by Violet Duke
Jamison heaved a sigh and spit blood onto the grass. He should have known. He should have known Jake hadnât completely forgiven him for the thing with Naomi. He should have known he was on notice and that the slightest infractionâlet alone something as serious as what went down todayâwould get him booted out of his brotherâs circle forever.
He wanted to get angry and stay angry, to blame Jake for being a rigid, unyielding asshole, but he couldnât.
This wasnât only about letting Jake down. Jamison had let all of his brothers down, all of the men and women who had ever been a part of his firehouse family. A family, any family, was built on trust and respect and there was nothing more disrespectful than what Jamison had done. He deserved to suffer for his mistake, and knew he was going to have to work hard to earn his way back into the good graces of all the people he cared about.
Jake obviously wasnât ready to give Jamison a chance right nowâand he might never be, a thought that made Jamisonâs heart feel like it was being squeezed in twoâbut maybe Maddie would be a different story.
Jamison knew she was upset, but sheâd forgiven her ex-husband and moved past the pain heâd caused her. They were now friends who exchanged weekly emails, and Serge had cheated on her while they were married, for Godâs sake. Jamisonâs infraction had occurred before he and Maddieâs relationship had been anything more than friendly. Surely sheâd be able to see that he deserved a second chance.
Holding tight to the hope, he wiped the blood from his face using the bottom of his tee shirt and started across the street, grateful the bakery had already closed and he didnât have to worry about his battered features scaring away any of Maddieâs customers. He reached the front doorâexpecting to see the Closed sign flipped and continue on around to the backâbut the Open sign was still in place and Lucy was sweeping up behind the counter.
Jamison let himself in, the tinkle of the bells above the door seeming ridiculously cheerful considering his mental and physical state.
Lucy glanced up, brown eyes widening when she saw his face. âWow, he really did a number on you, huh? Are you okay?â
Jamison started to nod, but then shrugged instead. âI donât know. Iâm looking for Maddie. Is she upstairs?â
Lucy bit her lip, her short, stubby brown pigtails twitching as she turned to look over her shoulder and then back to Jamison. âShe just scooted through the back,â Lucy whispered. âYou might be able to catch her if you hurry. She told me not to say anything, but itâs obvious you two have been having a thing and itâs been making her so happy. I donât want her to run away before sheâs heard your side of the story.â
By the time she got to ârun away,â Jamison was already sprinting toward the back, throwing a quick âThank you,â over his shoulder to Lucy as he ran. He reached the rear of the bakery and banged through the door in time to see Maddieâs little white VW bug all the way down the alley to the left. He started after her, but before he could even call her name, she pulled out onto the street and was gone.
Jamison cursed beneath his breath as he tugged out his phone and pulled up Maddieâs name on his contacts. A moment later, he heard her phone ring inside the bakery. He followed the sound back inside to find Lucy standing at the end of the counter with Maddieâs cell in her hand.
Jamison ended the call with a sigh.
âShe told me to keep it in case of an emergency with the bakery,â Lucy said, sympathy clear in her voice. âShe decided to get out of town for the night.â
âAny idea where sheâs gone?â Jamison asked.
Lucy shook her head. âNo. I heard her talking to one of her friends, but I donât know which one.â She set Maddieâs cell on top of the bakery case and turned back to Jamison with a cautious smile. âCan I get you some croissants or something to take home? To make you feel better?â
Jamison tried to smile, but realized his lip was split and decided it hurt too much. âNo, but thanks. And thanks for trying to help me talk to Maddie. I appreciate it.â
âYeah, well, I havenât known her long, but I know that sheâs been a thousand times happier since you two started dating.â
âShe told you we were together?â Jamison asked, hope sparking to life inside him, only to be doused when Lucy shook her head.
