing, inspiring kids and adults who are living with HD.â A small smile was directed Tessaâs way. âAll of them are out there living, dreaming, and fighting. Making the most of their lives…more than Iâve been making of mine lately.â Her voice sobered a little. âHere I am, spending so much time thinking about what might happen if I have the HD gene when there are kids out there whoâve told me they only dream about having everything that I have. The ânormalâ life I havenât really appreciated.â
She took in a deep breath. âThatâs why I donât want to do it anymore. I want to focus on living, and being a kid. It doesnât make sense to waste a whole lifetime being afraid of my disease instead of being happy with my life. These kids I met canât have a ânormalâ childhood but so far, I can. Iâve just been to stuck on the what-ifs to see that. And I donât think itâs fair to all my new friendsâor myselfâif I didnât live my life to the fullest, without worrying about the HD gene until I absolutely have to. Soââa strong smile spread across her faceââfor now, Iâve decided not to do the genetic testing.â
Tessaâs hand flew to her chest. For her, it had never been about whether Skylar took the test, not really, but rather, whether or not Skylar came to the decision on her own.
âTo be honest, I of course still do really want to know,â continued Skylar, âand Iâll probably change my mind one day. But for right now, I want to live my life. Iâm not going to waste my time worrying or being angry and sad as much anymore. I want to do the oppositeâhelp more and get involved too like my Uncle Connor and Tessa do. As much as I can.â
Her gaze spanned the yard, loving looking at all the people in her life. âAlso, I really, really want to fall in love one day. And not just because driving my dad crazy when I start dating will be super funny.â
Brian groaned, while everyone else laughed. But even so, there was still a smile on his face. And profound pride in his eyes.
âSo anyway, thatâs all. Just wanted to share my decision with all of you because youâre all why my life is so happy to begin with. Okay, letâs eat!â
A burst of applause sounded around the yard and Tessa just looked around at it all.
Brian wrapped his arms around her middle. âYou did this. You helped her get her life back; you helped me get my daughter back.â
âNo. She did it all on her own. That is one special, amazing little girl you have there.â
BRIAN LOOKED OVER at his animated daughter, watched as she walked around to greet everyone. This was the happiest heâd seen her in months.
And for the first time in a long while, he felt like he could breathe again.
Out of the corner of his eye, he finally noticed that Tessa had a big casserole skillet and a tiny little cooler on the ground beside her so he quickly moved to grab it. âIâll go put these on the table for you.â He peeled back the foil and stared down at it. âWhat is it?â It looked like a cinnamon rolls, but he swore he smelled garlic.
Tessa smiled. âItâs one of my specialties. Sweet garlic French toast roll with shiso ice cream.â
A slow, cricket-friendly silence unrolled across the yard.
âGarlic what with what kind of ice cream?â asked Skylar, peering down at the dish in something akin to fear.
âI make a sweet dough similar to a cinnamon roll, but instead of cinnamon, I use ground garlic with the sugar and butter. Then I roll it, bake it, and let it sit in a French toast batter,â explained Tessa. âAfter that, I transfer the whole thing into a square skillet and bake it againâso it almost comes out like a bread pudding on the bottom half. Dust it with powdered sugar and a bit of garlic powder. Then I usually serve it with my shiso ice cream drizzled with honey and caramelized condensed milk.â When everyone continued to stare at her, she chuckled and reassured them, âItâs good, I promise.â
âOkay, I have to try that,â said Abby. âBring it here.â
The skillet was swooped out of Tessaâs hands by Skylar, and the small cooler at Tessaâs feet was liberated from her as well, this time by Becky.
âButâ¦itâs dessert,â protested Tessa. She looked at Brian. âI swear, itâs a sweet dish, not a savory one. Itâs not like garlic bread.â
He chuckled. âOh, donât worry. They get that. With Becky here, the sugar twins become three-prong-strong as the sugar triplets. They can eat dessert before, during, and after meals.â
Everyone silently watched as Abby put a huge forkful of the roll and the accompanying green ice cream, all covered with the gooey caramel and honey in her mouth. A few slow chews later and the groan of culinary bliss that split the air
had them all rushing forward to grab bowls and heap on servings as well.
Tessa, meanwhile, just stood there staring at the crazy activity going on all around her, blinking in wonder.
âYou okay, sweetheart?â he asked her, brushing a gentle kiss on her cheek to break her from her trance.
âIâve never had this before,â she murmured quietly.
Brian smiled. âWhat, a rabid clan of folks fighting for the last piece of food?â
She laughed and shook her head. âA family.â Gazing at Skylar, she added almost reverently, âSkylar is so lucky to have a family like this. HD gene or not, sheâs going to be just fine.â
He wrapped his arms around her, wanting to ask her then and there if she wanted a lifetime membership to join their crazy familyâ¦when suddenly, they heard an ear-splitting scream from Skylar. They both spun around and saw Abby clap her hand over her mouth.
Tessa rushed forward. âOhmigod, is something wrong with the dessert?â She was already grabbing the paper towel roll so Abby could spit it out.
âNo, no,â cried out Skylar, jumping up and down as she turned to Abby and nodded vigorously. âTell them.â
âHoney,â said Abby quietly, âtoday was your big announcement day.â
Skylar rolled her eyes. âOMG, if you wonât tell them, I will!â
âTell us what?â broke in Brian, his expression caught between concern and confusion.
Abby sighed, even though her eyes were dancing with excitement. âSkylar overheard me saying to Connor that Iâm probably going to be asking him to haul Tessa over here to make this for me when I have my three a.m. pregnancy cravings.â
Stunned, Brianâs head whipped between Connor and Abby. âPregnancy?â
Connor nodded, his expression that of pure proud-papa joy.
Brian rushed over to scoop Abby up in a huge python squeeze. âHoly shit! Congratulations, you two!â