âNo, but Iâve got a sixth sense about these kind of things,â she said. âAnd you both get all starry-eyed when you look at each other. I honestly canât believe no one else has figured it out yet.â
Jamison nodded, a bittersweet feeling rising inside of him. He loved that someone had noticed what was going on, but he didnât want Lucy to be the only witness to the rise and fall of Jamison and Maddie. He wanted Jamison and Maddie to make a comeback, and for the ring in the bag heâd tucked into his pocket to find a home on Maddieâs left ring finger.
He couldnât believe it was too late. Maddie would come home. The rehearsal was tomorrow and the wedding the day after. She wouldnât miss Naomiâs big day, no matter how upset she was. Maddie would be back, and heâd know exactly where to find her. He could wait for her outside the restaurant where Jake and Naomi were hosting their rehearsal dinner and talk her into taking a drive. She would give him that much, at least the chance to explain.
Now he only had to figure out what to say to make her see he deserved a second chance. He had a little over twenty-four hours, and he was determined to use every one plotting ways to win back the one person he couldnât stand to lose.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
BY THE TIME MADDIE fought her way through Atlantaâs rush hour traffic to Dawnâs new apartment, it was almost seven-thirty and her crying jag had subsided, leaving her red-eyed and blotchy faced, but in relative control.
The control held through greeting Dawn at the door and hugging Marshall and Emmie, her two kids, hello. It held through digging a path between the moving boxes to the corner of the living room to spread fresh sheets on the futon Dawn had graciously invited Maddie to crash onâdespite the fact that Dawnâs place was still in a state of thinly organized chaosâand eating zucchini pasta leftovers at the bar in Dawnâs kitchen.
Maddie even managed to work up a few smiles as the kids told her about their new school over bowls of ice cream. She was glad they were settling in so well, and thrilled that Dawn was now close enough to be reached for emergency meetings in less than two hoursâeven during rush hour.
Listening to Dawn read the kids a chapter from âRamona Quimby, Age 8,â and helping tuck the kids into their beds kept Maddieâs spirits up until shortly after eight-thirty, when she and Dawn finally settled onto the sofa with mugs of steamy peppermint tea and a box of ladyfinger cookies open on the cushions between them.
Only thenâwith the lights dimmed and the kids sleeping soundly, far from the grownup gossipâdid Maddie finally let it all out.
âWow,â Dawn said when Maddie was finished. âIs he okay? Sounds like that was a serious beating.â
Maddie nodded. âHeâs okay. His brother and one of the other firefighters pulled the guy off of him before it got too bad, although even from across the street I could see there was blood.â
Dawn hummed around the rim of her mug as she took a long, considering sip. âWell, that was pretty brave, really. That he refused to fight back.â
âHe refused to fight back because he knew he deserved to be pounded,â Maddie said. âHeâs the one who slept with his bossâs wife. And then lied to everyone about it.â
Dawnâs lips pursed to one side as she reached for a cookie.
âWhat?â Maddie asked. âWhy the prune face?â
âNothing,â Dawn said, hesitating for a moment before she added, âI just think maybe itâs not that he lied t
o everyone thatâs got you so worked up. You feel like he lied to you, is that it?â
âHe did lie to me,â Maddie said. âHe told me heâd never cheated on any woman he was serious about.â
Dawn shrugged. âWell, it doesnât sound like what you found out today invalidates that claim. I mean, she was the one cheating, not him.â
Maddie frowned. âIt takes two to tango, Dawn.â
âI know,â she conceded. âBut at the same time, Jamison wasnât the one who stood up in a church and swore to love, honor, and cherish his boss for the rest of his life, you know? That was the wifeâs promise, and sheâs the one who betrayed it.â
âHmph.â Maddieâs frown became a full-fledged scowl.
Dawn leaned in, tapping Maddieâs hand gently with her cookie. âListen, I agree it was a crappy thing for him to do behind his bossâs back, but sometimes love makes us do crappy things.â
Maddie grabbed a cookie from the box. âI donât agree. I think if itâs real love then there should be nothing crappy about it.â
âIt should be all sparkles and unicorns?â Dawn asked, lifting a pierced brow as she took a bite.
âMaybe not all sparkles and unicorns,â Maddie said, chewing thoughtfully. âI know a good relationship takes work and compromise, but I donât think there should be any darkness. No big, bad secrets, no behavior that makes you feel sick to your stomach. And definitely no cheating.â
Dawn finished her cookie in silence and took another sip of tea before setting her mug down on the floor next to the couch and turning to pin Maddie with a serious look.
âUh oh,â Maddie said. âYouâre getting ready to say things I donât want to hear.â
Dawnâs lips curved at the edges. âThatâs the best part of old friends, right? You can always tell what theyâre going to do next.â
Maddie winced before setting her own mug on the floor. âOkay, lay it on me.â
âI want you to be sure this is really about Jamison, and not the other man who broke your heart,â Dawn said, pressing on when Maddie tried to interrupt. âI know you and Serge are allegedly âfriendsâ now, and everythingâs hunky dory, but I saw you right after it happened, Maddie. You were a complete wreck. I know how much Sergeâs lying and cheating hurt you, and I know you probably canât help but put yourself in Jamisonâs bossâs shoes instead of Jamisonâs, butâ¦â
Dawn sighed. âI mean, itâs obvious you love Jamison. And from what I saw on the camping trip, Iâd say the feelingâs mutual. You have crazy chemistry, you can have a serious conversation without him running for the hills, and from what youâve told me on the phone, it sounds like youâre good friends, too. Those things are harder to find in a relationship than youâd think. Are you sure you want to throw that all away because he made a mistake months before you two even thought about dating?â
Maddie threaded her fingers together and squeezed until her fingertips went a little numb. âI donât know,â she finally said, her breath rushing out. âI thought Iâd gotten to a place where I trusted him completely, but this⦠It changes things. I canât pretend it doesnât.â
âEven though it happened months ago?â
âYes, itâs⦠I donâtâ¦â Maddie paused, struggling to find the words to explain what she was feeling. âWhen Iâm with Jamison,â she began slowly, âI believe heâs being honest with me and loves me as much as he says. But when weâre apart, I start thinking about the man Iâve known as a friend for twenty years andâ¦things donât add up. The old Jamison didnât fall for girls like me, and he certainly didnât want to talk about having babies less than a year into a relationship.â
âYou guys had the baby talk?â Dawnâs eyebrows lifted. âThat is serious.â
âI know,â Maddie said, nodding, eyes wide. âAnd I thought I was ready for things to get that serious, but this is evidence that Jamison isnât who I think he is. Or that heâs exactly who I thought he wasâ¦if that makes any sense.â
Dawn frowned for a moment. âYouâre saying this behavior is in keeping with the lady killer Jamison you used to know.â
âYes, exactly.â Maddie nodded more emphatically.
âThe Jamison he was before he fell in love with his friend Maddie and saw what heâd been missing,â Dawn said, making Maddieâs nose scrunch. âBefore he realized he didnât want to be a lady killer anymore and decided to settle down with the woman he loved, have a family, and be happy.â
Maddie snatched another cookie from the bag. âWhy do I get the feeling that youâre on his side?â
âIâm on your side,â Dawn said. âBut I think that means Iâm also on his side. Apart from the occasional stress-induced freak out as youâve learned to trust him, youâve been happier the past three weeks than Iâve ever seen you. Ever. Even back when we were kids with nothing to worry about except whether or not weâd get our silver Girl Scout award.â
âThat was stressful,â Maddie said. âI really wanted that award. It was going to be the completion of my Cadette Journey.â
Dawn smiled gently. âI know you did. But I think you want a future with Jamison more. And honestly Maddie, heâs done nothing to deserve being dumped, has he? Did he ever tell you flat out that the woman he was into before wasnât married?â
âNo.â Maddie hesitated, wondering why she still felt as if sheâd been lied to. âBut he should have told me the truth. I feel like he deliberately withheld the fact that Wendy was married because he knew it would upset me.â
âMaybe he did, but is that really a deal breaker?â Dawn asked, snagging her mug from the ground. âI think you should at least give him a chance to explain.â
âYouâre awfully into talking things out lately,â Maddie grumbled.
Dawn laughed. âGuess Iâve had too much therapy.â She took a sip of tea, blue eyes twinkling over the rim of her mug. âMaybe you should just fly to San Francisco, track down Craig, and pound his face in. Maybe thatâs all you need to move on without any of the been-cheated-on baggage.â
Maddie rolled her eyes, unable to resist the grin tugging at her lips. âGeez, can you imagine? Me and Craig throwing punches?â
Dawn giggled. âI can, actually. I think you could hold your own, especially if we got a little whiskey in you first.â
Maddie sighed. âNo more whiskey for me. Thatâs what got me into this mess in the first place.â She grabbed another cookie. âBesides, I donât want to pound Craig. If Iâm honest, Serge is the one Iâm still upset with. Heâs the one who promised to love me and then lied to me and used me like a security blanket until he was strong enough to come out, all while my fertility wasted away and my dreams of a family were put in jeopardy.â
âYou realize you just proved my argument from a second ago, right?â Dawn asked. âThe one where I said Jamison wasnât the one who deserved the backlash?â
Maddie narrowed her eyes. âYou should have been a lawyer, not an art teacher.â
Dawn rolled her eyes dramatically. âBut then I would have missed all the excitement of barely making enough money to get by and learning twenty different ways to make a three dollar pasta dinner. What fun would that have been?â
âYou make a great three dollar pasta dinner.â Maddie smiled. âIâm so glad youâre going to be close from now on.â
âMe too,â Dawn said. âThat way you can come talk some sense into me when I try to dump the amazing new guy Iâve met after we hit our first bump in the road.â
â�
�Have you met someone? Already?â Maddie asked, excited for Dawn, though she wasnât the biggest fan of relationships in general at the moment.
Dawn snorted. âAre you kidding me? I havenât had the chance to do anything but organize my materials for class, run the kids to and from school, unpack a few boxes, and try to figure out how to buy groceries and entertain the children until my first paycheck.â
âDo you need a loan?â Maddie asked, feeling awful that she hadnât asked earlier. Moves were expensive and Dawn hadnât had any time to save up for hers. âItâs no problem if you do. Iâve saved a ton of money living above the bakery.â
Dawn shook her head. âThanks, but weâre fine. Iâm going to put off getting cable for a month or two, nothing serious. It will be good for the kids. They can catch up on their reading, and Iâm going to get my old bike fixed so I can ride with them in the park around the corner. Weâll probably enjoy it so much theyâll never want to watch cartoons again.â
Maddie smiled. âSo Marshallâs over his SpongeBob addiction?â
âI wish.â Dawn glanced heavenward. âIsnât that damned sponge ever going to go away? I swear, that crap started when I was in high school. I remember Dave watching it and giggling his head off when we used to smoke pot in the basement at his parentsâ house.â She shook her head. âShould have told me something about him right there.â
âI didnât know you smoked pot,â Maddie said, mildly scandalized, though Dawn had always been the wildest of their group of friends. âYou never told me that.â
âOnly a few times in high school,â Dawn said with a shrug. âI figured out pretty quickly that it wasnât for me, so I didnât feel I needed to share. Sometimes itâs nice to make mistakes in private. If you have the luxury.â
Maddie took another bite of her cookie, thinking about private mistakes. If Jamisonâs boss hadnât found out about the affair, then Jamison would have been allowed to make his mistake in private, too. Maddie never would have known that Wendy had been a married woman, and she and Jamison would have moved forward with their plans and been as happy as pigs in poo.